S02E013: Eliza Harper (20), from Nottingham

A sign on the side of a building reads, “Welcome to PussyKats, Nottingham’s Finest Gentlemen’s Club” ... And then we’re inside. It’s a cheesy, dark, noisy – BUSY - dive. Plenty of ‘gentlemen’ enjoying a drink whilst mostly naked woman dance (or writhe) on the stage and in a couple of cases, on the businessmen themselves.

We watch one woman in particular, spinning around a pole, upside down, legs spread wide with a g-string barely covering her crotch. Under the harsh flashing lights we can make out that she’s slim, clearly fit and healthy, with small but nicely shaped boobs. Her hair is a mix of blonde and pale blue, we can’t really make out her face because of the way she’s spinning around that pole.

Later, backstage - in a little dressing room. She’s a lot easier to see sits infront of a broken mirror and lights a cigarette. She’s not the most attractive girl we’ve seen. Slightly boyish, a little thick through the body. Her skin is very pale, her hair short and blue-blonde, under the mountain of make-up her features are fairly anonymous save for a try-hard-bad-girl-lipcurl.

She speaks with a strong Nottinghamshire accent, with a bit of a try-hard tone. At the end of each comment she twists her face/purses her lips, as if she thinks this makes her look ‘bad’, ‘cool’, or ‘edgy’.

“Hello. My name is Eliza Harper. I’m 20 years old, I’m from Nottingham, I work as an exotic dancer, and I’m here today because I want a dog to make me his bitch!”

We cut to another location, Eliza now sitting on a bar stool in the currently empty club. A couple of cleaners are at work, but there are no customers. Eliza has showered and removed her make-up. Wearing a white towelling robe and looking a lot younger than she actually is. As she speaks we realise that she is isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed.

Tell us about your fantasies...

“I don’t really have fantasies, really.” She says, almost as if she’s trying to figure out what the word ‘fantasy’ means. “I just see filthy things and I want to try them.”

Cut to another thought, “I tried to suck a dog at a party once, but he wasn’t interested, so I sucked some lads instead.”

Cut to another, “I don’t know if I’ll feel good about it or not, I just want to feel it. I don’t think about it much, but ever since I first saw a woman being fucked on tele by a dog, I’ve wanted to try it. They always look like it hurts, but in a really good way. I like that.”

So, the bigger the dog, the more fun you expect to have?

Eliza thinks about this, trying to figure out if it’s a trick question or a statement of the obvious. “Yeah. Yeah, I think so. I want to be fucked with a really big cock ... A giant one, like a horse, or a donkey, or, like, a camel, or something ... This show is only dogs though, right ... You don’t do horses do you?”

Cut to Bernard’s Volkswagen Passat Estate pulling up outside the club. Bernard getting out, heading to the rear of the car and opening it up ... Then, after a brief pause, the impressive sight of his Great Dane, Dino, jumping out.

Bernard talks to camera as Dino wanders around beside him. “This is Dino ... He’s a 7 year old Great Dane ... And we’re still waiting to find a woman who can truly handle everything he has to offer...” He looks up at the sign for KittyKats... “Maybe this is the kind of establishment we should have been coming to all along...”

Cut to Eliza in the club.

If we’re filming here, I presume your employer knows what you’re doing today?

“Yeah, I told him I was going to be on the show and he was like, begging, me to do it in the club, and to show the club off and all that. So make sure you get the sign in. I think he thinks it’ll improve business. No publicity is publicity and that. No, wait, all publicity is good publicity, is that it?”

Is this something you would like to do on-stage with a live crowd in here?

Eliza smiles, “Yeah, I think so. I’m a natural show-off. I like it when everyone is looking at me.”

At that point Dino walks in, big feet skidding on the polished concrete floor, Bernard following at the other end of the leash. Eliza looks round and sees them coming toward her, a big genuine smile crosses her face. “Oh wow!” She gasps, “Biiiiig doggy!”

She gets off the chair and crouches down to welcome the huge animal, stroking his head and neck. Leaning in close to him so that he can smell her face. He doesn’t lick her but his cold nose leaves a wet mark across her cheek.

She breaks away from Dino to complete her interview. The whole time she is talking to us she is looking at Dino, who sits patiently to her side, waiting to be called. Her nipples are erect and she’s breathing hard, although she’s trying not to show it.

Are you looking forward to a little doggy action then?

“Absolutely. I can’t wait. I just want his huge cock inside me...” She casts a sideway view at Dino, comments, “He is huge, isn’t he?” She looks to Bernard. “Is everything in proportion?”

Bernard responds dryly. “If everything were in proportion to his penis he’d have to be 10 feet tall!”

Eliza smiles but you can tell she didn’t get the joke.

What’s the biggest thing you’ve ever taken up there?

“I’ve been fisted a bit ... I like that. Especially if my boyfriend is in a bad mood...”

Does your boyfriend know about this?

“What, today? With the dog? No, he doesn’t. He knows I want to do a dog, but he doesn’t know I’m here today.”

How do you think he will react when he finds out?

“He got pretty turned on when I told him I wanted to do it, so I think he’ll probably like it. If he doesn’t ... Ah well, fuck ‘im!” She shrugs.

A few seconds later, Eliza is on the dancing podium/stage. No customers left in the club, just a few staff including a couple of her fellow dancers. The music is turned down so as not to upset Dino, but still loud enough to echo around the empty club.

The lights aren’t flashing anymore – just plain spots illuminating the raised stage. Our cameras are positioned infront and to the sides, almost at floor level. The stage and the lights mean that this will probably be one of our clearest viewing experiences in the entire series. We won’t miss a thing.

It’s not much of a strip routine as all she has to remove is her gown, but she gives it her all – a sensuous, almost seductive grind that allows us to see her pale flesh, her soft belly, and small but nicely formed breasts which are so firm that they barely need a bra to keep them under control, a completely waxed pussy. Turning around to twerk for us, showing us her back, and her wide bottom. Thick, but not fat, legs – and high heels (the only thing she is wearing other than nail-polish). When she performs that twerk, developing it into a full double-over bend, we can see her pussy pushing back between her thighs in graphic detail.

Altogether she’s no knock-out, but we have no doubt there are plenty of Nottingham’s business community who would be happy to have her on their lap.

She beckons to Dino to join her on the stage and Bernard releases the beast. Dino immediately bounds toward the naked young women, clumsily managing to get up the half dozen steps from floor to stage.

She crouches down to welcome him, and wastes no time getting to work on him - rubbing his belly and moving right to his sheath before taking hold of the shaft of his cock (that is still within the sheath).

She’s still writhing in time with the music, rubbing her small boobs against his side as she jerks his cock. Her nipples rubbing against his short hair as she jerks the dog to a full erection. Looking into camera, a filthy, dirty-girl teeth bared snarling smile.

The massive dane cock is growing in the sheath, and poking out of it. She can feel it growing in her hand, but when she angles her body backwards and to the side so that she can see under his belly she can’t keep the surprised look off her face. We can almost see her mouth the word, FUCK before she returns to her dirty-writhing dog-wanking dance.

When she figures he’s ready she gets to her feet and tries to turn her back on him, but he’s sniffing at her wet pussy, following her as she turns. She pushes his head away and manages to get her back to him, then bends forward and puts her hands on her knees – her arse stuck out behind her. The huge beast’s head is level with her arse, his cold nose nuzzling between her arse-cheeks, his big tongue exploring between her thighs – working that pussy. Tasting that honey-pot. The dancer gasping as the hot wet tongue drags between her pussy lips and over her clit.

She moans and gasps as he stands behind her, working her pussy with his tongue. Her trying to maintain her balance as his massive head pushes toward her snatch, between her thighs from behind. She’s reaching back to take a butt-cheek in each hand and spread them wide, hoping he’ll turn his attention to licking her arsehole next...