Chapter 3

My heart fell into my stomach. Poor, sweet Abigail! She was being blackmailed by an uneducated cretin for an alleged transgression of which she was completely innocent! And what cruel irony that the individual at the heart of the misunderstanding is a person she actively despises and with whom she has nothing in common. Imagine, an ignorant conservative with such deplorable opinions thinking he had a shot with Abigail when she was already dating such an attractive, compassionate man who shared both her interests and her values.

Again, I had to walk a fine line between setting boundaries to protect her and betraying that I had a window into her secrets. In the week that passed, Abigail and I spoke as usual about her stress with college applications, her political advocacy, and her love for William- but I heard nothing about Trevor Jameson or William’s family. I pried as much as I could without revealing myself. To learn more, I needed to wait patiently for the next entry.

Entry 3

October 15, 2023

Dear Diary, The next few days I felt hazy and disassociated. I noticed my attention wandering in class, even my favorite ones. My AP Gov teacher, Mr Gadley, even asked if I was ok. Short, balding, and bespectacled, he was my favorite teacher, and the one I’d asked to write my college recommendation letter. I assured him that everything was fine, and that I was just under the weather. Looking at me with kind eyes, he said that he was always there if I needed someone to talk to. I felt grateful, but embarassed.

I needed to pull myself together and FAST! This was the most important time in the college application process. Most of my applications were due in January, but my early decision for Harvard was due in December. I couldn’t afford to let my grades slide. I had worked my whole life for this moment!

My friends rallied around me. I told Ashley almost everything about last weekend, leaving out the detail about smoking my first cigarette. That was too humiliating! I told her how Trevor was hitting on me and how William’s family was harassing me.

“Oh Abigail- I’m so sorry! What a bunch of lowlife creeps! I don’t even know who’s worse!”

“Probably William’s dad Frank would win that dubious distinction. He’s the most cruel and abusive person I’ve ever met. Added to which, he smells like he bathes in sewage,” I said, wincing at the thought of him.

“My God. How is it possible that William grew up in that environment?” she sympathized.

“His brother’s no better. He’s a junkie who gets off on hurting animals. And he’s dating Candace Nightingale, the dumbest girl at school. She’s the worst. I hate her. She even fools around with Frank sometimes,” I gritted my teeth.

“Frank?”

“William’s dad,” I clarified.

“Oh,” She looked confused for a moment.

“Of course, Trevor’s not a whole lot better,” I continued. “I mean he looks fine enough, I guess, but he is such an ignorant racist. He actually called immigrants trash!”

Ashley gasped.

“Sadly that seems to be the baseline position of the GOP these days,” she commiserated.

“I know! And he is completely impervious to any kind of rational argument. Somebody really needs to educate that kid,” I said.

“I don’t think there’s any point. These MAGA people are in a cult of bigotry and grievance,” she replied.

I nodded, agreeing wholeheartedly. “The term deplorable really is befitting. And the rich, white ones are the worst. All they do is disparage anyone who doesn’t look like them, while taking advantage of tax breaks for the rich, and as if that weren’t enough- THEY claim to be the real victims- especially if a strong woman is calling them out on their behavior,”

“Preach sister. I love you Abigail. You’ll always be my bestie,” We hugged. Our friendship means everything to me.

“We really need to have a double date sometime with you, me, Henry, and William. I need to get my mind off everything. I feel like I’m losing it!!” I complained.

“100%. College apps are killing me! I need some downtime,” she agreed.

After a little bit of time with Ashley, I was feeling more myself again. I must have just been stressed out. The rest of the week I was back to my usual level of focus and energy. I did all my volunteer work at the shelter, crushed at debate competition, and even managed to make a dent in a few college essays.

Friday night was date night with William. He surprised me with tickets to see Yo-Yo Ma, my favorite cellist. His playing was rapturous and ecstatic. I felt with him viscerally as he played the Elgar Concerto with passion and grace. As the music grew increasingly agitated, I squeezed William’s hand. Eventually he began to anticipate my reactions and squeezed back harder as the music intensified. He knew me so well. I couldn’t help but subtly brush my hand over his penis. I wished there was a private place for us to go. I was desperate for him to be inside me again.

Left unspoken was the guilt I felt from last weekend. Nothing untoward had happened- but I felt terrible not sharing everything with him immediately. We had never lied to each other by commission or omission and I didn’t want to start now. At dinner that night, I finally brought it up.

“William, there’s something that happened last week that I need to tell you about,” He looked at me tenderly.

“Last week when I was volunteering for Safe Rides, I went to Trevor Jameson’s house to give someone a ride home,” I confessed.

“Isn’t he the douchey MAGA bro in your government class?” he asked.

“Yep. One and the same. Anyway, he was really coming on to me hard at the party.” I said.

“But you guys have absolutely nothing in common!” he said incredulously.

“Exactly. Which is why I completely shut him down ... That and I happen to be seeing someone right now,” I said with a twinkle. William laughed.

“Ok- good to know I have nothing to worry about. Can you handle him or do you want me to get involved?” William offered.

I shook my head. “No, I’ve got this. He’s just an over entitled white prick who thinks he’s God’s gift because of the family he was born into. Definitely not my type,”

“Haha, also good to know that my girlfriend doesn’t have a thing for assholes,”

I shuddered momentarily.

“There’s another thing, too. The person I gave a ride to was your brother and his girlfriend Candace” I gritted my teeth at the mere thought of that hussy.

“Yeah, I think it’s fair to say that Johnny and I have very different taste in women.” William said shaking his head.

“Ugghh, she is such a stupid ... never mind. What I wanted to say is that when I dropped them off, your dad was coming on to me too.” At this, William burst out laughing.

“Now I can guarantee you’re misinterpreting that,” he said.

“How come? How would you know?” I asked

“Well all week he’s been going on and on about Candace, in his typically crude fashion. I think they might have a thing going on too.”

What a dumb bitch.

Visibly wincing, I replied, “Yeah- I think I picked up on that. But how do you know he’s not into me too?”

Again William cracked up.

“Because all week he’s been talking about how there’s- and these are his words- ‘no one as good in bed as a dumb ho’.” He then added, doing his best impression of his dad, “not like your girl who’s always running her mouth with them fancy words.”

I couldn’t believe it. Was it possible that Frank was sincere? Was I really not his type? Would a hideous looking, foul smelling red neck really not be attracted to a beautiful young woman? Was I actively turning him off?

My mind flipped back to reality. It didn’t matter anyway, because he wasn’t MY type. I liked tall, handsome gentlemen who were intelligent and kind. Not disgusting fat slobs with no respect for women.

“Well I guess that’s one less thing for me to worry about,” I said, smiling weakly.

Saturday night was my Safe Rides shift again and I was anxious. I prayed not to be called anywhere that Trevor or Johnny would be. The problem was that you never knew until you arrived who was in attendance.

It was getting late, and no calls had come in. I was about to crash when a text came in... “safe ride request... 4579 Lake Ave...”

No, no, no, no no!! That was Trevor Jameson’s house. The last place I’d want to be!! Driving over, I fortified myself for the inevitable harassment. Arriving at his parent’s ostentatious McMansion, I took a deep breath before trepidatiously ringing the bell.

I was greeted by Trevor’s familiar cocky grin.

“Look who couldn’t stay away,” he sneered.

I was prepared for this.

“Just so we’re on the same page, I have absolutely no interest in an over privileged nepo baby who doesn’t care about anything outside of himself,”

The cocky grin remained planted.

“Yes you do,” he taunted.

““No, I don’t,” I shot back.

“Yes you do,”

“For God’s sakes Trevor, no means no!” I screamed, pushing my way past him into the house.

Once inside, I peeked into the different rooms- hoping that whoever needed the ride would approach me.

No such luck. I began to think that this was a fool’s errand.