Dm and the Dirty 20s
Copyright© 2025 by BreaktheBar
Chapter 68
Fantasy Sex Story: Chapter 68 - Shane has been playing 'The Game' for over two decades with his old college friends - D&D, but with sex. Now he's being asked to run 'a normal campaign' for some college coeds. It couldn't possibly happen again, right?
Caution: This Fantasy Sex Story contains strong sexual content, including Ma/Fa Fa/Fa Mult Consensual Romantic Lesbian Heterosexual Fiction High Fantasy Magic Were animal Sharing Light Bond Rough Spanking Group Sex Harem Polygamy/Polyamory Swinging Interracial White Male White Female Indian Female Anal Sex Analingus Cream Pie Exhibitionism Facial Masturbation Oral Sex Petting Sex Toys Squirting Tit-Fucking Voyeurism Big Breasts Slow Violence
“Alright, before we jump back in, I wanted to just cover one thing,” I said once we were all back and sitting at the table. The girls were back in their character costumes, the snack bowl had been refreshed, everyone had new drinks (making me realise I’d definitely relaxed my 1 beer per game night rule for them), and I’d received steamy kisses from both Rhia and Elyse before we sat down.
“Is it something about the ghost cum?” Elyse asked with a big smirk. “Because I’m imagining some Ghostbusters ghost goo issue.”
“No, not that,” I chuckled. “Just about the encounter in general. Obviously, knowing you three, I prepared for the possibility of you seducing the ghosts. But I just want to make sure you girls are aware you did have the ability to fight them - you correctly identified that Renee and her magic had the most tools to try and deal with them, but in my setting there were a couple of other options. Rhia, you were right that your normal sword swinging wouldn’t have been super effective, but using your Smite ability on any hits you made would have made you do holy and divine damage.”
“Oh, fucking d’uh,” she said, facepalming with the heel of her palm into her forehead. “How did I not think of that?”
“And Tori, Jade gets the ability to punch incorporeal things at a later level, I know, but in the future as an FYI, if you use your Ki abilities on an attack, I like to think of that as instilling some of your own spirit energy into the punch or kick, and you could have been dealing damage that way.”
“Cool,” Tori nodded, scribbling down a note on her character sheet.
“I just want you girls to remember that I’m very rarely going to put an enemy in front of you that you can’t attempt to fight,” I said. “They might be really tough, really hard fights, but they are still fightable. The only time I’ll put something in front of you that most of you can barely touch at all will be for narrative purposes.”
“So you’re saying, as long as we’re a little creative, we could punch anything in the face?” Rhia asked.
“Pretty much,” I chuckled.
“Or fuck it,” Elyse smirked.
“That too,” I sighed, rolling my eyes and making the three of them chuckle. “Alright. So-”
As the ghosts released, their rage and lust came out of them in a howl that echoed through the cavern, shaking the stone cairns they were buried under, and as their age-old pent up aggression began to ebb, they slowly dissipated from view, leaving the three adventurers panting in the orange of their guttering torches, sticky with the ectoplasm they had milked from the spectres.
“Well ... that was something,” Jade said, wiping the ghost cum from her face and pulling a strand of it off of her ears.
Renee snorted, then started chuckling.
“What?” Olivia asked, pulling a handkerchief she’d won betting in the bandit ale house out of her pack and wiping off her tits.
“I was just thinking about how much more awkward that would have been if we’d gotten Little Timmy to come down here with us,” Renee snickered. “The kid would be traumatised for life.”
“He might be traumatised anyway,” Jade smirked. “I can’t imagine he didn’t hear that. Those fuckers were loud.”
That got the girls laughing more, and once they’d gotten themselves cleaned up as much as they reasonably could underground and got dressed again, Jade took one of the torches and ran up to the top of the tunnel to tell Timmy Nettles that they weren’t dead. Once she returned, reporting that the kid had been shivering in his boots and demanded proof that Jade wasn’t her own ghost, the Adventurers got down to business.
“Part of me feels like we should check these mounds for anything valuable,” Olivia grimaced, looking around at the five stone cairns. “But those ghosts were naked.”
“And the weapons they had were stone spears and axes,” Jade agreed. “Unless that’s just how they fought, and they actually had some golden empire, we should probably leave them be.”
“On to the ominous dead guy then,” Renee said. The trio converged on the dead Unger, who could have been Duke if he hadn’t decided to come down into the tomb for his own enrichment. The clothes were rotting away, and it looked like he may have been wearing a chain shirt, but it was so torn with gaps and tears that it looked more like a large chain doily. There was some old, desiccated equipment in a leather pack that had managed to resist the wear of the decades so far - a rope, a shattered lantern, and other sundry bits and pieces that one could imagine a noble youth thinking would be useful in a tomb.
There was also a sword, still in its scabbard, but when Olivia pulled on the hilt, it snapped away, the blade rusted into the sheath.
“Strange,” Renee frowned. “Some of his stuff is dried out, and others like it’s been in the damp this whole time.”
“Ghost shit?” Jade guessed.
The other two shrugged.
I made a note to get my continuity right, Elyse having caught me in a loophole of my own making by being overly flowery in my descriptions.
The last thing they took note of was that several of the skeleton’s bones were broken, likely from the same savage attacks that had rent his chain shirt, but his arms were still outstretched towards the door, clawing at the thick seam.
The door itself was their next point of investigation, and it turned out to be Olivia of Parnasus and her urban upbringing that aided their understanding - the carvings on the door were not words that Jade or Renee could decipher or even recognise as any language they’d seen before. But Olivia recognised that they were runes, not magical but of the Trade language, used in the trade houses and caravansaries of the Southlands to quickly denote the goods on a given cart, in a given warehouse or on a ship, and that were for sale in bulk.
“It says something along the lines of ... an empty ship leaving a foreign port, an empty ship arriving at a home port, passenger cargo, cattle cargo, two ... some sort of number or weight? But two of them of silver. The ship leaves the home port, the ship arrives in the foreign port. An empty ship,” Olivia slowly deciphered for them.
I managed not to flinch or facepalm at Rhia reading the note I’d made. ‘2x Silver’ was meant to be Two Silver, but apparently, college kids these days didn’t denote a number of something with an X.
“It’s got to be some sort of riddle, right?” Jade asked the other.
“It must be,” Renee agreed. Then she frowned. “I hate riddles.”
Uh-oh. Hopefully, that was a character moment, and Renee didn’t like riddles, not Elyse. Or she wouldn’t be having fun with the next little part of the dungeon.
It took the Adventurers some time, hashing out amongst themselves the possible meanings, and I was starting to wonder if I should ask them to give me some sort of check to earn a clue, when Elyse threw her hands up in the air.
“Oh my God, we’re dumb,” she declared, then she switched to her Renee voice with the stereotypical French accent. “A boat leaves a distant shore, arrives in the land of the living, people board it, pay 2 silver coins, and ride it back, but don’t return. It is the crossing into the underworld!”
The big stone doors made an echoing boom as something in them triggered, and the adventurers began to cheer as it slowly ground open, revealing a further, stone-worked passage beyond. It led down further into the earth, doubling back upon itself much as the first tunnel did, until they came to a new chamber.
It took Rhia, Tori and Jade a good hour to work their way through the next three puzzles I’d set up, opening more sealed doors. Two of them I’d set up to touch on the backstories of the other characters - Jade was able to recognise the strange series of pictograms depicting people in various poses as a martial katah, and then the girls had to try to do it, in unison. Considering it was a simple Tai Chi starter routine, I hadn’t thought it would be too difficult. Thankfully, most of their errors were caused by giggles, so they had fun with it. The door riddle that Renee was able to bring her particular skills to was an arcane puzzle built into the door - a puzzle that I’d lifted from a videogame where they had to twist five circles stacked on top of each other so the lines on each progressively larger circle lined up to create a specific arcane rune. I’d recreated the puzzle in hard copy using paper and a pushpin; the rune they needed to recreate was on the big fake ‘door’ that was the backing for the puzzle.
It, shockingly, took the girls ten minutes to even realise they could spin the circles on the prop. I really had to talk to Mel about Rhia’s education in basic shit like how to list things, and basic arts and crafts.
The final door was always supposed to be the hardest. I’d decided that since the interred mercenary had been a world traveller, he’d not only learned different forms of navigation, but he’d learned about circumnavigation, and I went about finding several formulae relating to how to figure out the size of the earth, finding the equator and the poles.
Well, apparently they either teach math better these days, or me and all my friends just suck at it, because the girls whipped through that one in five minutes flat.
As the door crashed open with a resounding boom, instead of a stonework corridor as before, the trio found themselves looking out into a torchlit chamber from a balcony. Stone stairs descended the length of the long rectangular room slowly, turning corners at the far end and crossing each other at a landing, then continuing to descend on both sides until presumably ending somewhere below the balcony. The floor of the chamber was far below, at least a sixty-foot fall if they were to jump from their perch, but the space below seemed well-appointed for hosting a small ball. Half the space looked set up as a dance floor, complete with a set of chairs awaiting musicians, while the other half looked ready to present an array of fine desserts, appetisers and drinks on long tables covered in fine linens and platters, except that they all stood empty. In the centre of the floor was a statue, some sort of winged lion sitting regally, facing forward, and behind it on the far wall, positioned under the landing, was a small alcove shrouded in a gauzy black fabric, torches beyond it allowing the sense that a short flight of stairs descended and ended at a doorway.
Renee was the first to speak, and she intoned her incantation to see the magical auras in the world around her before wincing back at the number in the chamber. Each torch dotting the many sconces released an aura of illusion, likely the creation of the light. Another powerful illusion aura sat deeper in the chamber, along with several protective auras, and one general aura that she could not place.
“That room is full of magic, mostly illusion,” she told the others. “The torches aren’t real, and I bet some of that stuff down there isn’t either.”
“Hmm,” Jade said, stepping up to the balcony railing and peering directly over. “Long drop. I think we just ... take the stairs?”
“No point in waiting,” Olivia sighed, hefting her torch and keeping it lit in case the illusion ones suddenly went out as some sort of trap. She picked a direction at random, and her compatriots followed her marching down the long flight of stairs. When they reached the far landing, they paused, looking around but not noticing any changes. The stairs continued as they thought, down beneath the balcony, now half the room above them, but they didn’t just let out onto the carpeted feasting floor, they instead let out onto a small stage.
The three women continued, switching paths and travelling along the same wall instead of looping the entire room, pausing every once in a while for Jade to try and spot any traps, but otherwise reaching the end of the stairs without incident. Olivia hesitated a moment and then stepped down onto the solid marble stage, walking up to the edge of it and peering over at the two-foot drop to the carpet.
Everything at this level in the room looked opulent. The carpet was plush and looked like it had never been stepped on. The linens on the tables were perfect white, unstained, unmarred and crisply folded. The statue of the winged lion was exquisitely detailed. Even the marble of the dance floor gleamed in the torchlight, false or not.
“Give me a minute,” Renee said before Olivia could hop onto the carpet. She began to perform the longer version of her Detect Magic ritual, rather than burning spell power, but after she got about a minute into it, she was cut off.
“You might as well give that up; it will not help you here,” a booming voice echoed through the chamber.
It took the adventurers a long, startled moment to realise that the voice hadn’t just come from somewhere in the room, it came from the centre of the room.
The winged lion statue blinked.
A light coating of dust puffed off of it as it shifted, and then sat up. Its mouth began to move, and again that voice boomed, threatening to disrupt thought and overwhelm senses.
”Who are you, to answer the riddles and come into this sacred place and disturb the rest of a Blessed One?”
“Oh, shit,” Rhia said. “Oh, fuck me. Oh, shit.”
“What?” Tori asked. “What is it?”
“How many doors did we pass through?”
“Four,” Elyse answered her.
“And there’s one more door back there. Oh, fuck me.”
I smiled, trying to keep it small. I’d been wondering if she was going to pick up on things eventually.
“Would you like to share with the class, Rhia?” Tori asked smarmily, putting on a Snotty Teacher voice.
“Five doors, the first four sealed with riddles, and a winged lion guarding the last one,” Rhia said. “It’s always the same thing, and it’s shown up in three different stories from my parents’ campaigns. This is a Sphinx, and he’s guarding something. If we piss him off, we’re all very dead.”
I pursed my lips, smirking a little. Finally, someone got it. A little late in the game, but they got it. Every single time I busted out a Sphinx gauntlet in The Game, everyone around the table somehow magically forgot about the last time I’d done one, and they ended up being sassy or saying something insulting to the Sphinx. And then they had to fight it.
Usually, Sphinx gauntlets were something I used at higher levels, but sometimes it was fun to throw caution to the wind even as a DM.
“So what do we do?” Elyse asked. “Or what can it do?”
“That, my dear, is an excellent question, but also a great example of trying to metagame,” I cut in. “Now that Olivia has recognised this creature as a sphinx, why don’t you guys roll me a History or Arcana check, whichever is better for you, and we’ll see what your characters know.”
The girls rolled, nervous for the results after Rhia’s dire warning.
“Sixteen, Arcana,” Elyse announced.
“Fifteen, History,” Rhia said.
“Dirty Twenty, History,” Jade grinned in relief.
“Alright,” I grinned. “Let’s talk about Sphinxes. Olivia, you’ve at least heard of a sphinx. You know they are some sort of mythical creature, supposedly from down in the Southlands, though as far as you know, there weren’t any in Parnassus. Other than that, you know the basics - they have a thing for riddles and puzzles, they crop up in the stories of heroes at inconvenient times, and they are supposed to be as dangerous as dragons.”
“How dangerous is a dragon?” Elyse asked the table.
“Well, it’s in the name of the game, so...” Tori smirked at her roommate.
“Pretty fucking dangerous,” Rhia grimaced.
“And how big is this sphinx?” Elyse asked me. “As big as a lion?”
“He’s shaped much like a lion, with skin and fur that looks like stone, but he’s about ... think four Escalades long, and two high?”
“Fuck,” Elyse said, trying to imagine the size I’d described. I didn’t want to bust out the map and the minis quite yet to let her see the scale that way.
“Renee, with your sixteen in Arcana, you know the same as Rhia, and you’ve never seen or met someone who has seen one,” I said. “But, when you focus on him, the sphinx seems to emit some sort of aura of power. You’ve met others who use arcane magic before, and it’s sort of like if you look at someone like yourself with while using your Detect Magic spell - you may not see an aura if they aren’t actively casting a spell, holding a magic item or have a spell cast on them, but when you focus there is an element of potential magic. The Sphinx is like that, but you can feel it, and it’s a good thirty-five feet away from you right now.”
“So what you’re saying is that it’s very magic,” Elyse groaned.
“That’s what I’m saying,” I chuckled and nodded. “Now, Jade, with a dirty twenty on history - you know the basics just like Olivia, though you can’t feel its aura since you aren’t attuned to Arcane magic. You also haven’t met one before, or know anyone who has, but you do know more specifics about them from the stories. First, Sphinxes are known to stand guard over important, esoteric locations, the tombs of ancient heroes who consorted with Sphinxes, and the ruins of ancient repositories of knowledge. Second, you know that they have several abilities beyond an understanding of arcane magic - they can fly, their claws and teeth are as dangerous as the sharpest of elven blades, and their roar is said to be so loud that it can not only cause physical injury and fear, but it can also addle the senses. Some stories even claim that they can see both forward and backwards in time, making them extremely difficult to surprise, but also prone to being addled by an overload of possibilities.”
“You do realise we didn’t need to fear this thing any more, right?” Tori asked.
I chuckled and shrugged. “That’s all that comes to mind with a dirty 20,” I said.
The girls took a long five minutes to discuss, out-of-character, what the hell they were going to do. In the end, I cleared my throat and pointed at my watch, reminding them that we were already running long on the session (we’d passed our usual dinner time and were probably into the now-traditional naked hot tub time) and that their characters didn’t have the ability to stop mid-conversation to discuss. Especially within hearing of the Sphinx.
“Fuck it,” Rhia said. “We talk to it. That’s the only thing we can really do. We can’t fight it, and if we run away, then this whole trip was wasted, and we go back empty-handed other than saying we fucked some ghosts. We might have been able to set up a trick or something if we’d known to expect it, but we didn’t, and we’re too low level.”
“Wait, what was the last thing he said, again?” Elyse asked.
I cleared my throat, preparing to put on my ‘booming huge creature’ voice.
”Who are you, to answer the riddles and come into this sacred place and disturb the rest of a Blessed One?”
The three adventurers glanced at each other nervously, and then Olivia stepped forward. “We are champions of the people, Oh Great ... Blessed One? We’ve come hoping to find help from the past to fight the evils of the present.”
“Hmph,” the Sphinx harumphed. “I am not the Blessed One, so-called Champion. This is the final resting place of Hastor Unger, Blessed One, the last Speaker of the Sands. What makes you think that his past may enlighten your present?”
Renee cleared her throat, stepping up next to Olivia to address the immense creature. “We hope, Guardian. Hastor Unger’s history has been hidden from even his own bloodline. One of them lies above, dead at the hands of the ancient spirits interned above, which was enough to convince the family to forget this hero.”
”We know nothing of his deeds,” Jade added. “We don’t even know if he was a hero or a despot, though we’d be willing to learn who he was and bring the knowledge and story back to his kin. What we really need, though, are any magical weapons, armour or tools he might have been buried with. We fight an enemy who can withstand our blows, heal from all wounds, and who has rallied an army of criminals to depose Hastor Unger’s Great- ... Great-Niece? One or two Greats, anyways.”
I hated it when a party I was DMing for tended to try and all talk and get in what they thought was important, all at once. It made the conversation feel a lot more clunky to me. It also happened in every game I’d ever run, and still did in The Game even though we’d had conversations about it over the two decades we’d played together. Gamers were just gonna Game, sometimes.
”You ... hope,” the Sphinx growled. “You come in ignorance, but with hope, to steal from one of the finest heroes of the age, though few of this world would know him for it. Tell me, ‘Champions,’ do you feel you have earned his arms? His armour?”
“Tell us how he became the last Speaker of the Sands,” Renee said. “And then we will know if we might be worthy.”
The Sphinx released a noise that made the marble stage that the three women were standing on shake, like it was about to shatter into pieces, and all three of them tensed again before they realised the immense cat-creature was purring.
“I think he likes it when we pick up on details,” Elyse whispered to Tori and Rhia.
“Or ask good questions,” Tori grinned at her roommate.
“Hastor, once called the Steel Prince, was travelling across the sands of the Thumian Desert, once called the Sea of Lost Sorrows by the Carthians, and the Wastes of Tirell before them by the Six Cities of Splendours. This was a risk for the Steel Prince, a necessary gamble, as he had become cut off from his mercenary company through black treachery worthy of a tale all its own. With time pressing on his conscience, still he paused when he found the steeple of the Temple of Obstinance protruding from the sands of the desert. He forced his way into the steeple and fought his way through the thirty-three levels of the ancient temple, facing the worst fears his mind could imagine, the living mind of the Dark of a Moonless Sky, and finally discovered the heart of the temple where the Avatar of Obstinance had sat in furore for six millennia.