Chapter 4

Matters with Kate were tense following the Sunday blowup. In fact, as I reflected on the events I realized that I was the guilty party. I didn’t feel at all guilty about fucking Tony. No. That felt wonderful and I wanted more and more of him. But I did feel guilty about letting him stay over knowing that Kate would see him on her return from the sleepover and that would lead to the exact confrontation that had occurred.

If I had been a different kind of Mom – less prudent and prudish – Kate might have readily accepted me having a sleepover on my own as well. But here I was, the “good girl” who had preached abstinence and modesty to Kate from the time she hit puberty, practically flaunting my sexuality in her face. And even though it wasn’t intended, fucking with the door open where she could see everything was even more extreme. For all she knew, I had wanted her to see me actually fucking Tony. She blew up because I was a hypocrite, literally not practicing what I preached to her. I could hardly look Kate in the eye Sunday night from all the guilt I felt.

I resolved to again become the good girl I knew deep down I still was. Of course, I would fuck Tony, that wouldn’t stop, for sure. But on our Wednesday night art museum date, he would be limited to a good night kiss in his car, before I walked alone to my front door. (OK. Maybe a blow job in the car, a man does need some relief).

That was my “First Corollary to my Rule for Dating as a Single Mom with a Teenage Daughter” – keep the sex in the car when the daughter is home. Maybe I should write a book “Sex and the Single Mom” getting the message out to all those other single moms like me who wrestled with these issues. I felt I had the situation under control.

But I didn’t count on Tony’s effect on me when he was around. That became clear when he picked me up for our Wednesday night art museum lecture. Kate was home and knew I was going out. I told her not to wait up for me since Thursday was a school day, and she rolled her eyes again at me, as if she knew what was going to happen.

On his entrance into my living room, Tony pulled me to him and kissed me in front of Kate. I responded by kissing him back. Kate said she had homework to finish and turned an left without saying goodbye to me.

Ouch! I felt condemned by my daughter’s silence.

When Kate was upstairs, Tony kissed me again, even more passionately. I put my arms over the back of his head and leaned into his kiss. His tongue entered my mouth and his hand cupped my breast, and I felt again enveloped in his powerful arms. I wanted to get out of the house before Kate came back downstairs for a drink or something and found us making out on the living room couch. So, with all the strength of will I could muster, I broke off the kiss and said that we had to be going to get to the museum on time.

The lecture was well attended for a mid-week lecture on Victorian era English painters – maybe 20 people were in attendance. Afterwards, Tony and I went out for dessert and coffee before heading back home. I had suggested the detour for dessert because I wanted to be sure that Kate was asleep before Tony and I arrived back in front of my house. But when we arrived, Kate’s light was still on in her bedroom.

I told Tony that I didn’t want him sleeping over that night, and we could say our goodbyes in the car before I walked up to my door. I explained that Kate and I were already on tender hooks from Sunday and I didn’t want another argument with her.

Tony pulled me to him and we started kissing. I reached over to unzip him. I felt like a teenager myself making out in the car while Mom and Dad were inside. I really was a virgin when I graduated high school, but I had lots of practice jerking off and blowing boys in cars and getting felt up and even my pussy fondled in return. I didn’t let a boy go down on me though. A good girl does have her limits.