Chapter 7: North and Carolina

A year passed with all involved settled in a comfortable equilibrium: six Baileys, three Soares, and two Santos in two houses of three bedrooms each. The most uncomfortable situation was Abel’s; he was sleeping in the living room of the house that used to belong to Bea Soares.

But change was coming. First, Carolina’s absences were occasional, progressing to weekly. She was spending her evenings away from home and asking Abel to be responsible for Fernanda, Diego, and Danilo. Of course, Nan was the same age as Abel and didn’t need supervision. But the boys, verging on 11, were often rowdy and disrespectful towards Abel, even though he couldn’t do enough to corral or control them.

Finally, Abel reached his limit.

“Nan, this isn’t working, and you know why. I’m going to take my sleeping bag and get away from all this. I’m tired, I’m not sleeping, and I should be studying for the SATs so I can go to college. Just tell my mother why I left.”

“But, Abel, what—”

“Don’t worry. It’ll be fine. I’ll see you at school on Monday.”

Tired of talking, he walked through the connecting door into the garage, pulled his sleeping bag and a plastic ground sheet from the shelves, and walked away. It was 8 o’clock, and he was out of sight after 20 – 30 paces, as their neighborhood did not have many street lights and the moon had not yet risen.

Diego wandered into the kitchen about 25 minutes later.

“Where’s Abel?”

“He left. You little shits have driven him away. Get out of my sight!”

The boy had never seen this kind of expression on his sister’s face. Alarmed, he grabbed his twin, pulled him into their bedroom, and shut the door.

Later, Carolina walked into the kitchen in a happy mood following another excellent date with her new boyfriend, Peter North. But that mood evaporated when she found Fernanda in the kitchen nursing a cup of hot cocoa, and looking up at her with a stricken, tear-stained face.

“Abel’s gone; he left!”

“He left? Where did he go? Why? What happened?”

“Those two little assholes finally got to him, and he snapped. Instead of losing control and hurting them, he decided to leave. He took his sleeping bag and walked away about an hour and a half ago.”

“Because they were being little brats?”

“Yes. And when I called Leah, I found out that he didn’t go stay with the Baileys. He just disappeared. He’s probably out in the woods somewhere where he can be alone and get some sleep.”

“Sleep? He hasn’t been sleeping?”

“Carolina, he’s your son, and you don’t know what’s going on with him. He’s been your unpaid babysitter while you’re out on dates. Have you thought about that?

“I’m so worried about Abel, and I don’t know what to tell Val. She would be crying her eyes out if she knew he had gone off alone in a night like this. There’s nothing we can do for Abel tonight. In the morning, I’m going to the Baileys. You stay here with the two monsters in case he walks back home.

“Val and I will go out into the woods and look for him. I think we will be able to convince him to stay with the Baileys instead of out in the woods. After that, it will be on YOU to fix your relationship. There are already too many orphans among us.”

“Orphan? He’s not an orphan!”

“If he cuts off ties with you, he will be. Abel’s convinced you don’t care about him anymore. Oh, I see hearing this stings you. It should. When I lost my mother, my world crumbled. You know about my father; he’s not involved.

“What about Abel’s father? Val would be bereft, but maybe he could go to a loving home with his dad.”

“No, his father died when Abel was just a toddler. And his family blamed me, unjustly, for his death. They refused to have anything to do with Abel or with me. Abel and I have to reconcile; there’s no alternative.”

“Then you know what you have to do. That is, if we can get him to stay at Val’s house.”

“Fernanda! Come in, what’s going on?” Leah had a bad feeling.

“Abel didn’t come here and he didn’t come home, yes? Was he outside in the cold weather all night?”

“Yes, but when he left he did take a sleeping bag.”

Val, standing in the doorway, heard all of this. She cried out, fearing for his safety. Nan explained briefly what had happened.

“Val!” Leah interjected. “Get a hold of yourself! Go get dressed to stay warm and dry out there. Put on your boots. While you’re getting ready, I’m making a thermos of hot cocoa for you to take to him.”

While making the cocoa, Leah said, “I guess he’s in that place in the forest you guys go to. I don’t know exactly where it is, but I have found pine needles on Ted’s clothes, Nan. At least you and Val are on birth control now. OK, here you go, put this cocoa in your backpack, Val.”

Grim-faced, the two young women set off down the familiar path into the grove of pines. At the glade, they stopped to look around carefully.

“He’s not here! Oh, no!”

Val started crying again.

“He could be anywhere, out in the cold, no food or water. All because his mother, damn her, was taking him for granted! I just want to slap her. What did your brothers do to my boyfriend?”

“It wasn’t any one thing, it built up over time. He felt taken advantage of by Carolina. I mean, think about when your parents were still alive. Did you always treat them fairly?”

“Oh, that’s tough to admit, but I get your point. I know sometimes I was a little shit to them, and to my siblings. Since they’re gone now, I feel differently. It chafes me sometimes, but Leah and Andrew do treat me pretty well, and I don’t feel like I can disrespect them since they are the only adults left in my life.”

“Unfortunately, all this reflection isn’t helping us find Abel. We got to promise him he won’t need to hide in the wilderness just to get away from his mother and my brothers. She can damn well hire somebody to watch those two little shitheads while she’s out on dates.

“You got that right,” said Abel as he emerged from the trees into the glade.

“A—” was all that Val could get out before she collided with him, her arms wrapped tightly around his torso.

Nan put her hand on his shoulder while Val squeezed him. After about thirty seconds, she moved her hand to Val’s shoulder.

“Val, Val, let him breathe. C’mon, loosen up, it’s OK, we’ve got him now.”

She finally released him, then fixed her eyes on his.

“Don’t you EVER scare me like that again, Abel. What were you thinking? Never mind; I’m happy to be with you. I have some warm cocoa, and then you’re coming back to my place.

“We’re going to resolve this situation so you can get back to enjoying life and being my happy and loving boyfriend. OK? Mnph!”

She plastered him with the first of many kisses, interrupted only by his sips of cocoa.

The dispute between Abel and Carolina turned out to be easily resolved. When she had a date with Peter, Diego and Danilo would be packed off for an overnight with Tim Bailey. Just being in a different home seemed to improve their behavior enough that they remained welcome guests at the Bailey house. The twins also were added playmates for Nia, being the same general age as her and her brother Tim.

After a couple months, Carolina approached her son with a question.

“Abel, I’m starting to have strong feelings about Peter. Can I ask you to meet him?”

“Tell me, does he treat you well? Is he kind, or is he kind of mean?”

“Oh, he’s never been mean to me. I have seen him explode, though, when a drunk driver backed into his car and crushed the radiator. The guy was so drunk that when he got out of his car he vomited on Peter’s shoes and suit pants.”

“I think that would be justifiable homicide. So, if you feel secure with him, I’ll be fine meeting him. He can take us to lunch on Saturday, OK?”

The lunch was a big success, and Abel was reassured that Peter would be a positive force in their lives. Another point in his favor: he had a son, Jared, 18, who he clearly doted on.

“My son has been partly raised by my ex-wife, Lorelei, and her wife, Sandra, since we divorced eight years ago. We have joint custody and Jared goes back and forth freely between our homes.”

“Let me guess,” interjected Carolina. “Where he goes depends on who has the most food in their fridge.”

“Mom!”

“The scary thing is, she’s right. The kid eats like 8,000 calories a day but doesn’t gain weight. It’s a medical miracle!”

“Speaking of mouths to feed, has my mother explained how many children she’s raising besides me?”

“You mean, you plus Fernanda plus Diego plus Danilo? I know. It doesn’t faze me. The twins aren’t yet in high school, but the rest of you will be off to college fairly soon. And, you and Nan have plenty of college funds, I understand.

“But, leaving that to the side, I have lots of money. As a corporate lawyer, and my annual salary is over 200. Um, 200 thousand, that is. Sandra is a doctor, so I don’t pay alimony to Lorelei, just an allocation to support Jared.”

“So, you’re giving me all the right answers, showing that you are a good match for my mom. So, only one more question: did your first wife turn to lesbianism because you are lousy in bed?”

“WHAT?” screeched Carolina.

“I’m kidding! I’m kidding! Sorry, Mom. Sorry, Peter. Obviously, that’s not how orientation works, I know. What I just confirmed is that Peter isn’t going to choke the life out of me for being so rude.

“It’s not for me to say, of course, but I hereby give my permission to you, Peter, to marry Carolina. You may kiss the bride.”

And that’s what Peter did.

Nine weeks after that kiss, Carolina Santos married Peter North in a civil ceremony. There were many participants and guests, starting with Abel (who “gave away” Carolina), Fernanda, Diego, and Danilo. Also present were Jared, Lorelei, and Sandra, and all six of the Baileys (Andrew, Leah, Theodore, Valerie, Timothy, and Tania).

“So you are keeping your name, Carolina?” asked Sandra.

“I’m not going to spend my life explaining myself to idiots who say I’m ‘out-of-order’ being Carolina North instead of North Carolina. People are annoying and stupid this way. The Baileys have had problems forever because of that old TV show.”

“TV Show?”

“Yeah, The Brady Bunch. Three boys and three girls.”

“Oh, I see. Ever heard of Sandra Day O’Connor?”

“On the US Supreme Court? Sure.”

“My name is Sandra Dee O’Connor. I was named after the actress Sandra Dee. The rest of the bullshit came later. At least you have a choice.”