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Author's Description:
Meet Jack, who we soon discover has an unusual talent for a young man, this is a story about his life growing up. There are ten chapters which give the background on his young age, but the book really starts when he hits high school. The title of the book will become apparent the more you read. The main book will be over forty chapters. My thanks to John Fullmer for editing the main story, to make it a better read.
Size: 670 KB (133,192 words)
Genre: Coming of Age
Sex Contents: No Sex
Tags: Fiction, School, Sports

Review by manddscott   [other reviews by manddscott]

Reviewed:


I love coming of age stories, and I really enjoyed the fact that this author made it a point to show that the MC was different from the point of birth. The MC in this is truly a Renaissance Man (even though he is not even a teen for the bulk of this story). He is not only extremely advanced in intellectual pursuits, but is also into sports, analysis, automotive restoration, and a plethora of other pursuits with the possible exception of art.

For plot, I give the story a C (6) so far. I don't mind a story that stretches the bounds of credibility. To start with $20,000 and build it into a portfolio worth half a billion dollars in 6 years is one of those ways of stretching the bounds. I actually have less issues with that than with some other things. The problem in this case is that the author writes about some things that they are clearly unfamiliar with, and have not taken the time to research. Perhaps the story takes place in an alternate universe where the rules of baseball are drastically different and the home team does not always automatically bat in the bottom of the inning.

For technical score, the story gets a D (5). Don't get me wrong, there is a lot of promise in the story and the ideas behind it. The problem is the massive amount of errors in the story. There were several points at which I felt like nails were scratching across a blackboard because of the constant mistakes. Most of them were homophonic errors (to/too, their/there/they're, coach's/coaches, etc) but some were simply technical terms which were misapplied, such as stating that a batter got a hit but did not reach base. They may have popped up or grounded out, but the most they did if they never made it to first base safe was to make contact with the pitch. In one scene, the author describes a runner frantically sliding into first base. This is something a baseball player would never do when running from the batter's box.

For appeal, another C (6). Frankly, it would have gotten a much better appeal score if the technical issues were addressed. This story cries out for a good editor. A good editor would not only correct the grammatical and spelling errors that abound, but would also address the procedural errors in sports. That would likely raise the scores to at least B (7), and possibly A(8) or better across the board.

Plot: 6 | Technical Quality: 5 | Appeal to Reviewer: 6
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