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Help me find a harem/polygamy I might like

Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

So I like harem and polygamy stories but there's always stuff in that type of stories I find here on SOL that leave dissatisfied after reading. Like how John Wales tend to kill off love interests. Or how Joe J's characters take lovers that they don't love and let them go when they find someone else, or even playing matchmaker themselves to set up their lovers with others. Or how FantasyLover tend to ignore almost any characterization in favor of world building. Or how Arlene & Jeff has a really unhealthy focus on side characters (and yes weddings in general, but I feel that the weddings would decrease alot if the focus stayed with the main characters).

These authors and stories are good for the most part, but they have these things that leave me dissatisfied.

Those are the biggest harem/poly authors I've found here, but others here have generally some of the above faults, or they go into polyamory.

What I'm looking for is a straight up harem or polygamy story. Where a guy is in a relationship with multiple women, with emphasis on relationship, not just having multiple women as temporary lovers and then they're off to find their true love, not having an open relationship or polyamory. Imagine a normal romance story, but have multiple women instead of just one. MC should be heartbroken if one of them leave, just as he would if she were his only one. MC should be pissed and heartbroken if one of his women sleep with an other guy, just like he would if she were his only one. Not be like, "oh well, I'm with more than one woman, fair play I guess.", fair play or not I want the MC to care about each woman in his relationship just like he would if they were in a monogamous relationship.

My favourite story that fit in best (as far as I recall anyway) is A Friend in Need by Heathen57. I'm following Three Square Meals by Teffler aswell and it's alright, but it's slow on the updates now that I'm caught up. I've already read colt45's stuff aswell. The Best of Both Worlds by Dilettante was good too.

Oh, and also, no Mind Control or purely stroke material please. I don't mind if there's alot of sex, but there should be a story there that's about more than gathering women to bang.

Ernest Bywater ๐Ÿšซ

Here's some you may wish to look at. Some involve graphic descriptions while some don't due to a higher focus on the plot and action in the story.

with sex

https://storiesonline.net/s/52293/new-slaves

https://storiesonline.net/s/52276/power-tool

https://storiesonline.net/s/54159/rob-remembers

https://storiesonline.net/s/15563/eds-new-life
(older store not my best work)

little or no sex as part of the overall story:

https://storiesonline.net/s/11363/mack-coming-of-age-story

https://storiesonline.net/s/16691/boone-the-early-years

https://storiesonline.net/s/59645/rough-diamond

https://storiesonline.net/s/66183/finding-home

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ

@Ernest Bywater

Here's some you may wish to look at. Some involve graphic descriptions while some don't due to a higher focus on the plot and action in the story.

Thanks for the suggestions, I've got Power Tool bookmarked since earlier, so I'll start off with that one and check out your other stuff if I like it.

darrok ๐Ÿšซ

Living Next Door to Heaven

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ

@darrok

Living Next Door to Heaven

That's one of the stories that's polyamory, where multiple of the main characters women have other men as sexual partners. Thanks for the suggestion anyway.

Replies:   tippertop
tippertop ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

That's one of the stories that's polyamory, where multiple of the main characters women have other men as sexual partners. Thanks for the suggestion anyway.

Thank you for the warning. I was about to read this one, but I guess I'll have to give it a pass.

Have you tried Flight of the Code Monkey by Kid Wigger? I haven't been keeping up with the latest chapters but from what I remember none of his three wives sleep around with other men.

Michael Loucks ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

If you haven't read my series, you might give it a try:

A Well-Lived Life

The MC has multiple girlfriends, and they don't go with other guys. It takes a long time for the relationships to stabilize, but I think it might fit your bill.

awnlee jawking ๐Ÿšซ

@Michael Loucks

The MC has multiple girlfriends, and they don't go with other guys.

I don't think that's entirely accurate: most of them end up with other guys. But the best thing @Dractus can do is read the books and make his own mind up.

AJ

FairWeatheredFriend ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Michael Loucks

I have to agree with awnlee.

"The MC has multiple girlfriends, and they don't go with other guys"

is totally wrong for AWLL, elyse proves the point. Long time readers might not see it that way but someone new coming into the story not wanting to read about girlfriends sharing/leaving should be warned properly.

Replies:   Michael Loucks
Michael Loucks ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@FairWeatheredFriend

I have to agree with awnlee.

"The MC has multiple girlfriends, and they don't go with other guys"

is totally wrong for AWLL, elyse proves the point. Long time readers might not see it that way but someone new coming into the story not wanting to read about girlfriends sharing/leaving should be warned properly.

Yes, there is Elyse, and a couple of others, but generally speaking (and we're talking > 100) while they are with the MC, they don't go with other guys until they are no longer with the MC.

Replies:   ChiMi  awnlee jawking
ChiMi ๐Ÿšซ

@Michael Loucks

But you don't understand!!!111eleven

For tippertop and cfuson, every girl that had ever sex with another guy is automatically impure and the whole story is bad. Also, everyone has to be warned about that story.

...

FairWeatheredFriend ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@ChiMi

Quit putting words in my mouth, the op didn't want sharing, swinging and i quote "not just having multiple women as temporary lovers and then they're off to find their true love, not having an open relationship or polyamory". You can try to skirt around the issue all you want but your recommending something that clearly the op doesn't want.

"not just having multiple women as temporary lovers and then they're off to find their true love" Could be said for 90% of the girls in AWLL.

awnlee jawking ๐Ÿšซ

@Michael Loucks

It's still dangerously close to one of the OP's squicks:

Or how Joe J's characters take lovers that they don't love and let them go when they find someone else, or even playing matchmaker themselves to set up their lovers with others.

AJ

tendertouch ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

Lazlong's 'Washed Up' and 'Wagons Ho'.
Brian in the Dark's Dizyntk stories are mostly focused on a family like that.
Cold Creek's 'The Occasional Mind Reader'.
Jay Cantrell's 'The Hillside'
Lumpy's Destiny books, though I suppose you could consider the biological thing to be some form of mind control (I don't.)
Oyster50's 'Mi Vida', though it contains his signature age difference thing.
My 'Building a Better Past'
JimWar's Collapse books
Zaliterr's 'Epigraphy', 'Akkadian Statuette' and 'Hyperactive Alex'

Several of these are just two women but ditto with 'A Friend in Need'

tendertouch ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

One more, Celtic Bard's 'Justice Resurrected'

FairWeatheredFriend ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

You ok with novels on amazon/kindle? if so check out Warlock's Son: An Andrew Moore a 3 part series that has a good harem with no sharing, its only available on kindle unlimited tho.

Replies:   samuelmichaels
samuelmichaels ๐Ÿšซ

@FairWeatheredFriend

You ok with novels on amazon/kindle? if so check out Warlock's Son: An Andrew Moore a 3 part series that has a good harem with no sharing, its only available on kindle unlimited tho.

Hi earlier novels are on Lit, as Magicwrtr.

robberhands ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

You may try my story 'Law of the Blood' and its sequel. The male mc is a rather possessive sort of guy and doesn't like to share or give away any of his lovers ... well, apart from sharing with his sister.

madnige ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

Two that I think fit the requirements, or at least the second does so long as 1+2 is allowed:

Invid Fan's Love Unexpected series

Andrew Wiggin's Death By Fucking

Dinsdale ๐Ÿšซ

https://storiesonline.net/s/65463/daze-in-the-valley seems to fit
https://storiesonline.net/s/72279/the-tales-of-tanitsar would be another candidate
https://storiesonline.net/s/48790/opus-one is one of the best stories on this site.

Eldof ๐Ÿšซ

Thanks for all suggestions so far. I've read some of the stories recommended, and some I've added to my reading list. Amazon and kindle books are fine, already read cfusion001's suggestion though.

L Westron ๐Ÿšซ

If you haven't already read it, try the Valens Legacy series by Jan Stryvant on Amazon/Kindle Unlimited

NoveI ๐Ÿšซ

Prisoner of the Widows its a Joe J story but doesnt have any sharing matchmaking or all that crap. You prob read this.
Harem Building: The Southern California Connection by von_in_your_mind Tho its a dom story and can be a bit too much for many people. CAUTION.
My Son Also Rises [1]: Where Do Babies Come From? by steven seven
My Dear Sweet Slave' by Sage of the Forlorn Path

Nizzgrrl ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

Take a look at Dual Writer's Florida Friends series. That fits the bill. Start with Vacation? Happy reading.

https://storiesonline.net/series/734/florida-friends

FairWeatheredFriend ๐Ÿšซ

@Nizzgrrl

it has swinging and sharing which is something the op doesn't want and if you cant recall the sharing just remember the "hot tub".

sorrowdays127 ๐Ÿšซ

I'm surprised no one had mentioned incestuous harem by mypenname3000 or any of his other series

Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

Have you tried Flight of the Code Monkey by Kid Wigger? I haven't been keeping up with the latest chapters but from what I remember none of his three wives sleep around with other men.

I haven't tried that, as from the story description it seems that there are 2 main characters and I'm not a big fan of multiple PoVs. Like how it's my main gripe in Arlene & Jeff, where there are so many PoVs that just expand the world rather than further the story along. Things like that bore me to tears. I'm not saying that Flight of the Code Monkey is as bad as Arlene & Jeff with this, but with multiple main characters there are generally multiple storylines, and I just prefer to focus on one storyline rather than switching back and forth between multiple.

Replies:   AmigaClone
AmigaClone ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

Personally I think that Flight of the Code Monkey should have been done up to this point as two separate books (one focused on the the planetary MC and the other one focused on the space MC), with the separate books ending when the two MC meet. Their joint adventures would be in a third book.

Replies:   tippertop
tippertop ๐Ÿšซ

@AmigaClone

I have to agree. At one point I just started skipping the cave boy's chapters because they were so boring and seemingly pointless. It could have worked if there had been more characters around other than some wild dog, but I can read only so much survival minutiae before I give up.

richardshagrin ๐Ÿšซ

Most of VeryWellAged stories involve harems of Filipinas.

celebi18 ๐Ÿšซ

@Sl

I have similar taste to literature like you and it is fairly hard to find good stories that fill the requirements.
As for the books that will mostly fit your requirements:

A Guy and His...? by Pars001 (in progress 68 chapters available)
Reprise [1-109][inactive] by eviltwin (really beautiful story the only problem is that it is unfinished and I really doubt it will ever be finished)
Tycoon [1-109][inactive] by Raven Soule (same state as Reprise, the only problem it may stretch some of the requirements but I personally believe you will enjoy it)
I Feel Lucky [1-82][inactive] by cmsix (another unfinished but great story with huge harem (little bit of sharing in the middle but author very quickly realized that is not the way to go))
The Spirit of Anna by mcguy101 (short but worth it)
The Best of Both Worlds by Dilettante (already been recommended but just in case)
Perchance to Dream by FantasyLover (to this one you need to give it a chance and decide on your own)
Deanna and Craft Faire Love by Dr. Paco Jones
Johnny Pulaski by Joe J

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@celebi18

A Guy and His...? by Pars001 (in progress 68 chapters available)

Reprise [1-109][inactive] by eviltwin (really beautiful story the only problem is that it is unfinished and I really doubt it will ever be finished)

Tycoon [1-109][inactive] by Raven Soule (same state as Reprise, the only problem it may stretch some of the requirements but I personally believe you will enjoy it)

I Feel Lucky [1-82][inactive] by cmsix (another unfinished but great story with huge harem (little bit of sharing in the middle but author very quickly realized that is not the way to go))

The Spirit of Anna by mcguy101 (short but worth it)

The Best of Both Worlds by Dilettante (already been recommended but just in case)

Perchance to Dream by FantasyLover (to this one you need to give it a chance and decide on your own)

Deanna and Craft Faire Love by Dr. Paco Jones

Johnny Pulaski by Joe J

I've read (or started reading) all those stories but Reprise, The Spirit of Anna and Perchance to Dream.

I'll check out The Spirit of Anna and Perchance to Dream but I'm not sure about Reprise since in most stories where there's both a father/daughter tag and a brother/sister tag it's some form of sharing where the whole family is involved with each other. Of course this isn't always true since the father and the brother could be the same person. Is this the case here?

Replies:   celebi18
celebi18 ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Eldof

I was not lying when I said I have similar taste as you :-D

In Reprise don't be afraid of that tag, especially in this story sharing/swinging would be impossible as you will find out later to the story.

So go for it. I read the whole story and it good to read although if you are like me later you will just skip some paragraphs :-D but only because author can sometimes take his time.

Also recommendation with grain of salt and outside of the SOL:

pure love โœ• insult Complex (translated on machineslicedbread)

Personally I consider this story as great but you need to push your self through first approx. 50 chapters until the psychology, reasoning and decisions behind the behavior of the character and their actions are explained completely.

However bear in mind that this story is starts DARK and mean very DARK on the other hand it is one greatly written story where every character is though very well thought. As

I wrote give it a chance you may find your self loving it around chapter 70 just bear in mind age of the MC compared to the women in the story

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@celebi18

Also recommendation with grain of salt and outside of the SOL:

pure love โœ• insult Complex (translated on machineslicedbread)

Honestly I DID like Pure Love โœ• Insult Complex, but that was before I started reading stories written in English rather than translated to English. I'm around chapter 380 but every time I go back and try to get into the story again, the quality of the translation just kills it for me. This is true for almost all translated from Asia stories I've gone back to give a try. It's just so rare for a translation to be decent. If it's not grammar, it's format or failure to use better words. Like a translation will say "I got a ride from my younger female cousin to school today", where someone speaking English would just say something like "I got a ride from my cousin to school today". Small changes, but it alters the flow alot since Asian languages have alot of words and expressions that doesn't get used by English speakers so it looks out of place to me in the translations.

But the real deal breaker for me in PLxIC is the abundance of tripple dots (...). I swear, it's got more tripple dots in each chapter than most stories have in total, and it reads really weirdly.

Replies:   celebi18
celebi18 ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

Hmm honestly never that never bothered me.

Since I am not native English speaker, make all the stuff I read to epub and always got too much into the story I tend to overlook or ignore this kind of mistakes.

Personally I got to chapter 336 and now just waiting until more chapters are translated so that I can read it again.

madnige ๐Ÿšซ

Deana Johns' Castle In The Sand anybody?

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@madnige

Deana Johns' Castle In The Sand anybody?

I read the first 10 chapters and it's alright so far. But are you sure the story won't fail my "temporary lovers" criteria? Since the protagonist went out and got a vasectomy and outright told his lover that he did it to make sure they didn't have a future together, that their relationship would be temporary, it made me doubt it. They might end up staying together anyway, but that would require them not ever wanting children, aswell as a complete turnaround of the protagonists personality..

Rambulator ๐Ÿšซ

Castle in the Sand is basically a line marriage like some of Heinlien's books.

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Rambulator

What's a line marriage? Not a native englando speaker, never heard of it before. A google search just redirects me to 'group marriage'. Is that what it is?

an arrangement in which several males live together with several females, forming a conjugal unit

If so, that's pretty much the opposite of what I'm looking for..

newworldencyclopedia says

"Line Marriage" is a form of group marriage in which the family unit continues to add new spouses of both sexes over time so that the marriage does not end.

That sounds an awful lot like sharing with more men, which again, is exactly one of the things I was hoping to avoid when I made this thread.

Or is it something like in Arlene & Jeff where they are all in one 'family' but their own 'units' within the family that doesn't cross over?

Replies:   Ernest Bywater
Ernest Bywater ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

What's a line marriage?

Line marriage is a form of group marriage where they bring younger adults into the marriage so, over the years, there is a wide range of ages within the group - essentially the one family becomes almost immortal as there are several fathers and mothers to look after and raise the children with new young member coming in as the older ones die. Robert Heinlein's The Moon is a Harsh Mistress as a very good description of a line marriage in it. The family is stable because all of the adults have to agree before a new wife or husband is brought into the marriage.

Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

So if it's not a one-man harem in Castle in the Sand, but rather a form of group marriage with multiple men, why did you recommend it here, madnige?

Would you recommend a gay story in a thread asking for a romance without anything gay in it? Any form of sharing between men was one of the few things I said I didn't want, so your suggestion seems to be the exact opposite of what I asked for, if I understood the line marriage thing correctly.

Replies:   madnige
madnige ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Eldof

ETA: TL;DR - CitS is a one-man harem

ETA2: the codes for it are M/f, f/f, M/ff, MF - note the absence of MM

CitS has one male main character with (eventually, or at least) seven female partners (the Eagles song 'Take it Easy' is mentioned); I don't remember any swapping/sharing outside the group, and there's certainly no MM (unless it's just mentioned off screen for some minor characters, don't remember anything like that).

So, as far as MM goes, you're lambasting me for a mistake made by Rambulator, as it's not a line marriage in the form you have assumed, although a line marriage does not imply MM - in Heinlein's Friday there's a line marriage but there's no MM, just MF in combinations from limited sets of M and F.

OTOH, IIRC, some outer members of the CitS harem are allowed/helped/encouraged to find themselves more traditional partners, and these then leave the group. It's a long while since I've read it - some of these are probably the later added members, so yes it would fail that test, but again IIRC he finishes up with the original core members. Those that join and eventually leave are not just casual drift-in, drift-out members, but rather join, heal/grow as a full part of the harem relationship, then leave once they are strong enough to cope outside of it.

Replies:   mcguy101
mcguy101 ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@madnige

OTOH, IIRC, some outer members of the CitS harem are allowed/helped/encouraged to find themselves more traditional partners, and these then leave the group.

From what I recall of the OP's request, this would be a dealbreaker for him concerning CitS. He's not into sharing (at all), kind of once the MC gets a girl the OP doesn't want the MC to lose them.

I'm not into the "sharing" aspect, but don't have a problem with the MC being a caring enough person to allow one or more of his ladies to move on because they want their own man. I've written a couple stories where this happens.

madnige ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

Another one I'll note, at least if you consider two women to be a harem, is Andrew Wiggin's Death By Fucking

Actually, by the letter of your original request, Ascending Author's Deja Vu Ascendancy fits, where the harem consists of Julia, Carol and Nevaeh, although there are multiple additional more casual female partners. I'll leave you to consider if the MC having sex with a female and himself constitutes MMF (and even that happens off screen and only in one chapter), but otherwise the main character is strictly, even rabidly, hetero.

Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

It seems there's been some misunderstandings. First off, I never thought that there was any MM in CitS. Since I asked for harem stories where one point was that it'd only be one man in the harem, and from my understanding there's both multiple men and women in a line marriage. Hence I felt like CitS made as much sense to recommend to me as if someone had made a thread where they ask for a story where gay was excluded (I just picked a tag at random) and someone recommended a gay story anyway. At no point did I think that there was any MM in CitS.

Secondly, what I really don't want is any other men involved with the harem. So if harem members leave I won't drop the story. I don't like it very much, but I can live with it.

What will make me drop a story is if the harem member brings in an other man to the harem, rather than leave the harem herself. So that if she's going for an other guy, she will leave and not stay involved/get her new guy involved with the MCs harem. And a line marriage from my googling does exactly that, brings in other men to the whole relationship. That's why I wasn't sure why you recommended it in the first place, if that was the case.

As for Death by Fucking, I have it bookmarked and will get to it. I tried Deja Vu Ascendancy but I really disliked the whole schizophrenia thing the MC's got going on, so it didn't last many chapters for me.

Rambulator ๐Ÿšซ

The author of Castle in the Sand had a story like what you are looking for, called Alternatives, some of the women come and go in the story. It covers multiple years. The author is Thaumaturge on SOL the story is not on SOL, you might e-mail him and if he still has it he might send it to you.

Replies:   PrincelyGuy
PrincelyGuy ๐Ÿšซ

@Rambulator

Google found a link to the story on ASSTR from the Sennadar site. https://forums.sennadar.com/viewtopic.php?t=777&start=285

If you do not want to read the post; the Sennadar posting had the following text.

If someone wants to read it, there is a copy of "Castle in the Sand" on asstr in the ASSM collection. Starting with: http://www.asstr.org/files/Collections/ ... 2008/57354

Rest of the parts follow in 57355, 57356 ..

https://www.asstr.org/files/Collections/Alt.Sex.Stories.Moderated/Year2008/57354

jimh67 ๐Ÿšซ

I would like to commend the OP for his patience given that so many people are blatantly disregarding his wishes. He clearly and unambiguously stated a very small number of things that he DOES NOT WANT in the stories, yet people keep recommending stories comtaining those very things, sometimes in heavy doses.

Just stop. Please.

seanski1969 ๐Ÿšซ

I seriously wonder if people can read sometimes.

Replies:   Obliterous
Obliterous ๐Ÿšซ

@seanski1969

I seriously wonder if people can read sometimes.

It's not the reading that they have issues with, its the comprehension.

Replies:   Wheezer
Wheezer ๐Ÿšซ

@Obliterous

It's not the reading that they have issues with, its the comprehension.

...combined with a large dose of donotgiveafuck.

celebi18 ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

Sl

Don't bother with Castle in Sand it is good until chapter 60 and then it goes down the hill with sharing.

Quite a disappointment.

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ

@celebi18

Don't bother with Castle in Sand it is good until chapter 60 and then it goes down the hill with sharing.

Quite a disappointment.

Yah, don't worry, after all the other comments here about it I scimmed through the last page before I got to invested in the story, and found out much the same thing. Thanks for your consideration though!

Replies:   celebi18
celebi18 ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

If you hadn't already go for Warlock series from D. R. Rosier on Amazon

Finished first saga and started second and it is worth it.

Rambulator ๐Ÿšซ

Alternatives by the same author is basically what you are looking for. I have it and have permission from author to send it to whoever wants it. I also have all of Deanna Johns old stories,

richardshagrin ๐Ÿšซ

Many of cmsix's stories have harems, particularly the ones where aliens send the hero back into the Cro-Magnon/Neanderthal distant past.

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@richardshagrin

Many of cmsix's stories have harems, particularly the ones where aliens send the hero back into the Cro-Magnon/Neanderthal distant past.

Well I've only tried I Feel Lucky by cmsix and it had sharing. Because of that and because most of his stories are unfinished and inactive, I haven't really tried any of his other stories.

Does anyone know if his stories are finished on other places or why he has so many that isn't finished? I count 39 unfinished stories on his profile and find it kind of odd that he so seldom seems to finish his stories.

Replies:   FSwan
FSwan ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Eldof

SNIP I count 39 unfinished stories on his profile and find it kind of odd that he so seldom seems to finish his stories.

Cmsix seems to have written his tales as in the style of television series. When his health problems took a turn for the worse, he went into a nursing home with poor to no internet access. So, the effect is the series's got canceled before he could write their finales. Though if you read the tales, you'll find they do stop at a natural point. IOW, he has a season's finale rather than a series finale.

NoveI ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

the Cmsix stories that have the aliens sending people back doesnt have any sharing i believe but haven't actually finished the stories. Read quite a bit tho . But they have pretty massive harems. Cuz its the story where you kill a guy you take his wives and people there just loves to try their chance against the glowing stick.

Severusmax ๐Ÿšซ

Deanna and Summer Get Their Man and Embracing Completion are the closest that I get to this, if you don't count sharing with women. I'm not generally a fan of the kind of harem tale that you mentioned, preferring regular poly and open marriage instead, but I respect that you have your preferences and stick firmly to them in the face of so much judgment.

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Severusmax

The biggest reason that I don't like the open marriage and sharing with men is that the protagonists are almost never bisexual. The one reason that a poly relationship could work for more than a casual relationship (in my eyes atleast) is if all in the relationship are in love with each other. This is normally no problem in stories with 1 man and multiple women since almost all women in all stories here are bisexual, so they can fall in love with each other. The men are almost always straight, so they never fall in love with other men that get involved. I have more understanding for bisexual women who can accept a poly relationship because they can be attracted to everyone in it, more than 2 straight males who are only attracted to the women.

To me, I don't think a relationship like that can survive without jealousy. If a man walk in on say his two women having sex, he'll be thinking "aww, look at my lovers having sex", if a woman walk in on her man and woman lover having sex, she'll think "aww, look at my lovers having sex", if a man walk in on an other man in the relationship having sex with one of the women, he'll think "Look at my friend having sex with my lover". I realize that some people might not mind that, but it's a very big distinction to me, his lovers all having sex and his friend and his lovers having sex.

It comes down to that I don't think that a relationship can survive for long if not all the people in it, men and women ALL are in love with each other, so the men'd have to be bisexual. This is not backed by any facts or studies, just my own personal thoughts. Since I myself is straight, I tend to avoid any m/m stories, so that leaves 1 man multiple women stories.

Replies:   madnige  Dicrostonyx
madnige ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

I'm surprised that no-one has yet mentioned Lazlo Zalezac's John Carter (the story, and to a lesser extent the rest of the universe) as the story has polyamory as a major plot point, with it being a requirement of the group marriage that all partners should physically express their love

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ

@madnige

No one probably mentioned it because I expressly asked not to be recommended polyamory or open relationships, but a story with one man and multiple women.

I did say in my last post that I believe that for a group relationship to work, all involved should be in love with each other, not just with the women if there are more than one man.

I also said

Since I myself is straight, I tend to avoid any m/m stories, so that leaves 1 man multiple women stories.

So while I find the relationship in John Carter (judging from what you said and the tags) more likely to survive, it's not something that I'm interested in reading.

Dicrostonyx ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

To me, I don't think a relationship like that can survive without jealousy.

I have friends who are poly. The best description I've heard goes like this:

Although there are lots of different kinds of poly relationship, and this isn't entirely accurate, you can imagine monogamy & polyamory as a spectrum, much the way many people these days think of heterosexuality & gay/lesbian as a spectrum with bisexual in the middle.

Now, there are some people who are entirely poly, they can't really function in monogamous relationships. There are some people who are purely monogamous, they have trouble even conceiving of poly working, or think it's just an excuse to be a swinger or a cheater. Most people who identify as poly are somewhere in the middle.

Using that analogy, trying to explain how ploy works emotionally to someone at the mono end of the scale is like trying to explain being gay to someone who is completely straight. At best they can come to an intellectual/ philosophical understanding that people are different, but when they try to imagine it they can't. They see themselves in that situation and shy away from it.

With polyamory, you're clearly at the mono end of the scale -- or, more accurately, your comment as quoted above represents what would be expected from someone at that end. You can't really see how poly could work for anyone because it doesn't work for you.

There's nothing wrong with that, as long as you can accept, even if only intellectually, that the same is not true for everyone. There really are some people who can love multiple people without jealousy ever being an issue. Sometimes this is one guy with multiple women, but more commonly, in real polyamorous relationships, it's a LOT more complicated than that.

Replies:   PotomacBob  Eldof
PotomacBob ๐Ÿšซ

@Dicrostonyx

Most people who identify as poly are somewhere in the middle.

Is that an opinion or is there some scientific basis for the assertion?

Replies:   Dicrostonyx
Dicrostonyx ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@PotomacBob

Is that an opinion or is there some scientific basis for the assertion?

Neither or both. Sorry, but I'm trying to pick my words very carefully here.

In the paragraph where I used that phrase, I intentionally used two extremes: a person who is 100% monogamous and one who is 100% polyamorous. Although I suggested that poly/mono might be a spectrum, there's no real evidence that it is. I was using that more as a visual aid.

Now, 100% mono appears to be fairly common as it is the default in Western society, although there is some question whether that is biological or social. I have met exactly one person who I would describe as 100% poly: that guy become clinically depressed when not in multiple relationships and has never (willingly) been in a true mono relationship since he was a teenager.

Anecdotally, I've met a number of people who identify as poly but who are willing to be in a mono relationship if their partner is mono and they love that partner enough. Although not exactly correct, I see this as equivalent to a non-poly bisexual. A bisexual can have a relationship with either sex, but is only a relationship with one person at a time; an equivalent person on the poly "spectrum" can be either poly or mono, depending on their partner's identification.

A better term than bisexual or polyamorous might simply be flexible sexuality. Some people are flexible in their choice of gender, some in their choice of number of partners.

It is also worth noting that the term "polyamory" tends to get thrown around to describe several different things. I try not to be a proscriptionist -- if a swinger wants to calls themselves polyamorous, let them -- but as jargon terms open relationships, swinging, polygamy, and polyamory are all different things. Within polyamory, some people define it as a sexual orientation, others as an emotional or relational orientation, and still others as simply a type of relationship structure.

There haven't been a lot of really good scientific studies of polyamory yet; it's still a pretty recent social phenomenon and frankly all of social psychology is a pretty new field. The earliest study I could find referenced in my Human Sexuality textbook (yes, that's a real PSYC class), was from 1995, and the only study the text mentions that didn't look specifically at swingers was from 2015.

Anyone who tells you they have scientific basis for anything to do with polyamory is either lying or cherry-picking data to meet their own theories.

@Sonjer

Sorry, my mistake, you're right. I think we're both saying similar things in different ways. I've been so immersed in this stuff recently that it's sometimes hard to think straight.

If you're interested in any poly studies, I could probably dig up a few references, but I'm not sure how readable they'd be. Psyc papers tend to be short, but dense.

Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Dicrostonyx

With polyamory, you're clearly at the mono end of the scale -- or, more accurately, your comment as quoted above represents what would be expected from someone at that end.

I do agree that I'm definitely entirely monogamous in real life. I know for certain that I couldn't share my partner, wether it's with an other woman or a man. I do find harem stories exciting however. It's much like I wouldn't want to fight for my life in a medieval melee, but I still find stories about grand medieval battles exciting. It can be fun to fantasize about, but I wouldn't want to be put in that situation even if you paid me.

You can't really see how poly could work for anyone because it doesn't work for you.

I don't really agree with that. I know that some people wouldn't have the issues I would, I even said "I realize that some people might not mind". I can definitely see how it can work for others.

There's nothing wrong with that, as long as you can accept, even if only intellectually, that the same is not true for everyone. There really are some people who can love multiple people without jealousy ever being an issue.

I think you must have misunderstood me somewhere, because what I quoted in bold is exactly what I (tried atleast) said. All I said was that I don't believe that a polyamory relationship could survive unless all involved loved each other. So yes, I know that there are people who can love multiple people without jealousy. In fact, what I tried to say earlier was that I believe that just that love was necessary.

What you said was, There really are some people who can love multiple people without jealousy ever being an issue., which I agree with.

What I was saying earlier is that I don't believe a poly relationship could prosper without jealousy if there is NOT love between them all.

If there is a group of people who are all in love with each other, no matter their genders, I believe that they'll do just fine without jealousy and other such issues.

If there is a group where 1 of them is in love with 2 people in the relationship but not with the third, and the third is not in love with the first, but only with the other 2, that's where I think that there might be problems.

Again, these are just my thoughts on the subject, and I haven't read any studies, nor do I know any polyamorous groupings.

I just wanted to clear up that while I myself am definitely mono, I know that a poly lifestyle works for others. When it comes down to it, all I'm saying that I think that for a relationship to prosper, all involved need to be in love with each other, wether they are polyamorous or monogamous doesn't really matter. But like I said, I have no personal experience with poly, so they might not feel like they need to love everyone in their relationship as long as they love someone in it. I don't know. It sounds alien to me, and I think that it has more to do with my attitude towards romance than the fact that I'm monogamous.

Severusmax ๐Ÿšซ

Interesting and relevant point that is often a struggle in the polyamorous context, though not insurmountable. Anyway, those two stories remain probably the closest things that I've ever written to your preference, especially with the polyfidelity and romantic love involved. I'm not saying that they are necessarily my best-written stories, that's another issue entirely, though I think that Deanna And Summer Get Their Man is a bit better than Embracing Completion. I'm just saying that is as close as I come to that kind of story that you prefer.

Replies:   Severusmax
Severusmax ๐Ÿšซ

@Severusmax

Of course, with Deanna and Summer, their history of bisexuality is already established with Deanna And Summer Find Each Other. I flirted with including Troy at one point, but I don't read Brent as bi and I frankly don't think that he would appreciate the man who Summer cheated with being included in their loving triad.

Severusmax ๐Ÿšซ

It also should be noted that I tend to prefer to make my male and female protagonists alike bisexual/pansexual, which has the unfortunate consequence that it squicks some male readers who might otherwise enjoy them, emphasis on might.

FairWeatheredFriend ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

Sorry to hijack you're thread but i recently read A Friend in Need by Heathen57 and was shocked at how realistic the relationship felt, you could see it being something that would happen in the real world.

Are there any other recs like this? A Harem/Threesome situation that feels realistic?

Replies:   Dinsdale
Dinsdale ๐Ÿšซ

@FairWeatheredFriend

https://storiesonline.net/s/48790/opus-one

bubbag ๐Ÿšซ

@Eldof

I just re-read Mayhem 4: irish Mist. A good read and a quirky take on harems.

celebi18 ๐Ÿšซ

Teddy's World by Buick GS

Darian Wolfe ๐Ÿšซ

I would like to suggest my "Freya Cycle" stories as something that may be to your liking. It consists of three short stories that follow the life of Brett Hogan over a several year period as he learns to recover after losing everything that mattered to him. During this time he finds true love not once, but twice, the stories show how he deals with it.

Eldof ๐Ÿšซ

Thanks for the recs, I'm up to date on Endangered.
I haven't read A Master's Ring, since I had heard there was sharing and it's inactive. I've read Zombies, Werewolves, Vampires, and Other Improbable Things and The Wolf Summers. There was sharing in one of those aswell and since 2 out of 3 of his stories I had taken an interest in was featured sharing, I haven't really tried anything else by him. That, and most of his other stories are shorter than what I usually go for. Can you recommend some specific stories of his I might like?

Replies:   Onerglossi
Onerglossi ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Eldof

The Impervious series is good but my only gripe is that the MC gets kind arrogant near the end.

Dungeon Defense is an amazing Korean novel. Though if you have read PLxIC you have probably read that too.

Life With Alpha is a pretty long story with a sequel.

Invisible Empire is another superhero story with a harem.

Building a CAP Based Future is a good Swarm story, though I wish it focused more on the harem in the second part.

I'm infatuated with harem stories but they're usually poorly written, have sharing in them or they have poor to nonexistent character development.

Replies:   Eldof
Eldof ๐Ÿšซ
Updated:

@Onerglossi

The Impervious series is good but my only gripe is that the MC gets kind arrogant near the end.

Dungeon Defense is an amazing Korean novel. Though if you have read PLxIC you have probably read that too.

Life With Alpha is a pretty long story with a sequel.

Invisible Empire is another superhero story with a harem.

Building a CAP Based Future is a good Swarm story, though I wish it focused more on the harem in the second part.

Thanks for the recs. I've read Life With Alpha and Building a CAP Based Future.

I never got around to Dungeon Defense since the description didn't really grip me. Might give it a try.

Isn't there sharing in Invisible Empire? I recall starting reading a story with Extra Sensory Perception, Harem and Prostitution tags that ended up with some sharing and swapping. I'm not sure of the title, I'll try to find out if it's the one I'm thinking of.

**EDIT**

The story I was thinking of wasn't Invisible Empire, it was They That Have Power by hermit.

Also if arrogant MCs is a gripe of yours, you can't have liked Invisible Empire very much unless he turns a new leaf after the first part. I've read the first part now and am hesitant to continue, as the MC wasn't merely arrogant, nor an asshole, but straight up evil. You said it's a superhero story and the MC would make any supervillain proud.. In just the first part of the story which is about 1/7th of it, he's a rapist, child molester, adulterer and abusive of his powers. I find myself hoping that the superhero will show up soon and stop the supervillain that is MC.

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