Forum: Author Hangout

It's limited to Americans so it doesn't really matter - they prefer scatalogical and visual humour to intellectual jousting ;)

Now now, no need to mock the colonials...

Though to prove they are capable of witty repartee, look no further than that between Doc Holliday and Johnny Ringo.

I'm not familiar with it :(

Val Kilmer and Michael Biehn in Tombstone (1993). A most excellent movie. Sadly much of it is in Latin …

Sadly much of it is in Latin …

That's kind of the point.

Witty repartee between two 'cowboys' in Latin, wouldn't be the same if'n they'd a spoke 'merican

Took place in Deadwood, left people dead, they spoke in a dead language.. Apt.

Here's an example of American humor -
For sale: French Battle Rifle, never used, only dropped once.
For sale: French Victory Flag - never used.

Don't go there, that won't end well. That is more Political Showboating than anything else.

The US Victory Flag was last used by Dubya on a battleship near Iraq, we know how that went.
The last time I remember the French losing a war is when they were driven out of Vietnam although them being driven out of North Africa by the Arabs was around the same time.
1870/71, WW1 and WW2 both saw them take on an enemy which was both larger and better armed. They held them off in WW1 - with 55% casualties and help - but were totally outgunned a generation later. A French friend of mine told me that every village and every town had their war-wounded cripples just trying to survive in the interwar period. That made a big impression on the younger generation, especially because a major cause of WW2 was the peace imposed on the Germans+Austro-Hungarians at the end of WW1 - primarily by a French politician.

I remember the French-bashing from the US really taking off when the French tried everything to stop Dubya going into Iraq - remember "Freedom Fries"?

The last time I remember the US genuinely winning a war - and I may have forgotten one - was v Grenada during the Reagan Administration. Iraq 1 sort of counts, as does the bombing of Serbia but both come with qualifiers.

This is not in itself a bad thing, a leader who sends his troops into a war they cannot win without a v-e-r-y good reason has failed. The last set of American troops who had to fight a stronger and better armed enemy was the CSA. Have I missed something?

The last time I remember the US genuinely winning a war - and I may have forgotten one - was v Grenada during the Reagan Administration.

I'd postulate that the U.S. won Iraq 2 and Vietnam, but lost the peace. But since shooting wars are extensions of politics, I guess you can say that, in a sense, neither war was won.

And I don't know if you can call it war when the two sides are so horribly mismatched. Maybe it's fortunate that there are the only ones that have been fought since 1945 since one with evenly matched sides among the super powers is too horrible to contemplate.

The last time I remember the French losing a war is when they were driven out of Vietnam

The real question is when was the last time the French won a war without outside help.

The last set of American troops who had to fight a stronger and better armed enemy was the CSA. Have I missed something?

Yeah, WWI & WWII.

Oh, and no, the Confederate army was never stronger or better armed than the Union Army.

Prior to the succession, the industrial base of the US was almost entirely in the Northern states, The confederate states had almost zero industrial base, making them very vulnerable to blockades of their ports.

The problem was the generals in charge of the Union army in the early part of the war were incompetent idiots.

Umm, I meant the CSA was fighting a stronger and better armed opponent. (secession, not succession!)

I'd argue that US troops were as strong as German troops in WW1 and were tipping the balance in a previous tied situation. In WW2 US troops were better equipped with the Soviets pretty much keeping the Nazis tied down.

As to the French, up until the time of Napoleon they were the dominant force on the European mainland. Part of the German hostility to France came from the way France had trampled all over German territories in earlier times, one of the driving forces towards German unification back around 1870 was to build an entity too large to be beaten up by France. It worked.
I'll stop now, this thread is about witty repartee so to close my contribution off:
A German joke is no laughing matter.
(yes, I've run that quote here before)

In WW2 US troops were better equipped with the Soviets pretty much keeping the Nazis tied down.

I'd argue that the US troops weren't better equipped except maybe for the M1. German weaponry was in many ways superior to what the U.S. had at least in the early days. Say pre P51 Mustang. What the U.S. had, however, was quantity with arming a lot of the Russian war effort as well as the British and their own. Patton was reputed to say that quantity had a quality all it's own. Probably true.

And the Allies did have a secret weapon in the European theatre, i.e. Hitler himself. He couldn't keep his hands off and ended up hamstringing his generals, which probably had much to do with their defeat. Much like the North did in the U.S. Civil War pre Grant, which the South almost won.

In WW2 US troops were better equipped with the Soviets pretty much keeping the Nazis tied down.

Actually, Jim S is right. When you consider that after WWII, the US effectively took the German MG-42 and turned it into the M-60, just with some tweaks. About the only weapon the U.S. had that was superior - and is still in use today - was the M-2. Nothing says loving like a .50.

I'll stop now, this thread is about witty repartee

How long have you been on these forums? They ALWAYS go off track at some point. Seems that the train of thought gets derailed.

Ah yes, but when they venture into politics it tends to get nasty :(

Politics got banned from the forum. (Thankfully) So if you want to 'do the nasty' you need to stick to sex, grammar or history.

When you consider that after WWII, the US effectively took the German MG-42 and turned it into the M-60, just with some tweaks.

We did something similar with the Messerschmidtt ME-262 for our first jet fighter. Although ours was a lot safer, i.e. not killing as many pilots. But then Germany was facing huge pressures from the war and had to rush it into production, probably before it's time.

What about the boys around the campfire in "Blazing Saddles?"

Might you be confusing eloquence with flatulence ?

What about the boys around the campfire in "Blazing Saddles?"

No females in that group. Lili Von Shtupp didn't come in until later I believe.

ETA: I still laugh every time I watch that movie. How Slim Pickens didn't score an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor is a true crime of filmdom.

No females in that group. Lili Von Shtupp didn't come in until later I believe.

She didn't come at all... She was too tired.