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I did a full re-edit on the first three chapters and I think got most of the problems fixed. I suspect an English teacher would still chew me up, but hey, it has been a couple of decades since school.
William had just refilled his water bags when he heard the sounds of another patrol entering the area he and Tamalain had settled in while she got her head back together. He quickly returned to cover her and himself in his cloak, but was surprised to find her standing, and looking in the direction of the wandering patrol. She saw him and smiled, then vanished from sight. He heard a faint rustling of cloth and then screams as the Orcs met something deadlier than themselves.
Enjoy.
Well, it took me long enough. Chapter one is on the way and Chapter Two only needs one more major going over. Chapter Three is rough completed and needs fine tuning. Four in started, but not far along yet. I can't guarantee weekly posting right now, but I will try to keep the delays short. Enjoy.
Oh yes, please let me know what you think. I grumble, but I don't bite, much.
The next story in the Tamalain series is coming along nicely. Still a ways off, but coming along. I am glad I am a fanatical backer upper on a daily basis as far as my writings go. my laptop died a sad death of worn out HD, but I store each update after writing on an external drive and my nook. I get a lot writing done on that little thing, though the BT keyboard I bought has quit now too. I will keep writing and someday soon, "Traitors Crown" will start being posted
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