Sage Mullins: Blog

Dare I ask for ... a do-over? Yes, I'm about to do just that.

A couple of readers felt that the ending of chapter 49, where Pat and Dave made a few wisecracks at the expense of Paul and his new girlfriend, came across as harsh and mean-spirited. Believe it or not, what got posted there was actually a toned-down version of that little exchange. When I read through the initial version, it did indeed seem a little mean to me, so I dialed it down a notch before I put it up on the site.

There's one thing that, as a writer, I'm still coming to terms with. I know what's going to happen next in the story, and the reader doesn't. This was one instance where I allowed my own "pre-knowledge" (if you will) to influence my writing. So, what I'd like to do is this. I plan to do a re-write of that last part of chapter 49. It won't be a major overhaul; I don't intend to remove the wisecracks. What I'll do instead is provide a little more context (which is never a bad thing). This will serve to lengthen chapter 49 a little (also never a bad thing).

It's normal for 21-year-olds, even the recycled Pat and the new and improved Dave, to make good-natured comments of this type about friends. I guess what I was trying to do is indicate that Pat and Dave, even though they both are quite different now, still have the same wacky chemistry they showed back at the beginning of the story.

Look for the re-write to be up in a few days, and I'll make another blog post at that time.

I'm a bit of a statistics nut. I was looking at the chapter-by-chapter download figures for LiaB, and they actually support something I've long suspected. I believe I did lose some readers as a result of Pat's "dark period" in Chapters 21, 22, and 23. Except for the recently posted Chapters 47 and 48, Chapter 23 is the least-downloaded chapter in the entire story, by a healthy margin. The download numbers rebound somewhat starting with Chapter 24, but never reach the level of the chapters before 21. Enough time has gone by for the comparison to be valid, and it looks like some readers did fly the coop.

My own take on the situation - and the reason behind the "dark period" - was that a character such as Pat, who wasn't crazy about going back in time in the first place, would have to go through a bit of a funk in order to fully appreciate the opportunity he'd been given in being allowed to re-live his life. I theorized earlier in this blog that many of us would probably mess things up to some extent if given a do-over in actuality. Most time-travel stories depict a character who far out-performs the first incarnation of him/herself, and perhaps there's a reason for that. Maybe my scenario is more realistic, but this is, after all, fiction. The point is for the story to be engaging, and realistic and engaging are not necessarily one and the same. As a writer, I'm still grappling with that issue.

Hopefully, those of you who stuck with the story after Chapter 23 (and thanks for doing so) understand now what I was trying to do. I also hope that the readers who gave up on the story back then eventually decide to come back and continue onward.

On another note: Chapter 49 is complete. It's in the hands of my editors, and will be posted very soon.

Chapter 48 of LiaB is complete, has been sent to my editors and should be up on the site in the very near future.

On another note, one of my editors pointed out this link to me: http://youtu.be/hRMRCeQBAKI

It has 38 common grammar tips, some of which are very basic, but some that deal with very common grammatical errors.

Just a couple of notes about the recently-posted Chapter 47. A few readers expressed confusion about the trip to Florida that was Inez's Christmas gift to Pat. That "gift trip" was not the same one that was described later in chapter 47. There are two different Florida visits involved here. The first one was brought up in chapter 46, and was a simple holiday visit. That's the one you read about in the just-posted chapter. The second one - the "gift trip" - will take place a few months from the current point in the story, in March. That's the one where they'll be flying into Tampa, and out of Miami.

I can understand the confusion surrounding this, and I hope I've cleared it up.

On another note, a couple of readers have mentioned the similarity between the clam shell scene in Chapter 47 and another seashell scene in the novel "Gift from the Sea" by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. I've actually never read "Gift from the Sea", so this is a complete coincidence. After glancing over the chapter in question in "Gift from the Sea", I have to agree, it's an uncanny resemblance, right down to the relationship analogy which Inez mentioned in my story. I've done a slight edit on chapter 47, adding a few lines where Inez mentions having read that particular book.

Anyway ... onward to chapter 48!

Over the past seven to ten days, I've been working harder on "Lightning in a Bottle" than I have in some time.

So, you're probably saying, "That's all well and good, Sage, but where the hell is Chapter 47?"

Answer: I received some inspiration about a scene I have planned for later in the story, and decided to strike while the iron was hot. With the scene hot in my mind, I decided to jump ahead and write up a draft.

Now, I've redirected my efforts back to chapter 47, and I'll get it posted as soon as possible. The flip side of all this is when I do reach that later point in the story, I'll be able to post one or two chapters much quicker than usual.