First, my dad, then my grandpa and grandma ... and this past year my mom died. Suddenly, I was alone.
Alone in this big house ... All by myself!
Actually, I had an older sister who lives in the same town, only 35 minutes away.
Alone in the four-bedroom home I sometimes find myself rattling around the place.
I'm 19, and my name is Robert. My sister lives on the other side of town ... her name is Sarah.
She's not married or anything. She just lives right by the college she's been attending for what seems like 10 years now.
She's only 23, so I guess it's been five years.
And now I'm alone. All the in-laws and out-laws live hundreds miles away or farther. I was left the big house in my parents will.
I drive dad's three-year-old Infinity, and I'm plush with money. I don't ever need to work again.
Most of my high school buddies moved out of town completely to go to college somewhere far away from their parents.
I could have done that if I had wanted to ... I got good enough grades. I've been depressed since the accident and all the services and the hospital visits. I just wanted to be alone.
Even though my friends explained that the song is all about masturbation right now I feel like the lyrics of that song, 'All By Myself.'
Thinking about it for a while, I decided to download the song on my iPhone. After listening to it a couple of times through, I started singing it and started to cry.
"When I was young, I never needed anyone and making love was just for fun ... Those days are gone!
Living alone, I think of all the friends I've known, but when I dialed the telephone ... Nobody's home?
My sister called. After I picked up, she said, with way too much enthusiasm, "Hey Robby!"
I normally don't like the nickname Robby or Rob, Bob, Bobby. I like the full and complete name Robert, but I never could get my big sister to stop calling me that.
I did my best to speak up energized and uplifting like she had, I responded "Sis."
"Just thought I should call and check up on you," she said.
"You don't need to do that ... I'm 19, a big boy ... I wear big boy pants and everything," I sarcastically remarked.
"So, get off your big boy butt and do something about it!"
"Who do you think you are speaking to the Lord of this Manor like that?"
I heard a hard knock on the front door. I went to open it up and saw her. "Because I'm your older sister asshole, and I can still whoop your ass if I had to," she said with a smile on her pretty face.
She's going all ghetto now?
She came through the door threw her phone in the chair and surprisingly pushed me backwards onto the sofa.
I forgot to mention that she was as strong as any guy either of us would ever meet.
Picking myself up after being tossed six feet, I said to her "Yeah, you know I won't fight you because you're a girl."
Her words came quick, "You won't fight me because you're a pussy."
"Sarah that's not very nice you know. Mom would have ... Damn it... " I broke down into tears.
She started towards me possibly for comfort, but I waived her off. I wiped my tears away and said, "Sis, sit down ... I've got something I'd like to talk to you about."
"Sure. It sounds serious!"
"I ... guess it is."
We both sat down, but nothing was said for over a minute before she gave me a look.
"Sarah, how would you feel if I sold this place?"
She looked like she was going to say something, but then I saw emotion in her face, a lot of it!
"You're that lonely, Robbie?"
"Yeah I really am," I said starting to cry again.
A smile came across her face. "I've got an idea!" she said.
Scooting over to sit right next to me, she asked, "Why don't we find a place ... to live together? You can sell this place. I can move out of my apartment. We both could have plenty of space for us to subsist, and we might finally see each other from time to time. We are still family!"
"I don't know anything about getting this place ready to sell?" I responded.
"Since we have all this money to spend," she said. "We could get some cleaning ladies to come over and clean up the place ... strip off all the beds ... box up all the stuff for us."
"Can we get dad's real estate guy to come in and put it on the market?" I asked.
"That's a good idea Robby," she remarked.
"Would you go to dinner with me tonight?" I asked.
The smile she had her face was kind of cute. "Is my little brother asking me out on a date?"
"Is that a yes or no?" I questioned.
She gave me a big hug. "That ... is a yes! Get a haircut!
Her ... Sarah Jean Whitman, 23, 5ft6, maybe 130lbs - with blue eyes, natural blonde, 34D – 24 – 32, best guess. She looks similar to the actress Jenny McCarthy except a thinner waist, and prettier eyes. She also reminds me of Mom every time I see her. She always wears rather conservative clothing.
Me ... Robert Michael Whitman, 19, 6ft tall, 164lbs brown eyes and dark-brown hair. I needed a haircut. Dad's oldest friends have told me that I look just like him. I also have been told that I look like the actor Keanu Reeves. I was on the football, baseball, and basketball teams at my high school. I decided to forego college.
It was the day of my 18th birthday that Mom died at the hospital. Less than a year before, she was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma. She was in so much pain I was told that her dying was merciful. The last few weeks I visited her every day hoping for a miracle ... it never came.
We arranged for me to pick up Sarah for our 'date' as she called it. I needed to get out and see people. Sarah said that I needed to let people know that I hadn't died.
I was just ... alone!
"All by myself... Don't wanna be, all by myself anymore. All by myself... Don't wanna live, all by myself anymore...
Hard to be sure ... Some times I feel so insecure, and love so distant and obscure ... Remains the cure"
I pulled up to Sarah's place. I got out and knocked on the door.
"Coming," her pretty voice came from behind it.
"Hi, Robby!" she said opening the door.
Like I said, she wears conservative clothing, and this was as well, but it was skintight. A black dress with a high collar, long sleeves and hemmed right at the knee. I looked down and saw heels that practically got her up to my height.
I never saw her looking so lovely. When I followed her in, I watched to see if she was braless underneath. There wasn't quite enough jiggle going on, so I decided she had one on.
What? What did I just do? I think I felt something ... something stirring in my loins. Jesus, Robert ... you're getting a hard-on for your sister? You need a psychiatrist, or a girlfriend?
She did look ready to go out. I never told her my plans ... did I even have any plans? I dressed up nice, and she looks good enough to ea ... stop it, Robert!
"Sarah," I said watching her putting on earrings, "You're the only person alive that still calls me 'Robby.' Could I ask ... that you call me Robert at least tonight? I'm living vicariously through my memory of Dad, and he always called me Robert."
"All right ... Robert," she replied with a giggle.
Man! All she did was call me by my Christian name and my dick practically jumped out of my pants. I hoped she didn't notice.
'Get a hold of yourself be a gentleman.' Both Mom and Dad would say that to me whenever I was leaving the house on a date ... be a gentleman you stupid pervert. Man she looks good. I never saw her hair up like that. I had better come up with a nicer place to eat.
"You look fabulous, Sis!" I said to her.
"Thank you ... you're quite handsome yourself Robert. Where are we going?"
"Someplace where I can show the world my beautiful sister Sarah," I replied.
"Pretty smooth ... you've got good genes and manners. You could have got a real date with those moves," she said.
I felt myself blush as I offered her my arm and took her to my car. I opened the door for her and then went to my side and got in.
"How does the Eiffel Tower Restaurant sound?" I asked.
"On the strip? That place is expensive, Robert," she said.
"The way you look it's not nearly good enough, but I can afford it. I have all of this money from Mom and Dad's estate. What's that great line from Hello Dolly, where Dolly says, 'Money, pardon the expression, is like manure? It's not worth a thing unless it's spread around, encouraging things to grow?'"
"Well, thank you for your kind words. I haven't heard you quote a movie in a very long time," my lovely sister said. "Maybe we could go out to a movie after dinner?"
"Let's take this one event at a time, Sarah. I can't wait to see the reaction from the men in the restaurant when you walk in," I said.
"All of this adoration that you're heaping on me may just go to my head," she said stepping out of the car. I had it valet-parked as we walked into the glass elevator that would take us to the glass-enclosed restaurant that I was last inside when all four of us were there.
"Since tonight feels like a dream to me, can we only use first names - no brother and sister? It will help me to keep focused that I have the most beautiful date in the place."
"My goodness Robert ... you're even sounding like Daddy did when he brought everybody here before. The way he and mom looked at each other back in the day was amazing. I'd expected more brothers and sisters due to the way that they were always showing everyone such ... public displays of affection."
"Well, I'm certainly glad they had you first. I was always trying to see you as undressed as I could catch you," I admitted with a light blush.
"I know," she said flashing that smile. "A few times I even knew you were watching me. It was weird, but it got me all excited. Remember my bright green bikini?"
"Yeah, I do," I said, instantly going back eight years, when she was 15, and I had just turned 11 going on 25. "Whatever happened to that swimsuit? I'd love to see you in it again," I said as we were being seated.
"I was only 15, and hadn't fully ... developed yet, when I wore that. I doubt that it would barely cover me these days," she said with a chuckle.
All I did was smile, at her as we were handed menus.
She glanced at me as I was still envisioning this version of my sister in that itty-bitty green bikini from eight years before.
She was already a doll back then ... all she needed were tits. She grew into a nice pair perfectly proportioned to the rest of her figure.
I can't believe that she knew I was perving on her. I was using my personal 'stealth' methodology using mirrors and binoculars from afar. She never called me out on it. All the rest of the time I thought I had gotten away with it except for the 'bikini incident' she just mentioned. The server who waited on us couldn't keep his eyes off Sarah.
This would make an interesting Reality Show. Put Sarah in a restaurant, waiting for a date. Put a couple of cameras on whoever was to walk up to her to see their expression and hear their vocal mutterings. My guess is that most guys wouldn't have the balls to say even a single word to her ... she's that overwhelming!
As pretty as she is I'm the lucky fella tonight. She glanced over at me catching me looking at her. "What?"
"I'm sorry, sis ... Sarah. You have always been something of a standard in my life. That's the biggest reason that I never found a girlfriend ... no one compares to you."
"If this were an actual date that line might just be the perfect line to get me to come home with you after dinner," she said leaning over and giving me a peck on the cheek.
"If this were a real date," I countered, "I might not have ever left from where I picked you up."
"You really do look like Daddy. He was a handsome man. So are you!"