Working on Sunday mornings was never any fun. Working on a beautiful Sunday morning in June, the day after your birthday was probably the least fun of all. I was not only a year older, I was also dressed in the green double knit pants and tan cotton shirt that made me look about two inches wider in the ass and two smaller in the chest.
No woman needed two more inches of ass and two less of boobs, no matter who she was. Okay, I wasn't exactly the perfect height / weight ratio to begin with, so on me the park ranger's uniform really looked awful. It was the kind of uniform that went perfectly with the kind of dorky job, a plain Jane woman like me ends up with.
A woman like me; who had been divorced for the last three years, with two kids. Also one with an ex husband who was about half worthless. He worked enough to pay his rent, but not enough it seemed to keep his child support current.
"Sarah, you cannot depend on that piece of shit you were married to," My Uncle John had said after the very first divorce hearing. "You need to talk to your daddy, it's time to make peace. Let him say I told you so, then let him be, daddy again."
"Uncle John you know he hasn't spoken to me since I married Eddie; and that has been 12 years," I said.
"That isn't true at all," Uncle John said,
"Uncle John, Mama spoke to me and the kids, daddy ignored us," I said. "After Mom passed last year, we haven't seen each other."
"It's time to stop the stupid shit. You need each other and deep down you both know it." He threw up his hands and left me standing on the terrazzo floor of the courthouse hallway.
He made it three or four steps before he turned and added, "Nobody said being Wyatt Earp's Daughter was going to be easy."
My daddy's name was Keith Earp not Wyatt. He was the County Sheriff though. Then again it was a poor county, so there wasn't a lot of competition for the job.
When I stopped by his office on the way out of the courthouse, he was glad to see me. At least that is what he said. "So is the hearing finished?" he asked trying to restrain himself and not say too much.
"Yes, I am a free woman now," I said sarcastically. "As much as I can be, with two teenage children."
"So how does that feel?" he asked.
"Some things have felt a lot better, but a lot of things have felt some worse," I said trying to be serious without also being depressing.
"So are you going to be okay?" Daddy asked.
"I honestly don't know dad? I need a better job for sure. I don't think I can depend on Eddie to take care of us." I said.
"Would you allow me to make a suggestion?" Daddy asked seriously and yet still trying not to be overbearing.
"Of course not; at least not as long as you don't get pissed, if I don't take your advice." I said and he grinned.
The advice had been this job as city park ranger. It was a job that was far from perfect, but it paid pretty well. It had regular hours, and the kids could visit me on the job. I worked 14 hour shifts Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I joked that it was a lot like an ER nurse, except that it was to save trees and ducks, not people.
I had been divorced for three years on that Sunday morning, and a park ranger for the same amount of time. Three years before that Sunday morning my father and I had made a shaky peace, we had managed to forgive each other. He really still didn't like how I lived my life, but he was more than willing to let me live it.
After that first coming together moment in the courthouse I was in for a lot more surprises and compromises. I found almost immediately that a 35 year old divorced woman with very little experience, with men or life, was sitting at the bottom of a steep learning curve. My first date after the divorce was a real example of how little I knew about life or men.
Of course I was a wreck after the divorce. Since Eddie left me for a much younger woman, I was a mess. I also was 35 pounds overweight so that was in the back of my mind as well. All that had me thinking much less than crystal clear, when Michael asked me to the movies.
"So, Ms. Trainer would you like to go to a midnight movie on campus," Michael asked. I had known Michael for years; he was one of my friend Evelyn's children.
"Your mother is my very good friend Michael. I am not about to go out with you, even if it is harmless," I said.
"Come on Ms. Trainer please, I have to go see 'Rocky Horror Show the Movie' for a class. If you don't agree, I'll be the only one without a date. Take pity on me," he said. He seemed very sincere, so I waivered.
I admit that I was flattered, especially since I had been left very insecure by the divorce. It also sounded like fun. Being around kids, that weren't mine, honestly did sound fun.
"If anyone finds out, we will both be in trouble," I said giving in finally. It took him more effort than this little narrative shows, but in the end I relented.
"It's a college movie in the student union. Not only that it's a midnight show. No one is going to know." he said convincingly.
"And this is just a movie, nothing more?" I asked just to be sure it wasn't some kind of trick. He was younger, but he was still a man. His penis was his motivational tool.
"I promise just a movie," he said smiling.
My daughter was 13 and my son was 12 at the time. Even at 20, Michael was way too close in age for comfort. Still there was something exciting about the wrongness of it all. I was sure that I could keep control of the younger man.
When that Saturday night arrived, the kids were with their father for the weekend, so I had the house to myself after work. I arrived home from the new job in time to take a shower and dress for the evening ahead. Since I could remember college I dressed in jeans and a knit top. Over that I wore a nylon parka with a thermal lining. I was dressed warm just in case the theater was cold. Many movie theaters are cold for some reason, I though. There is nothing more miserable than an hour and half of shivering.
Back in the present that early Sunday morning found me on the sign in desk inside the office of the city park. Most of the time all I had to do was remember and then try to make peace with my past. Starting at the beginning of my new life was my new plan. The plan was meant to help me understand what was going on with me at that moment and come to terms with it.
The kids were with their dad on the weekend of my date with Michael three years earlier. He showed up at 10PM just as we had agreed. With the movie starting at midnight, our plan was to go for pizza first. That being the case, I hadn't eaten after work. By ten I was feeling pretty hungry. Had he not arrived on time, he would have found me munching on a sandwich of some kind.
Since he was on time, 10:30 PM found me sitting at Sal's Pizza and Pasta Shoppe across from the college. Sal's had been there from the very early days, so the college seemed to be more or less built around Sal's. It was kind of an institution in my hometown.
I enjoyed the pizza, even though the sly glances of the people around me were a little distracting. They were mostly young college age couples out for the evening. The men seemed to be ranking me on some grading scale known only to themselves. The women on the other hand were showing open signs of disapproval. I could have told them that I was Michael's mother and it was a pity date. I wondered if boys ever took their lonely divorced moms on dates.
With the parka off, the guys could see I had slightly less than average sized boobs, and when I stood to go to the lady's room, they could tell my ass was a little wide. With me as his date I doubted that Michael would raise any in the standings of his peers. It had been his choice to 'mommy date' me, I told myself.
The pizza was good and the coffee was delicious. I had enjoyed dinner without my constantly arguing teenagers along. At the time Cindy and Charlie had just one argument but it ran nonstop from sunrise, until they were safely tucked into bed. I reminded myself daily that their lives were difficult, which was the only thing that prevented me from smothering them in their sleep.
"We should leave," Michael suggested after almost an hour in the restaurant.
"Sure, while you settle the bill, I will go to the lady's room again," I slipped him a ten dollar bill as I stood. He tried to refuse, but I whispered. "You are going to make a scene, and it will only be worse. It's just for my half; I'm not paying for you." I smiled as he sheepishly accepted the bill.
We were seated in the College Amphitheater waiting for the movie to start when I had the first warm flash. I should have known something wasn't right, but I didn't feel sick, just a little flushed. I could tell that I was also covered with a thin layer of perspiration.
"Are you okay?" Michael asked but he didn't seem more than mildly curious.
"I'm fine I think. It was probably just a hot flash. Us old ladies get them now and then," I replied. As soon as the lights went down it seemed to pass or maybe I just accepted the slightly warm state as my new normal condition. Either way it was at the same time that Michael's arm went around me, it seemed to be no big deal at the time.
A few minutes later I felt his hand cover my right breast and even that felt very normal and nice. His hand massaged my breast and my body temperature probably rose a little more. There was something about being in the room filled with kids, who were probably all doing the same thing that made it feel okay for Michael to put my hand over his erection. It felt good of course to massage it through his jeans. It seemed to be no more than just a friendly thing to do. I mean he obviously wanted me to, since he had placed my hand there.
I didn't mind, even that his was the first, other than my husband, since I was his age. It felt good, and of course my heart and respiration rates were increasing by the minute. I was also kind of standing outside myself watching. That seemed a little strange, but it also added a lot to the feeling that it was all okay somehow. It wasn't really me doing all those things.
Michael twisted toward me so I twisted to him as well, pretty soon we were locked in an embrace and the movie was forgotten. He was kissing me and trying to drive his tongue down my throat. I felt his hand move to rub my vagina through my jeans. Even though it wasn't perfect, he was still making enough contact to raise my emotional level toward an orgasm.
I usually had a lot more trouble overcoming my inhibitions, but for some reason it was all about the feelings running through my body on that night. I didn't think at all about what people might be thinking of me. It was a totally new experience and I knew that I would have to process it later. At that moment the feeling of uncertainty added to the pressure to orgasm.
I slipped from Saturday night at the movies into Sunday morning in the park, when an older man and a pre teenage boy entered the office. "Good morning guys, are you here for a fishing permit?" I asked with my best smile. The smile had some to do with the good mood I was in from the memory invasion, but also because they were both smiling at me. Everyone knows that smiles are contagious.
"Yes ma'am, we plan to put the boat in and do some fishing as well," the old man said.
"Then you already know there is a separate fee for each. You also need to display both permits, if a ranger passes. He might want to stop and examine them."
The truth was that I could see them launch the boat from the office window. If anyone launched a boat without paying first, I just called the ranger on outside patrol. In which case, the offender would not get very far at all. Unless I radioed the patrol ranger, he seldom stopped anyone. He would assume they had purchased both permits. It was also my job to watch what they loaded onto the boat. If it was fishing rods, then I should have a permit to fish on file. If not, I radioed the patrol ranger. I would much rather be the patrol ranger, but it wasn't my turn. We traded every three hours, even thought we each would have preferred to do outside patrol all day.
After the two of them left, I saw my 16 year old daughter's moped pull into the parking lot. She was supposed to be spending the weekend with her dad and she damn well better be. It was Sunday morning, but she wasn't due home until 8PM.
"What the heck are you doing here?" I asked as she walked into the office.
"Nice to see you too mom," Cindy said sarcastically.
"Yeah right," I replied just as sarcastic. "So what is it?"
"I want to spend the night with Gina," she said. "I can swing by the house for some clothes and then dad and Charlie can spend some quality 'guy time' together," she suggested. For a sixteen year old to come up with that kind of logic, she has had grownup help, I thought. She had likely been reading some advice column, 'How to manipulate your mom' kind of thing for sure.
"Yeah, now what is it you really want?" I asked.
"Lamar's mother and dad are out of town and I want to spend the night at his house." She had switched to her defiant tone. The one she had used when she told me that she and Lamar were sleeping together. Along with that she had added, "Unless you want a grand baby, you probably want to set me up with birth control pills." She also informed me during that conversation that she wasn't going to stop and Lamar didn't use condoms. Even after I explained that her grandfather was the 'high sheriff, ' she didn't back down.
She knew that her father was filled with guilt about the divorce and would never allow her to go into foster care or the juvenile justice system over sex. She had been able to manipulate him since the divorce just as well as she did me. Hell both of the kids manipulated me.
I had a consult with her grandfather anyway because it was a decision I just was not comfortable making. He explained that for all practical purposes the pills were the best idea. Even though there was some discussion about Lamar just disappearing, in the end I bought the pills and looked the other way.
So there I was at 10AM on a Sunday morning facing another crisis. Let her spend the night with the boyfriend or refuse and have her do it anyway. Some decisions were impossible not to make. "Leave me a number other than your cell phone number, just in case," I said.
"Thanks mom you are the best," she said with that smile she had come to use when talking to me.
Life hadn't seemed this complicated for my mom, when I was Cindy's age. Yeah I was screwing at her age, but my mom never knew. Well if she knew, I didn't rub her nose in it. Still, my life was what it was. I was trying to cope without too awfully much help from anyone except my dad.
After Cindy left on her buzzing moped, my mind drifted back to that first date after the divorce, I was back simply passing time behind the ranger's desk at the city park. I remembered how Michael's penis had felt in my hand, both through his pants and later when I removed it and felt his warm smooth flesh.
It was hard to imagine how naive I had been. At first I had seen Michael as the young boy I had known growing up almost with my kids. It was hard to realize that he had somehow made the leap from teenage boy to young adult male without me noticing. Well I certainly noticed that Halloween night at the midnight showing of the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Michael had me on the verge of orgasm several times. He just couldn't manage to stay at the same stimulation long enough to make it happen. God knows, I was willing to cum for him, even though he was just a little over half my age.
When the movie ended I thought I was a teenager again. I could remember before I married going home from a movie all hot and bothered. Inside the movie that night my heart had raced like a teenager and my vagina lubricated like a kid in heat as well.
We were in his car and headed to my house when out of the blue he asked, "So Ms. Smith is that pussy wet for me?"
I was in shock, but I found myself answering him truthfully. "Yes Michael." I answered.
"No say it like this when I ask you something. Say, yes honey my pussy is wet for you." he demanded.
"Do you realize how much younger you are than me?" I asked, but I was not nearly as confident as I should have been.
"Yes, and do you realize how much you need my cock?" he asked.
It got very quiet while I thought about that. Then I finally said, "Yes."
"Yes what?" he asked as if I was the child.
"Yes Michael, I realize how much I need your cock." I said. It was the strangest feeling to say that to someone so young. Hell, I never even told my husband anything like that in all our 13 years of marriage.
"Good, since you realize it, let's have no more of this acting like you have control of your emotions. You know that you don't really. You do know that don't you?"
"Yes Michael, I know that I am not in full control of myself," I said.
"You like the feeling of being out of control don't you Wanda," he asked. It was the first time he had ever called me by my given name. I didn't mind at all, which surprised me a little.
"I guess I know," I replied.
"Don't talk to me like that bitch, you know better," he snapped at me.
"I'm sorry Michael, but I'm really not sure how I feel about this. It's all new to me." I said.
"Then let me help you figure it out. Do you feel the need to cum for me?" Michael asked.
"Yes, I do feel that I need to cum." I said.
"No, you feel the need to cum specifically for me." he asked.
"Yes Michael, I do feel the need to cum for you," I said it even though it was not at all like me. I know a lot of it was my basic insecurity, but also part was that Michael was young and handsome and he wanted me. It just felt good on so many levels.
"So do you know how you feel now?" he asked.
"Yes I know how I feel now," I said.
"And do you want me to cum for you?" he asked.
"Oh God yes, I want you to cum for me." I said. I couldn't believe that I had said that to anyone, especially not Michael.
"Good, do you want me to take you to your house and fuck you?" he asked.
I was forced to answer him without the physical stimulus. I had to answer him cold and calculating. I didn't like it, but I felt that it was necessary. "Yes Michael, I want you to take me home and fuck me," I said.
"Say please," Michael demanded.
"Please take me home and fuck me," I begged.
"Come hold my cock while I drive you home," he demanded.
It was an uncomfortably long reach but I held his cock while he drove. I was glad on lots of level when we got home. I was still flushed, even though I should have had time enough to calm down. I didn't even think about that, I just wanted to get into bed. Having Michael in the bed was a bonus, but being in bed would have been enough.
Once inside my house Michael kissed me. The kiss turned me on and I just went along from there. His hands ran up and down my back while his tongue filled my mouth. I was gasping for air and loving every second of it.
I felt his hand slip into the rear of my jeans. His fingers wormed their way into my bikini panties as well. I could feel him grip my naked butt with his hand. Then without warning I felt his finger penetrate my sphincter.
It felt nasty and very uncomfortable; the only other finger to ever be in there had been a doctor's several years before. He had also used a hell of a lot of lubricant, where as Michael had used none. Michael was finger fucking my ass dry. It was extremely uncomfortable.
"How does that feel Wanda?" he asked.
"It feels strange and it hurts," I said.
"You will learn to love it trust me. Is this your first time?"
He seemed not to believe me when I said, "Yes."
"There will come a time, when that is your favorite foreplay," he said. I couldn't help but wonder how much Michael really knew and how much he had read in porno books.
I felt that again when he asked, "Do you love sucking cock?"
"I have never done that," I said nervously.
"Really, well you won't be able to say that in the morning," he said.
I admit that I was terrified. I knew that it wouldn't hurt me, but I had never done it and had no idea how to even begin. I was very turned on by all that was happening, plus everything seemed to be happening to some other woman who was super sexy, while I just watched. It was a really strange sensation. I had no idea what to expect next, but I had a feeling that it would be all new to me.
Just then Rita came into the office. Rita was my partner for the day. I was the one constant on the weekends everyone else rotated their weekend on duty. It was simply Rita's turn on duty.
"I think I am going," Rita informed me. "I'm meeting Earl for lunch."
Earl was Rita's redneck boyfriend. It was humorous, because Earl could have played the stereotypical redneck boyfriend in any movie. Just think of any of the actors you have seen in the role and you have a composite of Earl. Still Earl did treat Rita and her kids well. That was more than I could say for any of my boyfriends, who were supposed to have a better veneer of civilization. All the men in my life since the divorce and Michael had treated me badly.
On that very first date Michael had browbeat me. I don't know how he managed since I was older and better educated, but he managed to make me feel like a failure. In his eyes, and probably everyone else's, the divorce was my fault. I have no idea why the old ladies blamed me, but Michael and his ilk would have said it was because I had never sucked Eddie's dick.
I mean how is it my fault he only asked me once, when we were first married. I was barely 21 when I said no. He never asked again and it never occurred to me that the whole thing was more than a dirty joke of some kind. Suddenly with Michael my never having done that was the cause of the divorce.
"If you ever want to get a new man and keep this one you better learn how to do that well." He was more than willing to help an old lady learn of that I was sure.
Looking back three years later would I have done the same thing. Yes, but maybe not with Michael. I also would not have felt so threatened by it. Now that I know better, I would have just embraced the feeling sooner.
Michael had me sucking his dick until my jaw muscles hurt. He came in my mouth twice before he admitted that I had an adequate knowledge of it all. Yes at the end of that evening I knew how to fuck with my mouth not just allow my mouth to be fucked. I can't believe that I thought in those terms, but I suddenly did. Michael didn't just teach me to suck cock, he taught me to think like a cock sucker. I was never the same again, not in anyway. Yes, I felt slippery, when I walked on that Sunday morning three years later.
"God you are a natural cocksucker," he said after he came in my mouth the second time. "You must love the feel of cock in your mouth."
"No, but I love how you feel with your cock in my mouth," I said. He smiled very wide. I had no idea why, since I simply told the truth.
"That's how it should be. You should do it for me, but you should also love the feel of it big and smooth in your mouth. You will come to love that feeling believe me." he said that like some kind of professor. I wanted to ask if he loved the feel of cock in his mouth, but I didn't want to break the mood.
"So I have to go to work in two hours, you need to leave." I said to him.
"I didn't know you had to work," he said.
"I have no idea how I will stay awake. I guess I will drink a gallon of coffee." I said.
"Here take one of these before you start and one at lunch," he said handing me two small white pills.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Just speed," he said. "It will help you stay awake. You might crash for several hours when you get home, but at least you won't lose your job."
It had worked out just as he said. I stayed awake but I was very, very nervous. When I got home I managed a sandwich before the kids got home from their dad's then I was out like a light for twelve hours. The kids had to get themselves ready for school. I managed to drive them still dressed in my robe. Once home I felt antsy for a couple of hours, then everything was back to normal.
I could tell that even without the up all night Saturday night, I was going to need Monday to recover from the weekend's work. I was going to need something to do Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday though. That would likely need a lot of thought, since I got bored easily.
I got bored even on Monday before 4PM when the kids were home again. My son was a preteen and my Daughter was a barely teen, but they still went wide open all the time. My son, Charlie, thought he might be a ninja warrior and my daughter Cindy was convinced that she was going to be a rock star. I was pushing them both toward medicine. I didn't care what level they chose, but I was pretty sure that it should be in medicine.