Patty and I were quite close growing up, what with our fathers being brothers! We all got together at least once a week for dinner, alternating back and forth at each other's houses. They were on the same block of the same street ... only five houses separated us.
We both had in-ground pools, which meant Patty and I were always in swimsuits around one another. We were 'buddies', at least as much as a boy and a girl can be a buddy.
Our parents often said, that back when we were still in diapers, we would walk together, holding hands. We still do that when we're walking side by side.
Some descriptions are in order,
Her, Patricia Fieldstone 'Patty', a natural blonde, 18 years old, 5 foot 6, and if I were to guess, 34C—26—34, and she has green eyes that glimmer, both night and day. She's kept herself in shape by playing volleyball and basketball for every school she's gone to.
Me, Patrick Fieldstone 'Pat', also a volleyball and basketball player, a natural brownette, 18 and a half years old, 5 foot 11, with blue eyes. Not nearly as lovely as my cousin, Patty.
Yeah, that's the whole point of this story ... I got the major hot's for my cousin!
As we've grown older, we've started talking about anything and everything under the sun. When she came home from a date, I would always check her neck for hickeys.
Recently, this happened...
"Hey Patty, come here for a second. My goodness, your new boyfriend is putting your hickeys awfully high on your neck. That's gonna cause trouble at home, unless you put some makeup on it."
"Pat, you know how I hate to wear makeup. Is it really that bad?"
"Well, If I gave you a hickey," I flirted, "it'd be twice as big, but below the collar line."
"What do you know about giving hickeys, cousin Pat?"
"I know quite a bit about it, actually. I research things like that, so I know how to get a girl real hot and bothered, and then I lean over them like this, and..."
She pulled away and started to laugh ... she started to laugh at me. How rude!
"I'm sorry, Pat ... but it felt so weird for you to be so close to my neck. I though for a second you were really going to give me a hickey, just to prove your point?" She giggled.
"Yeah," I said, laughing it off. "That'd be kind of weird, wouldn't it?"
"Kind of," Patty said. "Getting a hickey from my cousin, would be weird - and kind of naughty, you know!"
I love it when her nose crinkles up when she talks, and just saying the word 'naughty, ' actually got me a little hard. I turned away and left to go towards my house.
"Hey Pat," she called. "Swimming at my place in an hour?"
"Just you and me?" I asked.
"Yeah, why'd you ask me that?"
"I don't know, you might've asked your 'boyfriend' over or something."
"Are you jealous of Brian ... who is 'not' my boyfriend?"
"Jealous is a funny word, Patty — I just think he's after you because you're so pretty, and all he ever goes after ... are the hot chicks."
"Did you just call me pretty, Pat ... and hot, too?"
It's time to jump in the boat or swim away, Pat.
"Yeah, I did, Patty — I've always though you were cute, but lately you've gone from cute to beautiful ... and from pretty to Hot, really Hot ... and if you weren't my cousin - I could show you just how hot I thought you were."
There, I opened the wound, cutting myself pretty deep, just waiting for her to pour salt in it, or maybe worse, she may slap me, and turn around and tell my uncle, or worse, my Dad.
"I think that you're real cute too, Pat!" Did I hear a giggle?
She took her hands and rubbed them all over my face; I wasn't exactly sure what she was doing, or what I should do. She dropped her hands and leaned over to put her mouth near my ear, and she said, "one hour, my pool" and walked away.
Not wanting to be too eager, I showed up an hour and eight minutes later, with a towel, a t-shirt and some tanning cream. I was hoping she might ask me to 'rub her down' with some tanning cream. That's not exactly the cream I was really hoping to use on her!
Pat, you need to calm down? Don't blow it, she just asked you to swim, not to stare at those beautiful tits, or that scrumptious ass of hers, or gaze into those magnificent green eyes of hers.
I walked in through the back gate and saw her. Breathe ... dude!
You know that way in the cartoons when a guy sees a girl; they make his eyes grow huge for a split second ... that just happened to me!
Patty was wearing a bulky t-shirt over a gorgeous red bikini, that I'd seen before, and as I walked in, she did that hair flip thing that girls do, and looked at me like I was dessert, or something. Oh boy, Pat - keep it real, keep it focused ... keep it down!
"Hi," I said, clearing my throat, in case I wanted to actually say anything else today. I'm not too sure I can talk any more ... all the blood in my body has gone south of the waistband.
"Hi to you too, Cousin Pat," she said, her face turning into that smile that makes me hard ... er ... feel good!
She likes to joke that if we lived in the Appalachian Mountains, we might be kissin' cousins, so she'd sometimes call me by the moniker, Cousin Pat!
"How are all the folks doing these days, Cousin Patty?" Two can play at this game.
"Daddy's at work and mommy's gone shoppin, ' so it's just you and me for however long you might want to stay over. How about you and your kith and kin, Cousin Pat?"
God almighty, I think I might just explode right now. Somebody ... save me from myself.
"Well, Cousin Patty ... my poppa is off at work, at the same place your poppa works, and my little momma is gone to bridge club, so I've been left all alone, too. What ever could we find to do for four hours, or more - Skinny dippin' at the cement pond?"
She was reaching down to the bottom edge of her t-shirt and grabbed it. She stopped, looking up at me, and smiled.
She then proceeded to raise the shirt up, why oh why didn't I bring a camera ... and ... there they were. Ugh! The girls, her bosoms! The single best looking pair of boobs I'd ever seen, in print or in quicktime movies on the Internet.
I'm certain my mouth was open, and I was anticipating her finishing up taking her shirt off, but she seemed to be stuck.
Being the gentleman that I was, I said, "Wait a second, Patty — I'll help you." I ran over to where she was and grabbed the shirt and raised it again. The shirt was covering her face, and I had an unobstructed view of the girls, within the confines of a bikini top, of course.
"Pat, what're you doing? Help me out of this, please?" she asked.
"The t-shirt or your bikini, or both?" I said as calmly as possible.
"You're so silly sometimes, are you staring at my tits?"
"Well, they're staring at me ... least I could do, is to stare back at them?"
"My necklace is caught in my t-shirt ... Pat, help me get it off, please?"
"All right, Cousin Patty — I'll help you get your shirt off, and anything else you'd like me to remove."
"You're one sick puppy, getting all out of sorts, just because of my tits ... your first cousins tits, that is!"
"My dick doesn't know that you're my first cousin, it just knows that my eyes have locked on to a really nice pair of chesticles."
"You are such a pervert," Patty said, finally getting the shirt off, and now trying to fix her necklace. Her hands were all fumbling and she dropped her necklace into the valley between her breasts."
"I'll get 'em ... it!" I said, much too eagerly.
"That's all right, Pat - I'll get the necklace. What makes me think you might take a couple of minutes to find it, if I let you 'go hunting?'"
"I'm sure it would have taken me at least ten minutes to find the necklace. My hands are registered with the local Search and Rescue Team in the area."
Patty laughed at that, which made me think that she was all right with everything that had happened, at least so far.
"Is it save to guess that you flirt with your other female cousins, the way you flirt with me all the time, Pat?"
"Not a single other female relative of mine is one-tenth as beautiful as you are Patty!"
"A girl could get ideas for a guy who keeps calling her beautiful?"
"Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful!"
She jumped into the pool, and I quickly followed. She came up out of the water even prettier, because water was falling off of 'everything' and I just ogled her.
"My eyes are up here," I heard her say.
I felt a slap on my shoulder.
"Up here, my eyes ... Pat — yoo-hoo — Pat, would you look me in the eyes, please?"
"Oh, I'm sorry Patty ... I'm being awfully rude. I just can't get over how much you've changed in the last couple of years. Your butt is 'to die for, ' your eyes mesmerize me, and your breasts, I can't take my eyes off your breasts for some reason."
"I'm really sorry, Patty ... If I was your boyfriend, I wouldn't let you go anywhere without me by your side, to protect, to kiss you, and to make love to you, whenever you wanted me to. Damn it, there I go again ... talking without thinking first!"
"You know, Pat ... Brian is a bit of an ass-hole, and anyhow, like I said, 'he's not my boyfriend!' I went out with him a couple times, but he never wanted to talk to me, all he wanted to do was just put his hands all over me, in places I was uncomfortable with."
"If I was your boyfriend Patty, I'd love to talk to you about my favorite subject."
"And what is that, Pat?"
I saw that I must've said something wrong, because I saw Patty crying. Damn my big mouth and me. I've got to try to fix this.
I walked up to her, putting my hand on her face, holding her tight, and said, "What's wrong, Patty? I didn't mean to make you cry ... I was just trying to tell you - tell you how much I care about you."
"I'm not crying because of what you said, I'm crying because I'm beginning to think that you're the only boy that understands me; what I feel, what I want, what I desire!"
Dare I ask the hanging question that her answer seems to require? I'm pretty sure she's expecting me to ask, so, ever the gentleman, or horn dog, or maybe a little of both ... here goes.
"What is it exactly, that you desire, Patty?" I asked her as I looked closely in those stunning green eyes of hers.
"I — I — I can't say it, Pat," she said turning her eyes from mine. "I can't tell you what I want to tell you ... what you might want to hear, because it's so wrong, it's immoral, depraved, and most of all, it's illegal."
"What is, Patty? You know we can tell each other anything, anything at all. We talk about school, boys, girls ... who's pretty, who's ugly, who's pretty ugly?"
That got her smiling and giggling.
"You always have something kind to say to me Pat, so I'll just say it."
I was ready for anything, to be told to leave, to be slapped away or to be held, as close to her as possible. "OK, say it, Patty!" I tensed up, closed my eyes, and waited for the slap.
"The reason Brian isn't my boyfriend is, because I'm in love with somebody else. Somebody, I have no right to be in love with, somebody that can't love me as much as I want to be loved. This person probably knows how much I care for him, but I'm afraid to tell him how much I care. Because I'm afraid he won't love me as much as I love him."
My mouth was agape over this confession ... I could only imagine, that I was who she was talking about. I didn't dare break into the moment ... I would wait for her to make the next move.
"I don't know what I'm going to do about this love I have for him, Pat. He looks at me, like I'm a real girl ... not like those boys who can't or won't look me in the eye. He's so nice, so tender."
My mouth was drying out. I couldn't get much moisture in my mouth from my own spit. She was looking right at me through this whole speech ... her eyes filling with moisture, but not yet releasing into a fully formed tear. Oh ... there's one, and another. I couldn't hold my impulses any longer; I leaned over her neck and kissed her behind the ear.
She responded by pushing back into me. I took my hand and put it on her bikini bottom covered butt and I heard her make a sound I'd only ever heard in a porn movie. "Ugghhhhhhh!"
She bent her neck over more, allowing me to keep kissing her on it, being careful to avoid doing anything that would leave a mark on that wonderfully tanned skin. She brought her lips to my neck and started to gnaw on it. I said, "Lower, please" and she moved to my shoulder where she started to suck on my neck, like she was a vampire in training, and didn't stop for at least three minutes. I knew I would have the 'Mark of Patty' on my neck, and I would be very proud of it.
We both pulled up at the same time and just looked at each other, and we moved our heads and mouths closer to one another, making contact. It felt so damn good. Better than any of the dreams I'd been having about her.
Her mouth tasted so nice. I kissed her upper lip with my lower lip, which she put between her lips and sucked on for a moment. I felt her tongue enter my mouth, and that was a sensation for the ages. I'd never been so hard in my whole young life, which she had to have felt. We were still joined at the hip.
We separated for a moment and she asked, "Do you want to finish this inside, on my bed, Cousin Pat?"
"Oh, Cousin Patty, I'll start anything, or finish anything you want, on your bed. Are you safe?"
"Yeah — I'm safe, but you may never be safe around me. Come on."
We got out of the pool and dried off, wrapping the towels around our waists, and went inside. I walked over to lock the glass door and the front door, and then followed the most beautiful ass I'd ever known, up the stairs.
"Yeah, Cousin Patty?"
"Let's take a shower, first!"
"First?" I gulped.
"Yeah, first ... before!"
"Before, before, before — I do believe — I do, I do believe."
"What are you babbling about, Patrick?"
OK, I've got to explain the reference to 'I do believe.' In the movie, Miracle on 34th Street, the original one mind you, all of the remakes were shit. After the little girl has suddenly come to the conclusion that the nice old man is Santa Claus, she goes into a kind of stupor, saying to herself, 'I do believe, ' kind of a combination mantra, and telling herself, that it really is possible that what her mother told her was wrong, about more things than just 'there is no such thing as Santa Claus!' Thus I've been using that and other movie and TV catch phrases, or snippets from movie songs, my whole life, when the moment strikes me as odd or unbelievable. You've been warned!
Patrick -- never before has my name sounded so good to me, holy crap! This beautiful girl, my cousin and I, are about to take a shower together. Lord, if you are going to strike me dead ... please give me 10 more minutes before you do - no 15! This girl is worth it.
I heard the water starting. I'd fallen behind Patty, hesitating a little, worried about whether I would die with my cock hard. Boy would that be difficult, for Patty to explain to our fathers.
I was walking into the valley of tits, I will fear no evil, thy rod and my shaft will comfort her. Ohh, my!
I walked into the bathroom and Patty was taking off her bikini top. The girls, oh — I get to meet the girls, up close and personal. I'd stopped in my tracks and was just agog over what was happening before my very eyes. The girls were unbelievable ... round like grapefruits, but with each one having a wonderfully sized nipple. I leaned forward, somewhat instinctively.
She pushed me away, and said, "Later, Pat ... after?"
After? — Before? — When is Later? — All I ever hear is later, Patrick, First? — Second? All of these words are clogging up my head. I've gotta pee!
"I've got to go to the bathroom Patty?"
"It's right there, Pat," she said.
Peeing in front of her? Oh, my! Doesn't she realize that it's a physical impossibility for a guy to pee when he has a hard-on? I'll try, but I don't expect much to happen.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her reaching down to take off her bikini bottoms. Since I was having no success peeing I turned and watched her performing the 'Dance of the Bikini Bottom Removal, ' every bit as beautiful as any ballet performed, on the face of the earth.
I reached down and took off my board shorts, with my hard-on flapping in the breeze. Patty looked over at me, and smiled, licking her lips. Breathe! She reached in and turned on the shower, using her fingers to determine when it was hot enough. The girls were bobbing around looking at me ... just waiting for me to touch them, to play with them.
I do believe!
The water must have gotten the right temperature, because Patty walked in. I saw a hand come out and do that thing where she curls it up towards herself — beckoning me. I thought to myself ... we're going to need a bigger shower.
I'd love to tell you that Patty and I had bodacious sex in the shower, but she actually wanted to wash herself. Imagine that! I was allowed free and unfettered access to the girls, but I kept them to my hands, mainly because I was having problems breathing. I did kiss my cousin ... and it was every bit as good as I'd imagined it would be.
Her lips were amazingly soft and supple. While we were kissing, another portion of our body's were making contact as well, but Patty ignored it, or should I say, attempted to ignore it, because all on it's own, without any help from me at all, 'it' found it's destination, Patty's pussy ... sort of like the way a divining rod finds water, my dick found the nearest source of ... something.
Patty turned off the shower, and we just stood there, with my dick poised at the entrance to her pussy. Patty looked down at our near consummation and said, "Did I do that?" with the most beautiful grin on her face.
She stepped out of the shower, grabbing a towel and throwing it to me. She then got one for herself, and we slowly dried each other off, then we went into the bedroom, with my anatomy still flapping.
"Cousin Pat, I have a confession to make to you?" she said.
You're really a man, oh god no ... you have Hepatitis F, or whatever the current letter is to go with that, I don't care; the world is coming to and end, and we're gonna fuck like bunnies until we die."
"Cousin Pat, are you with me?" she giggled, waving her hand in front of my face.
"Sorry Patty, something silly popped in my head ... it's gone. You have my complete attention, and his too!" I said, pointing straight down.
"You're so silly sometimes, but such a hunk," she said. "My confession is this ... I've never made love before. I've wanted to, on a number of occasions, but something always kept me from getting real close to any one boy."
Cue the music; One boy, one special boy, one boy to fuck with, forever and ever ... One boy, and I hope it is me.
"And," I asked, "are you worried about it now? I'm not just any boy you know. I'm a boy who has lusted and loved you for as long as I can remember ... even before you got those big beautiful bouncing breasts. I've loved you ... your pretty hair, smile and eyes suckered me in a long time ago, but I was awkward at talking about anything, except dinosaurs and video games."
Sitting on the bed, naked she said, "To tell the truth, Pat ... I think that you've been on my mind a lot longer than just recently. I sometimes dream about you, wanting you in the bed beside me, just holding me, caressing me and loving me."
Unbelievably, without anyone touching me, I just came all over the floor. Her words, her fucking words ... made me cum! Oh my god, I thought it was a myth that a guy could cum without being touched at all.
Call the MythBusters — this one is Feasible!
Bending over to clean it up, I said, "Sorry Patty, that never happened before, at least not without some help from my right hand."
That made her giggle. She was lying on the bed now, looking straight into my eyes with those piercing green eyes of hers. I finished cleaning up my dead swimmers and threw the towel back into the bathroom hamper. Don't worry fellows - you haven't died in vain.
"I have something to confess as well, Patty!"
"What's that?" she whispered from the bed.
"I've dated a few girls, but none of them compare to you, so I'd always find a reason to break up with them, when they wanted to move forward. I never wanted to fantasize about you, but you were ... are in my dreams, practically every night. I constantly dream about my hot Cousin Patty."
"So, you're saying you're a virgin, too?" she said, grinning and giggling, causing her boobies to jiggle as well.
"Yes," I said, climbing up on the bed. "I'm nervous as hell, right now. After cumming like that, I'm afraid for what else might happen, uncontrollably. My love for you is that way. This might sound lame, but could we just get under the covers and cuddle for a little bit. Part of my regular dreams include us sleeping together ... no, I really mean sleeping, not fuc ... making love."
"You can say the word 'Fuck' in front of me, Pat. It's not like I'm a Sunday school teacher, I curse all the time."
We got under the covers, I scooted right behind her, pushing my hard dick against her butt. I reached my arm over her hip and rested my hand, directly on her very wet pussy.
She breathed hard and said, "You can keep it there, if you'd like?"
"Thank you, you feel very nice, Pat. I could get used to this, sleeping together, even if we don't fuck first ... it feels nice. Like we were meant to be together."
Amazingly, we fell asleep.
I woke up, thinking that I was in my own bed, but then an arm, that wasn't mine, reached across me and scratched my stomach.
That moment near the end of Groundhog Day, flashed in my mind, as I said, "Something is different," as I grabbed Patty's arm and rolled over, to on top of her. I started to kiss her and maul her tits a little.
"You ready to take my virginity Pat?"
"What time is it, Patty?"
Turning to her left, she said, "4pm - we slept for over three hours. You need to put your shorts back on, quickly ... Daddy is due home any minute."
She grabbed her suit and ran into the bathroom. I scrambled to put my board shorts back on ... being still wet just a little, made it tougher. I heard a door open downstairs. I finished getting my shorts on, and grabbed a magazine from the floor of Patty's room, and casually started looking through it.
Uncle Reggie popped his head in, saying, "Hi Pat ... where's Patty?"
"She had to go to the bathroom, she should be right out."
As if on cue, Patty walked out in her red bikini; her spectacular beauty took even her father aback, I saw his eyes curl up.
"Patty, you really should wear more than that around your cousin ... he's still a guy."
"Oh, Daddy ... Cousin Pat doesn't care what I wear, or don't wear. Do you Cousin Pat?"
"No Cousin Patty, you could walk around naked for all I care."
"You two have always been a little strange, I can't put my finger on it, but you two are up to something, aren't you?" her Dad reasoned.
"What Daddy, you think Cousin Pat and I are 'kissing cousins?'"
"Well, are you, Pat ... what do you have to say about what Patty just said?" Reggie inquired.
"Hypothetically, what would you do, if, we were 'kissing cousins?'" I asked, for some smartass reason.
"Interesting hypothetical you got there, Pat. Well, if you and your cousin were seen kissing by anyone other than your immediate parents, it would be potentially, a real big deal, hypothetically speaking. And if you'd thought you were getting away with it, hypothetically, it would be real important to wipe her lipstick off your lips, Pat!"
Hypothetically - I just crapped my pants.
"Busted, you two. Come on give it up. What's happened, there's nothing you can tell me that would shock me ... nothing at all? Really?" Reggie said.
"Then sit down, Uncle Reggie. This is gonna blow your mind!"
Patty and I told him all about our teasing and seducing of one another over the past few days. He was surprised to find out we hadn't consummated our relationship.
He was also surprised when I told him that I was in love with Patty, and she reciprocated her feelings as well.
"Are you sure it's not just lust, Pat?" her Dad asked sincerely.
"No, sir ... I love her - I have, since I can remember."
"And you Patty, are you in love with your cousin as well?"
She fidgeted a little, played with her hair, but she stood up and said, "Yes Daddy, I'm in love with my Cousin Pat. If we hadn't slept so long, we'd have made love by now. I'm sorry Daddy ... you always told me to wait for the boy that I felt true love for ... and that boy, is your brother's son." She started crying really big tears, so I went over to her and put my arms around her, to comfort her.
"I see the love, as clear as day, between the two of you. I'll probably be able to explain it to your mother."
"Pat, go home ... wash your face and come back dressed for dinner, maybe with a tie on, to help sell it." Uncle Reggie.
"Yes Sir! Patty, thank you for standing up and telling your father how you feel ... that makes me so proud of you." I went to kiss her; I looked over at Uncle Reggie, who waved me through. I gave her a nice kiss and left. I heard Uncle Reggie say to Patty, "Put something nice and modest on, please? Underwear is mandatory!"
He left her room and catching up to me, because I was loitering and listening, put his hand on my back and said, "I'll do all I can to help you two, just behave, until this is settled."
I left to go home and change.
As I came down dressed in a nice shirt and tie, my folks, who had gotten home a little bit earlier, looked at each other. "I feel underdressed, what's the occasion Pat; got a big date later, who's the lucky girl?" Dad asked.
"All things will be answered in due time, Archibald and Elizabeth. Come on ... we don't want to be late, do we?"
My Mom turned to my Dad and said, "Check his room for a pod, Archie?"
I walked up to my Mom and gave her a big hug, plus a quick peck on the cheek, and said, "I love you Mom!"
Now it was my Dads turn to say, "Who are you - and what have you done with our son? Take me to your mother ship please?"
"Dad, that was so funny, 10 years ago when you first said it. Now it's even more hilarious than ever."
We all laughed.
I opened the door and we started to walk to his brother's place, like I said before, it's only five houses down the street from us. We usually just barge into the house, but I felt a little more decorum was necessary, so I knocked on the door.
Patty opened the door, wearing a beautiful blue dress, with her hair in a ponytail. Her eyes were sparkling, as I heard her say, "Hello, everybody ... Mom and Dad, Archie and Betty are here! Come in, everybody ... its so nice to see all of you again. Patrick, you look so nice!"
"Thank you, Patricia ... may I say you look exceptionally beautiful tonight?"
My folks were looking all around for some reason, and said, "OK, Where are the cameras? We're being punked, right?"
Reggie came up, and gave his brother a firm handshake and his sister-in-law a kiss on the cheek.
My Mom went up to Aunt Ronnie and asked, "Do you know what's going, here Ronnie. I feel like Rod Serling is about to come out and talk about the Twilight Zone, or something?"
Reggie spoke up, and said, "The kids have a presentation for us all after dinner. I'm the only one privy to what's going to happen. I'm under strict orders to remain silent - until that portion of the evening."
"Kids, what the heck is going on here?" Patty's Mom asked.
"After dinner dear," Reggie responded. "Lets enjoy the steaks and potatoes, everybody."
Dinner was fabulous, as is usual at these events. Everyone was getting his or her fill. The four adults had wine with dinner and Patty and I had our usual coca cola's, put in a glass over ice, to look a little nicer than just the cans on the table.
I got up and topped off everyone's wine, while Patty got up and cleared away the plates. After we were both done, I went to the fridge and got a coke to top off our drinks as well. Mom, Dad and Ronnie were watching our every move, like there was a clue to what was about to happen.
After a few more minutes of just sitting around the table, I refilled all of the wine glasses, again, and than asked everyone to move into the living room. Our Mom's were looking at each other, trying to figure out what was about to happen.
Reggie came up to Patty and me and quietly asked, "Are you ready to do this, you two?"
"NO, but we're going to anyway!" I said. Patty nodded and smiled.
All four of them were on the edge of their seats, waiting for what Patty and I had to say to them. Reggie was positioned to see my Dad's reaction to this pronouncement.
"Mom and Dad, Uncle Reggie and Aunt Ronnie, something has happened. Patty and I have something very important to tell you. We wish to ask you, to keep outbursts and questions to yourselves until we're completely through."
There was a moment of silence...
"I'm pregnant," Patty said, causing a lot of confusion and noise around the table. Reggie got what we were doing, and helped to get them all to calm down.
"No," I said. "Patty is not pregnant. I had her say that, to get your brains ready to wrap around a concept that's - rather strange, even for the six of us."
"Well, if she's not pregnant, then why would you have her say she was, son?" my Dad asked.
I put my hands up and said, "Dad ... all will be explained, bear with us?"
Patty took over, "Since Patrick and I were little kids, we always were always over at the other one's house, playing games, swimming, doing homework, and all of that kind of stuff, together."
I followed up, "As we grew older, we kept a pretty small cadre of friends, each others parents, and we each had a best friend -- Mine was Patty!"
"And mine, was Pat," Patty offered. I could see her about to break down, so I had to hurry this along. She was biting her lip.
"Recently, we realized we were even closer than best friends," I said. The light of the situation was beginning to dawn them all, so I quickly added, "I, am in love with Patricia!"
"And I, am in love with Patrick," Patty said, her eyes starting to moisten.
"We're not telling you this, to get your approval. We're telling you this ... because you all deserve to know what's going on."
I walked over to Patty, put my arm around her and gave her a quick little kiss on the lips.
Turning to the parents, I asked, "Any questions?"
After the shouting and the yelling was over, my Dad got up and said, "You're fucking crazy, Patrick ... Betty, let's go!"
"Dad, you and Mom can leave, but I'm staying with my girl Patricia, right here!"
"But you can't be ... you two are first cousins!" Dad reasoned, but clearly sounding unreasonable.
"Archie, there's absolutely no reason to yell like that," my Mom said. "Let's hear them out? It took a helluva lot of courage to do and say what they've done, and said already tonight."
"It's that slut of a daughter that my brother has, that's caused all of this ... she's got her hands down your little boys pants, and he likes it too much, to give it up," my Dad said, causing Patty to start crying.
Reggie responded, "I'll ignore that remark for a moment, Archie, and tell all three of you something that may amaze you ... and possibly change your minds about this whole situation. All these two kids have done is kiss ... yep, that's all. They didn't have to tell you three anything at all. They could've gone on for who knows how long, sneaking around, but they didn't - they wanted us to know how they felt about each other, they wanted us to know ... so, I'll say this just once."
"Patricia honey, I'm very sorry my ass of a brother, called you a slut, you don't deserve that. Patrick, you can stay with us until your father comes around ... or is hit by a bus!"
That generated some chuckles, from the mothers at least.
Reggie continued, "Archie, you are my only brother and I love you, and they are going to love one another, whether we approve of it or not. It took me a bit to understand, but I clearly see the love they have for each other."
"So, What are you going to do, Archie? Leave and ostracize your son, who may hate you for the rest of his natural life, or wrap your arms around him, happy that he's found the love of his life, literally, in his own backyard?" Uncle Reggie was fighting back strong emotions, all through this rave of his.
I saw my Dad thinking about it ... my uncle's speech had gotten to him, I could tell. Mom and Aunt Ronnie were crying.
Dad turned towards me and asked, "You two have only kissed, is that the truth, Patrick? Look me straight in the eye, and tell me, all you've done is kiss her?"
I walked over and looked my Dad straight in the eye, only a foot from him, and said, "Dad ... have I ever lied to you?"
He flinched, "No, son ... you've never lied to me!"
"I've only kissed this beautiful girl, and its aching me inside, that you think that I've done anything to deserve you yelling at her like that, calling her a ... I've only kissed this girl, and believe me when I say, I have desired to do much more, but my morals, the morals you and Mom instilled in me, have kept me from the arms of the only girl ... I've ever wanted in my entire life." I was sobbing, Patty put her arm on me, and I leaned into her.
I looked up and saw my Dad, the man I most admire in the world, start to cry. His head was shaking, imperceptibly, and I heard from his lips, "I apologize Patricia! I'm very sorry for what I said to you. Pat could do a lot worse, but not any better than you."
"I accept your apology, Uncle Archie." She went over and gave him a kiss on his cheek. I swear my Dad blushed a little.
She came back to me and grabbed my arm. I looked over at Reggie and Ronnie; they were smiling - great big smiles.
My Dad came back to me and said, "Patrick, I believe you completely, but please, the two of you, practice safe sex ... Ronnie get her on birth control before these two have any rug-rats."
"Archie, she's been on birth control since she was 15, I saw how beautiful she was going to be, I protected her from herself. I plan on getting her a prescription for the Plan B pill as well."
My Dad went on and said, "All I ask of you two, is ... only in your own beds, only when nobody else is home, and clean up after yourselves, please?"
"Well said, honey," my Mom said to Dad. "Let's go home and leave the two of them to be alone for awhile. Wait just a minute Archie!" Mom went over to Patty and gave her a great big hug. I heard her say to Patty, "Your kids will be so beautiful."
I went over to my Dad and we shook hands, like gentlemen --warriors, preparing to battle. Hell, I hope not? He'd beat the shit out of me!
I do believe!
"Mom and Dad, I love you!" Patty said.
Her father said, "I know my brother, kids ... he's fair, although he's unwilling to show his softer side to just anybody."
"Thank you, Uncle Reggie and Aunt Ronnie? I never saw my Dad cry before, ever! Patty, I'm very sorry for what he called you — I certainly never thought of you that way, a tease maybe a little, but not a..."
"OK, you two," Ronnie interrupted. "First, Patrick, drop the aunt and uncle, just call us Reggie and Ronnie, we're cool ... but your father has a point, so instead of doing anything tonight, why don't you two go out to a movie together; get used to each other. Reggie, give me some money, please ... I want to treat these kids to a movie."
Reggie went into his wallet and took out two twenty's — Ronnie grabbed them right out of his hand, before he had the wallet back in his pants pocket.
Reggie came over to me, leaned in and said, "The Milburn Theatre gets really dark, and in the back row, nobody would see you two, making out. Keep the hardcore stuff to yourselves, for when we're gone during the day. Ronnie, what's happening in your life tomorrow?"
"Well, honey ... I was planning on staying home and baking some cookies. Oh, you want me to be gone tomorrow, so the kids can finally. Yeah ... I'll run some errands and maybe go over to Betty's for a while, how does from 10am until noon sound, kids?"
"If I start at 10am, Ronnie, I may be done by 1015am, if you know what I mean," I said with a tremendous blush on my face, realizing what I had just said to the parents of my 'new girlfriend.'"
"That just might be too much information Patrick -- bring your suit, or not. Your aunt and I ... sorry, Ronnie and I, have been known to do some skinny-dipping in our pool, so more power to you. Since I came so close to walking in on you two the other day, I'll call first, before 'anybody' comes home, all right?"
"Thank you, both ... very much. Tonight would have gone very different without your support Reggie," I said, "It's good to have you on our side; both of you. Patty, you want to change first, or do you want to enjoy me looking at you in that beautiful dress all night?"
"Give me just a minute, Pat? I'll be back down in just a minute."
Calling up after her, "I don't know if I can wait a minute or not ... that's how much I love you ... ooh, sorry guys — I guess I just blurted there."
"Don't be out too late, don't do anything stupid in the theatre, OK, Pat ... Pat, are you hearing me. Oh dear Ronnie, he's gone ... he's so in love, isn't it obvious?" Reggie said.
"Did you say something, Reggie? I'm sorry, she's been part of my life for so long, I can only hope I can express my love to her without further blathering and blurting."
Patricia came back down, having let her hair out of its ponytail and she put on, just a hint of makeup. "Can we take the car, Daddy?" she asked.
"Sure, kids ... be easy on him Patty, he's just a babe in the woods." Reggie said, as he winked at me.
Patty let me drive; she leaned into me, like a real girlfriend. I had my right arm around her while I was driving to the theatre using my left hand.
Patty asked, "Do you want to go see a movie Pat, or would you like to go ... somewhere else instead?"