I watched my niece Amy wave goodbye to her parents until their car disappeared around the bend. She was smiling, but I knew something was wrong.
I had come to visit my brother Mike and his wife Judy for the long weekend. Back when I was married, the families used to socialize back and forth. My son Isaac was a couple years older than Amy, and lived mostly with his mother. Mike and Judy had helped me out a lot when I was going through my divorce.
Although for most of the weekend we were doing things with all four of us, her parents had taken advantage of the free babysitting to get some time away as a couple. They felt especially relaxed when I was sitting, they said, since they knew Amy liked me so much and we got along so well. They didn't feel the least bit guilty or worried, and that made for a special outing for them.
Amy shut the front door and trudged my way. She then flopped down on the couch beside me, her smile vanishing. It was 2:30 on a Saturday afternoon in June, the first weekend after school got out for the summer.
She gave a huge sigh and frown.
"Hi, Amy. Why so sad?"
"First the boys laughed at me, and then when I asked my parents, they laughed too!"
"Oh, dear! That sounds terrible. Tell me what's the matter."
I could see hope flicker on Amy's face, but it faded quickly. "You'll just laugh at me too!"
"No, Amy, I promise that no matter what you say, I won't laugh."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes! No matter what you say, I promise to take you seriously."
Amy was my favorite niece, and I guess I was her favorite uncle. We only saw each other a couple times a year, but we had a rapport.
When you only see a child a couple times a year, you really notice the changes each time. I'd watched Amy grow from a crying bundle into a curious toddler, an energetic preschooler, and a happy-go-lucky young girl. I'd watched her get uncertain and shy as she got to middle school and watched her embarrassment with her growing and changing body. She had just turned 14, and was finally fully developed. Her lithe, athletic 5'4" body was topped by a head with shoulder-length light brown hair, gray eyes and a pretty smile.
"You sure you won't laugh?"
"OK." She sighed. "It started when I was going through the park, and there were a couple of little boys, like fourth grade maybe, and though their backs were to me, I could just see them peeing -- streams shooting way out, like this..." She demonstrated the arc of pee. "They were like 50 yards away, and I couldn't help stopping to look. And then the terrible thing was -- oh, God, this was so embarrassing -- Jacob and Bill saw me looking!"
"Who are Jacob and Bill?"
"They're juniors in my high school, best friends, and Jacob lives right next door." Her head jerked to show which side.
I knew Amy was just a freshman, and understood the status difference that implied.
She relayed the conversation:
"Whatcha looking at, Amy? Never seen a boy take a leak before?" That's what Jacob said. I bet I turned red, and they laughed.
And then he goes, "You know what they were really doing?"
I shook my head 'cuz I didn't know, not really.
"Ah, c'mon, no idea?"
"Peeing?" I said, 'cuz I had to say something.
"Well, duh!" said Jacob. "They're seeing who can pee the farthest. You wanna have a competition like that, the three of us? See who can pee the farthest?"
And I said, "No", and they laughed again.
"I bet I could do 10 feet, easy!" said Jacob.
"10 feet? What a wimp. I could do 10 yards, no problem!" said Bill.
"Yeah, right! What about you, Amy? How far can you pee?"
"She couldn't, she'd just dribble and wet her pants."
And then they both just laughed and walked away. I was so mad!
The boys sounded insensitive at best, and my dear niece sure looked unhappy. I saw no reason to laugh.
"I want a penis! I want one so bad!"
Now I could see some temptation to laugh, but I didn't. She was watching me carefully.
"Then when I told my parents that, they both laughed at me!" Lowering her eyes, she said, "I'm just so dumb and stupid."
"No, Amy, you're nothing of the kind! You want a penis -- there's nothing wrong with that."
"Really?" she said.
"I mean, you know most girls don't have one, so you're in the same boat with them, but there's nothing wrong with wanting one."
Amy smiled and scooted over next to me and gave me a big sideways hug. "Thanks, Uncle Mark! I hoped you'd understand!"
I freed my arm to put it around her shoulder, and she promptly climbed onto my lap and snuggled her right side against my chest.
Amy had been doing that since she was a little girl, and it felt nice. But she was now a sexy young woman, and I couldn't help noticing her that way too. Her hair smelled great. Fortunately I kept my reaction to my thoughts without it affecting my body.
I thought. How could I help Amy get a penis? There was a long pause.
Amy must have been thinking too. "You said most girls don't have one. Does that mean some do?"
"I guess a few have little ones." There were a few people who were kind of in the middle, right? And I'd seen some pictures of some pretty big, penis-like clits.
"I wonder if I'd know for sure. I've hardly ever really seen a penis anyway."
"Have your mommy and daddy looked to see if you have one?"
"Have you asked them to look?"
"No ... That would be SO embarrassing. They already laughed at me."
Amy's back was warm under my arm, and her side and cheek warm against my chest. Her hair smelled great. What I said next made me nervous.
"I've got an idea, Amy. Why don't we go to your room and you can show me. Maybe you've got one, like a little one, and just don't know it."
She looked up at me with surprise. "I'm not supposed to show anyone my private parts!"
"That's good you know to keep your privates private, but I'm not just anyone. I'm family! I'd be happy -- I mean willing -- to look." After a pause, I added, "Of course, only if you want me to."
I couldn't tell quite what mix of emotions was going through Amy's head as she looked up at me, but she suddenly said, "OK!" and bounced off my lap. I followed her.
"But Uncle Mark, you have to promise not to tell anyone! OK!"
"Of course, it'll just be our secret."
"Yes! I didn't laugh at you, right?"
"Yeah," she said, giving me a trusting smile.
She locked the door behind us once we were in her room.
"Oops!" she said, spying some underwear on the floor. "Don't look, OK?"
I pretended to shut my eyes until she'd thrown the underwear in the closet. She smoothed down the blankets on her unmade bed.
"OK, you want to show me?" I asked.
She didn't hesitate, but in one motion pulled her jeans and panties down to her knees. "See? No penis!"
Indeed, there was no penis showing. There was a modest tuft of light brown hair, but naturally everything else was hidden the way she was standing.
"Well, if there is one it's not very big, that's true. But it's hard to see this way. Why don't you take those off all the way and sit on the bed ... Good. And now, spread your legs a little so I can get a better look ... Yeah, it's pretty small if it's there at all." Her labia had opened just a little.
"You want to see a comparison? I could show you mine."
"Oh!" she said, startled, then continued with, "Yeah, that would be nice."
Without fanfare, I pulled off my own shorts and briefs and sat beside her. My penis was pretty small, almost all shriveled into my body. It was a bit chilly in the house for shorts, and my penis had reacted accordingly. Not much more than the tip was showing.
"Huh, it's not so big, I guess," she said. "Fat, but pretty short."
I didn't mind her evaluation in the least. As everyone with experience knows, it isn't the length in this condition that mattered.
"I have an idea. Have you heard of the power of mind over matter?"
"Um, sort of, maybe."
"Sometimes, if you concentrate really hard on something, you can make it happen by just thinking about it. So what if we sit here side by side on the bed..." I shuffled over so the outside of my bare right thigh was firmly against the outside of her left, and took her hand in mine.
"Now let's both close our eyes, and think really hard about you growing a nice, big penis," I said.
"OK!" she said.
So we sat. I was very aware of my niece sitting right beside me, naked from the waist down. I could feel her warm thigh pressing into mine, feel her soft hand in mine. I could just barely hear her breathing and detect a faint, delicious odor -- whether from her body or her girl's room, I wasn't sure, but it smelled great. I thought about Amy growing a penis -- which meant starting with visualizing her girl parts the way they were.
After a minute, I said, "OK, let's see what happened."
"Hey!" she said. "It's huge! What happened?"
She was referring to my penis, of course, not hers.
She spread her own labia but naturally saw no evidence of penis growth there. I was intrigued to see a little moisture and darker color.
"That's no good! Now I feel even worse. You have a big, long penis and I don't have one at all! It's not fair!"
She keeled over to her right and pounded her fist on the pillow a couple times before laying her head down and sniffling. "It's not fair! It's not fair!"
.... There is more of this story ...