A big 'Thank You' to Estragon for making this a much better read.
Sometimes you have to wonder who's right, the moralist or the people who say live life to the fullest. I think everyone gets bored at times in their life but it's all about how we handle that boredom, especially in the sexual department.
Going back to my college days, I realize that flirting can be fun. I remember talking with the guys and we would say if we made it to first base or hit a home run with the women we dated. I was from Ohio and going to college in Michigan.
I really didn't do much partying till my junior and senior years. The parties were always fun and I usually got laid before going home. I guess I kind of let my hair down, knowing I'd probably never see these people again.
Yes readers, men talk as much or more than women when it comes to sex. I found out the problems start when you start falling for a particular woman. That's when the kissing, touching and even having sex seems to change.
I was usually a quiet guy, but if I got a little drunk I would make the mistake of telling my buddies about my sexual relationships. Most guys like to talk about their conquests; a few even talked about their latest girlfriends. I guess they just felt there wouldn't be a future with their girlfriends. It was just the college dating scene, and I bet it hasn't changed much.
In my senior year of college I dated Lynn for a few months. It took a while but eventually I got into her pants. It happened at a New Year's Eve party and we brought it in with a bang. I made the mistake of telling the guys. That was like putting a sign on her back that says "She gives out!" I felt bad after I mentioned it. I wish I would have kept my damn mouth shut.
We weren't going together but she was like my girl. I'd dated quite a few girls before her but she was different. I wasn't sure what it was, she was no where near my first, but it felt different with her. She is the one woman I wished I had never told the guys about.
A couple of months later we went to a Valentine's Day party with a lot of the group we hung with and we were all fairly close friends. There were twelve of us in all. If it was to be believed, all of us had had sex with most the women. No one had ever mentioned that they had ever had sex with Lynn except me. At one time or another I did have sex with all six women but not with anyone else since I had been with Lynn.
I remember a few saying they tried but never made it to third base with Lynn. That's what we called getting your hands in a woman's panties. They did they that they had groped her tits from time to time. It was just a party thing. Sometimes the women would flirt and grab the guy's package also.
I never thought much about it till I started getting serious about Lynn. I didn't want to hear about other guys feeling her up or trying to get in her pants. My outlook just began to change. I wasn't able to handle it well.
I was getting serious about Lynn and it was at the Valentine's Day party that I was going to ask her if she wanted to be my girlfriend. I didn't want an engagement or anything like that but I wanted us to be monogamous.
The party was held at one of the big lounges in town and there must have been a hundred or more people there, mostly students from our college. The party was well underway and I must have drunk too much. I sat in the booth and decided to rest a bit.
One thing I should mention about the women in our group. They were all good looking. Different shapes and sizes, but there wasn't any that couldn't turn a guy on. There was always a lot of flirting, light touching and after a few drinks there was some groping.
I had stopped groping the other girls but still flirted after I started being with Lynn. I don't know why but as I said, it was different with her. I could see she would still flirt with the other guys but it didn't seem to go any further.
As the night wore on and I was watching everyone dance, I could see it was getting a little more raunchy. The guys would press up against the girls and I could see their hands at work. It was kind of funny to watch because the guys would try to be subtle but the girls knew what was going on. All the girls wore mini skirts and blouses.
In fact Brandy was taking hold of Brad's package and squeezing it. I looked around for Lynn and I couldn't believe what I was seeing. She was being groped by Andy. By groped I mean she had her back against him and he was rubbing his package against her ass.
There was no doubt she was liking it by the way she kept pushing back against him. He took his hands off her hips and, as moved them up towards her breasts, I began to get an upset stomach. She looked over at me and was smiling. What got to me was I saw Andy take his cock out and kept pushing it against Lynn's ass.
I couldn't take it anymore so I got up and went to the bathroom to throw up. I saw Mark in the men's room and told him I was leaving. I wasn't feeling well.
"Mark, just tell everyone that I had to leave. I'll catch you all later," I said.
After I left I remembered I left Lynn a Valentine's card and a friendship ring on the table. I had it setting there for her when she returned from her dance with Andy. I wasn't about to go back and get it now.
On my way home my cell phone rang. It was Lynn; I didn't answer it. She must have called me a half dozen times. I knew I had to talk to her sometime but I shut my cell phone off and when I turned it on the next day she left me about a half dozen messages.
My phone rang and this time I answered it. "Jake, what's going on? Are you all right? First, Mark's said you went home sick and then I get a beautiful card from you and a friendship ring. I try and call a dozen times but you don't answer. So, what's going on?"
"Lynn, just forget about the card and the ring. It was just a cheap friendship ring. I made a big mistake, I'm sorry. I had stronger feelings for you than I thought. When I saw you on the dance floor with Andy, I realized I made a mistake. I'm sorry. Look, let's just be friends. I don't think we ought to date anymore."
"Jake, I'm sorry. I was just flirting around like we always do. I didn't know Andy had his thing out, honest. The minute I found out I walked away. Nothing happened, I want you to know that," replied Lynn.
I had hung up the phone when she said she didn't know Andy had his cock out. I just didn't want to hear anymore.
The rest of the school year I became more of a loner. I saw the guys from time to time and saw them at a couple of parties. If Lynn was there I never stayed. I just used the excuse that my grades were down and I had to study more. I totally avoided Lynn and she must have got the message because she avoided me after that.
You need to know that I didn't blame Lynn for anything. She didn't do anything wrong. It was just the shit that went through my head. I realized I had feeling for her but was torn when I saw her with Andy.
A couple of times when I did get with the guys and we all drank too much they did mentioned having sex with the girls. Andy even said he made it to third base with Lynn. I don't know how they couldn't see that Lynn was someone special to me. After hearing Andy, I got up and left before I hit him.
After that I was no longer part of the group when they went out. I guess Lynn never told anyone about the ring. I had to wonder what happened to it. I did attend our graduation party. I shook hands and hugged all my buddies and kissed all the girls. When I kissed Lynn it felt special. She didn't let go. God, what was wrong with me?
After graduation I started work as a computer programmer in a local firm here near my home in Ohio. I was good and knew my shit. It wasn't long before I began making a good living. I never kept track of my old Michigan friends, that was a closed book in my life.
I often wondered what had happened to Lynn. What could have been. I was now dating Carol, a woman I met while servicing a customer. She was nice looking and the sex was good but I wasn't in love with her. It just felt like something was missing.
I didn't know if it was love because the closest I've ever had to love was with Lynn. It wasn't the sex with Lynn either, it was the way I felt about her and the kiss at graduation. It was just something I couldn't shake.
Carol must have felt the same way because one day she came up to me and told me we should see other people. She did say the sex was good and we could still see each other until one of us was in a committed relationship.
I had to laugh but I did agree with her. At least we broke up before things got too serious. I kept busy and still dated different women. I lived a pretty full life.
It's been a year and a half since I graduated. I joined an exercise club to keep in shape. One day I ran in to my old friend Mark. He said he moved to Ohio and joined an insurance firm. He hit me up for a policy and I went ahead and bought it. We got to talking and he surprised me. He said he and Sandy (one of the girls in our group) got married just the past summer.
He said he would have invited me to the wedding if he knew where I lived. All he knew is that I moved to Ohio. He invited me over to his home to meet Sandy. It may seem a bit funny but I felt awkward at first, after all I had sex with Sandy more than once and we guys had even talked about it.
It was good to see her and I was surprised that she was pregnant. They really seemed happy. I wish I could have that feeling; that someone special in my life. I asked them if they ever seen any of the old gang and they did say they stayed in contact with a few of them. I asked about Lynn and they said they hadn't heard from her since graduation.
"Jake, you don't have to answer this if you don't feel comfortable but what happened between you and Lynn? She wouldn't talk about it and whenever she came to a party you seemed to have to leave," asked Sandy.
"Sandy, I was falling for her but I think it was one sided. It was hard to be around her, I prefer not to discuss it."
"Well, even though it's too late, you should know that she really did care for you. At least that's what she told me. I just thought you should know," said Sandy.
I had dinner with them and told them maybe we could see each other once in a while. I went back to my condo. I still had to wonder about sex in college. Was it just a phase we go through? Does it change how people act and feel when they get older?
Needless to say Mark and Sandy seemed happy with their lot in life. I guess they both knew they had sex with other people and it didn't bother them. I guess it was part of growing up.
My boss asked me if I would like to go to Indiana for a month. There was a new firm opening up and the work force would all have to be trained using their new programs. It was only three hours away and I could still come home on weekends. They even gave me a company car and would pay for my motel room.
The name of the firm was Baker Manufacturing. They made car parts that were then shipped to Michigan. I was to write and set up an inventory and control program and explain how to use it to the staff.
I met Mr. Baker and he called two of his computer experts in on the meeting. Their accounts receivable, payables and payroll was already in place. They just needed a good distribution program. They already had another plant in Michigan and wanted the programs to coincide and to be compatible and user friendly.
I showed them a couple of programs that we made for other manufacturing companies and they chose one that they thought fit their needs. Now I had to write the program specifically for them.
I was given an office to work out of and my company paid for my motel room and gave me an expense account. I guess I would be eating pretty well. Now all I needed was some female companionship once in awhile in the evenings. Needless to say the company wouldn't be paying for any of those expenses.
Mr. Baker called a meeting of all his executives to meet me and explain what I was doing. I was at the door and Mr. Baker was introducing me to his staff as they walked in. I couldn't believe it when Lynn walked in the door. She was as surprised as I was.
"Jake! What are you doing here?" She gave me a hug.
Mr. Baker caught on quickly. "I take it you two know each other?"
Lynn spoke first, "Yes, Dad, Jake and I graduated from the same university."
My heart was crazy-thumping. I wasn't sure what to say. "It's nice to see you again. I often wondered what happened to you after graduating. Maybe we can get together and talk about old times after the meeting."
I was introduced to some more employees and noticed one man went and sat next to Lynn. Later I found out who it was. Lynn was in charge of human resources. She started in the Michigan plant and later moved to Indiana. Needless to say she was the boss's daughter but she was also very smart besides being beautiful. She was a head-turner for sure.
Mr. Baker started the meeting and introduced me. I stood up and explained that Jerry and Bob, the two computer people from their firm, and I would be setting up a parts distribution and control program. I went over parts of how the program would work and let them know it would be completed within the month. I answered any questions they had and the meeting broke up.
At the door I asked Lynn if she would like to have dinner with me that evening. She said, "Jake, I'm seeing someone, I'm sorry."
Why did that surprise me? She was a beautiful woman, confident and very independent. I know I couldn't hide the look on my face. I tried to smile and say something nice. Hell, I can't even remember what I said.
I went to my office and started on the program with Jerry and Bob. They were both pretty nice guys. They have been with the firm for a few years. Both were married and Bob recently had a son. They had both transferred down from the Michigan plant.
They asked me to join them for lunch. We headed to a restaurant across the street from the business. We walked in at the same time as Lynn and another woman from the office. Bob suggested we all sit together.
They introduced me to Jill and when I sat down Jill sat next to me. I was a couple of seats away from Lynn. Jill was a looker and was of a flirty nature. She had recently graduated from college and started working at Baker Manufacturing as a secretary.
Jerry asked Lynn if we were friends at college. She said we hung around together with a large group of friends. We hadn't seen each other since graduation and she was surprised to see me.
I could feel my heart beating. I knew I had feeling for her even though I didn't want to. I remember her and Andy and she tells me that she seeing someone. I figured it would be best to avoid her as much as possible. I tried to concentrate on my lunch, but couldn't.
Jerry, Bob and I worked on the program. We were making great time and would probably be done in two more weeks. Mr. Baker was very happy to hear that. It would save him quite a bit of money. We were well ahead of schedule.
I talked with Jerry and Bob and they both thought Lynn was a fox. They did tell me if I just wanted to get laid I should ask Jill out. It would be a pretty sure thing. I guess guys never change.
I went home the second weekend. I needed to get away from Lynn. Even though I did my best to avoid seeing her, I would run into her all the time. It seemed difficult for both of us. I went back to Indiana on Sunday night so I could get a good nights sleep for starting back Monday.
I wasn't at the motel a half hour when there was a knock on my door. I answered it and there stood Lynn.
"Jake, we need to talk. May I come in?"
I opened the door and offered her something to drink. "Yes please, make it something strong."
I made us both a screwdriver and we sat down on the couch next to each other. "Lynn you are as beautiful as ever. What is it you want to talk about?"
"You're an asshole!" she said.
My mouth just dropped open. I didn't know what to say.
"You gave me a beautiful Valentine's card and a friendship ring and then left me. You never gave me a chance to tell you what happened. I loved you and you just dumped me!" Her eyes started to water.
I went to hold her and she yelled, "Don't touch me! Why did you leave me? Why didn't you talk to me? You just left like the bastard you are!" Now she was crying.
I knew she wouldn't let me touch her so I handed her the box of tissues. "Lynn, let me explain. I was going to give you the ring so we might be monogamous. When I looked up I saw Andy, with his cock out, rubbing it against your ass. At the same time he was going for your tits."