Teaching has great benefits that far outweigh the costs. I know that not everybody enjoys those benefits in the same way, but there is a thrill that comes when your students "get it." When that light bulb goes on over their head and you can see that what you've tried to share has been received, there is a sense of incredible happiness that floods your soul and lets you know that you have done well.
Of course, there are other benefits, as well, that extend beyond the altruistic.
When I started teaching college, I was living with someone and so I worked to keep any potential feelings I might have for my female students in check. Within one semester, however, my relationship had deteriorated to the point that it was time to call it quits. We agreed to the separation near the beginning of the semester and she had moved out by the end.
During that period of emotional separation between our separation agreement and the physical separation, I went on a roller coaster of emotions. I was hurt and angered by the separation, but was also looking forward to the future and possibilities with other women.
Of course, I continued to teach, but I began to look at my students in a different light. There are rules about the interactions between teachers and students so I had to keep my thoughts and ideas to myself, but there were definitely a few students that caught my eye time and again. There was the beautiful blonde in my evening class who had an amazing body, a beautiful face, a great smile, and a fun attitude. The brunette with the bright, blue eyes and smile that lit up the room also caught my attention. There was the beautiful, young woman with class who always dressed a little differently, but carried herself with poise, and she was fun to look at during the day. In my other evening class, there was the young woman who sat in the front and would wear low-cut shirts during the warm months, inviting some looks. The skinny girl who had an angular face and light, blue eyes really caught my attention on Halloween when she showed up in a costume that barely accented her natural beauty, but made her look very sexy. It just led my mind to wander down forbidden paths time and again.
Exam days were my favorites. I would bring in the exams and hand them out then sit in the front of the room and just watch my students work on their exams. Ostensibly, I was watching for cheating, wandering eyes, etc. The reality is that I didn't care too much about that. I was a little more interested in figuring out what made my students tick. I like to study people and I had hours during exam days to do just that. The young blonde in my evening class would stretch and pop her back, which did very interesting things with her body. It was fun to see her move during those times. The brunette would get serious while doing her exams, but would give me a wonderful smile when she looked up and our eyes met. That always made me feel good inside.
I needed to be very careful with my actions, though. I didn't want to lose my job because I really enjoyed teaching. So I kept my thoughts to myself and created fantasies in the recesses of my mind.
When I got the e-mail from the brunette for some special help, I had my teacher hat on and wasn't thinking anything untoward might happen. I was just interested in helping her understand the information better, so I worked with her to find the best time to get together. We arranged to meet after class the next Thursday.
When Thursday arrived, I treated it like any other day. I took care of my tutoring in the morning then prepared for class. When I got there, it felt like a normal class period and we proceeded to cover the scheduled material in the book. I had a great time going over the information and we had a good class. There was good participation and we laughed a few times as we discussed the benefits of solving equations by completing the square. We finished the discussion a bit early and so I let everyone go, knowing that my students had other things they'd like to be doing.
I had just about forgotten that I was going to help my student until I looked up from packing my things and erasing the board to find her still sitting at her desk. That's when I remembered that I had agreed to help. When I get to teaching, I get so caught up in the math and the discussion that I often forget the rest of life.
I went over and sat near her, smiling as I did so. She looked up at me and flashed me that smile that lights up the room and my heart skipped a little beat. I reminded myself that she was a student and that I needed to keep this about math.
"I would do anything to pass this class," she said with a smile that conveyed her hope of passing, but with a little something extra hidden in there.
I had hoped that one of my students would say that ever since I had read a joke years prior to my starting work as a teacher.
"Anything?" I asked with a smile, looking deep into her eyes.
Her breath caught a little at that and she looked at my face and I could tell she was pondering things. She finally came to an obvious decision and looked at my mouth, softly licked her lips, then looked back up at my eyes.
"Anything," she answered softly.
"Would you..." I asked, pausing for effect, " ... study?"
Then I broke into a grin.
She looked shocked for a bit then broke out laughing.
"I guess that would be the right way to go about getting a good grade, wouldn't it?" she asked with a chuckle.
We had a good chuckle at that then went on to study algebra for a bit. With the one-on-one help, she was able to better understand what we were talking about and could do the work very well by the end of an hour together.
By the time we finished, I could feel my stomach rumbling. I hadn't eaten for quite a while and my stomach was reminding me that it was time to eat! She heard my stomach and laughed softly.
"Hungry?" she asked. "I live close by, you could come over for dinner. I'll put something together for us."
Having just had a wonderful session in which we concentrated on math, it never occurred to me that she was asking for anything out of the ordinary. It just made sense that someone would care about another and want them to be happy, even if that meant fixing them dinner.
"That sounds terrific," I said, looking forward to a good meal. There hadn't been many good meals at my house in some time.
"If you'd like, you can just follow me," she said, "it's just a few miles away."
We walked out of the building and to our cars. I started mine up and pulled out of the parking spot then drove over to where she was parked. She was just getting ready to pull out so I slid in behind her. The drive was short and fairly straightforward.
When we pulled up to her house, I watched her pull into the garage and I parked in front of her house. I then got out and met her at the garage then followed her inside. She sure was fun to follow. It brought to mind the line from the movie, Face Off, in which John Travolta says, "I hate to see you go, but I love to watch you leave."
I managed to pull my eyes up from her shapely curves just before she turned around so that I wasn't caught ogling her. It would not have been good for my fantasies to come out and scare a student. I would have hated to have her get nervous and go to the administration with negative comments about me as a teacher.
She went about getting settled then started preparing a meal of stir-fried vegetables and chicken over rice. I offered to help, but could easily see that she was comfortable doing the work, herself, and that I would more likely just get in the way. She declined my offer to help, but was obviously pleased that I had offered.
Of course, every time she'd turn around, I couldn't help but look at her curves. I almost got caught a couple of times, but thought I had managed to get away with it. I knew that I needed to keep things on the up and up, but as a man, I couldn't help but be attracted to such a beautiful woman. I just needed to be sure that she didn't become aware of my attraction while she was my student.
When dinner was ready, she took our plates to the table and we sat and proceeded to eat. Our conversation spanned a number of topics, generally about our lives and what we had done that led us to the positions we were in at that point. It was a real pleasure talking with her and learning about her. She was an amazing woman and I was very pleased that I had the chance to get to know her.
As dinner wrapped up, I stood and carried my dishes to the sink to rinse them.
"Oh, you don't have to do that," she said.
I just smiled at her and continued rinsing.
"Well, thank you," she said, flashing me that winning smile again.
My heart swelled at the smile and I was more than compensated for the minor task I'd done.
When the dishes were in the dishwasher, she asked if I'd like to sit on the couch for a bit to continue our talk. At that point, I was just so happy to be with someone who was happy and wanted to hear what I had to say that I wasn't about to run out of there.
After talking for a bit on the couch, she reached over and put her hand on mine. She looked deep into my eyes and said, "you know, I really will do anything ... and not just to pass your class."
I don't know what came over me at that point. All thought of my teaching career fled my mind. I wanted this amazing woman in my arms. I craved the feeling of her lips on mine.
.... There is more of this story ...