I am going back and reworking some of my older stories. This is the first one I have redone. It is still basically the same story as before, I think it flows better now. S tara

It was a hot Monday afternoon in late June when Jack entered the university library and as the door closed behind him the cool air of the air-conditioned building felt refreshing. Standing inside the old structure, he recalled it had been six years since he’d been back to his old university. Heading down to the basement, it smelled exactly as he remembered. In addition, as always it was the coolest place on campus. Jack wandered through the stacks of books while old smells and sounds engulfed him, reminding him of an old, dear, cherished, familiar friend. Stopping for a moment, opened his mind to a flood of great memories as an underclassman.

Since graduating, Jack had taken classes off and on at the local extension university while he’d been teaching, but this summer he returned to his alma mater, hoping to finally complete his master’s degree. Being back on campus was a rush of nostalgia. When Jack was an undergraduate, he’d found an area down in the bowels of the ancient building with a couple of old tables stuck in a back corner. This was where he studied, did his research, and basically hung out. Wandering to the back of the basement, he wondered if the tables were still there.

It was so cool in the basement, and the temperature was so different from the outside, he wished he was wearing a sweater. Jack rounded the end of one of the stacks and the two massive old tables were still sitting exactly where they’d been when he’d used them six years ago. However, there was one thing different today. Sitting at one of the tables was a young lady. A stunningly attractive young lady with long, honey-blond hair, a powder blue V-necked sweater showing excellent cleavage and when she looked up at him, she revealed beautiful blue eyes the same color as her sweater. Her face was flawless, and her perfume teased his nostrils with its scent. In the darken recesses of the library, Jack thought she looked like a vision.

Jack stood staring at the young lady for a long time and finally she asked, “Is there something wrong?”

He blushed as he murmured, “I’m sorry. I don’t wish to be rude. Back in the day when I was an undergraduate, I used to hang out down here and study. I just didn’t expect to find anybody here. And to find somebody here ... somebody as lovely as you, well...” His voice trailed off lamely.

The young lady’s cheeks took on a flush of their own and she looked down. When she looked up, he was again struck with her loveliness. “Are you back here for more studies or...” Her voice died without finishing the sentence.

“I teach at Stewart High School over in Bedford Falls. I’m here for the summer to finish my Masters. Are you a student here this summer?” After he asked, he realized what a stupid question; why would such a good-looking woman be sitting down in the basement of an old library on a day like this if she didn’t have to?

Her smile was warm and friendly, “This quarter and I’m finished with my degrees.”

“What’s your major?”

“I have two...”

Jack interrupted, “Two? Wow! That’s impressive. All I’ve got is a degree in US History and minor in psych.” He hung his head in mock shame.

“That’s great. I always enjoyed history. Are you any good at it?”

Jack grinned at her, “Well, I guess I am. I teach high school and I’m also the head football coach... ‘Go Tigers’!” Jack gave an embarrassed laugh and the young lady giggled.

Jack continued, “I hate to admit it, but that’s my true love. Teaching history got me in the door. I love history mind you, but getting youth to see why it’s interesting is a real challenge.” When she laughed, her laugh sounded like soft music. Jack stepped forward, stuck out his hand, “I’m Jack, Jack Frost.” His name put a huge grin on her face. Jack held up his hand in front of his chest and replied sheepishly, “I know ... I know, what can I say, my parents had a sense of humor. Let me tell you, junior high sucks when your name’s Jack Frost. But now, it isn’t so bad. Coach Frost has a nice ring to it.”

She held out her hand and when he looked down, he saw well manicured nails, lovely long tapered fingers, and a most interesting ring on her middle finger. “Tara, Tara Howard.” He grinned back at her, she quickly continued, “My mother loved the movie ‘Gone with the Wind’. I teased her one time she was probably watching the movie when I was conceived, and she was a little angry I’d say such a thing.” Again, the musical laugh and Jack laughed with her. He looked down at his watch and noticed he needed to get going if he was to make his next class on time.

“Tara, I hate to end this, but if I don’t leave now, I’ll be late for my next class.” Jack was surprised by the look on her face; she seemed sad and looked almost like she was going to cry. He did want to see her again and he asked, “Do you come here often?”

“Yeah, this is my hiding place too. I can study here without being bothered and...”

Jack interrupted, “Oh damn, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you...”

She held up her hand, “No ... not you.” She gave him a quick glimpse of her killer smile, “I’ve enjoyed our little talk. I like it down here so I’m here off and on.”

“Would you like to meet for a cup of coffee after class?” Jack asked hopefully.

She paused so long he wondered if she’d heard him. Finally, she frowned and replied, “That sounds wonderful, but I already have plans. Sorry.”

Jack figured it was true, as her “Sorry.” sounded sincere; he said goodbye and headed off to class. Over the next few days, he returned often to the back of the library, but she was never there. Their brief encounter had left an indelible imprint on Jack; he desperately wanted to see her again.

On Monday morning on his way to school, he remembered it was last Monday when he met Tara. Not a day passed since he’d met her, he didn’t think about her; her beauty seared into his memory. Jack wanted to know her better ... to be able to talk to her some more. After his class, he ran down the stairs to the basement and headed back to his old haunt. Walking between the stacks he wondered if she’d be there. His heart leaped when he found her sitting at the big table exactly in the same place as last time.

“Good afternoon Tara, I was hoping you’d be here today.”

“Hello Jack.” A slight pause, and then, “Why were you hoping I’d be here today?

“Well...” Jack felt just like a schoolboy he was so embarrassed and tongue-tied. Finally, he just blurted it out, “I’ve thought about you every day since last Monday and I’ve checked down here several times to see if you were here. I really wanted to see you again.”

The smile spreading across her face made Jack feel he’d said the correct thing. “Well ... aren’t you sweet. Sit down?”

Jack sat across from her, and their conversation flowed like a gentle stream right from the start. He was surprised to find as beautiful as she was, there was no guile about her. She was completely down to earth with a delightful sense of humor. As they talked Jack felt her good looks were almost a hindrance. Tara was just as attractive and lovely inside as she was to the eye. Time passed quickly and when he glanced at his watch, he realized he’d missed his next class and his surprise shown on his face.

“What’s the matter?”

“I got so caught up I missed my class.”

“Is that bad?”

“Well, to be honest, I’d rather be here.” His comment brought the musical laugh again. Jack continued, “Ah, I have a question ... and I really don’t know how to ask it any way except to just ask.”

“And your question?”

“Are you like involved, or seeing anybody or engaged or...”

Tara held up her hand to stop his babbling. “No. I’m none of the above. Are you ... how did you put it ... involved?”

“No. I thought I found the person I wanted to marry, but at the last minute I realized she wasn’t the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. One more question. How come somebody as exquisite as you, and as interesting as you hasn’t been snapped up yet?”

Again, the musical laugh, “Just hasn’t happened ... don’t know what to tell you.”

Jack really had to get going but he didn’t want their meeting to end. Timidly he asked her if they could meet for a cup of coffee, and she politely declined. He asked her if there were any other times she was in the library. “I’m here usually on Thursdays. I have a late afternoon class and then come here. I’m here after 5. Why?”

“Because next Monday is so far away!” She laughed. “I’m sorry, I have to go.” He stood, leaned over and picked up her hand and brought it to his lips. “Until Thursday?”

“We’ll see,” One last killer smile and Jack left.

Over the years and all during school, Jack dated several women and had many girlfriends. He always felt comfortable with women. Jack was a handsome man who played sports all through school and still moved with the grace and poise of a natural athlete. Being a coach allowed him to work out at the high school gym and he still possessed a lean, strong body.

Jack hadn’t found the right woman, but if asked, he’d just say he was picky. He held the romantic notion one day he’d meet the woman of his dreams. Right now, he had to admit, Tara was coming close. Closer than any woman so far. However, the question was, how could he meet her away from the library?

Thursday seemed to take forever to arrive. All during his class he kept looking at the wall clock and the class drug on forever. Finally, the professor released the class and he quickly headed across campus to the library.

He came to the end of the stacks and Tara was sitting at the table. Today she wore a cute top that showed off an abundant amount of cleavage. Her hair was in a ponytail, and he thought she looked cute the way she was dressed. She smiled at him and motioned for him to sit. He pulled up a chair and their conversation resumed like they hadn’t been apart for four days. Finally, it was time for Jack to get going and he asked Tara once more if he could meet her for a cup of coffee. Once more, she politely declined. As he parted, he asked if she would be there on Monday, and she said she would.

In the past, Jack always felt weekends went by entirely too quickly, but this weekend seemed to drag. Monday’s classes were just as bad and by the time he could head for the library, Jack was surprised how badly he wanted to see Tara. Heading across campus, he wondered if sharing some of his feelings would help her understand why he wanted to see her away from the library.

Rounding the stacks, Tara was sitting at one of the tables. A warm smile lit up her face and Jack felt she was pleased to see him. Her hair was down today, and she was wearing a sweater almost the same color as her hair. Around her neck was a band of blue velvet the same color as her eyes. Jack thought if he wasn’t already smitten, he shurely would have fallen for her today.

The time they shared together passed quickly and finally Jack realized how late it was. Decided he was going to take a chance and share his feelings about Tara, he tired to put them into words. “Tara...” He started, long pause, “Um ... I’m developing strong feelings for you.” He paused again searching for the right words to convey his feelings. “I’d like for us to meet some place else besides here...” Jack motioned with his hand, indicating the basement of a library, “Um, a date if you will. I feel you like me, and I know I like you and...”

Tara hung her head and when she looked up, Jack thought he saw a tear in her eye. “Jack, I can’t. I can’t tell you any more than that, and I ask you ... I beg you ... if you really care ... you won’t ask for any more information. Please...” Her voice was soft and pleading.

“Tara, I don’t understand. In one breath, you tell me you like me, and in the next, you tell me you won’t see me away from the library. Is it you don’t trust me?”

“Jack, please don’t ask questions. Please...” Now there were tears brimming in her eyes. Jack stood up, looked down at her for a moment and told her he needed to get going.

As he turned to leave, she asked, “Will you be back on Thursday?” Her voice was so soft Jack barely heard her.

“Why?” His voice was much softer than the feelings he had inside.

“I understand if you won’t ... maybe someday I can explain ... but I do enjoy our conversations and if you still want ... Thursday?” the last word was more of a question than a statement.

Jack knew he wanted to see her again. Somehow, he was going to find out why she wouldn’t leave the basement. He nodded, “Till Thursday. Good night Tara.” Jack turned and left.

On Thursday, Jack had a mid-term test. The instructor told the class once they were through with the test, they were free to leave. This was Jack’s favorite class, and he was well prepared and breezed right through. When he exited the classroom, he realized he was going to be almost an hour earlier than usual. Because it was earlier than normal, he wondered if Tara would even be there. He hoped so because it would give them more time together.

When Jack turned the corner to walk down the row between the last stack, his heart skipped a beat. Tara was there and she was standing in front of him at the far end of the stack facing the other way. Walking towards her Jack noticed she was wearing a different sweater today along with a skirt of matching color. She started to take a step and her body dipped slightly. Her action made Jack stop and look down at her legs. Her right leg was bent and disfigured, and her right shoe was built up to help compensate for the difference with her left leg. Tara took another step, again with the noticeable limp. Jack came up behind her and when she became aware she wasn’t alone, she whirled around. Jack wasn’t prepared for what happened next.

Tara’s face crumbled and she moaned, “It’s you! Oh no!” Tara’s hands went to her face, and she bent her head and her shoulders started to shake and she began to cry. Jack instantly stepped forward to slip his arms around her and try to comfort her. She put a hand on his chest, pushing him back.

“No, please go.” She cried. “You don’t have to stay. You’ve seen me now; you don’t have to be nice to the cripple.” Tara continued to sob.

Jack swept her hands from his chest and gathered her into his arms. Looking down at the top of her head, he was stunned by her actions. He kissed the top of her head and whispered, “Hey, please stop crying. What’s this all about?” A thought occurred and he asked, “Is this why you wouldn’t meet me away from here? You didn’t want me to see you had a limp, see your leg?”

Jack felt her nodding against his chest as she continued to softly cry. Her words were difficult to make out as she spoke against his chest. “I wanted to see you some more. I wanted to have a few more meetings before you found out. Because you didn’t know it was easy to pretend you cared about me and ... and ... and...” Her tears came again, and she sobbed to the point where she couldn’t speak.

Jack pulled her tightly against his chest again and gently rocked her back and forth. So many things made sense now, why she refused to see him away from the library, why she had always been behind the desk when he arrived. In the softest and his most gentle voice, he whispered, “Tara, darling, for a person of your intellect, you know, you really are rather stupid.” She stopped sobbing and looked up at him, tears still brimming in her eyes.

“Excuse me, I’ve never been called stupid!” Even though her lip was quivering, Jack was pleased to see she still stood up to his insult.

“Can’t you tell?” Jack asked as Tara dropped her head. “Look at me ... don’t you see I care about you? The person inside? The package is cute, but I don’t shit, excuse me, about the limp. or your leg. Tara, to me those are not who or what you are. Listen to me, I have feelings for you. Do you understand?”

Her bottom lip was still quivering, and she hiccupped. “I didn’t want to ... I tried so hard. I wanted to be just a friend. I didn’t want to care for you the way I do. I knew once you found out about ... well ... you know, you could never be interested in a cripple ... an...”

“Tara, all right, now I know. And I hope you understand it doesn’t matter. Now, can WE get the hell out of this dungeon and go someplace together a bit more fun?” Jack had stressed the word, ‘we’.

“You still want to be seen with me?” Her voice showed surprise and her pleasure at his request.

Jack tipped her face up and gazed into her eyes. Slowly he lowered his lips to hers and kissed her gently on the lips. His lips parted slightly, and as he touched her lips with his tongue, he felt her tongue tentatively move against his. As their tongues gently touched, she whimpered softly. When he pulled away, Tara was breathing deeply, and her face was flushed. “Does that answer your question?” He asked as he squeezed her body.

Tara gathered her belongings and showed Jack to the elevator which she took from floor to floor to help her gain access around the library. He carried her stuff and she held onto his other arm. They walked into the student union and sat down at a corner table. She asked for a soda, and he went off to get them both one.

When he returned, Jack found one of his classmates talking to Tara. His classmate turned and asked him how he felt Jack did on the test. Jack explained how much he liked the subject and why he felt he aced it. The classmate turned to Tara and asked, “Why is this beautiful lady wasting her time with you?”

Tara smiled as Jack made the introductions and as the classmate left, he looked at Tara and told her, “If you ever get tired of this oaf, give me a call. You are stunning.”

Jack smiled at her. “See, I don’t think he even noticed your ... ah...”

“Say it, my limp. If we are ever going to go anywhere together, you need to get over...”

Jack interrupted her, “Wow! Ain’t this the kettle calling the pot black?”

Tara dropped her head for a moment, when she looked back at Jack; she had a warm smile on her face. “Thanks. I was so afraid once you knew, once you saw me ... Jack, all my life I’ve been ashamed.”

“Please tell me what happened?”

Tara told him about the accident when she was 12 years old when she was riding her bike home at dusk, and about the drunk who struck her with his car. She told him about the massive settlement the court had awarded her due to his considerable wealth and his many prior convictions for drunk driving. “I really don’t have to go to school if I don’t want too. There is such a vulgar amount of money just sitting making more money.”

She smiled at him and went on to tell him at one time the doctors thought she might lose her leg and then how they were finally able to save it.

Tara continued to explain how the doctors were very sorry nothing could be done, but the leg would be shorter, even though part of it could be compensated for with a built up shoe, there would still be a noticeable limp.

“I’ve always been so self conscious about it. I always felt that was all people saw ... not me, just my handicap. Mama always told me I was going to be a spinster ... she said nobody wants to be with a cripple ... handicapped people like me are supposed to live alone.”

Jack smiled at her and told her, “The only handicap I see is you are so good looking, I find it hard to concentrate when we talk.”

Tara giggled and put her hand on Jack’s arm. He placed his hand over hers and squeezed. “Thanks. Thanks for coming here with me.” As they sat talking, nursing their drinks, Jack found himself continuing to fall for this lovely lady sitting across from him. Once he stopped mid-sentence and told her, “Do you have any idea what I think of you. I just can’t believe you’re sitting here with me. I can’t believe how lucky I am.”

Tara smiled at him and shook her head, “No ... I’m the lucky one. Look at you. I’ll even bet you were a jock all through school? Right?”

“Yeah, but what’s that got to do with anything.” His face looked puzzled.

“I’ve always felt all the jocks looked down at me. In both junior and in high school I was the poor little cripple girl. Because I couldn’t participate in PE class, I was teased. I didn’t even start to develop,” She motioned towards her lovely breasts, “These until I started my senior year in high school. I took a lot of teasing and when you told me you were a high school football coach, it just took me back to a time I’ve really tried to forget.”

“Oh God. I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.” Tara put her finger against Jack’s lips. “Shhhh ... stop. I told you so you could understand a little more about me. I was always jealous of jocks. To me, jocks seemed to be so at ease in every situation. However, when you sat down that first day and we talked, it was like you were no longer a jock, you became a real person, with wants, desires, and feelings, it was such a revelation. You went from a thing to a real person. You hadn’t seen my handicap and I was able to look beyond you being an athlete. I started to feel things about you I knew I couldn’t do anything about.”

“Please! Stop! You’re telling me you ... ah ... care about me? That you have feelings for me? Too??”

Tara blushed and nodded. “Yes, but I felt it was hopeless. Once you saw me standing, that would be the end. I wanted to try and keep your visits going as long as I could. Mama warned me about men and once you saw my handicap, you would either leave, or use me and then leave.”

“In a way I guess I’m a little hurt. You didn’t even give me the chance to show you I might be different. But to be honest, getting to know you as I have, all I see is your beauty, your intellect and your lovely sense of humor. I got to know you, and your ... well, your limp never got in the way of getting to know you. Now I don’t care. It is part of you, it’s something that makes you unique ... special ... more mysterious.”

“You do know how to turn a girl’s head. I never thought of my handicap as unique or special and never, ever mysterious.” She laughed and Jack enjoyed the sound and the knowledge he was able to make her laugh.

“Will you let me take you to dinner?”

“Do you really want to?” She asked with trepidation.

Jack interrupted, “Look, can we make a deal? If I ask you something, I mean it. I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to do whatever I’m asking. So, if I ask you to dinner, I asked you because I want to take you. Because I ask, you may assume I want to. Now, will you let me take you to dinner?”

The way she answered almost broke his hear, “Yes Jack. I’d love to.”

Jack took her to an old favorite restaurant of his. He hadn’t been able to afford going there very often when he was in school, but he really liked the ambiance of the place. They were shown to a booth and Jack slid in first and asked Tara to sit next to him. He explained why he slid in first, “That way you don’t have to move so far.”

“You need to stop being so thoughtful, I just might decide to keep you.”

The manager stopped by the table. “Mr. Frost, it has been a long time. Nice to see you again,”

Tara spoke up, “It’s Coach Frost.”

The owned laughed, “My apologies sir, it’s still wonderful to see you again.”

Dinner was delicious. There was a bottle of wine to go with the excellent Italian food and afterwards they sat looking at each other. Jack leaned over and kissed her softly on the mouth. When he started to draw away, she reached behind his head and pulled him back and kissed him. When they drew apart, she drew a heavy breath. “What was that for?” he asked.

“I need to tell you something, and I don’t really know how to go about it.”

“How about you start at the beginning?”

“Well, I haven’t been on many dates. I only had a few dates in high school, and they were all a disaster. Mother was right, all they wanted was, well you know?” Jack nodded. “I’ve had a few dates here too. There was one young man here at school I dated a couple of times ... well, no ... wait, he was more of a boy, anyway, we went on three dates and on the third one, he took me to his room and...” Jack could tell by the way she fidgeted it was a memory that still bothered her.

“Did he rape you?”

“NO! He told me I was lucky to be with him as most men didn’t want to waste time with a cripple like me, and then he started to paw me and when he tried to pull on my clothing, I was able to kick him in the ... well, you know ... down there.” And she pointed to his lap. “After that I never excepted any offers to go on a date.”

“So, you’re telling me you haven’t’ dated much?”

“No Jack, I’m trying to tell you I’m a virgin. I’ve read a lot of men don’t like teaching a woman how ... well, you know, do those kinds of things.”

Jack couldn’t help himself and he smiled, “Well, I haven’t read any books on the subject. In addition, I’m sure there a lot of men who are much better at ‘those kinds of things’ as you call it than I am. If, and when it comes time, just promise me you won’t worry. Okay?”

Tara laughed, “If, and when huh? So, you think there might be an ‘if’ or ‘a when’?”

Now it was Jack’s turn to be embarrassed. Tara enjoyed watching him squirm, seeing how uncomfortable he was. She leaned close and whispered, “I hope some day there is an ‘if or when’.”

The evening sped by and soon it was time to take Tara home. Sitting in the car in front of her house, he asked her, “Where do we go from here? I want to see you again, tomorrow?” They compared schedules and agreed to meet after their classes.

The next few days flew by as Jack and Tara had dinner together every evening. Jack wanted to take the relationship to a different level, but he also didn’t want to frighten Tara. When she told him about the attempted rape, she didn’t seem to upset, but he wanted to make sure the time was right when they finally made love.

Jack decided he wanted to take Tara some place special. For the few days they had been together, Tara was pleased with the way Jack treated her, but she still had the doubts, doubts planted by her parents over so many years. Tara could still hear her mother’s words ringing in her ears, “Honey, remember you are handicapped. Men don’t want to live with a cripple. Men will take advantage of you and after they get what they want, they’ll leave you. To them, women like you are to be used. Men know handicapped women will be desperate ... easy to take advantage of. Remember, men don’t marry cripples.” Years and years of hearing that took their toll and Tara couldn’t help but wonder when Jack was going to leave her. Desperately she wanted to believe her mother was wrong, but her mother’s words kept returning to haunt her. All the years of negative programming had done their job to alter her beliefs.

Jack planned to take Tara to a very special restaurant. The semester would be over in a couple of weeks and Jack wanted to make their relationship more permanent. He wanted her to move to Bedford Falls and live with him. Jack picked a restaurant, which featured a massive deck across the front with a commanding view of the bay and the mountains in the distance. He checked what time sundown was and made reservations for a front table, making sure they’d be seated in time to watch the sunset.

Jack picked her up and was pleased with her outfit. She was wearing her down with the blue velvet band around her neck and a dress showing off her cleavage to its best advantage. When she opened her front door, Jack stood gaping at her. “What?” She asked, “You don’t like the outfit?”

“Like? No dear, I don’t like it, I love it! You’re beautiful.” Her smile warmed his heart, and he leaned forward to kiss her. When they pulled apart, he whispered, “And you smell divine.”

“And you look handsome, and you don’t smell so bad yourself.” She pulled his face down and kissed him again.

They arrived at the restaurant; the valet took his car and they entered the restaurant arm in arm. The table was perfect. There was nothing to obstruct their view of the setting sun, or the passing ships in the distance. When the sun finally slipped behind the distant mountains Tara leaned close and kissed Jack’s cheek. “Do it again daddy, that was beautiful.”

“If I could make it happen, I’d do it over and over for you if that’s what you wanted.”

“Jack, the past few days have been like a dream for me. I’ve never been so happy, so at peace with things. For the first time in my life, I don’t curse my leg or the person who did this to me. For the first time, I don’t care. You gave me that. You’ve helped me and I adore you for it.” Tara wanted to add how she didn’t expect their relationship to last very long, but she kept it to herself. Her mother’s words continued to dampen hopes for any long-term relationship.

This seemed to be the perfect time for Jack, “I have a question,” Jacks words chilled Tara’s heart. “I understand if you don’t want to do this, or it’s too soon, but in a couple of weeks the semester is ending, and I’ll be going back to Bedford Falls.” Tara looked at Jack with trepidation. She knew the season was ending and she wondered what was going to happen to the two of them. Tara knew would leave at the end of the end of the term and she’d resisted her desire to take the relationship to the next level. She was still positive what her mother had told her, eventually he was going to leave her, but she’d really enjoyed the time she’d shared with Jack.