I sat and pondered the twists of fate that change our world. We do our best to form our world to our liking, picking and choosing how we are going to maneuver through the obstacles of life. Sometimes, that's just not enough to make the ending we crave.
Is it fate?
I didn't know what it was, but things were changing and I felt like I was being left behind. It's not my call and I'm not in the right position to request that the changes not happen.
She was leaving.
We'd known each other for years. We'd worked together. We'd played together.
For me, it was attraction at first contact. As a matter of fact, just about every time I heard "Love at First Feel," by AC/DC, my thoughts turned to her. There was something in that first meeting that sparked intense interest in me. When I found myself reminiscing about that first meeting, I would start to feel the same feelings of excitement that I'd had that day.
They say there's no such thing as love at first sight. The best, they offer, is that there would be lust at first sight. With her, however, there was something deeper that struck an emotional chord with me. I yearned to be near her and to experience the joy that I felt whenever I heard her laugh or saw that twinkle in her eye.
Granted, she's beautiful. It would have been strange for me to not feel physical desire for her, to want to experience her body. However, I couldn't ignore that stronger feeling I felt on another level.
After hearing that she was moving, I found myself often thinking back to my time with her. We'd not always stayed in really close contact, occasionally finding distance between us, but we always came back together.
It was my fault, too. Well, to be fair, I should say it was due to my actions and words that we found distance between us. I recognized that strong connection between us early on and wasn't too shy about sharing my feelings. Unfortunately, she was unprepared to hear such things and would get scared, moving away for a bit to let the feelings settle. It hurt, but I thought I understood.
I told myself that she was scared of the feelings she had, the desires she felt to return those same sentiments, so she would distance herself so she wouldn't have to face them. It helped me to feel that she wanted me, too, but wasn't in a position to accept such heartfelt words of deep affection.
We would return. We still made each other smile and have warm, happy thoughts. We couldn't stay apart forever. Perhaps I was just so persistent and she'd give in to the feelings I evoked ... for a while.
When she told me she was leaving, she also told me that I was the most supportive and caring person she had in this part of the world. I could feel her affection towards me when she said that. It warmed my heart and fueled the fires within me.
I tried to control those fires. They're powerful, though, and not always easy to control.
Before long, I found myself checking my e-mail on a regular basis, wishing I could see her name on the return address. The longer I waited for a response from her, the more I yearned to hear her voice or read her words.
I wanted to be with her, to hold her in my arms, to caress her. I wanted her with me.
Finally, the e-mail I'd been awaiting arrived.
My heart leapt in my chest and I quickly clicked the message to open it.
She'd told me that she was going to corrupt me before she left in three weeks. I didn't drink, didn't smoke, didn't do drugs. I was a "good, little boy," and she was more than willing to help me get over that and enjoy some of the things that she'd found most pleasant in life.
Her e-mail reiterated her desire to corrupt me and suggested we start that Friday night. I grinned in spite of myself. It looked like I was in for a very good three weeks. I responded that I was looking forward to whatever she was going to do to and with me. We agreed to meet at a restaurant near her house that served terrific steaks and sandwiches.
"It's always good," she said with a laugh, "to start the debauchery on a full stomach!"
I figured that was the best way for me to keep at least a modicum of control over myself. I'd heard that drinking on an empty stomach increases the effects dramatically. I assumed that other substances had the same results.
When Friday rolled around, I was anxious and excited. I had no idea what I was going to experience, but I wanted so much to be with her that it didn't really matter. I trusted her to take care of me and to make sure that I was well pleased.
Dinner was terrific. Her eyes danced with excitement and sent shivers of anticipation down my spine. I could tell she had some wonderful things planned for us.
While we ate, we talked and laughed and found our legs intertwining under the table. It felt good to have that physical touch, a reminder of our proximity and affection for each other.
When the waiter asked if we wanted dessert, I looked to her to see if she wanted anything and she shook her head.
"I have dessert all ready at home," she said with a wink.
"Fair enough," I said with a grin. Looking at the waiter, I said, "we'll just take the check."
We walked out to our cars, arm in arm, and I felt like I was on top of the world. Having her on my side felt amazing. We hugged at our cars and she said, "Just follow me. We'll head over to my place for dessert."
Then she kissed me. The world disappeared when her soft lips touched mine and nothing mattered but the feel of her body pressed against me and her lips melding with mine.
I'm sure I looked like the Cheshire Cat when we broke our kiss. I felt so good at that point.
We drove over to her house and, at her signal, I parked behind her car in the driveway. I got out and followed her to the front door, which she opened to admit us.
Her house is amazing. I couldn't imagine a better way to decorate it. It was designed for enjoyment, with a pool table in a front room, music wired through the house, a music room in the back with a drum set and guitar. The posters on the walls were of bands and suggested any number of pleasurable delights. The kitchen, just off the front room, was well organized and led to the back, where a pool was glistening in the setting sun. It looked like a place I would love to come home to every day.
"I thought a perfect cap to dinner would be brownies and milk," she said, leading me into the kitchen. "I made them this afternoon and they should still be warm."
They were delicious! I ate a couple of them and washed them down with cold milk. It really was the perfect dessert.
"How about we play a little pool?" I asked. It was always one of my favorite games, though I didn't get to play as often as I'd like.
"Good idea," she said. "Let me get some music going and change into something comfortable. Rack 'em up. I'll be right back."
Very soon, I heard Tom Petty coming out of the speaker system and grinned. We'd shared our love of his music some time ago and I was pleased she'd remembered.
As I finished preparing to play, I heard her come out of the back room. I turned to look at her, a comment about the music dying on my lips. She was a vision! She'd changed into a swimsuit and had a wrap around her waist. Her breasts filled the bikini top and spilled around the outside, drawing my attention. Her skin looked incredibly soft and my hand started to reach towards her before I realized what I was doing.
She stopped in the doorway and did a little turn for me. "You like?" she asked.
"Oh yeah," I said, wishing I could be more coherent. "You're beautiful!" I gushed.
She blushed a bit and grinned. "Why, thank you, kind sir," she said.
She came up to me and wrapped her arms around me. "I'm glad you're here," she said, softly. "Ready to lose a little pool?"
I laughed, dropping back to reality. The competitive side of me turned my mind to the game and I was finally able to think again. We shot for the break and she won, so I stood back and watched the table as she lined up for the first shot of the game. I got distracted by the curve of her body and forgot to watch the shot, though I did hear a couple of balls fall in the pockets.
"I'm stripes," she said with a smile, "and already have two in."
I watched her sink two more in a row before missing one. My work was cut out for me. Luckily, I managed to get my head in the game while I studied the table. It looked like I could get a few if I managed to keep the cue ball going where I wanted. I lined up for the first shot and it went just as I'd hoped. The next one was a little tricky, but I managed to get the ball to sink, though it was close. The cue ball went a little far so I had to rethink my third shot. I was studying the table again when I felt her lean against my side.
She moved forward and whispered in my ear, "Make sure you get it deep in the hole."
My concentration disappeared.
"Thanks," I said, smirking at her. "Now it'll be oh-so-easy!"
She laughed and stepped back. I lined up for my shot and missed completely, but the bank off the bumper sent the cue ball into another ball, which rolled into the corner pocket.
"Whew," I said with a laugh. "Better to be lucky than good!"
"Oh, I hope you're good, too!" she responded.
My next shot was near to impossible and I missed it, but got close. That still opened up the table for her.
She lined up a shot and then looked up at me. "What do I get if I sink this shot?"
"What do you want?"
"I want a kiss," she purred.
"Absolutely!" I said.
.... There is more of this story ...