She'd found out. That's the only thought that kept running through Tim's mind. His wife had found out about his affair. Tim didn't know how, but she did. He could have sworn he'd been careful and not left a single clue. He'd even bought that weird potion from the internet that claimed to make anyone believe anything, but still she found out. During lunch, he'd gotten an angry phone call letting him know there was hell to be paid when he got home. Stacey knew.
Slowly walking down the back streets to the metro, Tim wracked his brain for what he could do to postpone the inevitable. All of his careful lies and deceit had been for nought. Tim stopped at a store window and looked at his reflection: he wiped his brow as he recognized that the stress of the day had taken its toll.
His hair was wet and matted down from sweat. His tie was half undone and drooped down his shirt, skewed to the left. His jacket hung loosely on his shoulders. He felt as though the slightest breeze would have knocked his briefcase out of his hand.
But Rosa, she was perfect. Tim had lusted after her curvaceous body since the day they'd met at the office. And when she offered herself to him, he was too weak to say no.
He was daft. How could he have believed that internet ad? Like there really was some potion that could make someone believe any lie. Tim scoffed.
That had sent him down his current path to ruin. Stacey had detected something the first time. She was suspicious, and he'd thought about calling it off, but after searching the darker corners of the net, he thought he'd found his answer. It was called BelieveAll. The company selling it claimed that it would get anyone to believe anything.
Tim was shocked that it had worked. Stacey believed everything; she even bought that the trip he'd taken Rosa on was actually a company junket he had to pay for personally. Tim was living the high life. But that all came crashing down with the lunchtime phone call, nearly a year after he first used the product.
Tim turned away from the store window and headed back towards the metro. Time to face the music, he thought as he heaved a deep sigh. Something in the store window made Tim take a second glance at the store. He couldn't believe it. The store was called EMC Products. That was the company that had sold him the BelieveAll potion.
This was their fault! If that snake oil had actually worked as claimed, he could still go from his lunch time snack at work to his hearty dinner at home. If Tim was going to be torn a new one, he was going to get in some yelling of his own. Burst through the door, he looked for anyone working there to yell at. Anyone at all. He didn't care how low down on the totem pole that person was.
No one was there; no customers, no clerks, no one. Tim strolled around the store and looked at all of the crazy gizmos laying about. If Tim hadn't previously done business with them, he would have thought it was strictly an "adult" store.
Tim made his way back to the register and looked at all of the various perfumes and potions that lined the glass case in front of it. He searched for BelieveAll and found it over in the far corner. Worthless junk.
"Hello?" Tim called out.
A man came out from what appeared to be the stock room and greeted Tim with a smile. "How may I help you, sir?"
"Yeah. About a year ago, I bought some of that BelieveAll crap and ... it doesn't work at all."
"Oh? Did you wait a whole year before using it after you bought it?"
"No," Tim said. "I used it throughout the year."
"And it never worked for you?"
"Well ... I mean, she believed me, but was it because I was good at lying or because of your junk?"
"I assure you, it was BelieveAll."
The clerk's cocksure manner irked Tim. "Yeah? Then how come my wife figured out I was having an affair?"
"Maybe because you were careless. BelieveAll makes them believe you. It doesn't make them stupid."
Tim jabbed the man's chest with his finger. "Maybe it's because you sold me a bottle of swill. I talked to her on the phone and she didn't believe anything I said."
The man glared at Tim's finger. "How often have you been using it on her?"
Tim paused. He'd given her a dose every time he'd hooked up with Rosa. That meant... "About every day."
"Every day?" the man looked shocked. "And she's just now not believing you? Remarkable."
"Yes, I discovered that formula during my undergrad years at MCU. Very effective, but it was somewhat lacking. It turns out that people soon build up a tolerance to it. I've never heard of it being effective for a year with a daily dosage."
"Tolerance? The website I ordered it from didn't say anything about tolerance."
"Didn't you read the manual?"
"You mean that 500-page monster that was more about the morality of using the potion? No. At least, not all the way through."
The clerk sighed and pulled out the manual. It landed with a thud on the glass countertop. Leafing through the index, he found what he was looking for and then opened it to a page about two thirds of the way through. He turned it towards Tim and said, "Please read here, sir."
"If you are scummy enough to need to use this on the same person regularly, be warned, people build up a tolerance to it and will catch you at whatever it is you are doing, you lying bastard."
The clerk slammed the book closed. "Clearly in the manual. If you had bothered to read it, you wouldn't be in this situation, now would you?"
"What the hell type of hypocrite are you? You sell stuff for people to do unethical things, but expect people to be ethical with it?"
The clerk spoke in a more soothing voice. "I mean for my products to bring joy to the people they're used on. BelieveAll was never meant to be a permanent solution but part of a means to an end. I can't condone my products to be used to cover for a long term affair as one person is getting the short end of the stick, so to speak.
"I know it sounds hypocritical, and maybe it is. But we're all part hypocrite. I just want my products to bring joy, and apparently, they've failed in your case. So, I apologize. Is there anything I can do to try to help you resolve your situation?"
That's better, Tim thought. "Well, I want to keep seeing my girl on the side, but I don't want to lose my wife either. Got anything for that?"
The clerk rubbed his chin with his thumb and index finger. He surveyed the assortment of chemicals and potions in the glass case and then looked back up at Tim. "There are several ways that we can go about this. I take it you want to be more in the open with your affair?"
"Well, I hadn't really thought about it that way. I just want it so the wife won't be pissed."
"Okay, so you want to fool around and your wife not to mind. I've got just the thing." The clerk bent down and pulled out a round container that looked like a bin of foot cream. The label on the lid called it "HornDog". He set it on the counter and spun it so the label was right-side up for Tim. "This should do the trick."
"HornDog?" Tim asked.
"Yes, it'll show your wife that men are really just horny dogs. In a sense, she'll realize that you basically just need to fuck. Once you apply this to her, she won't care if you bang five women in front of her."
"Nice. I don't want to bang five women, just the two."
The clerk winked at Tim. "Well, you'd be prepared for a rainy day in any case, if you catch my drift."
"So, how does it work? Is there another 500-page manual for this one, too?"
"Oh, no. This one is rather simple. You just need to rub it on her vagina."
Tim slammed the counter top with his fists, making the clerk jump back. "Are you insane? My wife knows. She's not going to let me anywhere near her crotch. This shit is worthless!"
"Hmm ... that's a problem. But," the clerk disappeared below the counter again and stood up with a spray bottle, "I think this is just the thing to solve that problem."
Tim took the bottle the clerk handed him. "BottledBlonde," he read aloud. "Have you ever heard of spaces?"
The clerk ignored Tim's snide comment and took the bottle back. "Just one spray to the face and your wife will be momentarily stunned, so to speak. You should have enough time to do whatever you need to do in order to access her private area."
Tim found it incredible that there really could be such a simple solution to his problem. But, despite his protests to the contrary, the BelieveAll potion had been rather effective. Maybe it was possible. It was better than nothing.
"OK, I'll take it." Tim handed his credit card over and signed the receipt. Once the transaction was complete, he strode quickly out the door.
Thirty minutes later, Tim inserted the key into the lock on the front door of his house. Before he had even gotten all the way inside, his wife was on him.
"You cheating sack of shit!" she screamed as she started flailing at him with her fists. Tim covered his head with his hands as she beat at him. "How long have you been fucking that slut?"
Backing into the corner, Tim continued to protect his head with one hand, while he fumbled in his bag with his over. At last he found what he was looking for and brought the bottle of BottledBlonde up and shot his wife with it.
As suddenly as she had fallen upon him, she stopped. Stacey stood motionless; her arms hung at her sides. Tim watched in amazement as her black hair turned blonde. The blond came springing from her scalp and went cascading down the length of her hair.
.... There is more of this story ...