Chapter 4

It was well after ten and I was slumped in my Jacuzzi, drinking red wine and brooding over the collapse of my nefarious plans when a ghostly figure emerged from the mists -- Jean in a white terrycloth robe and flip-flops. "You got a gun under there?" I asked.

"No." She hesitated. "I came to bury the hatchet."

"So you have an axe..." I accused.

"No, I came to apologize. Since my husband, I'm not too trusting when it comes to men."

"Well, don't start with me, Honey," I told her. "I'm an even worse pervert than you think I am. The only thing you can count on me to do is follow my dick."

Jean smiled crookedly. "At least you're up-front about it."

"Honey, if you think that's any indication I'm not serious about getting into your panties, you've got another think coming!" I rasped. "There, I said it -- you're still standing there?"

Jean continued to smile. "I'm told your bark is worse than your bite."

I leered at her, "That's EXACTLY what I WANT you to think!" I waved my glass. "Want some? It's a merlot."

"Okay."

"I'll get you a glass." I deliberately stood and exited the Jacuzzi without collecting a towel.

She one-upped me -- when I got back with the glass, she was in the Jacuzzi. "Are you legal?" I demanded crossly. She arched her back and nipples peeked above the froth. "Bottoms?" She shook her head. "I'm gonna check," I warned.

"Okay."

I stepped over the rim and settled into my seat, then deliberately stuck my foot out and put my toes in her crotch. There was fur there. "After all this, you just climb into my Jacuzzi naked? Why couldn't we have done this days ago? If you don't like the pool..."

"Don't tease me. I SAID I was sorry."

"Well, no, you didn't," I pointed out, pouring. "You said you came to bury the hatchet, then you said you came to apologize -- but you haven't actually apologized." I handed her the glass.

"You're a mean bastard, aren't you?" she asked.

"Yup. Vicious. And stupid -- don't forget that. I lend women cars at the drop of a hat -- and pay for repairs, too. All to sniff the crotch of some woman's panties."

"Gawd! You're incorrigible!"

"At least. Drink your wine, so you have an excuse in the morning."

"I'm not here for that."

"Well I am!" I sighed. "Okay, get on with whatever it is, then, so I can go somewhere and jerk off picturing your nipples poking above the water."

She looked away, embarrassed. "Cletus, I..."

"First names! Perfect!" I wrung my hands.

"Stop that!"

"Oh, all right." I settled back.

"I apologize -- I really do."

"Apology accepted," I replied. "Now I'm gonna warn you -- run! Take the kids and hide -- none of you are safe! I'm even worse than you think I am! Go, and never come back -- or you'll wish you had!" I cocked my head. "Am I getting through?"

She smiled over the rim of the glass. "Oh, you're a terror all right."

I rolled my eyes. "Yeesh! There's no help for you. Ever hear the old adage that you should go with your first impression? What was your first impression of me? Think about it -- you were probably LESS than right..."

She ignored me. "I can't pay you back -- at least, not all at once."

"Great -- you owe me. All is lost. Remember tonight when I've pressed your knees to your shoulders..."

"I'm being serious!"

"The difference between us, Hon, is that you don't recognize the fact that I am, too!" I told her. "I know things are tight -- it's irrelevant. You should walk; I'll call it a bad debt. If you don't, sooner or later your pussy lips are gonna hug my erection."

She giggled, shaking her head. "Cletus, I'm not going to do anything of the sort. I don't do anything like that -- and you can't make me."

"I won't try," I told her. "You'll want it -- I don't force my women. I guess I should ask, though -- do you like girls? Despite evidence to the contrary? I have a contingency plan for that, too..."

"You're a piece of work -- you know that?"

"I've heard rumors -- you didn't answer my question."

"I'm not into anything or anybody right now," she replied. "Least of all you. This has been fun, but I have to work tomorrow." She tossed back the wine and put the glass down.

"Wait!" I erupted, then settled back in my seat. "Ready."

"For what?"

"To howl and wolf-whistle and molest you with my eyeballs and tickle your nipples with the forked tongue I lied about not having to Heather earlier."

She slumped, shaking her head. "Heather. What am I going to do with her?"

"Nothing," I replied. "In every young person's life, there comes a day when they win an argument with their parents. It's a rite of passage into adulthood. I bet you remember yours." Looking into her eyes, I KNEW she did.

"I guess you're right." She made to get up. "You're going to ogle me, aren't you?"

"Yes, Ma'am," I replied, proud of myself. "What kind of noises do you make during sex? I want to get it right in my fantasies." She rolled her eyes and stood. "Okay, I'll stand for the lady..." I announced, and got up.

She looked down at my cock. "It's a good deal more impressive than it was before."

"With good reason!" I replied admiring her.

"You're a horror." She got out of the tub and put on her robe. "Good night."

"Want to get the profile?" I asked, turning, "for later?"

She looked back, smiling crookedly. "You are something!"

"Lie to me -- tell me you won't masturbate, later," I challenged. "I will."

"Good night..." She waved languidly as she picked her way back to her back door.

"Good night." I chuckled to myself and sat back down in the bubbling froth. I'd pretty much anaesthetized her. Next time she would giggle at my noises, but do nothing -- until it was too late...

Apparently, she and Heather buried the hatchet, too, because she took Heather to work the next morning -- which left Michael a latchkey kid -- and put him at my back slider around ten. I was sitting on the couch in the TV room, watching porn and trying to get a little relief, and had to bolt up and kill the TV then go let him in. Given the fact that I'd been doing pretty well, there was no hiding the boner. Michael eyed the tent in my towel, "Damn!"

"Yeah, well..."

"You weren't playing those movies again, were you?"

"What's it to you?" Robbed of a nut, I was a little grumpy.

"Nothing -- except I'd sure like to see one!" Michael replied, looking hopeful.

That put a different spin on things. My brain kicked into gear and I started looking at improvements over Rosy and her sisters for a playmate. "Oh. Your mama would pee her panties, you know..."

"Yeah, well, you don't seem to be on the shit list today..." Michael grinned, waiting to see if I would call him down for profanity.

I didn't. "So I should try harder?" I grinned.

"Maybe." Michael eyed me. "I notice you're not asking whether I should be here or not."

"Your mama came over to apologize late last night," I replied. "I'm assuming you're good to go."

"I am," he agreed. "What about the movie?"

"Come on..." I led him back to the TV room, turned the video back on, plopped on the couch and opened my towel kilt. Michael's eyes bugged. "What?" I rasped. "If you're gonna jerk off to porn, you have to get it out, right?"

"Uh, right!" He slid out of his trunks. I started thinking about how his ass wouldn't be any different than his sister's...

"Kleenexes are over there," I pointed to a box on the end table, then started choking my snake. His was up and rock hard; he started handling it while dividing his attention between watching the porn flick and watching me. I did various things, changing speeds and styles, and he tried to emulate me as best he could -- and he got a nut pretty quickly. "Good, eh?" I chuckled as he grunted his way through it, dumping his load in a tissue. "It's messier if you let fly and then clean up, but it feels better."

"Uhng." Michael nodded.

"There's only one thing better than getting yourself off," I ventured.

"What's that?"

"Getting help with it." I reached over and wrapped my fingers around his hot, hard rod. Michael looked at me, aghast, but didn't make any move to remove my hand. "Come on," I chided, "Don't tell me you don't want to see how mine feels..." He reached over tentatively and wrapped his fingers around my snake while I gently pumped his. "Feels great, doesn't it? There's just something more exciting about it..."

"Yeah..." Michael gasped, then looked up at me owlishly. "You're not gay, are you?"

I laughed. "You've seen me look at your sister, and you ask me that? I'm bisexual, Son -- which means I take my pleasure where I can get it. You stick to one sex, you miss half of your opportunities to get a nut!"

"Oh." Michael blinked. "I thought it was one way or the other."

"Nah," I replied. "It's a continuum -- a spread. Some people are more on the left and some are more on the right -- and some run closer to the middle than others. Probably everybody is a little interested in sampling the other side, if they would only admit it. Gays probably get an occasional hankering for straight sex, and most straights at least have fantasies of trying out gay -- but it's not something you admit to people, because we're all hung up that way and living in the Dark Ages still. Me, I'm a little to the right of center -- I can only get really romantic and mushy with girls, but getting off by doing a little guy sex is good, clean fun." I waved one hand in explanations while the other kept Michaels cock happy.

"Uh huh," he grunted, his eyes glazed. I grinned to myself; I'd be getting lip service soon, at a minimum.

"If you were a total homophobe, you'd have shit a brick already and I'd be sitting here by myself," I pointed out. "But you aren't, so we might as well enjoy ourselves."

"Yeah, okay." I watched him set mental limits, knowing he wasn't going to keep them.

Then the damned phone rang.

It was Karen Moffat. "I hate to bother you, but I called Jean's ... I got called in to work -- there was a fire at a client and they need a quick cleanup. It's overtime, and I can use it, but I'd have to leave Petey..." I felt sorry for Peter; just having the name was bad enough, but having his mother call him that to strangers... "I hoped to leave him with Heather and Michael..."

"Heather is working," I told her, "but coincidentally, Michael is here. Where is Kate?"

"She went to Girl Scout Camp and won't be home until tomorrow," Karen related.

"So you want me to babysit Peter..."

"I'd be so very grateful!" Karen gushed -- which was probably the right thing for her to say. "But please, don't present it like that to Petey."

"I wouldn't think of it," I replied. "It wouldn't be manly."

Karen sighed. "Some exposure to 'manly' might do the poor dear some good..."

"I have no doubt," I said dryly. "Drag him over -- he can hang out with Michael and me." 'Literally, ' I added to myself.

"What's up?" Michael asked as I hung up.

"Peter's coming over."

"Oh." Michael's face looked like mine had initially.

"Cheer up!" I advised. "If you're even CLOSE to right about Peter, we'll be able to roll him right into the mix! He wanted to see the videos the other day, didn't he?"

"Yeah..." Michael began to smile.

"Okay, then. We'll watch a little more to stay warmed up until Peter arrives, then run off his old lady and take up where we left off!"

"Kewl!"

Peter fit right in. Michael whispered something in his ear while I was busy putting up with Karen's effusive thanks and he lit up like a Christmas tree and yelled, "Bye, Mom!" They were on the couch when I got back to the TV room, waiting. I fired up the video and sat down to Peter's left, sandwiching him between Michael and I, and did what I'd done earlier -- uncover my meat. Peter's eyes bulged, but Michael shucked back out of his swim trunks on his right, so he didn't know WHAT to do! "Uuhh..."

"What are you gonna do -- sit there with a hard on in your shorts and not do anything about it?" I chided. "That'd be mighty uncomfortable..." I started skinning and grinning and Michael started too -- and Peter got out of his clothes in record time.

After that, it was easy. Peter wasn't huge -- decent, but not anything special, and kind of narrow. We got going, and the first time I reached over and ran a finger along the underside of his shaft, he arched himself and made like a fountain, splashing cum all over. Michael laughed -- Peter had to wipe the mess off of his eyeglasses, among other places. "Y--you touched me!" Peter panted.

"I won't if you don't want me to," I replied, "but the only thing better than getting yourself off is getting help, you know?" Michael grinned and nodded and Peter relaxed.

"I was just ... worried..." he muttered.

"Ain't nobody here but us," I told him. "I sure don't plan to incriminate ME by pointing fingers at YOU! Enjoy yourself!" Ninety seconds later, Peter was wanking Michael and I both.

The video ended and I got up to replace the DVD, feeding it a bisexual flick to see what would happen. Then I said, "Anybody want some tea?" I got the nod from both of them and went in to get ice and glasses.

When I got back, Michael was grinning from ear to ear -- and Pete was licking his cock like it was a popsicle. I put the drink tray down on the coffee table and went over to stand to Michael's right and stick my meat in his face. "It isn't fair to Peter if you don't hold up your end -- can't have you talking about him like a dog." Michael looked momentarily reluctant, then rolled his lips over my meat and I started to really enjoy the day.

It only took two or three minutes for me to unload on Michael's tonsils -- he did a pretty good job. By then, Peter was lying in Michael's lap, occasionally licking his shaft and looking satisfied with his morning. "I think I'm gay," he announced.

"Well, I'm not, and Michael doesn't think he is," I pointed out. "You can have fun both ways without committing fully to one or another, like they do," I waved at the video. "Try out a girl before you make up your mind -- the worst that will happen is that you'll know for sure." I eyed him. "Mama keeps you pretty much under the thumb, doesn't she?"

"Yeah."

"That can skew your outlook. Stick with us -- we'll get you laid, one way or another. Then you can make up your mind." I cocked my head. "Ever think it might be fun to watch your mama take a dick?"

"Uuh..." Peter flicked a glance at Michael, who shrugged.

"That'd bring her down a peg or two, wouldn't it?" I pointed out.