Damn, how did it come to this? This man, I don't know anymore. Well that's not quite right, this man who I know too much about. Everything I know. No mystery, no secrets. He's shared everything with me and now? Well know I can relate to his first wife on why she dumped his ass.
At the time, many years ago, I thought she was crazy. Insane for dumping this virile man. He had everything. Looks. A good job. A gentle touch. She was an idiot. But hey, I profited from her discards. I snatched him up and made him feel loved again. Love him I did. He loved me and soon we married and his first wife was but a memory.
The years passed. Our cycles and rhythms merged. I knew him. He knew me. We got comfortable. The conversations dwindled down to nothing. Now here I am: staring at this man across the table from me. We have no more words to say to each other. We haven't in months. I've grown bored of him. Some other man could intrigued me. This other man would have secrets. He could be a mystery. I would like to solve him.
Has it come to this? Has my husband been a complex jigsaw puzzle? To be solved and then discarded as I search out another challenge? Am I as bad as his first wife? Is it me? Or is it him? How dare he use up these years of mine! Some of my best years, devoted to this shell of a man. Mystery solved. Puzzle completed. Secrets told. I have consumed him and found the meal ... lacking. Why again did I think he was a catch? Why did I think his ex was an idiot for dumping him? Look! There he goes, taking another slice of toast! The pig! Say something! SAY SOMETHING! ANYTHING!
He grunts. That's all he does now. Did he do that before? His jokes, they're always the same, and old! Sheesh! They were old groaners before I was even born. Did I really find them funny before? Just look at the way he drinks his juice. Such a slob! Now he's putting his dishes in the sink and then he washes them, just like every damn day. Oh god! Now he's coming over to kiss me. Ugh! He just has to slobber on me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you love me. How pathetic. Why are you so needy? His ass has gotten bigger. I'm sure he'll ask me to buy him bigger pants after payday. That's it, leave! Go to work! Bring home the money so we can pay the bills! Now I can have the house to myself.
God I'm bored. What's to do? Marcy is travelling with Fred. The house is clean; leave it to him to be such a clean freak! Even that annoys me. Sigh. Only three more months before we can go on vacation again. I swear three times a year is so lame. This time it was his choice and he wanted to go to Thailand. I hate Thai food. This is going to suck. He can be so cheesy playing the tourist, asking all those questions. Why can't we just stay at the resort, shop and sunbathe? No he always has to go out and experience new things. It's always the same. Then he gets all randy and wants to make love. I mean come on. We've been together for seven years! It's just sex now. He makes such a big production out of it, getting room service to make up the rooms, flower petals sticking to my ass afterwards. What ever happened to just getting it over with so that I don't have to deal with him for long. We go on these trips and it's like we're together all the time until I can't stand it!
I might as well check email. Maybe something interesting will have happened to one of my friends. Damn I'm bored. Did he say he wouldn't be home until late tonight? Some damn class he wanted us to take? No that's tomorrow. Well I'm tired of that crap. What's this? He didn't log off his email account? Anything interesting? What's this? I never thought his ex-wife kept his last name. She's sent him a lot of emails. Hmmmm, opening.
Blah, blah, blah, Jason, I miss you, blah, blah, blah, never knew I had it so good. Hmmm, what a loser. Maybe she was the one with the problem! The two of them would be good for each other, both boring and losers. Let's open another one. Hmmm. Well at least he has the good taste to tell her that she had her chance, though if I were him, I wouldn't be too quick to dismiss her, you never know when a back up plan may be in order.
Ha! Look at her! Crawling and begging back to him. Oh poor her, all the other men treated her like shit! Nice big hard cocks weren't enough for you sweetie? Those manly muscles didn't do it for you? Oh I see, maybe too much of a challenge for you. Oh this is just sad. She dumps him for a better life and falls into a worse life!
Blah, blah, blah, if only she knew what she had before she tossed it away ... Yep, I guess you did screw up that, didn't you. Look she's even going into details! How pathetic! She's actually asking him for advice! Oh I see your plan bitch! A veiled attempt at getting him to feel sorry for you by supposedly asking him for advice, then tell him how bad things are.
Wait, what's that? Jackson Palley? I know him! He's that man candy we met at the gallery opening last year. Oh he was so hot! His long blonde hair. Such a brooding artist. His hands were so large and strong. Oh yeah, I remember thinking about him for a month afterwards when Jason made love to me. Such firm hands, such dark eyes! Yummy! So what's all this that he was shallow and lousy in bed? Jackson Palley has a small cock? He's selfish? But he's so hot! How can that looser ex of his bed Jackson? She tired of him after only three weeks. Well I guess maybe all those looks could hide a dud. Jackson a dud, hmmm, oh well. Look she goes on to tell Jason on how one hit her. I would think the bitch brought that on herself! Oh, I'm bad! I guess it's never right to hit a girl. Jason would never do that. He wouldn't dare, if he knew what was good for him. The poor pathetic sod can't go a day without pawing me and kissing me and telling me how much he loves me. If he did hit me he would be so cut off and that would hurt him far much more than he could ever hurt me! Oh well, let's check my email and see what's happening!
Damn that didn't take long. Why is it that Jason gets so much more email than me? Yeah so he knows more people, but they don't know him like me, I mean he is so plain and boring! I just wish I could talk to my friends about Jason. Every time I start to complain they get that wistful look in their eyes. I know that look. I had that a long time ago when Jason's ex complained to me about him. They just all think I'm a fool and they must be scheming to take him if I ever dump his ass. If only they knew what I knew, they wouldn't feel the same way. Hell, maybe I was the fool when I thought those things back just before Jason's ex dumped him. He sure had me fooled.
Hmmm. Why didn't Jason mention that his ex was emailing him? That would have been some interesting conversation at dinner we could have laughed about. Instead he just talks about his boring day and his classes he's taking. I wonder why he never even mentioned it. He normally tells me everything...
I never noticed the photo albums missing. Jason likes things orderly, so why are his old ones out from the book shelf? Oh there they are, on his desk. Hmmm. Those are from his first marriage. I guess he's was looking back through them since his ex emailed him. I'll put them back in the bookshelf. Wow. Our photo albums are dusty! It's like they haven't been looked at for years! Oh look! There's when we went to Cairo! I just have to see the picture of Jason and I on that camel! That thing was stinky! I swear I reeked of camel sweat for two days afterwards. It didn't turn off Jason one bit though! He even made love to me in the bath while we soaked the stink away. That was nice.
All these memories, and all those trips. He sure likes to travel. I guess after the long flights in the cramped seats the places are decent. He's much bigger than I so he was even more cramped on those flights, yet he never complained. Why hasn't he mentioned his ex-wife emailing him to me?
Oh crap! It's almost dinner time! I better throw something together. How did it get so late? What's with all the photo albums being taken down? Did I really go through all of them? I better put these away and get dinner on.
Something's different about him. Oh sure, he just sits there and eats my dinner. It was thrown together yet he still likes it. Is it his posture? Did he get a hair cut? Oh my day was fine dear. Yeah and what's up with your ex-wife emailing you? Oh you don't know about me knowing? Yeah I'm sure you would play the innocent about it. Yeah what I know about you buster, you have no idea. But unlike you I keep my mouth shut. You just sit there and eat your dinner, pretend I don't know. That bitch is trying to sink her fake-ass nail claws back into you. She has a nerve. What are you hiding from me Jason? Something is different about him.