Chapter 7

Mae and I lay in the guest-room bed and were engaging in some after-play with one of her breasts. “So,” she asked. “Did our little plan work?”

I shook my head. “No. Dad was still convinced you’re trans-gendered -- so I told him the whole story.”

Her jaw dropped and she pulled away from me. “You TOLD him? How could you? How COULD you?”

“I could never get away with lying to my dad -- he has a sixth sense. He’s okay with it, Mae. He understands and he’ll protect our secret.”

“I wish I could be so sure.”

“He doesn’t have a prurient interest in you -- he was looking out for my welfare.”

“Your welfare?”

“Yeah -- he was worried that I didn’t know.”

Mae regarded me and giggled. She put her hand over her mouth and laughed. “Your dad thought his innocent little boy had been fooled by some ... tranny?”

“That’s what he feared. Does that make it okay?”

“No -- but it makes it understandable.”

“My dad might be a little coarse -- but he’s a man of integrity and a man who knows what’s the right thing to do.”

She stroked my cheek and nodded. “Like his son does. So that’s where you get it.”

“I told him the whole story -- about your surgery and what we went through. He respects you more for it, Mae. He respects both of us. He won’t breathe a word to anyone -- especially not to Karen.”

She cuddled against me again. “I have to know -- what gave me away? Was it my hips? My shoulders?”

“It was your hands. She has a man’s hands, he said.”

“I knew it! My too-big hands.”

“No. The shape of them. Your hands are like mine -- Your ring fingers are longer than your index fingers.”

Mae examined her hand. “Len -- that’s the old 2D-4D fallacy. It’s an urban myth.”

“Urban myth? Dad said it’s an example of sexual dimorphism.”

“I took a course in human sexual dimorphism in college,” Mae replied. “There are real examples but this isn’t one of them. The variation in both men and women is too great to be a reliable indicator. Besides, recent research shows it more to do with fetal testosterone exposure in the womb than genetics.”

“So, Dad just got lucky.”

“If he’s using finger lengths to identify T-G people, he’s apt to be wrong more often than right.”

“Or, it was something else,” I replied. “He knows you’re Thai and he knows the culture there. Maybe there’s something about you he picked up on that I missed. Maybe he punk’d me, made it fall on me to deny it. Like I said, he has a sixth sense and I could never lie to him. He is a man of his word, Mae. If he says he’ll keep a secret, it will go to the grave with him.”

I lay on my back and Mae snuggled against me. “I still think at some point we will need to tell Karen,” I said as I stroked her back. “I won’t force the issue. I’ll let you decide the proper time.”

“Why is it so important to you that she know?”

“I want you in my life for the long haul, Mae, and I want to be in yours. That means Dad and Karen will be in our lives for the long haul. If she should, somehow, discover this about you, I think she might feel deceived and that wouldn’t be good for our relationship. I do think it’s okay to give my folks time to get to know you.”

“I ... I guess I can accept that.”

“I mean, after we’re engaged...” I bit my tongue. Shit! I thought. I let it slip.

“Engaged?” Mae lifted up. “Len -- were you going to ask me to marry you?”

“I was ... I will, but the ring hasn’t arrived.”

‘You bought a ring?”

“It’s on order. I was going to take you to a nice restaurant and ask you there.”

She lay on her back. “Holy...” She put her hand on her chest. “I’m having palpitations.”

“So, will you?”

“It just became crystal clear to me,” she said. “Len ... I can’t ... unless I know your folks will accept me.”

“My dad accepts you. He thinks you’re a lovely person.”

“Your dad is a man of the world. You said Karen grew up in a fundamentalist congregation. I know of the awful things they teach about the LGBT community. You’re right. We need to tell her.” Mae got up from the bed and turned on the light. She pulled on her robe and then took her pendant from her bag and put it in her pocket. “We need to tell her, now.”

“But, they’re in bed,” I said as I pulled on my robe. Together we headed down the hall to the master bedroom. I put my ear to the door. “The television is on -- they’re still up.” I knocked on the door. “Dad? Karen?”

The door cracked open. “What is it?” my dad asked.

“Mae and I need to talk to you and Karen.”

The door closed and opened again. “All right. We’ll meet you in the living room.”

We headed downstairs and stood, holding each other. “I am more scared of this than anything,” she said.

“Karen is a good person. I think she’ll be fine with you.”

My dad appeared in a robe and sat on the sofa. Karen sat beside him in a long flannel gown. “What is it you need to talk to us about?” she asked.

“Len just asked me to marry him,” Mae said.

“That’s wonderful,” Karen replied. “Did you say yes?”

Mae shook her head. “No, I didn’t.”

“She didn’t say no, either,” I added.

“Before I say yes,” Mae continued, “I need to know if you’ll accept me into your family.”

“Of course we accept you,” Karen replied. “Why wouldn’t we?”

“Mae has something to tell you about herself,” I said. “Dad knows already.” I saw my father grab Karen’s hand and hold it.

“Karen,” Mae said, “I’m trans-gender. I was born a boy in Thailand but I always knew my body and my soul didn’t fit. I began reassignment therapy in Thailand and continued it, here.”

“She just completed it,” I added. “She had the surgery about eight months ago.”

Karen stared at Mae, her jaw dropped. “Oh, my God.” She buried her face in her hands. “Oh, my God, what have I done?”

Mae gave me an anguished look, her eyes brimming. Then Karen stood and embraced her. “I’m trying to formulate words. Of course I accept you, Mae. This doesn’t change my feelings for you. You’re the first trans-gendered person I’ve known.”

“Probably not,” I replied. “They don’t wear badges, you know.”

“Sit beside me, dear.” Mae sat beside her on the sofa. Karen put her arm around her shoulders. “I have amends to make and maybe you can help me know how. You see -- you just turned my world upside-down. Len’s dad likes to say I’m a recovering fundie. And, he’s right. You’ve heard of being born again.”

“Yes,” Mae replied.

“Well, I was un-born again. I had my own revelation ... that what we were taught, what was preached ... was wrong. But, what they instilled in me doesn’t go away easily. We were taught that it’s impossible to change your sex. We were taught that there was no such thing as a trans woman, but merely men wearing dresses. You, Mae, put the lie to that claim. You are as pretty, as feminine and as sweet as any girl Len has had us meet.”

“Thank you,” Mae replied. “Transitioning is something I had to do. Living as a male would have been unbearable. We can’t change our genes, but we can change our bodies. The surgery was the most difficult thing I have endured, and I would not have survived it if it weren’t for Len. He was with me throughout my recovery and he gave me the strength to endure it. Now, finally, I’m living the life I have always wanted. It won’t be easy. I’ll need to take estrogen for the rest of my life. I wear an appliance each day to keep my vagina from collapsing. I’ll never bear a child.” Mae glanced at my father. “For the record: In Thailand, trans women don’t refer to ourselves as kathoey. That word has a different meaning. What we use is phu ying praphet song, which means second class of female. That’s what I am, Karen. I’m a second-class woman, but I AM a woman.”

“You are first-class in my eyes,” I interjected.

“And, in ours,” Karen replied and embraced Mae again. “You poor thing. Believe me, Mae. I would be honored and delighted to have you as my daughter-in-law.”

“Step-daughter-in-law,” I remarked.

“Whatever-in-law. Mae you are more than welcome in our family.”

“I’m happy,” Mae replied. “I’m very happy.”

“You mentioned amends,” I said.

“I am so ashamed,” Karen replied. “We learned that there’s a trans girl enrolled in Mikey’s school. A group of moms is petitioning the school. They don’t want to deny anyone an education, but they don’t want ... this child ... her ... there. One of them came to me and asked me to sign the petition ... and I did, without really thinking about it. Now I know how wrong this is. We could be harming someone just like you.”

“I was about Mikey’s age when I started the reassignment therapy -- maybe a couple years younger. It’s a difficult time for a child. Inclusion and acceptance are crucial.”

:”How did you deal with it at that age?” Karen asked.

“How most of us do -- by staying in the closet.”

“I’m going to call the mom who started that petition and tell her I can no longer support it. What else can I do?”

“I’m sure there’s a Pride or LGBT support group you can contact. The parents need to be educated. We’re not monsters. We’re not perverts preying on little girls. All we want is to live normal, happy lives in the skin that matches our souls -- just like you.”

“Thank you, Mae,” Karen added, “for opening my eyes.”

“Thank you for opening mine,” Mae replied. “Now I know how important it is for me to come out of the closet.” She reached into her robe pocket, withdrew the pendant I had given her and slipped the chain around her neck.

Karen examined it. “It’s lovely.”

“Len had it made for me.”

“So,” my dad said, “what’s your answer?”

“My answer?” Mae replied.

“To Len’s question.”

She stood and approached at me. “Yes. Yes, Len -- I will marry you.”

I held her and she started sobbing. “More tears of joy?”

“Yes ... and of sorrow. I wish my parents were here. They would be so happy for me.”

I held her until she calmed. Holding hands we faced my folks. “We’ll make it official once the ring arrives, and then we’ll set a date.”

“Will you want a traditional Thai wedding?” Karen asked.

“No,” Mae replied. “I want an American one ... but a small one. I have no family ... until now. My parents are gone and all I have are my friends at the Asian grocery and the girls at Mama’s boarding house.”

“Plenty of time to plan for that,” I added. “Now, we need to get an early start tomorrow.”

My dad extended his hand and I shook it. Then, he hugged me. “Well done,” he said, “I’m proud of you, son.”

“Be proud of Mae. She’s the one with balls.” He hugged Mae and I hugged Karen. “Well, we better get some rest,” I said. Holding hands Mae and I headed upstairs to the guest room.