Once upon a time I loved my wife and I thought she loved me. I thought we had a good marriage, but time changes all things and our relationship was no exception.
I met Gina by accident - literally - when she ran into the back of my car while I was sitting at a stoplight. It wasn't her fault; she was rear ended and pushed into me. When we got out of our cars to check out the damage I paid more interest to her than I did the damage to my car. Visually speaking, she was my ideal woman. Tall at five-nine, long hair down to the middle of her back, she looked great without any makeup on and she had legs that seemed to go on forever. It didn't hurt that she was showing off those legs by wearing four-inch heels.
While we were waiting for the cops to come and take the accident report we exchanged names, phone numbers and insurance information and while doing that I checked out her left hand and saw no rings. I decided that I had nothing to lose in going for it so I did and to my great joy she said yes when I asked her to have dinner with me. By the fifth date we were making out like teenagers and by the tenth she was giving me hand jobs while I finger fucked her. I tried to take it to the next level and she shot me down.
"Not until Rob, not until."
"Not until what?"
"Until I decide."
Well fuck this shit I thought and I put an end to the finger fucking, breast play and I kept my dick in my pants and when she reached for it I pushed her hand away.
"What's wrong?" she wanted to know.
"You want to wait, we will wait, but I'm not going to spend anymore nights going home all worked up."
I still kept asking her out and she still kept saying yes and then one night while sitting on the couch in her apartment I went and did it - I asked Gina to marry me.
"I'll give you an answer tomorrow," she said.
"Because I need to see if we are a good enough fit for each other."
"How are you going to do that?"
"Come on" she said, "I'll show you" and she took my hand and pulled me up off the couch and led me into her bedroom. When she was done with me I was too wiped out to even sit up. She smiled at me and said:
"You'll do. Yes, I'll marry you."
When we said "I do" I was looking forward to a sex life and a half and for the first three years I had it. We started out our married life as a couple of sex fiends who could not leave each other alone, but somewhere along the way the fire, at least on Gina's part, went out. My fire stayed lit, my desires were still there, but for all practical purposes I was alone in our queen-size bed. It didn't matter what I did or what I tried I was the recipient of less and less sex with each passing month. More and more nights were spent in bed with Gina lying next to me, but with her back turned to me. Any attempt I made at intimacy was met with " Not tonight Rob, I don't feel like it" or the old standby, "Not tonight Rob, I have a headache."
Other than the sexual all other aspects of our relationship seemed fine, but a sexless marriage is no marriage at all unless both partners are on the same page and that was definitely not the case with Gina and me. Lack of sex was turning me bitter and I seriously began thinking of divorce, so serious that I brought it up one night at the dinner table. I wasn't at all subtle about it either.
"If you were making a list of what items you wanted to keep in a divorce what would be at the top of your list?"
"What kind of question is that?"
"Just looking ahead."
"Looking ahead at what?"
"A divorce? Why are you thinking of a divorce? Why in God's name are you thinking of something like that?"
"It is the usual way of getting out of a marriage that isn't working."
"That's nonsense! There isn't anything wrong with our marriage."
"Maybe not from where you are sitting looking at it, but the view from where I am sitting is that we are about to crater."
"What is that you see that I'm not seeing?"
"An absence of sex."
"Yes Gina, that. It is a basic human need as far as I'm concerned and since I have no intention of becoming a monk or an eunuch and I refuse to cheat a divorce that will free me to go looking for the sex I want and need seems to be the only option."
"You would throw away everything we have over a stupid little thing like sex?"
"It isn't a little thing to me Gina. Maybe if you hadn't been such a nympho when we first got married I wouldn't miss it so much, but miss it I do and I'm not going to go through the rest of my life without. I don't know what suddenly turned you off, but nothing has turned me off."
"Well I'm sorry Rob, but I just don't have any interest in sex anymore."
"Your choice Gina" I said as I got up and left the table.
I had hoped that the talk at the kitchen table would serve as a wake up call to Gina, but nothing changed in the following weeks as I made attempts to get something started only to be rebuffed. A month later I made one more try and I asked her to see a doctor and find out if there was a medical reason for her sudden lost interest in sex.
"Good God Rob, is that all you think of anymore? You are behaving like a little kid. Grow up Rob, get a grip."
A couple more months went by and I don't know how much longer it would have gone on, but everything came apart at a cocktail party at Gina's boss's house. It was held to celebrate something that I've forgotten, but I was like a command performance for Gina - she had to be there and it was expected that she have her significant other with her. I didn't really want to go, but not because I thought it would be boring, but because I knew it would cause me to smolder and there would be no way to put the fire out.
I had attended two of Gina's company Christmas parties and one company picnic and at all three I saw more sexy women than the law should allow. It must have been in the company policy and procedures manual that you couldn't work for Herb unless as a women you were a fox or as a man you were married to one. And you put that many beautiful women together in one place and they purposely try and outdo each other as far as drawing attention is concerned. I left all three with a raging hard on. I was lucky after the first one because Gina was still making love to me, but the next two came after she decided to become celibate and I suffered.
The party was just as I feared. There were gorgeous, sexy women almost wall to wall. Gina and I circulated and socialized for about an hour and then I got involved with a group discussing the upcoming Bronco's/Browns game and Gina wandered away to find a group talking about something more to her liking. It was maybe twenty minutes before I left the group and went looking for Gina. Someone said they saw her heading for the restroom. I needed to go so I headed that way. No one was in the bathroom so I went in, took care of business and when I came out I thought I heard, "Oh come on Gina" from the room across the hall. I opened the door and there stood my wife in the arms of another man and they were kissing.
"I guess he can see to it that you get home," I said as Gina turned and saw me just before I turned and walked away.
I went straight through the house and out the front door, got in my car and took off. On the way home I was making a mental list of what I needed to do to get the divorce going, but by the time I got home I was steaming and muttering to myself:
"Fuck a bunch of divorces. Why waste the fucking money."
I went down in the basement and grabbed some suitcases and started packing. I had almost all my clothes, guns and fishing gear loaded in the car when a cab pulled up in front and Gina got out. I headed upstairs to get the last bag out of the bedroom and Gina came into the room just as I closed it and set it on the floor.
"What are you doing Rob?"
"What I should have done a year ago. Getting the fuck out!"
"Just sit down Rob; calm down and let me explain. It is just a big misunderstanding."
"What's not to understand? I get no sex at home because my wife says she just isn't interested in sex anymore. Yeah, right. Just not interested in sex with me, just the assholes you work with. No wonder I never could get any; you were too fucking busy giving it to everybody else."
"Honestly Rob, you are ac..." and when she said "Honestly Rob" I lost it. I grabbed her, threw her on the bed on her stomach and then put a knee in her back to hold her down while I ripped her panties off her and threw them on the floor. I unzipped myself, pulled her up on her knees and drove my cock into her as she yelled, "Damn it Rob, let me go."
"I'll let you go when I'm good and ready you worthless cunt! This is something else I should have done long ago. To hell with the begging, whining and pleading and trying to get what you were giving away to others. I should have just taken it."
"Damn it Rob, stop right now. You don't und ... OOOF," she yelled as I gripped her hips and slammed my cock into her.
"Rob, please, ' she moaned, "You need to..."
"All I need to do you unfaithful whore, is finish and then walk away from your sorry ass."
I held her hips firmly and pounded my cock into her cunt. Unfortunately, since I hadn't been laid in forever I wasn't going to last long enough to punish the bitch the way I really wanted to. She was dry and I had to be causing her a lot of discomfort and maybe even some pain, but then that is what I wanted to do.
"Please Rob, please" she moaned and I ignored her.
"Unhappy with me Gina? Not to worry. When I finish I'm out of here and you will be free to drag all your fucking asshole lovers home with you all you want."
"No Rob, please, you don't understand. Please let me exp..."
I slammed myself into hard and held myself tight against her as my cock sent my cum boiling into her. I pushed her away from me and she fell forward on the bed. I put my cock away picked up the last bag and headed for the door. I was almost to the front door when she came out of the bedroom:
"Wait Rob, don't leave, talk to me, please Rob, please talk to me."
I kept walking and I was already in the car when she came out on the front porch. She was running toward me across the yard as I backed down the drive into to street and drove away.
I drove to the closest motel and checked in for the night. In the morning I called work and told them I would be in late. Then I hit the bank as soon as it opened and took half of everything and left the other half for Gina. She could also have the house. The payments were low enough that she should be able to handle them on what she made. Next stop was the Post Office to rent a box and fill out a change of address card so my mail would be forwarded to it.
When I got to work Marge (the secretary/receptionist) handed me a handful of message slips and I saw that all of them were from Gina so I dropped them in the trash can. Business had been slow and Harvey (my boss) had been contemplating cutbacks. I wouldn't be affected because I was his very first hire, but I walked into his office and told him I'd take a voluntary layoff so one of the younger guys, especially one with kids wouldn't have to take the hit. He argued that he couldn't afford to lose me, but when I told him it was either the layoff or I would just resign he accepted it. I told him to hold my last check until I called him and told him where to send it.
If I were careful money wouldn't be a problem. When my parents had died in an auto accident I was their only living relative so I got the insurance money and after taking care of the funeral arrangements I put the balance in a money market account. This was pre Gina so she had no claim on it when the divorce rolled around. It wasn't a ton, but I could live off it for a couple of years if I was careful.
By noon I was on my way out of town and I didn't have a clue as to where I was going or where I would end up.
I had stopped in Denver for a bite to eat and was idly looking through the Rocky Mountain News as I waited for my food and I saw that there was plenty of work in my line and Denver was far enough away from Kansas City so I ended up staying. Four years went by and I was never served divorce papers and I never saw a lawyer so I didn't know whether Gina knew where I was or not, but then I didn't much care either. I hadn't seen a lawyer because my mind set was let Gina or her lover pay for it.
I had no family and no really close friends in Kansas City so the only one I had been in touch with was Harv. He told me Gina called a dozen times a week until she finally accepted the fact that I didn't work there anymore. Business had picked up and he kept after me to come back to work. I did give it some thought, but I liked Denver and the mountains and I had a pretty decent job so I kept putting Harv off.
And the women, good lord yes, the women. It seemed like Denver had more single women than men and I capitalized on it. No steady relationships - I wasn't going to do that again - but I was never lonely.
The company I was working for sent me to Kansas City to attend a seminar on quality control methods. I stopped and shot the bull with Harvey and he made another pitch to get me to come back to work and I gave him the usual "I'll see." I stopped at a restaurant for lunch and I was sitting in a booth reading the menu when I saw Gina walk in. I quickly turned my head so she wouldn't see me, but I wasn't quick enough and thirty seconds later she slid onto the seat across from me.
"How have you been?"
"Not very talkative are you?"
"Don't have anything to say to you."
"That's too bad considering we have so much to talk about. Going to be here long?"
"Got enough time to stop by and meet your kids before you leave?"
"Kids? What kids?"
"You left me pregnant when you split."
"I left you pregnant? Not fucking likely. We hadn't had sex in almost six months. The daddy is most likely Tom (the guy she was kissing) or one of your other boyfriends."
"You are forgetting what you did on the night you left me. No Rob, they are yours."
"Easy enough to prove Rob. Come see them, take them to a clinic and have a DNA test done."
I didn't believe her, but what if? "If I have the time I might stop by. Give me your address."
"I haven't moved."
She sat there and looked at me in silence for several seconds and then said, "You don't feel anything for me at all, do you?"
"I put you behind me four years ago Gina."
"Call before you come so I can make sure they are there. Here's my cell number" and she wrote it down on a napkin and handed it to me. Then she got up, went to another booth, sat down and ordered her lunch.
I didn't get much out of that afternoon's session, not because of lack of content, but because my mind was elsewhere. Could I have gotten her pregnant on that last night? She said kids, as in more than one and I hadn't asked. I didn't know if she was talking twins, triplets, or even more. All girls, all boys, or boys and girls? No, they couldn't be mine. She was just trying to run a mind game on me. But still, what if. It worked on me all afternoon and when the afternoon's session was over I called Gina and made arrangements to stop by that evening.
I rang the bell and then waited and when she opened the door she said:
"You didn't have to ring. This is still your house."
"I don't see it that way."
"Let's go into the kitchen. The kids are in the backyard playing in their sandbox. You can see them through the window."
"As opposed to meeting them?"
"I have no idea what you will do Rob. You might take one look at them and run. I'd rather not have that happen to them during a face to face meeting."
"Why would I run?"
"I don't know Rob, but you did run out on me and I never would have thought you would do that."
"You know full well why I did that Gina."
"No Rob, I don't. I know why you think you left, but you were supposed to know me better than that."
"Let's not get into that Gina, it is water over the dam. I'm here to get a look at the children that you claim are mine not rehash old shit."
She walked over to the window and pointed, "There they are."
I looked out the window and saw a boy and a girl building something out of wet sand.
"Robin and Robert" Gina said.
The boy glanced up at the window and my whole life changed in a fraction of a second. No need for a DNA test; I was looking out the window at myself. I had seen photo's in my mother's photo albums of me at the ages of three, four and five and if you were to take a black and white picture of the boy and put it next to one of mine in the album you wouldn't be able to tell the difference. The little girl was a gorgeous little thing and it was clear even then that she was going to be a heart breaker when she grew up. They were fraternal twins, not identical and I stood staring at them for almost a minute before Gina said:
"What's the matter Rob, cat got your tongue?"
"I'm just a little stunned is all. What do we do now?"
"What do you mean?"
"Is there a man in your life, someone they call 'daddy' or 'uncle'? If so how do we handle the meeting?"
"No permanent man and none that were ever close enough to be called "uncle."
"No permanent huh?"
"There have been a couple since it finally dawned on me that you were never coming back."
I just shook my head and then said, "Okay, how do we do it?"
"First I want to know what that little head shake meant."
"I never accused you of being stupid Gina. What do you think it meant?"
"I don't know Rob, I really don't."
"I had to get on my knees and beg if I wanted to get laid and even then it usually didn't happen, but Tom and a couple of others after I left had no problem and you can't figure out why I'm shaking my head?"
"Tom never had sex with me! Not once, not ever! As far as the others are concerned it was after - long after - you walked out on me. Even then it was your own damned fault!"
"My fault? How the hell do I get the blame for it?"
"You got me pregnant. It turns out the reason I lost interest in sex was something caused a shift in my hormones. My getting pregnant caused my hormones to shift again. Once I had the babies and it looked like I'd never see you again I started dating. If you had stayed around long enough for me to talk to you there never would have been anyone else."
"What the hell could you have said that I would have been interested in hearing? "Hey Rob honey, I'm playing around with the guys at work, but don't worry honey, it is you I love?"