Chapter 3

I took a deep breath and told my story a story that I truly never thought I would ever be able to repeat to anyone but as I spent time with this vulnerable young woman, I knew I had to tell her... She reminded me so much of this past I had spent most of my life running from.

"Once I arrived here, I knew I was different. I didn't like it but the trouble in my life caused me to do things I now realize were of my own making. I had become cold and angry as well as more selfish. In fact I felt justified and I built a wall around me that I swore I would never let down.

I then met her. her name was Rachel. Rachel was also living on the streets as I was and doing what she had to to survive which meant doing what I had done... turning tricks. However despite the fact that Rachel and I had been on the streets for about the same amount of time, Rachel hadnt become cold or hard. In fact if anything she had become more vulnerable and more afraid. In my self absorbed new attitude I saw it and even prayed on it. I used my pain as well as her pain to my advantage and used her submission for my own personal needs as well as a way of making money. So yes I became her pimp and allowed men and women to use her as I had let them use me...

W/we were both attracted to each other so the sex was incredible. Sadly for her, she felt more for me. She saw me as her one and I was so into only me that I refused to see it. For 5 years her and I were together. When I wanted and needed sex she let me... didn't matter how I wanted it. Anal, oral, vaginal or even if I liked it rough or not, she wanted to please me and I took and took but never gave never even asked if she enjoyed it... I didn't really care."

I took a deep breath and looked at this beautiful woman in front of me and now saw that fear again and I also realized that whatever I was saying, a lot was hitting home with her. Had she been through what I put Rachel through? Her eyes also showed that she wanted to run from me and I said to her quietly with no anger in my voice at all " I promise you. I will not hurt you like I hurt Rachel. You are still free to leave anytime you want without fear of me coming after you."

I guess she noticed something in my eyes as her body began to relax and a soft smile appeared on her lips and she spoke" Sir, i admit i'm shocked but i also realize by you telling me of this, you perhaps have paid your own price for your actions?... Although surprised sir, I'm not afraid at all. I know i'm safe with you... or at least I feel it."

I was taken back a little by how she was able to trust me in such a short while after only talking to me for just a couple of hours. I also knew that besides her hair color and those pale blue eyes, she was very much like Rachel was so trusting so caring and so gentle even after being abused as she apparently had. I looked at her and told her that before she made that judgement, she needed to hear it all. I now knew that I now had a chance to perhaps right a wrong I had done over 20 years ago. I may not ever be able to make it up to Rachel, but I could make it up to this beautiful trusting creature. show her I had indeed changed. I only hoped I would get the chance to prove it to her and to Myself after she heard My story. I also surprised Myself by not even asking her name and still having these feelings of wanting to protect her as well as be her One, if that is what she wanted after I was done. I took one more deep breath and continued with My story.