The office was cold, but that was the way he had set the thermostat. It was also dark, but only because he had turned off all the irritating motion detectors. A silence that normally was kept far away due to the hustle and bustle of every day business had settled in. The only sound was the clatter of a keyboard as he hammered away. He was halfway through his work, and had used up three quarters of his allotted time. But none of that mattered right now.
His whole life was about to change, again, in ways he couldn't imagine. Five short years before, he had been going through a nasty divorce, and had moved back in with his parents, sleeping in their spare room and trying to figure out what to do with his life. Now, his mind kept saying, here we are, and look at everything that's changed. In those five short years he had relocated his entire life 3,000 miles across the country. Everything he had was packed into his black sportscar, and he drove, straight through, stopping only to catch a catnap in a rest area parking lot from time to time, all the way to the Pacific.
Since then everything had just gotten stranger and stranger. The boy he had been wouldn't recognize the man he had become. There had been some extremely hard times, but his life was better than it had ever been. Despite the close calls, the money problems, and learning who he really was inside, his life was full of laughter, smiles, and just good feelings.
After a while, the issue of a baby had come up. She was starting to get baby hungries, and he didn't know what to say about that. It had been understood, all through his previous marriage, that babies weren't ever going to be a part of the equation. Deep down he had always believed he wouldn't be a good father, and it scared him. His father and he hadn't always seen eye to eye, though in retrospect his father had done his best, and he certainly hadn't made it any easier.
After some soul searching, though, he had gone along with it, and she and he had gone off the birth control and began trying to conceive. Months passed, and she began to wonder if she was just too old. They had agreed to five months of trying, and in month five the double line finally showed.
Now there was a baby boy at home, with his mama and his big stepsisters, who all adored him. He was so wonderful, and the source of so much joy in all their lives. The man in the office ached to be there, getting the slobbery kisses, the manic hugs, or just to watch the little boy toddle around after the dog, screaming with laughter. But life doesn't stop to let you off just because you want it to.
So he sat, in the partial darkness and the chilly temperatures, and he tried to work. The work came, but it came haltingly. It was two weeks now... two weeks remaining until Easter, and a new Easter baby. The double lines had reappeared, 35 weeks or so ago and this time it hadn't been planned. A scramble had ensued, and stress abounded as they tried to make everything ready while dealing with a baby boy who was busy being a baby boy.
Two weeks... the number seemed so final. He had seen her belly moving, and felt the wonderful new baby boy inside her kick and roll and push with all his tiny might. The image of his sons was burned into his mind, every time he closed his eyes. He could picture the two of them, growing together as best friends as their parents watched with pride. He still felt clueless about how to be a father, and took each day as it came, trying to do the best he could by all of them. She assured him he was a wonderful father, but he didn't know what he did that was so wonderful. All he did was love his baby boy, and it seemed so natural to do so. And now there would be two.
The man's head had been spinning all morning, and the night before. Two weeks. Such a short eternity to wait. So much to happen in the interim, and the date just seemed to rush towards him, hellbent to arrive as soon as possible. At the same time it took the slow, leisurely pace of a glacier. Slow-moving, but life-altering. The man didn't know how his life was going to change. He didn't know how she was going to feel, and what help she would need. He didn't know much at all. But some things he did know, and so he typed.
My dear, sweet baby boy: