Chapter 64

"Give me a couple of minutes to make up a folder for Gina," Jack said.

"That's fine. I'll go put on the coffee."

I took the plate with the two cinnamon rolls on it and put it on the kitchen table, then started a pot of coffee. I went to the freezer and put the rest of the cinnamon buns on a plate and put them in the microwave, not turning it on yet.

Jack came in and sat down at the table, grabbing one of the rolls. The coffee maker went through its dying gurgles and I poured a couple of cups for us. I put them on the table and Jack said, "Do you want this last roll?"

"Go ahead. I'll zap the rest of them."

I turned on the microwave and sat down across from him.

He wiped his hands and said, "So, what's up?"

"Well, I did a lot of things today. Some of them you need to know and some of them I want you to know. I also want to find out how the shoot went at my school today with Nancy."

"That's all good but you said something else. Something we have to talk about. What's that?"

"OK. I guess we might as well get it out of the way now. I've felt kind of ignored ever since I got home. A couple of times I even thought you were mad at me."

"No, you didn't quite push me to mad. I was frustrated. Both with you and myself. And I was distracted. But I wasn't mad.

"I don't understand. What did I do?"

"I'm not sure I understand myself. I guess I'm kind of a loner at work. When I was cleaning the gym, I didn't have people around. Usually I was all by myself. I got in there, figured out the fastest, most efficient way to do the best job I could and I did it. I left at the end of the day proud of what I did. If anyone wanted to see what I did in the gym, they were welcome to check it out after I was gone. And if they needed something to compare it to, they could look at it before I started or the following afternoon when it was messed up again.

"My swimming is the same way. Yeah, I've helped the other guys on the team, gave them tips and stuff. But when I stayed late, I worked on my own swimming, always trying to find a way to get another tenth of a second, another foot or two before I had to take a breath. When it comes time for a meet, there are lots of people around. My team, the other team, the coaches and judges and the people in the stands. But as soon as I get to the edge of the pool in that ready position, I block them all out. It's like the only things there are me, the water and the sound of the judge's whistle. I don't pay attention to anything else until I'm climbing out of the pool at the end of the race. Not even the other swimmers in the pool with me. It's more than not paying attention, actually. It's like they're not even there. I shove them out of my universe. Or maybe I move into another one.

"OK. With both of those activities, Coach is the guy in charge. He knows I know what to do and he leaves me alone. The only time he didn't was that day I lost a couple of events when you left town when your aunt died. If I need anything, he's right there. But he gives me the information and then lets me use it however I see fit."

"I don't tell you how to take pictures."

"I know you don't. But it's always like you're right there. Hovering over my shoulder. Look at how this whole thing got started. You got in trouble and needed someone to take some pictures for your web page. I'm not complaining; I was happy to do it. I was perfectly happy making my hundred bucks a week, cleaning floors. All of a sudden you've got my name out there, I have a new email address and all these people want me to take their pictures. You never asked me if I was interested in doing it. You just kind of manipulated me into it."

"I thought you liked it. You're the one who quit working after school so you could do it."

"I do like it and I know I'm the one who quit so I could do more. There have been times that I've been ready to quit school altogether so I could do even more of it. That's not going to happen but I've thought about it.

"Look. If we did the web page and you said, 'Wow, these are great pictures. I bet you could make some decent money at this. Why don't you give it a try?' I would have agreed and then the two of us would have sat down and planned it out. And I'll be willing to bet that's exactly what you were thinking after I took those pictures, isn't it?"

"Yes. You know it is."

"I know it is but you never told me. Instead, it felt like there was someone behind me, shoving me towards this and there wasn't anything I could do about it. It's like it's been your idea right from the beginning, your little project and you're using me to make it happen."

"I never meant that."

"I'm sure it never even occurred to you that I might object. And I don't object to the idea. It's the way it was done. It's the difference between asking or making a suggestion and telling, ordering. The only time I've had the chance to make this my own project was when I was taking pictures. And tonight you had to horn in on that, too."

"That isn't what I meant to do."

"That's what it felt like, Jill. When you knocked on the door and your father was with you and you asked to come in, it felt like I was just a show for you to enjoy."

"Why didn't you say something?"

"First of all, I had a client right there. It's not fair to us or to her to put her in the middle of anything we might have going on. That also applies to your father. How did you feel when I told you to stay upstairs when we went back for the final pictures?"

"It bothered me."

"Yeah. How would you have felt if I said 'Stay the hell out of the garage while I'm working down there' instead? Because I had to really hold myself back so I didn't say that."

He got up and went over to the microwave. He pulled the plate of rolls out and brought them back to the table.

"Sorry."

"That's OK. I'm perfectly capable of taking something out of the microwave."

He poured us both another cup of coffee, then put the coffee pot back.

He moved behind me and wrapped his arms around me. Because he was standing and I was sitting, they ended up on my tits but there was nothing sexual about it.

"Jill, I love you to death. I know you have the best intentions in the world and there's no way you would ever intentionally hurt me. But I've got to tell you. Sometimes..."

He lifted his arms and suddenly he had his hands around my throat. Just for a second or two and then he dropped them on my shoulders. But I could feel the frustration when they were there.

"So, you don't want my help?"

"Aaaaeerrrrgggghhh! That's not it at all." I felt his grip on my shoulders. "You're the one who said it; I should be creating and taking the pictures and somebody else should do all the other stuff. What did I say when you asked me if I wanted to interview Myra if she was interested?"

"I had nothing to do with that. She said she wanted to meet you."

"No. That's not what I asked. Last night you asked me if I wanted to meet with her. What did I say?"

"No."

"What else?"

"You said if I thought she would do a good job to hire her. That you trusted me."

"Exactly. If she wants to see who she's going to be working with, I have no problem about that. But if you tell me she's the right person for the job, that's fine. I know she'll probably be flat as a board, have buck teeth and wear Coke bottle glasses."

"Does not."

"I'm kidding. I know she'll do a good job and I won't have to worry about her. It's a job you volunteered to do, one that I haven't got the interest or time to be bothered with and I know you'll do a good job. If you hire her, what do you think her reaction would be if I walked in on her with five of my friends, just to watch her work?"

"That's different. There's nothing exciting about what she'll be doing."

"If she's working with Photoshop or printing pictures it might be to some people. Interesting, at least. But I'll concede the point. How would your father react if we showed up in his operating room to watch him deliver a set of twins?"

"He'd blow a gasket."

"You're damn right he would. And with good reason. It's not some attraction for people to come to and watch. Do you know what my attention should be on when I'm taking pictures?"

"The person you're taking pictures of."

"That and light and shadows and the background and how much time I've got and a hundred other things. Guess what it was on when you and your father were there?"

"Me and Daddy."

"That's right. In addition to all the things it should have been on. I'm just glad I was able to keep Gina's attention on what I needed her to do. I figure I worked twice as hard as I would have if the two of you weren't there. I'm glad you stayed out of the way when I was looking through the shots I took on the monitor. I honestly don't know what I would have said if you'd been looking over my shoulder. And don't tell me Gina was doing it. She's supposed to be in on the viewing and the choosing. If she or I ask your opinion on something, fine, give it. But it's like mopping the floors. Stay out of my way while I'm doing it. You can look at the results when I'm done."

"I don't have any problems if you're watching me work."

"I know. That's the exhibitionist in you. We're totally different that way. But you know I'd never bring anyone else along to watch you. I would never put you on the spot the way you did with your father tonight. Do you know what it felt like?"

"No."

"It felt like 'Daddy, look at the new trick I taught Bozo to do.' Only it was me instead of Bozo."

"Jack, I'm proud of you. I would never do that to you."

"Jill, it's the way you do things. You get excited about something and you just push ahead, assuming the people it involves will be fine with it. And most of the time they would be if you didn't force them to do it. Ask them, convince them, whatever, but let the decision be theirs. You know what I'm talking about. We went through all this when you decided to finish school in one year and go for emancipation. If you said 'I'm thinking about' instead of 'I'm going to' it would have made all the difference in the world."

"So, are you going to give up on the photography?"

"Hell, no. I love it too much. Just leave me alone to make my pictures. When I'm done, I expect you to Oooh and Aaahh all over them. As far as the rest of the stuff is concerned, I want to know as little about it as possible unless it's going to affect me. Then, I want to know enough so I can agree or disagree with you or make a decision if that's what's needed. You don't need to consult with me every time you send an email. But if you decide to rent a building, I want to be in on it. And that's more than just telling me where to sign the rental agreement."

"OK. I'll try."

"Good. I'd hate to have to chain you up every time I take pictures."

"I don't want that either, but I wouldn't mind trying it when it's just the two of us."

"Yeah, I'm sure you wouldn't. Are you OK about that now?"

"I think so. Like I said, I'll try."

"And I'll give you a nudge any time you need it. I'll tell you one thing. If you pull what you did tonight in the future, I'm not going to suck it in. I'll ask you what I told you about that and put you on the spot, no matter who's there. As far as I'm concerned, that's it and we'll never need to talk about this any more."

"OK."

"What else?"

"Huh?"

"You sound like your sister. You had some other things you wanted to talk about."

"Oh. Well, I wanted to know how your other shoot went. And I did a lot of stuff today you should know about. Some of it will require you making decisions. And I didn't do anything we can't stop if you don't like it. So there." I stuck out my tongue.

"OK. Let's go out to my computer and I'll show you the pictures I took of Nancy. I'm curious to see what you think of them."

We went into the living room and I was all set to stand behind him when he motioned for me to sit down in the chair. I sat and he moved the mouse around a bit to bring up the monitor. It came up on his desktop.

He pointed to a folder marked Photos and I clicked it open. There were two folders inside: Admin and Pictures. I clicked on Pictures and saw folders for Volleyball, each of the girls he'd taken pictures of so far and one labeled Girls. I moved the cursor over it and looked back at him.

"Go ahead."

I clicked on it and there were two folders: Garage and Car Wash. I clicked on the first one and saw it was the pictures Jack took of me and Mary that day we took all the stuff down from the storage rack so he could take pictures of it and sell it on eBay. There were Mary and I, dressed like a couple of farm girls, half our butts hanging out our shorts and our plaid shirts tied just under our tits. I clicked on the pictures of Mary and me on the ladder. There was no doubt we were teasing him.

I backed out and opened Car Wash. The pictures of us leaning up against the windows in our wet shirts while Jack was inside the car put the ladder pictures to shame.

I backed out of that and Jack said, "Are you done, now?"

"Sorry."

"That's OK. I knew you'd have to check that folder out once you saw the name. Now that you've got it out of your system, go ahead and click on Nancy."

He pointed to the folder, as if I couldn't read it for myself. I didn't say anything, I just opened it up.

There were pictures of Nancy riding her bike around the track and roller skating near the tennis courts. Many of them were taken at a distance and she only took up a small part of the picture. I could see that he used his zoom to compensate in some of them but it didn't go in far enough to bring her full screen.

Nancy was dressed the same in all the shots. She had Spandex pants that came down to mid-calf and a matching top, exposing a good portion of her arms below the elbow. Both were predominantly black with some dark blue slashes mixed in. She wore a black helmet that looked more like foam stuffed rubber and pads on both her knees and elbows. She looked happy in the pictures that showed her face.