Chapter 33

At dinner that night, Mama gave me a real earful about being so rude to Brenda. I let her get it all out of her system. She finally ran down and asked me what I had to say for myself.

"I saw her at the club, with Richard. She stopped over at the practice range and we talked for awhile. We got into a disagreement about how much contact we were going to have. I suggested none, and she thought I should forget the past and start over again. That's when I started being rude. Before that, I was merely aloof and distant."

"Did you tell her you were too busy to partner with her in tennis?"

"I told her I was busy, and that there were a lot of other things I'd rather be doing. I don't want to associate with Brenda anymore. That goes for tennis, for taking her to bed, talking to her, it goes for all of it. I'm done with her. Period."

"Did you tell her that you and Joyce were intimate?" I laughed. Brenda hadn't changed a bit.

"I might have indirectly inferred that such was the case. I didn't mention Joyce by name. I think I said there was a girl who lived with us, and she let me do things with her whenever I wanted to."

"Did you accuse Brenda of having social diseases?"

"No. I said one of the advantages in the arrangement I alluded to was that it kept me from going out and messing around with girls who might carry social diseases. You don't carry any, do you, Joyce?"

"Not yet, so you better not bring any home to me." Joyce was enjoying listening as Mama and I batted this Brenda thing around. I was glad she hadn't taken offense by what I'd said to Brenda.

"I'm trying my best, but Mama keeps sending all these girls after me. Luckily, I'm able to resist most of them."

"I did not send her after you. I might have mentioned that you like to hit golf balls most mornings, but anything else was her own doing."

"I thought you were saving me for Joyce, Mama. Do you think she's happy that you encourage others to compete with her?"

"If you were progressing faster with that courtship, I might refrain from my other meddling."

"If you ever refrain, it will be because you've stopped breathing. I expect that you'll bring over one or two girls to introduce to me on my wedding day. You'll probably tell Brenda where my bride and I will be honeymooning."

"Kenny, you are really very witty. You're especially amusing when you're trying to be difficult. Don't you know that your behavior today will just encourage Brenda? She wanted you before today, but now, she sees it as a challenge."

"She might even win the challenge, Mama. There are parts of me that are still very responsive to her charms. My head though, it's grown up enough now that it realizes she would always be a huge disaster for me. So, while it isn't inconceivable that Brenda will once again know what it feels like to be pierced by my mighty sword, her chances for gaining anything more than that are nil."

"Kenny, that was vulgar, and in very poor taste, considering the present company at this table."

"Really? Joyce, did my mentioning that I might allow Brenda to enjoy sexual congress with me offend any of your tender sensibility's? Or, did it make you just the tiniest bit excited? Would you like to watch?"

"Kenny, enough!" Mama had stood up when she said that. My Dad was sitting there, still wondering why we weren't all talking about something important, like business. Joyce was looking at me with a gaze I recognized from some time in the past. A time when Brenda and I were negotiating for a different kind of meeting.

"Would you like to watch or not, Joyce?"

"If you'd let me, I would." Joyce was flushed and embarrassed. She couldn't look at any of us. I wasn't just being cruel and vulgar. I had a plan in my mind too. It wasn't a good plan, I already knew that. Still, good or bad, it was something I could do to try to clear my emotional senses.

"You need a day off, Joyce. You work way too hard. Tomorrow, we'll go out to the pool at the club together. We'll have a nice lunch and sit around the pool and get all caught up on our plans for the future. You call Emily and tell her we'll all be there, and I'll call Brenda to let her know. After that, we'll see what happens."

"You want me to call Emily?"

"Sure. I just wish Shirley weren't so far along in her pregnancy. The more the merrier. Tomorrow, I'll entertain all offers. I'll be open to whatever I think is the most fun for me."

"Kenny. I forbid this. This is no way for a gentleman to be acting."

"What's the matter, Mama? You don't like me trying to broker my own deals? These are all the girls you've been trying to set me up with. If you have more in mind for later, let me know, and I'll invite them as well. I've got an almost free summer, no attachments, why not listen to all the offers?"

"I won't have this."

"We'll even call it the "Uncle Bunny Sweepstakes". Hans gave me the idea the other night. If it was good enough for Uncle Bunny, it's certainly good enough for me. I'll need to use Hans and the limo though, just like Uncle Bunny did. You'll loan him to me, won't you Mama? You can have him back, as soon as I leave for school."

"Kenny, aside from provoking your mother, what is it that you hope to accomplish? I had thought that you'd continue working at the company, just as you have in past summers. Is this not the case?" My dad was finally getting a little worked up too. We hadn't talked about what I'd be doing over the summer. I certainly wasn't planning on raffling myself off to the highest bidder every day down at the country club pool.

"Joyce and I will come to work on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, all through this summer. We'll also spend time talking together, and thinking about business, on the other two days. On those other days though, we'll also be playing. Sowing our wild oats. I think it might be easier if Joyce and I slept over at Uncle Bunny's most nights too. That way, we could plan out our strategies without offending Mama. Are you going to lend me Hans and the limo, Mama, or do you want me to hire some stranger, someone who won't report back to you about all the sordid stuff that's taking place?"

Mama stood up and excused herself from the dining table. Dad stayed seated. He wasn't done talking to me yet. Joyce was squirming all around on her chair. She was a lot more excited about what I proposed doing than I was.

"Kenny, I realize we can't prevent you from actually doing what you propose. I will ask that you not put this plan into action until you've had at least a few days to reconsider. What you are considering isn't a wise course of action. Bunny did things because he was powerless to do what he really wanted to do. You are not yet in that situation. Once you embark on your course, you might well regret it. It will change you, altering some of your values forever."

"I need to do something different. What I've been doing hasn't been working. Everyone tells me I should start taking all these girl problems less seriously, but no one tells me how I'm supposed to be doing that. Hans was telling me about some of the wild things Uncle Bunny used to do when he was my age, or even younger. They sounded like they were fun for him. It helped take his mind off some of his other problems. Are you worried about Joyce?"

"I'm concerned about both of you. Sex isn't supposed to be a sport."

"Mr. Parsons, I'm old enough to decide for myself. If Kenny wants to take me with him, then I'm going."

"This sort of thing appeals to you, Joyce?"

"I'm not sure about what Kenny has in mind, but if it's what we talked about before, then it does appeal to me. It appeals to me a lot."

"I hope you both won't regret what you're planning on doing. I believe Bunny regretted many of his actions."

Much to my surprise, Mama was up and in the kitchen talking to Hans and Gerta when I came down for breakfast the next morning.

"Good morning, dear. Did you sleep well?"

"Morning, Mama. I slept very well, thank you. And you?"

"I had a restless night, but your father spoke with me, and he convinced me that we needed to give you your head with this whim of yours."