Chapter 5

Monday morning, Emily and I missed each other. I was surprised since she always seemed to find me before classes started.

I met her outside her Algebra class to walk to lunch together. When she saw me standing outside, she stopped and looked down. I knew something was wrong. "Emily?"

She looked up, "We need to talk."

I was too young then to know it is never good news when a woman says, 'We need to talk.' Are there any four words in the English language that will strike greater fear into a man's heart than those four? A guy says to me, 'We need to talk, ' I know I owe him money. But you never know what the hell is going to happen when a woman pulls that on you.

In my naiveté I said, "Okay."

She didn't take my hand as we walked. She led me out to the quad where we could sit on one of the planters. "Mike," she started, then paused, a hurt look in her face. "I don't think I can't be your girlfriend anymore."

"Oh," I said. Now, you must remember, I hadn't exactly gone looking for a girlfriend. So I wasn't exactly broken up over this development. The mistake was not looking broken up. I'd learn. I was about to get a lesson.

"Don't you have anything to say?" she asked.

"I'm going to miss being your boyfriend," I said. I thought that sounded sincere.

"That's it?" she asked incredulously.

"What can I say? I don't even know why you're breaking up."

"You could ask, if you even cared," she said.

I was beginning to realize that things weren't going well. I also realized that there were things that shouldn't be talked about. "I care. Emily, the stuff we all did. I'm thinking that maybe we shouldn't talk about it."

I saw the steam coming out her ears. "I knew that's all you'd care about." Then quietly, but none the less forcefully for the quiet. "I'm not going to talk about it. It's not like I want anyone to know I'm a lesbian." She turned on her heel and stomped off.

Not good. I knew that. I found Chelle and told her what had happened. She looked at me like I was retarded. "You didn't?"

"Didn't what?"

"My dear sweet retarded twin. I'm just glad I got the genes for the brains." She looked thoughtful. "I bet I know where to find her. You stay out of trouble, if you can." Chelle strode off.

I just stood there wondering what had I done wrong?

That night in our room, Chelle brought me up to date. "You definitely no longer have a girlfriend."

"Okay. If you remember you're the one that arranged it," I said.

"I know. I just wish you could have shown a little more like you cared when Emily was breaking up." I started to protest and Chelle just waved me quiet. "She broke up because she thinks she's going too fast. She isn't comfortable with all that's happening. Yes, she did like it, but she's worried that she won't be able to stop."