'Muhahaha!' laughed the evil bad guy as the young and beautiful lass ran as fast as she could, stumbling over every single rubbish bin in the alleyway!
At last, she tripped, tumbling head over heels with a loud crash! 'Oooh, my ankle!' the blonde babe cried while caressing her thigh in uttermost pain.
The bad dude pointed at the weeping girl and laughed once again. 'It appears that you have tripped and hurt your foot! You will never walk again! Ahahahahaha!'
The woman got up and proved him wrong. 'Good lord! It's a miracle!' cried the villain. 'What an act of gallantry and divine cunning! Rising to ones feet when all is lost, every last ounce of strength draining from her devastating wound!'
The blonde looked down and wiggled her ankle. 'It looks fine to me.'
The evil villain gasped. 'Lightning speed regeneration! Unbelievable! Never before have I encountered a foe with such exquisite and supernatural powers! You are certainly worthy of dying by my hand.'
'Actually I don't think I hurt my foot after all... ' replied the gorgeous blonde. She cried out in horror as she examined her fingernails. 'But I've broken a nail! I'll have to get my manicure to fix that.'
A light bulb flashed above the villains head. It appeared that some random idiot nearby had flicked a switch on the adjacent wall. 'A weakness!' he roared, 'You were silly to try and hide it from me my arch-nemesis! I shall pound your fingernails until you plead for mercy! Ahahaha! Come hither, I shall destroy you at once!'
The villain charged at the buxom blonde, stumbling over all the rubbish cans along the way until he slipped on a greasy banana peel. 'Foiled by a land mine once again!' he cursed as he landed flat on his back, groaning as his spine cracked into place. 'You're a clever girl, you know that? Planting a device in such an inconspicuous location and leading me on to my doom. You have demonstrated once again your outstanding talent. I know your ways now and will not fall victim to any more of your inventive strategies! Aahaha!'
The woman turned a blind eye to the villain and started putting on makeup. The villain jumped to his feet in surprise. 'Camouflage! Such desperate measures you are taking in this epic battle. Victory for me draws near and you attempt to blend into your surroundings with your pitiful red paint. Such cowardice! But it shall not work! I have the eyes of a hawk and the ears of a wolf!'
'You also have the brain of a retard, ' muttered the beautiful blonde.
'Logical as well are we?' declared the villain. 'I'll show you that brawn over brains is everything!'
He raced at the girl, just as she bent over to pick up a dollar bill that was lying innocently on the path before her, exposing her exquisite rear.
The villain stopped immediately, admiring the fine piece of artwork that was presented before him. 'She's morphing into something so beautiful, as if to elude my senses.' He stood with his jaw hung open. 'No... I will not... fall to... the temptation. I must... resist!'