What are you supposed to feel when you find out your spouse is creeping with someone else? Does it make you feel inadequate, shamed, confused or like you need to kill everyone that is in the room. I wish I never had had to find out firsthand for myself but nothing ever happens the way you want it to.
My wife always used to tell me that my love for impulse buying would lead to my financial ruin but I always laughed her off. She was right as it turns out but only about the ruination that is.
The entire thing was started innocently enough with me glimpsing an advertisement on TV about a voice activated recorder. They promised any buyer long battery life, superior audio and total satisfaction with the product. I fell in love and ordered it immediately.
It took one week to arrive even though it was charged to my credit card in less than a day. I tore open the box immediately and was shocked at just how small it was. I put in the batteries immediately and proceeded to do my best impressions for the next hour or so until I ran out of tape. Imagine my surprise upon playing them back to hear how dumb I sounded. I was laughing heartily at myself until I realised that everyone who I had done them for had probably been doing the same thing.
I rewound the tape and placed it in my sock and underwear drawer where my wife would be sure not to find it. I heard her car pull into our driveway so I threw the packaging into the garbage and was on my way to the curb with the bag in hand as she got out of her car.
As I ran to help her take the groceries out of the car she was grumbling out loud about how expensive groceries were getting these days. I just smiled and took the bags inside the house and went back out for the rest. She walked back inside with me this time and I realised that as usual there was no kiss of greeting or any acknowledgement of me on her part.
As we were packing the groceries away I tried to tell her about my day but from the expression on her face it was obvious she just did not give a damn. I realised at that point that my marriage really might be in trouble.
I lapsed into silence and she immediately started up about the assholes she was working with and how underpaid she was as well. I said nothing but just kept packing.
The amazing thing was that this attitude of hers had only started after Saint Judy had joined the company over a year ago.
Judy was a bright young lawyer who joined the firm of Knutz and Boultz and had immediately started trying to make a name for herself. She did at that alright, as one of the most ruthless and tenacious lawyers that you could tangle with.
She was rude, obnoxious and overbearing and also my wife's newest best friend from day one. She was a Bitch yes with a capital B and was not afraid to let you know it.
After listening to my wife bitch and moan for a while I gently reminded her that she could quit and work somewhere else or stay home if she so desired. After all I did own the biggest contracting firm in the state Dream Homes Inc, and we would not need the money.
She was putting some canned goods into the cupboard as I spoke but stiffened and turned slowly around. "Look Tom. I do not intend to stay at home and be a fucking housewife while you are out gallivanting from job to job. I do not plan on staring at the walls in this house you arrogant overbearing asshole." she spat at me.
My eyes widened in shock as I realised what my wife had just said. I fought to keep my voice down and barely succeeded as I choked my words out. "I am going to take a shower and cool off before we both say some things we regret." I turned and walked away slowly with my hands clenched into fists as the blood rushed to my head.
She screeched at my retreating back. "You fucking coward. How dare you walk away from me when I am talking to you? Get back here now if you value your sex life. Now asshole if you know what is good for you."
I stopped and slowly turned around and gave up on not raising my voice because she had just jumped all over my last nerve.
"Listen Carol to every fucking word that I am going to say." Her eyes widened in shock and disbelief when she heard me swear for the first time since she knew me. She took one step back as I started in on her.
"I proposed to you because I fell in love with you and because I believed that you were the woman who I wanted to have and to hold for the rest of my life. Our marriage was great for the first five years but recently you have changed into someone who I do not even wish to know.
She started indignantly, but I raised my hand before she could get a word out. "I am not finished yet. For the last year you have tried your best to imitate a dead woman whenever I try to make love to you. You make it seem like a chore instead of an act of love between two married people. If you think that no sex is really a threat then you need to realise that I knew my hand intimately before I met you and if necessary I will reacquaint myself."
I paused and took a deep breath to control my anger before I spoke again.
"I am tired of being constantly put down by you and I no longer feel welcome in my own home. You need to make up your mind about whether you are interested in making this marriage work or not and take the necessary steps to do so. Now I am going to take a shower and you need to make a decision now or later, it is totally up to you."
When I came back down the stairs about half an hour later my wife was sitting staring through the kitchen window. She refused to acknowledge my presence. When I got back downstairs she walked past me and up the stairs without saying a word.
I sat down in the living room and tried my best to enjoy some NBA basketball but after a while the TV was watching me as I stared off into space. I snapped myself out of it as I heard my wife coming down the stairs.
When I looked up and saw her I noticed immediately that she was carrying her overnight bag. She stopped in front of me and in a cold and detached voice told me. "I am going over to Judy's apartment and spend the night there, unless you wish to object."
I said nothing as she turned and stormed out of the house.
I walked out to the patio and tried to figure out just how I had ended up at this stage.
I met Carol about seven years ago when I walked through the doors of her law firm to set up a trust. I had won the lottery and I wanted the money set up so that no one could touch it. I wanted to use the money to expand my contracting business and I had some other details I wanted worked out.
I had been working at a construction company about five years ago when my buddy Jason who was a carpenter like me had fallen from the roof he was working on. The company I was working for refused to even acknowledge him in any way.
The bastards refused to take liability for the accident even though they did not have any proper safety equipment in place and if you asked about it you were gone. Even with my testimony and his, against everyone on the site we did not stand a chance.
He recovered eventually but the bills and being laid up really put him out a lot. Because we had both lost our jobs we decided to start up a small contracting company together to earn money.
It was tough at first but things were now starting to even out when I won the lottery for the largest jackpot ever in the history of our state. I discussed my plans with Jason and we both agreed that investing in our business was a good plan but we decided that we should ensure that the money was protected from any future relationships so he had recommended Knutz and Boultz to me for setting up a trust.
I was on my way out after signing the papers when I bumped into Carol and for me it was lust at first sight. She was short about five feet four inches tall and every single inch was curved. She was just beautiful and I just had to try my luck with her.
She gave me a hard time at first but after a little coaxing and a lot of flowers she finally decided to go out with me. She was bright and very articulate and she was a joy to talk to. They were few things that we could not discuss without her being well informed about them except for sports and my bedroom décor. The latter she took quite a while to get to know and it was only after I proposed marriage to her about six months after dating her that she became as well versed in it as me.
She told me a lot about her childhood and how hard it had been growing up on the wrong side of town. She had realised from early that the only way to pull herself out of there was with an education and she had buckled down with her schoolwork and was soon top of her class.
She was very shy at school and after her body had started to develop she had soon captured the interest of the boys but after a disastrous first date in which the guy had tried his best including force to get in her pants she had given up dating in high school.
She had found after graduating that she did not have enough money to go on to college even with a scholarship. So she had started working at the law firm as a clerk/typist and completed a paralegal course at the community college. She was immediately promoted and had been doing the job for the last five years until she bumped into me.
She always refused to discuss her previous partners with me but just smiled and said you will never lose me to any man. Her reluctance bothered me a bit at first but I decided not to dwell on it for too long. After all it's all in the past right.
We often discussed my development plans for the business and she was in agreement with everything I wanted to do even suggesting that I set up a company owned nursery for my employee's kids.
Well I took her advice on all that and after discussing it with Jason we started to slowly implement our long term goals for our company. The first thing we did was to set up full medical insurance on all employees and their families and hired a safety engineer to cut down on any accidents on our worksites.
We also set up a pension plan with contributions being voluntary and provided free independent financial advice to all employees. We also set up a credit union for staff and family members only, which allowed them low interest borrowing.
Well needless to say our employees were very happy and we had very few people quit except those who were going on to further their studies.
When we had started the business our company's quote was "You give us your money and we will give you your dream home." Our competition had laughed at us but after the customers started to realise that what we said was what they got, they were scrambling to keep up with us.
The implementation of all these things took time and a lot of mine at that but I always tried to be there for my wife. It took about five years before everything started paying off but eventually it all came together.
Strangely enough when the business was going well is when my home life started to deteriorate. It started for me when Judy started spending all her free time over at our house.
She and I never hit it off at all. I mean she just rubbed me the wrong way from day one. Any argument or debate she had to win it and her opinion was the only one that counted. You could give her facts and statistics but nothing could change her mind when she believed in something.
She was always crying down men and soon I never even bothered to speak to her any more which pissed her off even more. I just did not care. The last straw came for me one day when I was sitting on my patio trying to relax and take a nap.
She and Carol both came out and sat down beside me. I tried to ignore the both of them but Judy soon started up a conversation about how all men were all dogs who needed to be castrated. I waited for my wife to leap to my defence at least but when I opened my eyes I was surprised to see her nodding her head in agreement.