This story is a combined sequel. It is a combination and continuation of "Want Ad" and "Palmistry". This story should work okay as a stand alone story, but the two previous stories will give you some background. In "Palmistry", we learn who Bob is, why he's in therapy, his attitude toward therapy, and experience some of his pranks. "Want Ad" will give you background on the club and how Zorro came to be.
"And how does that make you feel, Bob?"
"It used to make me angry, Ann, but now I just ignore it."
"Bob, it would be better if you addressed me as Dr. Culver. Therapy is more effective if you take it seriously. A casual approach isn't good for either of us."
"That's fine by me. Henceforth you may call me Mr. Canfield."
"If you wish, but I've found using first names puts a patient more at ease."
"I'm not a patient, I'm a customer. I'll go along with whichever you prefer, formal or informal, but not both. You choose and I'll do whatever you do. If you'd rather, you can call me Mr. Baxter."
"Mr. Baxter? Why? That's not your name."
"Do you know that for certain?" I was at the therapist's. It was not going well. Dr. Ann Culver would not have been my choice as a therapist, but since she was the only one on my insurance company's list, she had been chosen for me. Nevertheless, I would persevere. After the way the insurance company had jerked us around when Meg was sick, I would be content if all I accomplished was to cost them a bunch of money.
"Your insurance company referred you as Mr. Canfield. If you're not Mr. Canfield, we have a problem."
"I'm the person the insurance company knows as Mr. Canfield. You seem to have some problem calling me Mr. Canfield, so I thought maybe you'd like Mr. Baxter better."
"Bob...Mr. Canfield, I think we'll make more progress if we return to the issue at hand."
"I agree, Ann...Dr. Culver."
"Alright. Let's see if we can summarize where we are. Your wife, Meg, died about a year and a half ago. You haven't been able to establish a successful relationship with another woman. You need to achieve closure with respect to Meg and you also have some issues with women you need to confront. This probably relates to issues of self esteem. You haven't managed to deal successfully with the grieving process."
"I'm also not dealing successfully with the buzz word process. Otherwise, you're fairly accurate on the basic premise, but you've made some assumptions and drawn some conclusions that are off base. I think you should hold off on those until you've gathered more data. I would also take issue with your self esteem comment. My self esteem is doing just fine."
"I think you're confusing self esteem with ego."
"I'd say there's a very fine line between the two, if any. Regardless, both my ego and my self esteem are quite healthy."
"Rather than debate that, let's move on. Do you blame your wife for having abandoned you?"
"I do feel abandoned. I'm not sure I blame anyone. She had cancer, she died. It wasn't anyone's fault. I suppose I could blame her or the doctors or God or the blue meanies. It won't bring her back."
"It's hard to tell from your response whether you've got your feelings of loss under control or you just aren't ready to deal with them yet. I'm sure we'll clarify that as we go on. Let's talk about your relationships since then."
"Well, first there was Jane..."
"She was the one who was Meg's friend."
"Right. It became obvious pretty quickly that we couldn't build the type of thing either of us was looking for. We're still friends and we talk once in a while, but with Meg out of the picture, we don't have much common interest. Then there was Helen..."
"She was the palm reader?"
"Right. But that was purely recreational for both of us. We're friends and talk fairly often. Rebecca was more of a contest than a relationship."
"What do you mean by that?"
I told Ann...Dr. Culver...about my encounters with Rebecca. The first time in her office, when I'd surprised her by giving her a spanking instead of having sex with her, the second time when I'd invited her to my house and then frightened her away with the help of Sharon, my housekeeper, and then described my final encounter in detail. Dr. Ann (I would continue to call her Dr. Culver as long as she called me Mr. Canfield, but I thought of her as Dr. Ann) seemed taken aback by my description of these events, especially the dessert metaphor.
"So you turned sex with Rebecca into a sort of symbolic cannibalism."
"Yeah, I'd go along with that viewpoint."
"And how did it make you feel?"
"It was one of the more memorable evenings of my life. It affected me in ways that I still don't understand."
"I find it a rather disturbing metaphor. It suggests you view women as a commodity to be consumed."
"You're a Catholic, aren't you?"
"I used to be. Why?"
"Then you've engaged in your share of symbolic cannibalism. Did you consider Jesus a consumable commodity?"
"It's not the same thing."
"I agree. I was with a real flesh and blood person. No transubstantiation necessary. Do you really want to debate which is more disturbing?"
"Let's move on."
"Right. Karen was the one I was really trying to build something with. I just couldn't seem to make it work. I don't know whether it was too soon, whether I just wasn't ready yet, or what. After my final encounter with Rebecca, Karen and I slowly drifted apart and soon it was obvious to both of us that we weren't going to make it. This is the one that troubles me. With the others I wasn't really trying. I was just getting laid. But with Karen, I tried and failed. I really liked her and as an added extra bonus, she really liked being tied up."
"And you liked tying her up? Let's talk about that."
"Fine. I love talking about that. Most of them were reluctant to be tied up, especially Sharon..."
"Sharon? You mean your housekeeper?"
"Yes, but I'll get to her in a minute. The point I was trying to make is that for me it's quite a turn on to tie up a woman who's reluctant. You take her someplace she hasn't been before and require her to surrender herself completely to you. It's a wonderful gift that she gives you. But with Karen, there was no reluctance. She loved to be bound. She loved the feeling of helplessness. Sometimes I'd do things to make her reluctant. On one occasion I took her out in public with her hands tied behind her. Other times I'd let her know I was going to spank her after she was bound. It created such a delightful discord. She would want to be bound, but be apprehensive about what came after. The anticipation as I would tie her wrists behind her was just too delicious for words."
"Whose anticipation? Hers or yours?"
"I see. And what about Sharon?"
"I still see her, of course. She cleans the house on Saturday. When she's finished, I tie her hands behind her and we inspect the house. If I find fault with her work, I spank her. Then, either way, I take her to bed. Sunday morning, I fix her breakfast and send her home."
"So you've tied up and spanked every one of these women except Helen."
"Wrong. Jane was the only one I didn't spank, but she did get tied up."
"I see. And was Helen reluctant?"
"Less so than average."
"I called her up and invited her to my house. She came right over."
"And did she know what you had planned for her?"
"Definitely. I told her that if she came over I would tie her up and spank her, then fuck her brains out. As I said, she showed up promptly."
"So you think all women would like to be tied up and spanked?"
"I think a minority of women really enjoy the idea of being tied up and spanked. However, I think the majority of women can be tied up and spanked by the right person under the right circumstances and would enjoy it in that limited context."
"That's what you think?"
"Yes. What about yourself? How would you feel about a little bondage and a nice sound spanking?"
"Let's leave me out of this."
"Okay," was what I said, but the thought that ran through my head was: "Wrong answer, doc. You're next." It wasn't what she said so much as the way she said it. There was just a hint of alarm in her voice and she leaned away from me as she said it. The predator in me took note.
This was my second session with Dr. Ann. The pattern was already clear. These sessions would be a struggle for control between Ann and myself. Having been in small business all my life, this kind of petty crap usually pissed me off. It was such a waste when there were things that needed doing and never enough people or resources to do them. But this was different. For some reason, I enjoyed it. Maybe therapy would help me answer that one.
"Let's make something clear. If we're going to effectively deal with these sorts of feelings, you're going to have to ignore the fact that I'm a woman."
"Fine. Let's make something else clear. When you say 'deal with' these sorts of feelings, I suspect you mean eradicate or cure. I'm not interested in being cured. That's not why I'm here. I like myself the way I am. I'm used to it, comfortable. Tying up women turns me on. I don't want to change that."
"So why are you here?"
.... There is more of this story ...