Chapter 11

I start making an evening meal for Tom and I as soon as I get home, despite my arse feeling like it is on fire. The days when Tom shared the household chores are becoming a distant memory. Of course, in those days we tended to eat out a lot, which we can no longer afford to do. Thanks to my pay from my part-time work for Mistress, Tom and I are just about managing to keep our financial heads above water. But I’m not sure how much longer we can keep this up. I don’t want to cut back on my time with Mistress, but the realities of life may force my hand before long. There are very few local jobs available, and none which suit my qualifications. I have three local employment agencies keeping watch for a suitable opening, but they all report a bleak outlook for full time employment opportunities in the foreseeable future.

My submission to Mistress Lyn has been a wonderful development in my life, but it has come at a cost. Ever since I left the orphanage, I have longed for someone to control me in the way Mistress Lyn is doing. But I’m aware that my independence and freedom are forfeit as a result. Tom has been tolerant of my perversion, and has even taken a lead in developing our sexual relationship to accommodate my fetishes. However, where will this all end up? How long before Tom tires of playing second fiddle to Mistress Lyn’s tune. Once I start working at The Manor, I sense that my future will be set on a course that may not have a good outcome for our marriage.

I saw the way Mistress Lyn flirted with Tom during her party. More than once I’ve wondered if she is trying to seduce him; not that he needs much encouragement. She’s made it clear that she isn’t into lesbian sex, but I’ve never seen any sign of her having any male companions. I understand and accept that she is my dominatrix and not my lover. I know that she will never have sex with me beyond what she deems necessary in our dominant-submissive interaction. That isn’t a problem for me, since I have Tom to satisfy my sexual needs. But what would I do if that was no longer the case?

I sense that once I start working as a pony girl at The Manor, I’ll be taking an irrevocable step towards surrendering myself to a form of slavery. Mistress Lyn said that she was once a pony girl and that she has now advanced to some unspecified role that appears to be a cross between a procurer and a minder. I’ve never previously thought about her status at The Manor. Her relationship with Mistress Stella was friendly, suggesting they are equals in the hierarchy of The Manor. However, most of the other staff we met seemed to regard Mistress Lyn as inferior in status to them. The security guards at the entrance gate didn’t treat her with much respect, but for all I know, that may be how they treat all of the staff. When Mistress Lyn took me on the orientation tour, she was careful not to enter any room where a club member was present. At the time I thought is was because I was dressed and bound in my pony girl outfit, but I begin to wonder whether that was the only reason.