Chapter 4

Mrs. Jenner had raised two daughters so was always taken aback when Andrew came over and attempted to empty her pantry at one sitting. Although it was only two days until Suzanne had to head through to Glasgow, they were in a fun goofy mood. She sat with them as they ate breakfast, Andrew could feel her eyes appraising him.

“When do you leave Andrew?”

“Monday morning Mrs. J. My classes start on Thursday so I will have a couple of days to get settled. Last year there was no gentle introduction it was straight into work from that first morning.”

“How are you getting down there? Train?”

“No, Leslie is driving down with me. I don’t know if we are going to go via London as I am hoping I can get my computer.”

“You don’t mind taking Suzanne through to Glasgow?”

“Mind! Not at all. I am looking forward to seeing what Glasgow University is like. We will have lunch with our friends Nikki and Fran, assuming Fran is not on call.”

“On call?”

“Yes, Fran is a pediatric surgeon at the Glasgow Sick Kids. I never have a clue what her shift pattern is. It is not a Monday to Friday 9 to 5 job. But as she has got more senior the crazy shifts have eased. They stay in the West End close to some of the University buildings so we can walk over and see them.”

Mrs. Jenner shook her head.

“I don’t think I have ever met someone your age who knows so many older people. I mean in the sense of actually having conversations with them, seeing them socially. I still can’t believe that Suzanne sat at a table with a Duke and Duchess and a MP and his wife.”

Andrew reached over and squeezed Suzanne’s hand.

“She was wonderful. She teased me, kept me relaxed and charmed everyone. You would have been incredibly proud of her. I didn’t realise how tense I was about the speech and everything associated with being in the bridal party, it was Suzanne who helped me get through it. We walked and talked for hours in Amsterdam for the first couple of days.”

Nothing Andrew said was exaggerated or untrue but the impact on the pair of them was marked. Suzanne blushed and preened, conflicting emotions fighting for control, while her mother’s smile made him sad. To see such pride from Mrs. Jenner brought home, like a sudden dagger to the heart, how his own mother never saw him that way. However much he tried to bury his frayed relationship with his parents, it popped up at the most inopportune moments.

“You always appear so confident Andrew. It really was stressful?”

“Because it was a second marriage for both of them the guest list was very heavily skewed to contemporaries, meaning that the vast majority of the guests were over 50. So first of all there were limited numbers of younger people there anyway. Freya has almost no family, so there was no obvious family member to walk her down the aisle. She asked me to escort her which was a tremendous honour but I worried about people speculating about why I had been asked. I thought it would distract from the bride and groom and their wedding day. But she was insistent so of course I accepted. When you are my height you get used to being visible, it is all but impossible for me to blend into a crowd unless I sit down. And I also had to make the father of the bride speech, well the honorary nephew of the bride speech but you know what I mean. So I was not stressed about doing any of it, I was stressed about not embarrassing them rather than embarrassing myself. Having the Duke and Duchess at the table was very helpful as it distracted me from the speech. Once the speech was over I could finally relax, but it took me a while to completely get over it. We were lucky, we found a pool in Amsterdam and swimming is a tremendous way for me to relax.”

Suzanne was nodding.

“It has become the same way with me, the exercise is great but it is more than that.”

Again, Andrew could see her mother eyeing them speculatively. He recalled the warning he had received from Mhairi about the Trusts.

“There is one thing I would like to tell you that came up this week. I presume Suzanne has told you about the computer companies and the Trusts?”

Mrs. Jenner nodded and looked at Suzanne who was looking at Andrew.

“Did she tell you the amounts?”

“No, she just said you had made and given away a lot of money.”

“The reason I am talking about this with you both now is that I recently got told that it is almost inevitable that it is going to leak to the press. Too many people know and it is too good a story not to get out. I am not overjoyed with this news but I have to accept it. Maybe if Brian hadn’t talked at the party then it would remain a secret but it was an important moment for Brian and so it is the situation we now face.”

He paused realising he was rambling.

“Mrs. Jenner, we made £40m or thereabouts and we kept just over £7m, total, between us. The Faith Campbell Cancer Research Trust received £26m of that. There are going to be reporters and news people pestering me when the news gets out. I think you both need to know this especially as Suzanne is going to be my flatmate.”

Mrs. Jenner rallied quickly at the news and she looked at Suzanne.

“You told me they made a lot of money I just didn’t realise you meant a lot of money.”

Mother and daughter’s giggles broke the tension.

“Thank you for letting me, us know. Do you think it will be bad?”

“Probably, in the sense that I despise all the self-importance yet blandness of the media. I will be safe at Cambridge at the start but Leslie will have to deal with it at the office. It will be more of an issue when I get back during the breaks. Look it may not happen but I thought you should know that it is a possibility. The fact that Suzanne lives in the flat with me will make her collateral damage from the situation.”

Andrew then had to explain collateral damage to the pair of them.

“How are you going to deal with it?”

“That is my dilemma. Brian rather shattered my preferred approach of looking at them as if they were dog shit and ignoring them.”

He waited for the giggles to stop.

“I did this because I wanted to make a difference. It is not just about the money, that is finished. He talked to me about inspiring others, showing people, especially young people, what it is possible to achieve. I think it was Mhairi that told me that I was not a typical student. They organise endless meetings, march and complain, demand that someone else do something. She told me that I say nothing and just go ahead and do something. It is a bit difficult to say that and not sound like the biggest dick that ever lived. I am at a bit of a loss, but being an arse to them does not seem like an option.”

“Do you think the questions will be intrusive?”

“Quite possibly. That is why I wanted to mention it.”

“About the two of you?”

Andrew nodded. To his surprise Mrs. Jenner just laughed.

“Well then everyone else can try to understand the two of you because I sure cannot.”

It was Suzanne who stopped laughing first and looked at her mother with a serious expression.

“I asked Andrew if he would be okay coming over and do you know what his answer was? Being truthful is always the best policy but does your mother want to hear the answers? So Mum, ask us anything and we will tell you the truth.”

Suzanne had hoisted her mother well and truly by her own petard. They sat there sitting waiting but her mother broke first and looked away. She sighed.

“Do you know what you are doing?”

Suzanne answered.

“Living our lives.”

Unexpectedly Andrew was pulled to his feet by Mrs. Jenner before being hugged. She did the same to Suzanne before leaving them alone in the kitchen. The rest of the morning passed with three trips over to the flat, one more than Andrew needed when he moved in with all of his worldly possessions. That alone made him chuckle. And got him a whack.

At the end of a long morning loading and unloading the car plus endless sets of stairs they had all the stuff she wanted to bring over unpacked in her bedroom. In reality she was getting a full room walk in closet but Andrew didn’t care. In four days the flat would be empty. Suzanne had her keys for the place and could come and go as she pleased. She borrowed the car to go back to her parent’s house, she was going to have a farewell dinner, just the four of them, and then spend the night. Friday night she was staying at the flat and they were leaving for Glasgow from there on the Saturday morning.

So Andrew walked over to Tony’s shop and studio, mentally changing gear and thinking about the afternoon. In a slightly perverse way Andrew was looking forward to photographing Elspeth. She was so utterly different to any other person he had ever photographed. It was going to be a triple challenge; in addition to the psychological challenge of getting an amateur to push personal boundaries, there would also be the technical and artistic challenges of making Elspeth feel glamourous and, very importantly, producing a product that showcased that. A series of photographs that showed her as fat or frumpy were hardly going to make her think positively about the experience. It was something new to deal with. Andrew ran into his model as he approached the shop. Elspeth had just stepped off a bus and so they walked the last couple of blocks to the studio together.

“I hope Stace remembered to bring the wine. I need a glass to steady my nerves.”

“There is not much point in me telling you to relax but this is your shoot. I am not some entitled demanding photographer shouting at you to hurry up and get your kit off, am I?”

The ridiculous statement made Elspeth laugh and a little of the tension left her.

“I know all that. That is the amazing thing about doing something like this. I know you aren’t going to make a fuss if I bottle it and don’t take my dress off, or whatever. It is my own battles that I am fighting. I watched Stace roll around on a bed naked with you taking photographs. Now sure she was hiding under a blanket but it was such a big step. And of course, I don’t want to do the same thing as her. Not that we are competitive or anything.”

Andrew smiled as Elspeth laughed at herself. He didn’t need to say much, just let some of Elspeth’s adrenalin escape as they walked.

“So you want something that is just you, right?”

Elspeth nodded.

“So what do you do? What are your hobbies? Now some of them don’t lend themselves to a shoot but my Grandma likes to watch the nags, bets on them too. My mother spends her free time in the garden. What do you like to do?”

Elspeth thought about that for a moment.

“I like to cook, well bake actually.”

“Great, we have a small kitchen set so that might work.”

“Any shared hobbies with your husband, Donnie right?”

Andrew saw Elspeth laugh.

“Eating the baking! We both have a sweet tooth, you don’t get to be my size without plenty of food.”

Andrew thought about what she said and an idea started to form. When they got to the store Stacey was ready with the wine and the two of them headed through to the studio to get ready. Tony had all the lights fired up already so Andrew had a few minutes. He nipped out to the local bakers just round the corner from the shop and bought a cake. He had his prop for the shoot.

The shoot, just like Stacey’s was in two parts. Elspeth was planning to be brave and so had dressed accordingly. The corset she was wearing was doing yeoman work but it had helped define her figure. Andrew had her pose against a neutral backdrop with a chair, side table and lamp as props. All very standard shots, and deliberately so. Andrew was trying to make this as much of a glamour shoot as possible for Elspeth. Andrew knew that a sizeable number of the shots were not going to work but as she started to relax, the smile became less forced and more natural. He was surprised that there was no hesitation in removing her dress but she handed it off to Stacey without any pause. But Elspeth had her own personal demons when it came to her body, and hers were her bum. It was huge, there was no point in calling it anything else. Now whereas with Stacey it was her tummy that was her personal demon, with Elspeth it was her bum. With Stacey, when her tummy was pressed against the bed and the mirror was catching the shot of her arse, she was happy. But that wouldn’t work for Elspeth. Even at the start of this second fantasy shoot Andrew could see that each of them would be different, and as a photographer he needed to be flexible and creative. So after reloading his camera with the fourth roll of film Andrew took the high-backed armchair and turned it round. When Elspeth knelt in it, her arms resting on the top the whole shoot changed. Flirty, happy Elspeth appeared and with the safety of the back of the chair to shield her body she totally got into the shoot. To the extent that she removed the corset. Partly it was so that she didn’t pass out, but she got Stacey to undo the two hooks and then unzip it. This was her moment of being (nearly) naked for the camera. Andrew took three or four action shots of her throwing the corset away, so that it was clear that she was topless. And the relaxed nature of the studio, some mildly ribald banter with Stacey, and a competitive desire to not be ‘beaten’ by her friend, meant that Elspeth knelt up straighter and used the top of the armchair as shelf for her big breasts. Again it worked to her advantage. A bosom that size was going to have sag but this minimised that and she bravely and patiently let Andrew take several shots to finish the roll before he turned away to let Stacey hand her a robe.

“Oh am I glad to get that corset off.”

Elspeth was massaging her body where the corset had bitten in. Andrew had finished reloading his camera and came over to explain his idea. There were three different aprons in the racks of props and costumes in the studio for use in the kitchen set.

“You said that Donnie loves your baking. Well in the same way that we did a slightly humorous album with Stacey and the different sized towels, we are going to do the same with you in the kitchen.”

Andrew led them over to the kitchen set and showed them what he was proposing. Elspeth was going to be hiding behind the small island wearing an apron. Over the course of the rest of the shoot she was going to lose her clothes, as much as she was comfortable with. That was going to be the hook.

“Think about Donnie’s face when he sees you in a kitchen gradually wearing less and less. You will have the island and the apron to hide you but as you remove each piece of clothing I want you to place it at the end of the island, out of the way, but in the shot. Then next week or next month, whenever you decide to play the game, when he gets home you can tell him you did some special baking for him. Every time you do that he will be thinking back to this shoot. In his mind you are cavorting around your kitchen naked as the day you were born. And in reality, you were probably dressed completely as normal. But it is the mental aspect. He can never un-see the pictures and in his mind that is how you bake now.”

Elspeth was taken with the idea but Stacey was laughing her head off.

“You could tell him when his mother is over.”

Elspeth’s mother-in-law was a complete battle-axe and the idea of saying this to her son, their own little code, it had Elspeth laughing as well. So she quickly changed into a blouse and skirt, her heels higher than normal, before putting on the apron. The first two rolls were easy, the mood was light, almost giggly and giddy, and Elspeth removed her skirt and blouse and lay them at the end of the island. Andrew was going to give Elspeth some privacy while she compared aprons but she was dismissive.

“You have seen them unleashed already. Who cares.”

She did have a point. And she was also keeping score. While kneeling on the armchair Elspeth had still been wearing her knickers. This time, with the double protection of the apron and island, they came off as well. So there she was, posing in her own glamour set wearing an apron and heels. And a very big smile. Andrew had six shots left on the eighth and final roll.

“I am going to sit and peek round the end of the island. The apron covers everything.”

“Hang on, take a couple more from the front please Andrew.”

Elspeth untied the apron and pulled it over her head. Then she used her two arms to both support her breasts and hide her tummy. She leaned forward slightly so her arms were resting on the island counter. Andrew fired off two shots, the second catching her wink at the camera. After that she put the apron back on and tied it off. Andrew squatted down but before he took the shots he suddenly remembered the cake. Stacey brought it over and handed it to Elspeth.

“Okay, I am not going to take a full back on shot. What I want you to do is just turn slightly so that your naked bum peeks out from the apron. Are you okay with that?”

Andrew wondered whether this would be too far for her but Elspeth smiled and waited for him to get ready. She didn’t turn all the way round but there was a whole lot more arse on show than he expected. And then it was over. A couple of hundred shots which would be distilled down into 25 or 30 for her two albums.

“You will have seen Stacey’s framed picture. There was only one obvious shot for the frame. With you there are a couple. Do you want the armchair shot or the kitchen shot?”

Andrew was pretty sure it was going to be the later, and so it proved.

“The kitchen shot please. I am so excited to see Donnie’s face. When will they all be ready?”

“Monday morning. I am off to Cambridge then so they will all be developed, printed, in the albums and framed by Sunday night. I will wrap it up in a parcel and Stacey can bring it home for you or you can come into town and collect it yourself. I will leave it up to the two of you to sort it out.”

Andrew finished labelling all the film before turning off the lights in the studio. When Elspeth came out from getting changed she came over and gave him a gentle hug.

“It is the strangest thing. That was so much fun Andrew, thank you. If you had told me six months ago that I would have been photographed naked in front of a 19 year old student I would have thought you were daft. You need to be careful. You will spend all your breaks knee deep in naked middle aged mothers.”

Andrew laughed and Elspeth and Stacey cackled away. Tony had already told Stacey to head home with Elspeth and so with laughter and waves the two of them left the shop. The silence was sudden.

“Seems like it was another success?”

Andrew thought about it for a moment.

“The key is their tummies. Both of them were conscious that they had birthed several children and their stomachs were not slim and trim. In both shoots, as long as their tummies were covered then they were much more relaxed. I turned the armchair round and once Elspeth was kneeling in it, she was a different person. It was the same in the kitchen set. I used an apron and the island and she was hamming it up to her heart’s content. Something to bear in mind going forward.”

“Well they both came out looking really happy, so I would guess it is another success. Are you going to develop them now?”

“Yes. I will print them later, maybe tomorrow or the weekend but it would be good to get the eight rolls developed and hung up. Then I want to talk to you about the land.”

Andrew worked away mechanically getting all eight rolls developed. Once they hung up to dry he went back through to the shop and filled Tony in on the last couple of days.

“We have an appointment to see Mhairi at 2.00 tomorrow afternoon. We will sign the paperwork for the company that is going to hold the property. We will also get all the paperwork signed for the two photography companies. The partnership will be later. Mhairi also suggested that we use Hillier’s for the negotiations, keeps you away from Archie, stops any personal issues getting in the way.”

“I can see how that would make sense. I meant to ask you, I created Antonio Marrone Photography, what are you calling your company?”

“Schiehallion Art Collective.”

Tony burst out laughing.

“You are not!”

Andrew nodded.

“Why not? It struck me as the perfect way to symbolise our friendship and my somewhat unusual role in your sex life.”

Tony laughed again.

“You have got that right.”

“The final thing I wanted to talk about is a potential fund that I am involved in.”

Andrew explained what they were proposing to do and floated the idea of the two of them buying in with the land at Bankhead.

“Wow. So we would get shares or units in this fund to the value of the land, right?”

Andrew nodded.

“But other people would be investing and so rather than own all of one piece of land or property we would have a percentage share of the whole fund?”

“Exactly. Let’s use half a million as the value of the land, makes the maths easy. If other people contribute £1.5m then the whole fund would be worth £2m obviously. The fund would buy other properties with the money and then the income is split by the number of shares each person has. So you would have one eighth of everything rather than one half of one property.”

Tony didn’t think for long.

“That makes a lot of sense. Spread the risk around. Will there be something to sign?”