Chapter 13

The next two weeks were full of family, friends and studying. Andrew took his Grandma and Auntie Vi out for afternoon tea on one of the days, a small Christmas treat for them, something they never normally did. Other than the issue of getting a 77 year old lady in and out of the back seat of his car it was a nice time. Small things like afternoon tea at one of the big hotels in the city were perfect fodder for conversations with their friends. They were members of different churches so two sets of other little old ladies would get told about their Christmas treat. It was never about the money, it was always that most precious of gifts, time with the grandchildren. And it wasn’t even as if Andrew was a blood relative for Auntie Vi but it wouldn’t stop her crowing. They were both a little frailer than before but their minds were as sharp as tacks, regular cards and visits to the bookies saw to that.

Andrew was not going to be able to visit Nikki and Fran that break as they were taking a holiday over Christmas. Fran was changing jobs and this was going to be the last chance for a holiday for quite some time. They promised to catch up at Easter but he was a little sad he wouldn’t get a chance to see them for three more months. The call frequency was down to one a month or so but there was still a connection and it was always nice to spend two or three days with them. They were the one happily married couple that Andrew knew, which was bittersweet given that they could not be married.

Maggie had been surprisingly tentative in her greeting when they met up for the first time since the last photoshoot. But when she explained, her reticence was understandable.

“I don’t think I am going to model any more, or at least for a while. As you guessed Tony and I have started dating and it is all new. We met through my modelling but I want to see how things work out over the holiday break and then think about it. Right now Tony is not bothered, it is not like everyone hasn’t seen me naked already but it feels different. Oh I don’t know.”

“First of all, I am pleased that the two of you have got together. I like both of you and you have both been very kind to me over the years. I have known Tony for more than five years now. I was only 12 when he first hired me, the summer he broke his ankle. As for the modelling, what do you want to do? You have told me that it excited you, it excites you, to pose naked. It was this delicious secret that no one would ever imagine. Are you okay with giving it up?”

Maggie looked at him.

“What? Are you a mind reader as well? That is my problem. Tony is fine with me continuing to work with photographers that I have worked with before, like I just said, nothing they all haven’t seen already. And I want to. Modelling was this thing for me, the naughty secret. It let me do something that really excited me, made me some nice extra money, it was mine and mine alone. But I think that if I am someone’s girlfriend then I shouldn’t be posing naked for other men. Tony doesn’t care, I want to, yet at the same time I have this voice in my head that is telling me I should stop.”

“Did you ever think about this before? You have occasionally mentioned going on dates with guys. Has this situation never happened to you before?”

“That is the thing, I never told any of the guys. That was the good thing about modelling; all the guys were strangers, I never ran into them in real life. Everything was kept separate. You remember the day we ran into each other, I really freaked out. That was when we started going out for chats. But dates or boyfriends never knew about my modelling. So this has sort of caught me by surprise, the way I feel I should act, as opposed to the way I want to act.”

It was the perfect example of societal programming in action.

“Tony has been great and he thinks you should be the test photographer for when I eventually try modelling again.”

“Me?”

“He knows we are friends outside the studio, and knows that you will be cool if I freak out and can’t take me dress off or my bra off. Most guys will get bent out of shape, you will just laugh and tell me to pour myself into a tight pair of jeans so you can take more shots of my arse.”

Andrew didn’t flush as much as he thought he should, Maggie had called it exactly right.

“Even just sitting here talking, I know that I am going to model again. Or I am going to give it a shot, see how I feel. But even if it still feels wrong to pose for other people at least I know I have my own personal photographer now who can still take me out to secret beaches and up Arthur’s Seat.”

Maggie mentioning Arthur’s Seat jogged Andrew’s memory and he asked her about letting him enter two of the shots from that morning in a competition in Amateur Photographer magazine. He didn’t have copies of the shots with him but described them to her. The key issue was Monica would not be identified, it was her shape, her form, rather than her face that was highlighted.

“You think they are that good?”

“Yes I do, and so does your boyfriend. It was him that suggested I ask you to let me submit them.”

“Okay, a provisional yes. Let me see the two shots and I will sign a release for the two of them.”

Andrew promised he would bring them to their next meeting and she could make the final decision. As he headed home he was pleasantly surprised that he had potentially not shot his final set of pictures with Monica.

The studying over the break took two forms, the final module of his 10^th computer course and a general education in charitable trusts and how to run them. The computer course was the easy one. Andrew mapped out what remained to be completed and he should be able to submit the final requirements by the 7^th of January. As the next course was not a continuation of the current one Andrew would start straight after on it. He had also enrolled and paid for the final course as well so he could do some preliminary work on the final project during the winter term. That was mundane and understandable compared to the complexity of dealing with the Trust.

Rather than do too many things in a mediocre fashion, Leslie, Julian and Andrew agreed to split the trust business into three different sections. They thought this break was about generating the money, Easter was about granting the money, and the summer was the key one; of selecting the proposals that would be awarded grants. Or so they had thought. Brian and Creighton went over the three areas briefly to highlight the extent of their lack of knowledge.

“I am going to be tough with you on all this, so don’t look shocked as I lay all this out for you. In a lot of ways you have done the easy part earning the money, but spending wisely is very hard. Think about all of the following. What investments are you going to make? You need to grow the fund to continue to make grants, so how are you generating income? Dividends, rental income, bond income, sale of assets for a capital gain? All have to be considered, as does the impact of inflation.

“You need a scientific advisory group to determine who to give money to. You three cannot understand the proposals for cancer research and treatment so who is going to do that? The amount of the grant, one-off or recurring, what are the scientific milestones, who will assess those? Lots of questions and the answers all cost money.

“Then there are the actual payments, all of which have to comply with charity and trust regulations. The government has not taxed you on this gain because it is being used for charitable purposes. You need to remain in compliance with their rules.

“So there you go, the three minute version of days and days of learning about things.”

The three of them sat there stunned at the brutal but necessary overview of what they trying to do. Andrew started to think out loud.

“That is a lot of money to spend to set up an organisation.”

Brian nodded but waited and said nothing. Brian and Creighton sat quietly as all three of them thought out loud and considered everything that they had heard.

“I think we keep the money separately in the trust and we spend the time with the two of you going through the investment options but I think we should not set up the evaluation and spending part of the process.”

This was Julian. Leslie piped up

“Oh, I see what you mean. We provide the funding to an existing organisation but let them manage the process since they are the experts.”

“What do you mean?”

Leslie looked at Julian who nodded, before she answered Andrew’s question.

“The Imperial Cancer Research Fund. Julian is right, we keep control of the money, we earned it and we can direct its use but we grant the money to the Imperial Cancer Research Fund for them to use. We can decide if we want to ask them to research specific diseases, childhood leukemia being an obvious example, or just give it to them to use as they see fit. There must always be more proposals than funding, we just increase the available funding.”

Andrew could feel the stress melting off him as it sank in. He looked over at Brian and saw him smile.

“Thank you for letting us get to this on our own. You would have only stepped in and said something if we tried to set up the next Wellcome Trust?”

“You three are bright and smart and doing this for the right reasons. We were pretty sure that you would come to this conclusion on your own, given the large bucket of cold water I threw on you 20 minutes ago.”

“So the trust is basically an investment vehicle to fund cancer research but it just makes donations to other existing charities.”

Brian nodded again.

“That will be the bulk of it I think, although the trust deed does allow you do other things, most pertinently you can fund primary research, meaning PhD students mostly. So you would be funding a search for a cure, but also expanding knowledge of the disease. Seed money for the next generation who will carry the work forward from the current researchers.”

The talk turned to generating funds and they spent three days over that break going through the options for the money and how the long term, almost perpetual nature of the trust changed the nature of their investing decisions.

“The Wellcome Trust was set up in 1936, more than 45 years ago. So you should plan on it being around for the long term, this could be something that your children manage after your death. You want to set this up for long term survival.”

Once again, the three of them looked at each other. Their children? This really was a different mindset. Andrew thought about that over the following days, mainly when he was running or swimming. They were setting up a legacy, something that was going to carry on for a long time, well past their own demise. Andrew did not know what to think about that or how to feel about it. The making a difference goal of his life plan should not seem complete, and yet it did somehow. That troubled him as it needed to be a lifelong goal, and yet how was he going to be so successful again. Computer Science had made him a fortune and yet he was turning away from it to pursue a passion for engineering. In some way was that selfish? Andrew went round in circles on this for a long time. There were days at the Pool when he was barely able to lift himself out his arms were so sore, having swum for more than an hour as his mind raced. As it turned out all three of them all had the same thoughts. They talked several days later.

“My life goal was to make a difference and I am fighting a feeling that I have somehow completed this goal. I wonder and worry that I am becoming selfish.”

Andrew started the conversation. Julian unexpectedly came in next.

“I never had a formal goal like you did Andrew but I completely embraced what you and Leslie were doing. I never met Faith, but I wanted to be part of doing something, as you say of making a difference. I am like you, feeling lost and adrift a bit. I heard Dad talking about someone on the TV and he said they had more money than sense and I worry I am that person. I am millionaire for goodness sake and I still take my laundry home to my mother.”

They all smiled at the way he said it. Then Leslie added her thoughts.

“This is an important conversation to have. We are all feeling the same way which is good in the sense that we can help each other fix it hopefully. I am going to be forever grateful to you Julian, for the suggestion about the Trust. It has ring-fenced that part of our money and although there is work to do there at least it is a task, and we have a goal to work towards. What we are struggling with is that sense of ‘what next’ and moving on from this.

“Andrew, you were the one who had the explicit goal which first I and then Julian adopted as well. What does making a difference mean to you today that it did not three years ago?”

The following hour was full of stumbles, dead-ends, thinking out loud and a whole lot of nonsense. Andrew talked about the feeling of the goal being complete, the selfishness worries he had, and the whole karmic impact on him. That was the part that made this very real. Andrew was feeling off, out of kilter, and he had come to realise that the symptoms were because he was not happy with his karmic balance. He needed to be doing something to help others. He could never have a goal of making a difference or selflessly helping others, and ever think it was complete. This was going to be a goal or goals that he would have his whole life.

“I have mentally moved on from Computer Science and I think I need to revisit that. It has been the source of our fortune and is the most likely way for us to create significant wealth in the future. We all have our own companies still and it is easy to recreate Jullesand version 2.0. I don’t know that I am going to have the time after September to work on much until I graduate, other than the holidays. We have grown as people and we have more demands on our time on a Saturday. What do you want to do?”

He gestured to Leslie and Julian.