Chapter 24: Finding Contentment

Michelle, Finally

Early October, 2000

“I need us to become lovers, Will.” Michelle said, pleading with her eyes.

“Um ... you mean ... you want us ... you want us to sleep together this weekend?” I stammered. “Like, we will spend this weekend together, making love?”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m wanting,” she said. “Why are you so surprised? This is something that we’ve been wanting to do – at least I’ve been wanted to do – ever since we met. It’s been almost twenty-five years; wasted years when we should have been together, happy, with each other. Now I’ve finally realized it, I know it means I will be sharing you with Lori and Megan, but I don’t care about that, that’s not a big concern to me. I want you, Will, I need you! I have to have you; I can’t help it. I’ve tried to ignore my desires, my feelings, but I can’t any longer. Will you spend this weekend with me, making love with me?”

“Of course, I will; now that you are sure you want to do that, I will love spending time with you, making love with you,” I said. “What are the logistical arrangements? When do you want me to get to the apartment?”

“I thought if you arrive around 4:00 in the afternoon, I’ll have some Thai food from the Blue Elephant we can heat up for dinner. We can spend Friday night, all day Saturday and Saturday night in the apartment – there’s rain forecast all weekend – and we can come back here in time to get to Church. I’ve spoken with Mary Beth, there’s no problem with us using the apartment, and I’ve talked to Megan and Lori, that are both happy with the arrangements.”

“And in the longer term? What will the arrangement be here? I assume you would want to sleep with me some nights each week.”

“The three of us kicked around a few thoughts, maybe two nights a week, you sleep with me in my room. The other nights, you can sleep with Megan and Lori, just as now. I don’t think I’m ready yet to sleep with Lori and Megan, I wouldn’t be comfortable having sex with them. Maybe sometime in the future, but not right now.”

“I’m sure we can work something agreeable out,” I said. “Now, are you comfortable with me also sleeping with Lori and Megan? Having to ‘share’ me with them won’t freak you out or make you jealous?”

“No, I’m not really the jealous type,” she replied. “In one sense, the only big change will be that you and I will be having sex, we’ll be making love – it’s just that physical expression that will be new. There’s going to be no change in the way I think about you, the way I love you, the way we share so much of our lives together, the way we’ve been working so close together for many years. All we are doing is adding another element – sex – to our relationship. The fact that you have sex with other women doesn’t change the way we feel for each other, it doesn’t change the love I have for you.”

“Sometimes I wonder why I have been so fortunate in my life to have you as part of it,” I said. “For as long as we have known each other, you have been a rock, a major stabilizing my life.”

“I could say exactly the same thing about you, Will,” Michelle said. “Every time I have had difficulties in my life, you’ve been there for me, helping me through the tough times. Just like you said that I’ve been your rock, you’ve been that, and so much more for me. So, my love for you is not dependant on us having an exclusive sexual relationship, or however you want to describe that. I feel that us having sex – making love – on a regular basis would be the icing on the cake, so to speak. I know just how fantastic it was that time, last year ... I still have erotic dreams about that evening, even though I’m not proud about my behaviour in how I set it up.”

“I think we will be able to look back at this coming weekend as when our life together, as lovers, really started,” I said. “As long as we both have the same expectations, as long as we both want the same things with our relationship, there’s no need to worry about what other things are going on in our lives.”

“So, you want to spend this weekend with me, being in bed together most of the time, making love?” she asked.

“Absolutely, yes! I’ll just have to work out what I will need to bring with me Friday afternoon.”

“I don’t want you bringing anything special,” she said. “Just some clothes to wear; I’ll provide all the food and drinks, just bring yourself, and a healthy sex drive!”

“I don’t think there will be a problem with any sex drive, not as long as you are there with me!”

“I’m really looking forward to the weekend with you,” she said. “We can go to some nice restaurants, but more importantly, spend the nights together, and all day Saturday. Now I need to make sure I will have the clothes that I need ready.”

After she left the studio, I returned to my keyboard, rubbing my chin absent-mindedly. That was a turn up for the books, I told myself; I knew that Michelle wanted to sleep with me, but I didn’t realize that she would decide on a course of action so quickly and so emphatically. It would be a great weekend, and I tried thinking about some of the things that we might do.

Thursday, I went out walking again, this time down Darling Street towards East Balmain. I stopped in at the construction site on Duke Street, things were progressing well. Chris Ramos told me that he expected to have the places ready by late November, all going to plan. I continued with my walk, through the park behind the row of terraces, taking a rest at Lookes Avenue Reserve, looking at the views towards the city. Once rested, I started walking back home, stopping for a beer and lunch at the East Village Hotel, close to the worksite, before continuing back Darling Street to Sedgebrook Terrace. It was a good walk, maybe four or five kilometres, the sort of exercising that I should try to have a few times a week.

Megan wasn’t home, she was working with the winners of the ‘Popstars’ TV show, ‘Bardot’, as they were meant to be recording their first album. I didn’t envy her that task, in my opinion, none of the five of them were worthy of the title ‘popstars’. More like spoiled brats who thought that shaking the tits and arses on a stage while they murdered a song was all it took. She would probably be frustrated and pissed off when she got home; I would see what I could make for dinner, so she didn’t have to worry about that.

I had a quick shower and changed into some fresh clothes, then walked up to the shops on Darling Street to see what I could get to make for dinner. Some fresh bread from the bakery, and some small meat pies from the deli, they were always popular. When I got back home, I gave the plants in the courtyard a gentle water, then started on my laundry, since I wouldn’t be at home over the weekend. As I had suspected, Megan was rather pissed off when she returned home from her day in the studio with Bardot, cursing about their attitudes. When I told her that I had dinner under control, she hugged and kissed me, telling me I was a godsend, and went upstairs to have a relaxing shower.

Dinner was a success, the four of us enjoyed the meat pies. Lori retrieved a bottle of red wine from the pantry (one really couldn’t call a kitchen cupboard ‘The Wine Cellar’, not like at Banksia Lodge where there was an actual cellar). Megan kept us in stitches with her stories of the five precious divas trying to master some songs, and after that, Lori and Megan asked Michelle what special treats she had planned for me over the weekend.

“I’m not going to stay anything now, and spoil the surprise for Will,” she said. “But don’t worry, I will take special care of him.”

“He will probably need all of next week to recover!” Lori said. “Just as well you’re taking next week off, Will. Now I understand why you have been taking all of those long walks; you will need to build up your strength and stamina!”

“I think you and Megan have done more than enough to build up my strength and stamina!” I replied.

“Well, I hope the two of you have a wonderful time,” Megan said. “I assume we will see you Sunday morning before Church?”

“Yes, we should be back in time for us all to walk up there,” I said.

“That’s assuming you still have enough energy to walk that far!” Lori said.

“I’ll be gentle with him, I promise,” Michelle said, laughing. “He’s not that feeble that two nights with me would leave him incapable of walking!”

After dinner, Megan and I went up to the church for the weekly choir rehearsal, the hymns for Sunday’s service were ones that everyone was familiar with, the opening hymn was ‘All Creatures of our God and King’, which, according to Fay, was one of Peter’s favourite hymns. The closing hymn was ‘A Mighty Fortress is our God’, one of Martin Luther’s most well-known hymns.

“You’ve got to hand it to the Lutherans,” Aaron said, “they have the best hymns, to be sure. And Johan Sebastian Bach was a Lutheran and wrote lots of church music.”

“I can’t argue about Bach,” I said. “There’s no comparison as far as composers go. There are some other pretty impressive hymns that aren’t Lutheran in origin, stuff that the Wesley’s wrote, but yeah, a lot of what Luther wrote – at least hymn-wise – is hard to beat.”

After the rehearsal session everything seemed fine for Sunday, so we headed back home. As we walked back, Megan and I talked about how we felt the choir was sounding, what changes might need to be made, and various options for music during various parts of the service.

“It was suggested to me that we have the congregation sing, rather than say, the ‘Sanctus’, you know, at the beginning of the actual eucharist part of the service, where there’s the introduction:

Therefore we praise you, joining our voices with Angels and
Archangels and with all the company of heaven, who for ever
sing this hymn to proclaim the glory of your Name:

“And then the actual Sanctus:

Holy, Holy, Holy Lord, God of power and might,
heaven and earth are full of your glory.
Hosanna in the highest.
Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord.
Hosanna in the highest.

“There are several pieces of music that can be used with that, I’ll see if I’ve got copies, and you can tell me what you think. I guess we’ll have to run it past Peter, because officially, the archdiocese doesn’t like too much ‘chanting’ during services, it’s ‘too Roman’, in the Archbishop’s opinion.”

“Well, Jensen can take a running jump at himself, as far as I am concerned,” I said. “He’s too reactionary, he’s policies are driving people away – he’s like that rector at St Albans – I told you what Peter told me about the couple he drove away from the church in Five Dock, because they were living together, and not married.”

“Just as well we aren’t going to that church!” Megan said. “He would freak out if he knew everything about us.”

“Yeah, Peter is pretty easy going,” I said. “I’m sure he suspects about the three – actually, the four of us, and despite that, he hasn’t said anything. The same with Allison and Jenny, he hasn’t let on that he knows about their relationship.”

“Everyone at the church is very tolerant,” Megan said. “I mean, you’ve got Fiona and Jeff – a mixed race couple, there are some churches that would look down their noses at that. Just as well, because if this St. John’s was like that, I wouldn’t be going there!”

“I agree with you. That was why I left the St. John the Baptist at Mona Vale, too many narrow-minded bigots there,” I said.

“Now, on to something that we’ve been ignoring, Michelle and you,” Megan said. “Both Lori and I are really happy that she’s reached the stage where she’s wanting to be with you, to sleep with you, and make love with you. I know she’s wanted to do that for a long time, it’s just that with everything that’s been going on in her life, she doesn’t want to rush into anything. She’s crazy in love with you, in case you didn’t realize, I don’t know what the history between the two of you is, romantically at least, but I do know there were some failures in the past, and she doesn’t want to repeat those same mistakes.”

“I do realize that, and I’ve deliberately not been pushing her, letting her work things out on her own, without any pressure from me,” I said. “I think the other issue that she was trying to work out was coping with me being with you and Lori, and how that might affect her friendship with the two of you. It’s not as if she’s an overly jealous or possessive person, but for someone not accustomed to the ‘poly’ lifestyle, it’s a big adjustment.”

“Yeah, she’s been speaking a lot with us about it, asking questions, wanting to know how we handled the situation,” Megan said. “I think the way both Lori and I were able to tell her how we first worked things out – years ago, of course – and how those arrangements still worked for us even now helped her. I doubt she will want to share the bed with all three of us, she’s not inclined that way, but at least she will be comfortable being part of our polyamorous relationship and has come to terms with sharing you between Lori and me. She suggested a schedule for sharing but wants to talk to you about that first.”

“That’s probably something we’ll talk about over the weekend,” I said.

“The four of us will be able to work something out that pleases everyone,” she said.

We had now arrived back home; I headed upstairs to work out what I needed to pack for the weekend; not knowing exactly what Michelle had in mind for us to do made it a little difficult. Did she want us to go anywhere during the day on Saturday, or would she prefer us staying in the apartment, in bed? Given that we were expecting rain, starting around noon tomorrow, staying inside might be more likely. I would pack some walking clothes just in case we decided to get outside. My overnight bag could be packed tomorrow before I left in the afternoon, that would only take me a few minutes.

After breakfast, I decided that as the weather was still fine, I would take a walk before lunchtime. This time I would walk east along Darling Street, then turn south, away from the Harbour, past Balmain Hospital towards White Bay. By the time I was close to Victoria Road, I had already walked past three or four pubs, but I felt it was still a bit too soon to stop for a drink. When I reached Darling Street, I turned up there, and cut across to the park close to the Iron Cove Bridge to sit next to the Harbour and take a break. Once I felt rested, it was back towards Darling Street, and the Sackville Hotel. It was still a bit early for lunch – but not a cold beer, so I had a drink, then walked up Beattie Street, admiring the mix of old and new buildings. I stopped for a quick lunch at the seafood place, just around the corner from home, before returning to get ready for my weekend with Michelle. I tried to guess just how far I had walked, at least four kilometres. I should see about getting a pedometer, just to keep track of how far I walked each day, not that I had any idea where to get one. Maybe a sports store, Mick Simmons in the city perhaps, not that I really needed to know how far I had walked, it was just of academic interest.

At least while I wasn’t working, I had the time during the day to get out and walk, the exercise was good for me, and I was seeing a lot more of the area where I lived. I felt good, invigorated after each walk; the weather wasn’t too hot during the day to be out walking. It would be a different matter, come November, summer was too warm to be out in the middle of the day, walking.

Time to get ready, I went to the bathroom, had a shave, then a shower, washing my hair, making sure I would be reasonably presentable for Michelle. Once I was clean, I packed my bag of toiletries for the weekend, put some clothes on – a pair of casual pants, a light cotton shirt, and some shoes, made sure I had everything I would need in my overnight bag, then called Michelle, to let her know I was on my way. I walked to the garage, backed out, and started to drive to St Leonards. The traffic was light in the early afternoon, it didn’t take long to get to the city – at least to the Western Distributor, driving across Darling Harbour, onto the Bridge, and then taking the North Sydney exit. The weather forecasters had been spot on with their forecast for today; the nice sunny spring morning had changed while I was getting ready, there were now dark clouds building up to the southeast, and as I start driving up through North Sydney, the first raindrops started to fall. A few minutes later I was driving into the office car park, then it was up in the elevator to the floor where I would be staying with Michelle.

She opened the door the instant I knocked on it; she was naked, except for a sheer lacy wrap, which left absolutely NOTHING to the imagination. She wrapped her arms around my neck, leaping up hug me, her legs wrapped around my thighs. I put my hands under her backside to support her, just as well she was light! Her lips locked onto mine, and we kissed passionately as she ground her body against mine.

“I am so glad you are here,” she said, pausing the kissing. “But I suppose you guessed that! I think we should move inside...”

She released her legs from around my thighs, and I let her slide back down to the floor. She pulled me inside, I left my bag next to one of the chairs, she closed and locked the door, and we headed to the bedroom. She had prepared the bedroom for us; the bedside lights had been drapes with fabric, there were several vases filled with native flowers on some of the flat surfaces, and the blinds were open, letting light in from outside. I had noticed, when I walked past the dining table, that the table had been set for dinner; she had mentioned that she would have Thai food from the Blue Elephant for us.

“Now, let me get you undressed,” she said, starting to unbutton my shirt.

It was a matter of well under a minute before I was naked, my clothes in a pile on the floor, and Michelle was guiding me towards the bed. I lay down on my back, Michelle next to me; she leaned over and started stroking my prick.

“I love your prick,” she said. “He’s the perfect size, not too long, thick enough so I can feel him inside me without feeling I’m about to be split in half. He’s the nicest prick that I’ve ever had inside me.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever had it described that way,” I said. “The ‘perfect size’, I’ll take that.”

“Don’t downplay it, I don’t know where this fascination with monster-sized cocks came from,” she said. “I can tell you – from painful experience – bigger is definitely not better! If a guy’s prick is too long, then – unless they are very careful – they pound against the cervix. Same as being too thick – I mean, I like feeling that I have something inside me, but I don’t need to feel like my vagina is about to be split in half!”

“That makes sense, I guess it’s the same with breast sizes. There are some guys who go crazy about large breasts, as if the size of them is all that matters,” I said. “But there are some that are just far too big! For my tastes, yours are the perfect size, not too small, but not humungous!”

“Who was that black woman, do you remember she came over when Alonzo and Roz got married, back when we were all at Erskineville. She was massive, I bet her back is causing her pain from all the weight of them,” Michelle said.

“Thornese Thomas,” I said. “I guess ‘bigness’ ran in the family, Alonzo was rather ‘large’, too. Poor Roz took a while to adjust to it!”

“I remember her telling us about that,” Michelle said. “Now, not only is your prick the perfect size for me, but I love how he tastes.”

She knelt up next to me, leaning over so that she could suck my prick. She took hold of my shaft, and started licking around my knob, causing me to shiver from the intense pleasure. She slid her lips around my knob, bobbing her head up and down, swirling her tongue around my knob as her lips massaged my shaft. I could feel myself getting more and more aroused, and if Michelle continued for much longer, I would not be able to hold back from my orgasm.

“Michelle, if you keep that up ... I won’t be able to hold back,” I said.

“Mmmmpf ... don’t hold back,” she said, raising her head briefly, before resuming sucking and pleasuring my cock. “I want to taste you in my mouth, Will, come for me.”

I didn’t want to disappoint her, so I closed my eyes, and let the wonderful sensations coming from my cock envelop me. Damn, she was fantastic at sucking my cock, she would bring me to the point where I felt my orgasm was imminent, then she would back off, let me cool down, then start increasing the pleasure again. I was starting to doubt if she would actually go all the way, get me to the point of orgasm, when she took the whole length of my shaft into her mouth, and pressed the tip of her tongue right at me pee hole, while she squeezed with her lips. I groaned, I could feel my orgasm start, there was a hot surge as my spunk rushed up my shaft and blasted into her mouth. She kept her lips tightly sealed around my shaft, sucking each spurt down while continuing to massage my knob with her tongue.

Despite me shooting what felt like a massive amount in my orgasm, she didn’t let a drop escape her mouth; when I had finished, she released my prick from her mouth, sat up next to me, and licked her lips.

“That’s what I was talking about!” she said. “I love doing that, I love the feeling when you erupt into my mouth, it’s such a huge turn on!”

“You do that so well,” I said. “That was such an incredibly intense feeling, I need time to catch my breath and recover from that!”

“That was how I wanted this weekend to start, me giving you a special treat,” she said. “Plus, I really enjoy doing that to you, giving you that sort of pleasure.”

“Now, what if I return the favour?” I suggested. “Why don’t you straddle my face, and let me taste you?”

“You can see how I prepared myself for you, too,” she said. “Tell me if you like how smooth my pussy is.”

She swung a leg over my face and lowered her pussy to my mouth. I could see that she had removed most of her pubic hair, all that was left was a trimmed tuft, just above her pubic mound, the rest of the area was smooth. I wondered if she had shaved, or had the area waxed, when I pressed my lips and tongue against her, the smoothness of the skin, and the absence of any stubble led me to believe she was recently waxed. There was plenty of wetness flowing, and as I pushed my tongue between her labia, I could feel and taste more of her juices starting to flow.

I placed my hands on each side of her backside, pressing her pussy harder against my lips. I could feel my tongue pushing her labia apart, and I pushed the tip into her opening, trying to move it in deeper. She was too tight for me to make much progress, so I moved my tongue up and lapped around her clit. I could her Michelle start to moan, and she pushed her hips towards me. As I kept licking her, he moans became stronger, and more and more warm juices flowed from her around my face. She cried out, and I felt her push down hard against my mouth, jerking as she came.

She pushed her body up, then moved down lower, so that she was straddling my hips, and taking my prick in her hand, guide me into her as she lowered her body on my groin. She groaned loudly as she enveloped me, and paused when I was completely inside her.

“Oh my God, you feel so good in there,” she sighed. “Now lie back, and let me fuck you!”

She started to ride me, moving up and down slowly, letting her cunt slide around my cock. She had her hands on her breasts, massaging them and playing with her nipples, talking softly to herself.

“I love having your cock in my cunt,” she said. “My CUNT, you make me feel so naughty, I want you to fuck my wet, aching cunt.”

She kept on talking to herself in that manner, and it appeared that the more she spoke, the more aroused she became. Her moaning and talking became more intense, then she squeezed her breasts tightly, stopped moving for a few seconds, then groaned loudly, expelling her breath, and releasing her clenched muscles.

“Oh, fuck yeah, that’s what I needed!” she cried out. “Can we change positions? I want to try something.”

She moved off me and lay on her face on the side of the bed, her hips at the edge, and her legs hanging over the side. I guessed what it was she wanted to try, Monica and I had tried the same position at one time; however, Michelle’s legs weren’t quite long enough to reach to the floor. I stood up, and moved in behind her, standing between her thighs, with my cock pressed to her pussy. I held her hips, moving her slightly so that my prick lined up, then I slid inside her.

“Oh yes! Take me, fuck me hard!” she groaned.

I got into a rhythm, I stood against the side of the bed, I could just rock back and forward, sliding in and out of her. I pulled her hips up slightly, to change the angle that my prick was sliding into her, putting more pressure on the underside of my shaft. I was getting close to coming, I increased my speed, pumping in and out faster, Michelle was moaning, imploring me to ‘fuck her cunt’, to ‘spurt inside me’, and similar comments. I tensed my muscles, closed my eyes, and felt the familiar hot surge. I let my breath out with a deep groan, pushing even deeper into her as my sperm pumped into her, my hands pulling her tightly to me.

When I finished, I pulled back out of her, and collapsed on the bed next to her, panting for breath. She rolled over, and stood up, about to head into the bathroom.

“I need a pee, and to clean myself up, before all of that runs out onto the mattress,” she explained.

I lay on my back, waiting for Michelle to return, which she did in a minute or two.

“That was a great start to the weekend,” she said. “That was just what I needed, some good, hard fucking, and some intense orgasms! Thank you, I hope I didn’t shock you with some of my language, I don’t know why I get so crude, so wild with what I say when you are doing that to me. I feel like I’m somehow reverted to some primal, wild sexual animal, all I can feel is what you are doing to me, how you are sliding in and out ... I can’t control what I say, and when I recall what I said, the words I used, I feel a bit embarrassed; you know I’m not really like that!”

“Whatever you say, whatever words you utter in situations like that, they don’t really bother me. Just be yourself, don’t worry that something might offend me, or I’ll think badly of you,” I said. “Actually, hearing you saying things like you do turns me on, it’s exciting, erotic, I know that you must be very aroused because of what we’re doing.”

“I know, and I feel like that too,” she said. “It’s just, I don’t know, there are times like just then, I want to feel like you are taking me, forcing me to have sex, treating me as just a spunk vessel, just someone to fuck, if that makes sense. I know you don’t think that way, you don’t use me, but I have these strange desires. Other times I want it to be tender, loving, gentle; there will be plenty of time for that. But just then, I was so incredibly horny, I just wanted to feel you inside me, pounding into me, fucking me just so you would come inside me. Funny, isn’t it, the way our desires work.”

“Yeah, I told you about the experiments Lori and I did with BDSM, years ago,” I said. “I stopped the playing early, because I was enjoying it too much, I was finding that I got pleasure from using a leather crop on Lori’s backside. It scared me that I could be that way; it’s the complete antithesis of what I felt I was.”

“I think – and I have no personal experience of this – but my fear with any of those sorts of activities, it’s too easy for things to get out of hand,” Michelle said. “Now, when we are playing here, and I tell you to force me down onto the bed, or I start talking absolute filth about you ‘fucking my cunt’, that’s one thing. It’s us enjoying sex play with each other. But once you start to tie someone down and inflict pain on them, both of us would need that absolute trust that if either person says – what did you call it, the ‘safe word’? – if either person says the safe word, everything stops instantly. There’s a huge level of trust involved there.”

“Well, since neither of us feels comfortable with those activities, we don’t have to try them” I said. “There are plenty of other things that we can do; things that we know we will both enjoy.”

“I agree,” she said. “Now, do you think you might enjoy a shower with me, before we have our dinner?”

“That’s an excellent idea,” I said. “Looking outside, that rain seems to be set in; just as well we don’t have to go out for dinner. It was such a lovely morning, too, the weather is very changeable at the moment.”

“I think the forecast for tomorrow is scattered showers all day,” she said. “Probably a good day for us to stay inside...”

“I wonder what the weather will be like later this evening,” I mused. “It’s raining steadily at the moment, but earlier on, as I was driving here, it was just light and misty.”

We headed off to the shower, what I really liked about these apartments was that each bathroom had a proper shower – not a shower built over a bathtub, but a decent sized walk-in shower, with room for two people. That was one of my stipulations when we had the accommodation floor originally fitted out, and I was glad I had insisted on that. Of course, Michelle and I did more than just wash each other, and the shower took at least three times longer than was srictly necessary for cleanliness. Eventually, we turned off the shower and dried ourselves, Michelle suggested that there was no need for clothes when we had dinner.