Chapter 23

The girls woke before 7am and went to the dining hall for an early breakfast, a few girls were already at tables, they looked like they’d already been out for a run before breakfast. Lucy didn’t understand that mentality at all, she only ran when she was late for something, and only then if she’d be in real trouble for being late, boobs the size of hers didn’t make running around a pleasurable experience, well not for her at least, Gabbie didn’t mind watching Lucy run.

They each collected cereals and a couple of slices of toast and took them to their usual place on the long table in the middle of the dining room. Gabbie wasn’t eating, Lucy spread a thick layer of marmalade on a slice of toast and made Gabbie eat it.

“I feel sick,” Gabbie complained.

“Please, try to eat, you’ll faint from hunger if you don’t.”

“I don’t want to throw up in front of over 500 people.”

“You won’t throw up, just think about Glasgow, there were over 300 people in that room and you were fine.”

“But I couldn’t see them.”

“You knew they were there though. Today there’s no way to block them out visually, so how about you try to ignore them, focus on two places, the sheet you’re reading off and the wall at the back, not the people in between, if you have to look at the people, how about before everything starts you look for Millie and Lizzie, see where they’re sitting and only ever look at them.”

“That’s a good idea, yeah, I’ll do that.”

Millie came for them as Lucy was clearing their plates away and she walked with them over to the sports hall.

The site team had been working hard, the bleachers had been pulled out, floor mats and additional floor level seating set up, and a small stage built with the lectern from the theatre, a drinking glass and jug of iced water was on a small table by the lectern. Dr Melrose had thought of everything to help Gabbie.

Lucy stepped onto the small stage and helped Gabbie and Millie up. The lectern had a microphone on a flexible arm, Gabbie adjusted the arm so the microphone was just right then she read through the statement to the mostly empty room, the echoes off the walls freaked her out a little, but they’d be gone once the room was full of people.

“Where are you sitting Miss Warner?” Lucy asked.

“I don’t know, anywhere I’ll fit once all the pupils are in, I suppose.”

“Well, Gabbie needs a friendly face to look at when she’s speaking, so it would be good if she didn’t have to search you and Lizzie out.”

“Ahh, I see, that’s actually a good idea. Our house will be sitting in the middle of the top two rows, I would normally sit with the girls, but to give you two places to look I’ll sit near the front, I’ll ask Lizzie to sit right in the middle of the top row, how does that sound?”

“Amazing, thank you so much Miss Warner.”

“For god’s sake Gabbie, call me Millie, please, you make me sound like an aging spinster when you call me that.”

“Ok Millie,” Gabbie said with a laugh, “you are most definitely not elderly, I bet you’re not much older than Lucy’s brother Steve.”

“I’m a bit older than Steve, he’s Year 13 now isn’t he?”

“Yeah, he is.”

“That makes me 5 years older than him.”

“Pretty close then.” Gabbie said.

“What are you suggesting?” Millie asked, slightly alarmed.

“Nothing beyond the fact you’re not an elderly spinster is all.”

“Ok,” Millie said warily, “anyway, are you ok for me to let people in?”

“Yes, the sooner they come the sooner this nightmare is over.”

Dr Melrose came in first and hopped on the stage, he shook Gabbie’s hand, and suggested she take a seat until he’d welcomed everyone and introduced her, Gabbie gratefully took a seat next to Lucy and squeezed her hand tightly.

The hall was quickly filled, the final arrivals having to stand around the walls, Gabbie was horrified, “so many people, where have they all come from?”

Lucy looked around, pupils in uniform, pupils in sports kit, site staff in overalls, cleaning staff, housekeepers, chefs, office staff, even the chaplain and the captain of the Army Cadets dressed in his camouflage gear.

Yes, so many people, Lucy gave Gabbie’s hand a squeeze, she leaned in close and whispered in her ear, “you’ll be fine, look at the paper, look at the back wall, Lizzie and Millie, don’t look anywhere else. I’m right here, draw strength from me if you need to.”

With the doors closed Dr Melrose switched on the microphone and addressed the school.

“I’m so sorry to bring you all here this morning, I know this assembly will eat into your first period of this new half term, but I’m afraid I’ve had to call you here to stamp out some very ugly rumours that have been circling concerning Gabbie Dixon...”

“Temple...” Gabbie whispered.

“Oh yes, sorry,” he whispered back, his hand over the microphone, “but you can bring that up.”

“Yes, rumours. Damaging, potentially slanderous rumours about one of our pupils, a pupil who has done nothing wrong but be born into a tragic family, I was going to read a prepared statement, but Gabbie has decided it’s best if she tells the truth herself.”

Dr Melrose stood aside and let Gabbie step to the lectern as he sat in the chair she’d vacated. He looked down and realised his knee was touching Lucy’s and shuffled his chair away embarrassed, Lucy gave him a quick smile.

Gabbie stood stiffly at the lectern for a minute, her knuckles white as she gripped the sides.

Both Lucy and Dr Melrose whispered, “are you ok Gabbie?”

She shook herself and let go of the lectern, looked around the room quickly, found Millie and Lizzie then looked back down at her statement, the whole room was silent when she spoke.

“Hello,” she started nervously, when she realised her voice worked fine she relaxed a little and continued, “you might know me, you might not, I’m Gabbie. Last week I was Gabbie Dixon, this week I’m Gabbie Temple, next week I’ll also be Gabbie Temple.”

There was a little confused laughter in the crowd, Gabbie ignored it and carried on.

“I’m sure you’ve all heard the rumours, I’ve heard a few myself, apparently I wiped out my whole family last week. Let me tell you, I’ve been tempted in the past, maybe not my brother, he’s lovely, and still very much alive. So’s my mum, she’s alive, she’s currently in a cell somewhere, but she’s alive. My dad, he’s not alive, and that’s where the rumours started.”

Lucy looked at Dr Melrose and shrugged, Gabbie had gone off script, but she was doing ok, so whatever, just let her carry on.

“I’ll wind the clock back a few years, I was 10, I’d just suffered the trauma of my first period...” a lot of the girls offered sympathetic looks, the boys looked uncomfortable, “ ... that night he came in my room and raped me for the first time.”

Silence, utter silence and open mouthed astonishment.

“It happened a lot after that. Not just the rapes, there was worse stuff that I’m not going to talk about. It happened until I was 13 and my mum sent me to a boarding school, not here, a different school, it wasn’t as nice as this one.

“You know how you look forward to the holidays? I never did, as bad as the school was, home was worse. And while I was at school he was preying on other girls. He got one poor 11-year-old pregnant. I think he killed her mum as well, the police are looking into that.”

She paused for a drink, Lucy noticed her hands were steady as she held the glass, she was doing ok.

The room was still silent, not even the slightest murmur.

“Anyway, last week. I’d spent the first week of the holidays having the best time with Lucy and her brother Steve in Glasgow, we did the museums and art galleries, went to nice restaurants, I even sang in a nightclub, it was fantastic. So you can imagine how far my world collapsed when I found out on the way home that my mum had been arrested for killing my dad.”

She paused and took another sip of water, her hands were shaking now, Lucy gently touched Gabbie’s leg and whispered, “you’re doing great.” Gabbie put the glass down and gave Lucy’s hand a quick squeeze, “this is the bad part, I hope I can keep calm,” she whispered back, then she looked up, eyes locked on Lizzie’s and she resumed.

“Remember how I said he got an 11-year-old pregnant? Well last Saturday he did terrible things to that poor toddler, his own child, horrific things that led to the death of that poor child, she wasn’t even 3, still a baby and my father killed her,” Gabbie screamed, “and you lot turned that tragedy round and made it that I was somehow the villain.”

Lucy stroked Gabbie’s leg, “it’s ok,” Gabbie whispered, “I’m actually still in control here, I’m making these people feel as bad as I did.”

Lucy looked at Dr Melrose, “I’m ok with her carrying on,” he whispered, “this might do everyone some good.”

Gabbie took another sip, she carried on, quieter now, “do you have any idea how that made me feel? I’m one of the victims, but your ugly rumours turned me into the villain. This is not a good look for everyone to wear, the victim blaming, us girls get that a lot, if we go with a boy we’re sluts, if we don’t go with a boy we’re cock teases, we can’t do right, so I suppose if we’re the victim of horrific mistreatment it’s our fault, well let me tell you, we’re not to blame for the actions of others. I’ve been tormenting myself for years, but the goddess that is Lucy Temple, she has calmly and lovingly made me realise that I am not to blame for his actions, just because I was born with a vagina does not make me an object for the satisfaction of men.”

She took another sip of water.

“I’ve digressed a little, but I think you get the point. Your rumours were so far from the truth they’d almost be laughable if I wasn’t the target, so the takeaway from this assembly is this, be very careful about making shit up about other people, try to think how you would feel if the tables were turned.”

She took one final sip of water, Lucy saw her hands were steady again.

“The silver lining in this mess is Lucy, she is such an angel, so is her mum, Diane. She came all the way up to my hometown just to help me in a police interview, then she agreed to be my legal guardian while my mum’s in prison. So that’s one reason why I’m now called Gabbie Temple, the other is that I’ll be marrying Lucy at Easter when the first part of the rest of my life will be complete.”

The silence was broken, the whole room chattered in amazement at the bombshell Gabbie just dropped.

“Thank you for coming to my TED Talk, I hope we all learned an important lesson today.”

Dr Melrose stood and Gabbie almost dived into the chair he vacated, “shit, did I go too far?” she asked Lucy.

“I don’t think you did, I think you said exactly the right thing.”

Dr Melrose was trying to bring the noise level down so he could speak.

“Please, calm down everybody...” when the noise subsided he continued, “well, that’s not the statement we wrote last night, the language was somewhat less restrained, but I think it addressed the issue in a much more forthright and honest manner, and I hope you all take on board the importance of not spreading rumours, because not only do you devalue the truth, you negate the effect on the victims, as Gabbie so honestly expressed, you are in danger of turning the victim into the villain. She also touched further on victim blaming, this is a very important topic and something we will be addressing during life skills classes later in the year, so thank you Gabbie for introducing that.”