Chapter 4

The conductor was coming down the aisle telling us which town we were next stopping at next, his cheery demeanor making me smile and think of better times ahead, hopefully. I was still some five hours from my town and then another stagecoach trip to Clear water, probably a good day and a half still to go. The thought of being so far from my family adding to my good humour.

I had been studying my fellow passengers for the last few hours, trying to figure out their stories and work out what kind of people they were. Of course, it was based solely on appearances, so not very scientific but nevertheless I carried on. The young men just down from me, four of them, with their cowboy hats, were obviously cowboys or gunslingers, maybe both but very dangerous looking and very handsome, to be avoided at all costs, I thought, giggling silently.

The soldiers further down, maybe five or six of them, were going back to fight the Indians after spending a week in the best whorehouses Chicago had to offer. Again, to be avoided. Primarily because there was no officers and they looked particularly unkempt. Plus, I’m sure they were all squaw rapists.

The family on the other side of the aisle, four of them, the parents and two boys, who were constantly staring at me, were on their way home after attending a grandparent’s funeral. They had a small homestead and were very poor, their clothes making this very apparent. The two boys were about fourteen or fifteen and at that age when all they could think about were girls. I concluded they would probably remain virgins for many years to come. It wasn’t that they were ugly, one was quite handsome but they lived in the middle of nowhere and there were only a few other families nearby and the chance of finding a girl to do it with was surely remote.

I smiled at the handsome one, trying to imagine him fumbling with my dress in an attempt to have me, making him blush as he smiled back. He was sweet and I hoped my class in Clear Water had some nice young men like him.

The other men near me were probably bankers or cattle barons, all of them in their suits looking rather splendid, smoking fine cigars, the smell heavenly as it drifted through the carriage. Two of them, a few seats behind me, had walked past a few times now, to the toilet I think but each time taking a very good look at me and making no attempt to hide their appreciation of my looks. It was flattering and I smiled back letting them know it was ok to look.

Directly opposite me were two old ladies, sisters I had decided, they looked so alike. Both were a little unpleasant, making no attempt to engage with me when I tried to start up a conversation. They had never been married and never had sex, that’s why they were so bitter and only ever talked to each other, sad but there you go.

My back was really hurting me, stinging like crazy and every time I moved it would rub against my clothing and make me wince, causing the old ladies to look at me disapprovingly. I wanted to show them my welts and tell them to be nicer but decided it wouldn’t help, they would still not like me. I kept my dress on and looked for more distractions, hoping the pain in my back and bum would subside a little.

The young boy was still staring as I looked around, his face a little sad as he shuffled in his seat, obviously feeling a little awkward. I wondered if I should talk to him, ask him his name and how he was getting on at school? Tell him I was a teacher, maybe. We had so far to go still it might be nice chatting, what harm could it do?

First, I would go for a stroll down to the engine and then the toilet, give my bum some much needed relief and use my muscles, it had been hours sitting doing nothing. I had tried not to think about what had happened to me lately, especially daddy, it hurt too much knowing what he did and how he must have thought so little of me to do such a thing. However, being on the train with so many men and having them all stare at me with obvious lust, just kept reminding me of how men are, all of them, no exceptions.

The soldiers were the worst. As I passed them, they all made lewd comments, no manners at all and so disrespectful. I ignored them of course, not giving them the pleasure of being offended, much to their annoyance.

When I returned, they tried again, one of them rubbing his cock and offering me the chance to sit on it. Again, I ignored them and returned to my seat, smiling back at the boy as he continued to stare at me. I decided to talk to him, hopefully giving me something to help pass the time.

‘Hello, I’m Mary. May I ask your name? I’m on my way to take up a teaching post in a town called Clear Water. Do you attend school?’ I asked, all rather hurriedly, I felt somewhat self-conscious standing there.

His parents looked at me and smiled as he answered: ‘Jed, Miss and yes, I go to school, when it’s on that is.’

His name was Jed? Jesus, what were the chances of that? I thought. His brother then told me his name, Hank, after his dad. Both parents chipped in with theirs as we begun to chat.

‘Did you say Clear Water, in Wyoming?’ Hank senior asked.

‘Yes, do you know it?’

He laughed and smiled broadly, as did the two boys, before answering: ‘Well, would you believe it? That’s where we live, about five miles outside on our homestead and both boys go to school there. I guess you’re the new teacher.’

We all laughed and began to relax a bit more. They told me about the town, though they seemed to be holding something back and were a little concerned I was to be on my own there, telling me to hurry up and marry. I smiled and told them as soon as I find the right man.

Young Jed was very keen to talk to me, asking me all sorts of questions, his mother having to intervene a few times when he got a little too personal. I didn’t mind, he was so nice and seemed genuinely interested in my life. He couldn’t believe I left a big house with servants to come out west, asking if he could come back there with me next time I went home. I laughed and agreed, telling him he could be my chaperone and then having to explain what a chaperone is, much to his mother’s amusement.

The time flew by and we were soon at our destination. We all waited together for the stagecoach which would travel overnight to Clear Water, arriving sometime in the afternoon. Luckily, we were waiting in a good hotel and they let all the women bathe and have use of a room for changing. I couldn’t wait to get out of this dress and wash, hopefully giving my flesh some air to help it heal. We had to share a room, so me and Martha took one and waited for the hot water. Martha was in her thirties, telling me she had got wed aged fifteen and had Jed when she was eighteen, he was fourteen and Hank thirteen.

When the water arrived, I stripped and got in, a curtain between our two tubs protecting me from Martha’s eyes. We chatted as we bathed, she was really nice and told me I was welcome at their place anytime and would be offended if I didn’t come have dinner with them at least once a week, which I happily agreed to.

I was drying myself, trying hard not to touch my wounds, when I heard a loud gasp. I turned quickly and there was Martha staring at me, a look of horror on her face.

‘Oh my, you poor thing, let me have a look.’ She said, coming to me.

I didn’t know what to do, I was so embarrassed I started to cry, hiding myself from her gaze.

‘No, no, come here, let me have a look, I have something I can rub on that, it will ease the pain, you poor girl.’ She insisted, taking me in her arms and holding me.

I let it all out and began blubbing, clinging on to her tightly.

‘Oh Mary, who did this to you? It must be so painful?’

I couldn’t answer, I was crying too much and she felt so good I didn’t want to move. She held me for ages, letting me calm down before releasing me and telling me to lay on the bed, which I did. I don’t know what she had but she begun rubbing into my back and bum, her hands so gentle as she massaged me. I lay there feeling better, her touch so nice and her voice so soothing.

‘Who would do such a thing to someone so pretty and young?’ She asked, again.

‘My mother, she had me tied and beaten, that’s why I had to come west, to get away.’

‘That’s awful, what kind of mother would do such a thing? Never mind, don’t answer that. How are you now, is the ointment helping?’

‘Yes, yes, it is, thank you Martha.’

‘Let’s get you dressed, I have some bandages in my bag we can put on, it will help stop your clothes from rubbing too much.’

She helped me stand and I noticed she was still naked too, her body slim and hard, typical of a woman who had worked hard all her life, and her breasts were still very firm. You wouldn’t know she had two kids, she looked so good, I couldn’t help but stare.

She saw me looking but didn’t try and hide herself, she was obviously comfortable with her body, as was I.

‘You’re beautiful, Martha.’ I gasped, blushing when I realised what I said.

She smiled and turned to her bag, showing me her shapely bum as she bent down, my eyes still on her. She caught me looking again, making me blush even more as she turned me around.

‘Why was you staring at me like that, am I the first woman you’ve seen naked?’ She asked, gently putting on the bandages.

‘No ... i ... just ... sorry, I didn’t mean to stare but ... you’re lovely, sorry... ‘

‘It’s ok,’ she said, laughing a little as she interrupted me. ‘I’m not used to looks like that, it was nice, Hank used to look at me like that but now, well, you know... ‘

Now it was my turn to interrupt: ‘He’s so lucky to have you, you are beautiful, any man would want you.’

‘And woman?’ She asked, laughing again.

Her words took me by surprise, I wasn’t expecting her to ask that. Did she really want to know? I wondered.

‘Yes.’ I suddenly answered, not really thinking first.

‘Is that what got you this whipping?’ She asked, her voice all soft.

‘In a way, I got this because I told someone about my mother coming to my room and making love to me, she didn’t like that.’

Martha gasped, before saying: ‘My daddy did the same when I was young, it happens a lot, I think.’

‘But I liked it, it was wonderful, even though it was my own mother I let her. How sick am I?’ I asked, not wanting her to answer.

‘Hey, she was your mother, it was all her doing not yours.’

She was right, I suppose. Martha carried on with the bandaging, both of us quiet now.

‘So you think I’m pretty, huh?’ She suddenly giggled, lightening the mood.

‘I think I said beautiful.’ Giggling too.

‘Well, the bandages are on so you can turn around and have another look if you want.’ Her voice a little husky now.

I turned and looked, blushing again, not knowing what to do now. Martha smiled and begun taking her clothes out of her bag, making sure I could still see her as she held them up.

I went to my bag and got out a shirt, a soft cotton one, watching her closely as I put it on. She was watching me, too, we both watched the other dress, enjoying the other’s gaze. We were both flirting, deliberately flaunting our bodies for the other’s pleasure, it was so sexy and made me feel a lot better. When we were dressed, we both burst out laughing. Martha came to me and held me, her breasts squashing against mine, I wanted to kiss her but was too scared.

‘You look really nice in trousers and that shirt, so pretty.’ She told me, touching my face gently with her fingers.

I pushed my face into her fingers, liking her touch, my eyes on hers, telling her to kiss me. She wanted to, I could tell, I was good at reading women now.

‘Oh Mary, you are so pretty, can I kiss you?’ She asked, blushing herself now.

I didn’t answer, I just leaned in and pressed my lips against her, taking her by surprise. She pressed back, opening her mouth and letting my tongue in, gasping as I played with hers. It was the first time she had kissed a woman, that was clear and her gasp probably meant it was the first time a tongue had entered her mouth.

We kissed passionately, both eager to taste the other, my hands on her bum, pulling her into me. I really wanted her, I was feeling so bad all day and now this beautiful woman was kissing me, it was wonderful. She suddenly pulled away, her face all red with arousal and her eyes wild with passion but she was scared, I could see that, too. This was her first time doing anything like this and she didn’t know how to deal with it.

‘Let’s go, Hank will be waiting.’ She said, but not moving.

‘Yes, we should, you’re right.’ I answered, not moving either.

‘We can’t do anything, not here, can we?’ She asked, her expression one of willingness.

‘That would be dangerous, we could get caught.’

‘Yes, what would we do anyway?’

I was going to tell her when there was a knock at the door. ‘Hurry up, you two.’ Hank shouted.

I grabbed her and kissed her, holding her tightly before saying: ‘Thank you, you are so lovely and kind, can we be friends, I need a friend?’

She hugged me back, promising we would be great friends. We left the room and joined the others, Jed staring at me in my trousers, telling me I looked like a man. I laughed and sat with him, feeling really good now and looking forward to getting to Clear Water.

To say the overland trip was a nightmare would be a complete understatement, it was nearly as bad as having daddy fuck me. How people endured this I did not know; the dust and bumps were enough to send a person insane. If it wasn’t for Martha holding my hand and hugging me every ten minutes, I would have gotten off and walked back to Chicago.

Jed found it all so amusing, telling me I needed to toughen up if I was to make it in the west. I promised him a D minus for his first piece of school work.

We arrived late afternoon, just in time to see the sheriff shoot a man dead just in front of us. Apparently, he was a well-known cattle thief who drew on the sheriff rather than face a trial. ‘Welcome to Clear Water,’ Hank said.

Looking around as I waited for my luggage to be unloaded, a little shiver ran down my back, I had finally arrived in the west and just as uncle Jed had told me, it was wild. The man lying face down in the dirt, blood oozing from his body, a testament to this. Martha took my hand and squeezed it, trying to reassure me, not realising I was more excited than scared. I squeezed her back, letting her know how much I appreciated her.

The town had a long straight main street with wooden buildings either side, many of them painted in a variety of colours, red being most popular. Each side had a raised wooden walkway which kept people out of the dirt, thankfully. I could see at least three saloons but there was probably more and even at this early hour, music could be easily be heard.

I needed to find Reverend Smith, he had the keys to the school house and was the man responsible for my appointment. Martha offered to help me, she knew how strange this all was to me and seemed to want to spend more time with me, something I was very grateful for.

Hank was more interested in going to the blacksmith and getting his wagon and horses so they could all get back to their farm.

‘Hank, I think I should stay here with Mary until she gets herself sorted out. The poor girl has all this luggage and still hasn’t seen where she will be sleeping and we need to find the Reverend.’

Hank didn’t look too keen on that idea but I was. ‘Oh yes, what a wonderful idea. Please Hank, let Martha help me, please.’ I begged, trying to sound as pathetic as possible.

‘How will you get home?’ He asked, sounding agreeable to the idea.

‘I’ll get Marvin from the store to take me.’ She told him.

‘Well ok but don’t be too late.’

‘Thank you, thank you, Hank.’ I gushed, hugging him.

Jed demanded a hug, too. Saying he agreed as well so he deserved one. I laughed and hugged him, even giving him a kiss, something Hank junior also demanded. Both now blushing as they left with their dad to get the wagon.

‘That was sweet of you but I think Jed has a thing for you, you better watch out.’ Martha teased.

‘He’s a fine-looking boy, maybe I will marry him in a few years and I hear his mother is very beautiful.’ I teased back.

‘Let’s find the Reverend and get you settled at the school house.’ She replied, blushing a little.

‘Thank you for this, I’m so grateful, you are the best.’ I told her, hugging her and kissing her cheek.

She hugged me back, kissing me as well, her body pressing against mine, making me feel warm all over. We left my luggage with the hotel and set off in search of the Reverend, our first stop the church. It wasn’t far, on the edge of town, about half a mile. The town was pretty small, one main street with a few more either side of it. There was a big general store, a clothing store and what looked like a butcher but not one you would recognise in Chicago. Martha told me the blacksmith was the other end of town with a few more bars and a cattle association building with a lawyer’s office next to it.

Martha knew everyone we passed and introduced me as the new teacher, much to everyone’s delight, all of them inviting me to dinner once I was settled.

‘I think you will be very popular young lady.’ Martha said, poking me.

‘Well, I’m nice, I can’t help that.’ I replied, poking her back.

When we got to the church, he wasn’t there but a lady named Betty, who was cleaning for him, told us he was probably in the saloon, the ‘Silver Spur’.

Martha didn’t look surprised by this news, she just raised her eyes and turned, pulling me with her.

‘Bloody typical, he’s always at that place, pretending to save the girls. He must think we are all idiots. Come on, he’s the only one with the keys to the school.’

I let her pull me along, she was strong and I could tell she was angry. When we were out of earshot of the cleaner, I pulled her hand, to stop her, I wanted to ask a question.

‘Is he a drunk, Martha? You don’t have to hide anything.’

She sighed and nodded her head. ‘He likes the drink but he is a decent man, most of the time. We’re gonna have to find him and get those keys. Come on, I’ll look after you.’

I felt safe with her, she was a very capable woman, it was obvious and I was happy to let her guide me.

‘Where’s the school?’ I asked, thinking it would be a good idea to know.

Martha pointed beyond the church, saying: ‘About half a mile that way, just beyond those trees. You can see our place from there as well, we can wave to each other.’

‘Really! I can see your farm?’

‘Yeah, as long as it’s not raining.’

‘We’re gonna be neighbours, I’m so happy.’

She suddenly pulled me to the side of a building, looking around to see if anyone was near us. When she was sure there wasn’t, she pinned me to the wall and kissed me, passionately. I was shocked but liked it, her lips felt so good as they pressed hard against mine. She then stopped and pulled me again, saying nothing as we made our way along the boardwalk.

‘Well, that was nice, thank you.’ I said, giggling as she pulled me along.

We soon reached the saloon, Martha turning to me and telling me to wait here.

‘No, absolutely not, I’m coming in with you.’

‘It’s no place for a young girl like you, trust me.’

I put on my serious face and repeated what I just said.

‘Ok, I can see you are a stubborn girl but stay by my side. I know the man who owns this place, he’s ok but he doesn’t like anyone interfering with his customers, especially if it’s to stop them whoring and drinking.’

I nodded and followed her, so excited to be going into my very first saloon. The smell of cigars and men was almost overpowering, I breathed in deeply, loving it. It was noisy and there was men and women everywhere. Some playing cards, some dancing and singing and others just drinking at the bar. The women were all dressed in provocative attire, their breasts hanging out and their legs nicely on display, just as I imagined they would be.

I couldn’t help but stare, it was an amazing place, so full of life and merriment, with wonderful looking characters. Martha still had my hand, pulling me further in to the place.

‘Over there, I can see him.’ She shouted.

I let her pull me, noticing all the men looking at us, wondering who we were. Before we could get to where we were going a big man in a suit stepped in front us.

‘Martha, how are you? Have you left that husband of your and come to work for me? And look, you’ve brought me a gift, what’s her name?’

He was very handsome and clearly a man of means, his suit made of the finest material, just like my dad’s. Martha smiled sweetly at him, obviously knowing him.

‘Very funny, Ben but no, we are here to get some keys off of the Reverend. This is Mary and she’s the new teacher.’

‘That’s a pity, you would earn a fortune here and so would Mary. Two beautiful women like you are wasted anywhere else. Mary, if you ever need extra money come and see me.’

I blushed at the thought of working here, knowing exactly what work he meant. I didn’t answer him I let Martha do the talking.

‘She won’t. We’ll be gone in a minute, just let us get the keys, Ben.’

‘Of course, but leave him here.’ His tone very serious.

‘We only want the keys, he can do what he wants.’

Martha pulled me away quickly, taking us to a table with a man and two girls sitting at it. The man was in his forties and obviously drunk. The two girls were either side of him with his arms around them both. He was swaying and talking, both the girls laughing and touching him, playing him like a violin.

‘Reverend, this is Mary the new teacher. We need the keys to the school house.’ Martha shouted, hoping he would respond.

‘Martha’, he slurred, smiling up at us. ‘What are you doing here? Sit, join us, I’m trying to convince these two sinners to repent and come to church.’

The two girls laughed loudly, both kissing his cheeks.

‘We need the keys, just the keys and we’ll go.’ She repeated.

The Reverend stood up, both girls having to help him as he swayed and laughed. ‘I’m gonna take these two upstairs and show them the error of their ways. Wait here for me.’

They all pushed past us and headed for the stairs.

‘Reverend, we need the fucking keys. Just give us the keys.’ Martha shouted, trying to grab him.

He ignored her and started climbing the stairs, his hands all over the two girls as they disappeared. Martha didn’t follow, probably not allowed or scared to go that far.

‘Fuck fuck fuck, he’s gonna be hours now.’ She cried, sitting down at the table.

I sat next to her, looking out at all the people in the saloon, still excited about being in such a place despite my predicament. Martha looked at me and took my hand, she was concerned about me and it was nice but I was so engrossed with this place that I couldn’t worry that much.

She then poked me, hard in the ribs, scowling at me. ‘I thought you was as worried as me but look at you, all excited about being in a saloon. What am I going to do with you?’

‘I’m sorry, don’t be mad at me. It’s just all so new and different and exciting, I can’t help it, but you’re right, I should be worried, sorry.’

She smiled and put her hand on my thigh, squeezing gently to let me know it was ok. A man then put two drinks down on the table.

‘From the boss, on the house. He said you might be here a while.’

‘Can you ask him to come over please?’

‘Sure.’ He answered, going back to the bar.

Ben came over a couple of minutes later, looking just as good as last time, smiling down at us.

‘How can I be of assistance, ladies?’

‘You know where he is and I can’t go up there, is there any chance you might send a man up there to get us the keys, please?’ She asked, very sweetly.

Ben chuckled and called someone over. A young man appearing a few seconds later. He told him what to do and sat down with us while the man ran up the stairs.

‘How’s the farm, Martha?

‘It’s fine. Thanks for this Ben, we do appreciate your help, we know you have a business to run and we’re a nuisance, sorry.’

‘It’s ok, really. We’re old friends and I help my friends, especially when they’re so pretty.’

Martha blushed a little, squirming in her chair. These two had a history, it was obvious and Martha was embarrassed about it. I would definitely be asking her all about this handsome devil.

I took a sip of my drink and coughed loudly, nearly spitting it out, much to Martha’s and Ben’s amusement.

‘Oh, poor girl, have you never had whiskey before? Martha asked, wiping my chin.

‘No.’ I answered, still coughing.

‘Try again, it gets better.’

I did and it didn’t. ‘Yuk, that is awful. Don’t you have any tea?’

Before anyone could answer the young man was back, looking disappointed.

‘Sorry Mr Young, he has no key on him. We all looked and could find nothing and he’s passed out now and we can’t wake him. Gloria says he’ll be out for hours, he always does this.’

‘Fuck, now what? You can’t stay at mine we only have two rooms, unless you don’t mind the barn?’

I thought she was joking but she wasn’t. ‘The barn? With animals, real animals?’

Ben laughed at my stupid question, Martha joining him, both now laughing.

‘Ok, I know it was a silly question but I’m a city girl.’ I told them, trying to justify it.

‘Listen, you can stay here if you want, we have some nice rooms in the back and no one will bother you, I promise.’ Ben offered, winking at Martha.

‘Ben, stop it. She’s only eighteen and a school teacher.’ Martha quickly replied.

Ben chuckled and puffed on his cigar, looking at me with those gorgeous blue eyes, making me hot all over. ‘Seriously, she can stay here, she’ll be fine. Hey, you can stay with her, the room has a double bed.’

‘Yes, stay with me Martha, I’ll feel much better with you here.’ I gasped, taking her arm.

I could see a spark in her eye, she liked that idea, we both did. After what happened earlier, I really wanted her to stay, I wanted to have sex with her and i know she felt the same.

‘I can’t, what would Hank say? I want to but he wouldn’t understand.’

‘Please Martha, I need you. You’re my only friend here.’ I begged, leaning against her.

‘You can take my horse, go home and explain to him she needs you and come back, he’ll understand.’ Ben told her, calling the young man back again.

‘What about my luggage? It’s at the hotel. Oh, why don’t I stay there?’ I suddenly thought.

‘Well, you could, if they have a room free and you can afford it. It’s very expensive.’ Ben told me.

He was right, I didn’t have much money and I needed to feed myself for the first month. ‘You’re right, I would be very grateful for a room. I could do some cleaning or something similar to pay for it.

‘Can you sing?’ He asked, cheekily.

‘Actually I can, I’m very good but I’m not sure your customers would appreciate the songs I know, they are very tame.’

‘Mary, shhhh, he’ll have you on that stage in a second.’ Martha sighed, poking me.

‘We have a pianist and some song sheets; you could sing those. If they like you I might even give you some cash. What do you say?’

‘I forbid it, absolutely not. Now leave her be while I ride to mine and talk to Hank. I’ll be back in an hour or so.’

‘Mother!’ I chuckled, kissing her cheek.

The young man was told to fetch Ben’s horse and bring it to the front. Martha went with him, hugging me and telling me to behave while she was gone. I sat back down and waited for the dinner Ben had ordered for me. I took another sip of my whiskey, hoping it might taste better, surprised when it did.

By the time my dinner was brought to me I had finished the whiskey with another arriving once I had eaten. Ben returned soon after that and handed me a song sheet along with yet another whiskey, smiling mischievously.

I recognised a few of the songs; yellow rose of Texas and Clementine, I had even sung them before.

‘You wanna give it a go? I’ll be here if you want to run off stage, no one will bother you, they know better in here.’

He was serious, he really wanted me to sing for his customers. I had sung in front of people before, mainly at church but never anywhere like this. My tummy was all fluttery but I felt excited, brave even.

‘Ok, I’ll do it but if they shout at me or are horrible, I’ll stop.’

I couldn’t believe I had agreed, what on earth was I thinking. Ben went off smiling, leaving me with my whiskey, which I soon finished. Then I heard him shouting, he was on the stage.

‘Gentlemen, I have a surprise for you. Tonight, we have the lovely Mary who has agreed to sing us a few songs. Now she’s very young and hasn’t sung in such a grand place such as this before, so be kind to her, or I’ll fucking shoot you, now give her a cowboy welcome.’

Everyone was shouting and clapping and raising their glasses. Ben came to me and took my hand, leading me to the stage. His hand was so big and strong I just followed like a little puppy. There was a man sitting by the piano playing a tune, waiting for me.