Chapter 6: 1968-1969

Periodically prisoners were transferred to other blocks for different reasons, usually overcrowding. It had happened twice since I’d been incarcerated. This was gonna to be the third time, and I was part of it; there would be three of us.

“The good news? I was going to have a cell mate. The bad news was that I would also be more vulnerable to trouble since the two-inmate cells were in a unit, C-block, where there was more freedom of movement.

Me and a big guy, a really big guy, named Lutz would be roomies, for how long was a question. Could be a few days, could be forever. Lutz got the bottom bunk.

“Name’s Benedict,” I said. “Please don’t kill me.” I didn’t smile.

“Lutz,” said the big guy; he snickered. “You’re safe so long as you don’t give me no shit.”

“Okay,” I said, ‘no shit’, got it.” I figured I’d soon be pressed into servicing him, but well, I guess I’d be seeing.

We were getting four hours a day outside of our cells here in C-block, counting meals. That compared to the less than two hours a day in a cage in B-block where us max inmates could exercise or talk or—be abused. At any rate, so far, I was glad for the switch.

Yeah the switch was turning out to be a plus, but my nights! My nights were still nights of bitterness and pain and burning hatred. The loneliness and thoughts of my wife’s betrayal controlled me. I didn’t talk much to anybody, not even my cellmate. He wasn’t much of a talker anyway; well, so far, so it didn’t matter.

It was less than a month after she visited and dumped me that I got the divorce papers. I didn’t even look at them. I just trashed them. I couldn’t do anything about it anyway. They could fuck themselves raw as far as I was concerned. I had to smile at the thought; that’s probably what they were doing—nightly.

During free time, I just mostly sat in my cell or, if I went outside, I just walked slowly around the fifty-yard track in the kennel; that’s what I called it. It was a giant outdoor cage, like the one in B-block where us in max could exercise. But inside or out, all I ever did was think about the hopelessness of my situation.

Almost two decades to go before I could for sure get out. Parole was possible before that, but rumor had it, that with the political climate the way it was, my chances didn’t look good; no one’s did. Fuck!

My ex wrote me a couple of letters soon after she dumped me, But I trashed them without even looking at them. Then I did what I should have done immediately after her visit: I took her off my approved visitors and mail list.

I did wonder if she ever thought of me while he was banging her. I had to think that she did. Someday, if there were a god, she’d be truly sorry for dumping me; well, that was the hope. Probably a vain hope but a hope, nonetheless.

She sat across from him while he talked on the phone to the lawyer.

“Yes, Mister Golding, if you could see your way clear. Yes, today would be good,” said Herbert. The call went on for a few more minutes: directions were given and lunch at castle Cooper promised.

“He’ll be here by noon,” said Herb. Valerie nodded.

“You really think he’ll be willing to help us?” she said.

“He and I talked briefly last month, as you know; he knows what we’re about. So yes, I’m positive he will. I mean you heard,” he said. “We’re not asking him to do anything illegal. That he will be keeping his relationship to the company on the QT is not relative to Chase’s situation, so we’re proof against anything coming back to bite us in the ass.”

“Okay, good,” she said. “I better give Cassandra a heads up. Noon is just two hours off.” Her fiancée nodded.

“Lunch was truly something,” said Will Golding.

“Glad you enjoyed it,” said Valerie, “Cassandra is an artist.” The visitor smiled.

“So, are we on the same wavelength? I mean as relates to Chase,” said Herbert. The lawyer sighed.

“Yes, I can’t see any downside to going forward with helping him.”

“Good, good. William, there is no doubt whatsoever that Chase hates us for falling in love, and well ... there is no doubt that he would reject any overt help from us. But we do want to help Chase to the extent possible even so. So, if you will remain his lawyer for the duration, I mean the duration of his sentence, the company will pick up your expenses and keep you on retainer, as we discussed, for unrelated future cases in your field that may come our way or yours. Good enough?”

“Yes, yes, more than good enough. And I will continue to keep Chase’s rights and interests protected.”

“Excellent,” said Herbert. Valerie raised her hand like a sixth grader needing to powder her nose.

“Mister Golding, please let me know how Chase is doing from time to time. I mean, well, the real story, no soft pedaled nonsense. Obviously, I have kind of a special interest regarding him; and well, I am desperate to do what I can to make up for the pain I’ve caused him. I mean quite apart from the legal side of things. Please.”

“Yes, ma’am, I will do as you ask.”

The mini meeting continued for a short time longer and then the principals returned to their individual schedules.

It was the first of May. It’d been but a month and a half, since my wife had dumped me and crushed my heart that I got me a visit from my lawyer.

Lawyer Golding had visited me a few times since I was sent up, and he had sent along a couple of notes as well. He was seated across from me now in the usual private, no guard required, conference room we’d used before.

I still had my cast on. It was scheduled to be removed the first of next week. I couldn’t wait.

“How yuh doin’, Chase?” he said.

“Better, I mean you know,” I said. “My facial fractures and the swelling are heeling and fading, and I lose the cast the first of next week—fucking finally! Supposed to have been weeks ago.” He half smiled.

“Yes, I can imagine it’s been a problem,” he said. I nodded.

“Yeah, it has.”

“I know you’ve been transferred of course. I was in on that. You got it partly because of the beatdown. But also because of the usual, overcrowding.”

“Yeah, I heard about it: the overcrowding part. But you had a hand in it too?”

“Yes, well, the assistant warden’s a kinda pal. I was able to get you on the list. You okay with your cellmate. I mean you are in a tandem cell now.”

“Yes, and C-block is a sight better,” I said. “So, it’s all good. I guess it’s gonna be good. A little more yard time too.”

“Twice as much. And I did vet the inmate you’re paired with. Like I say, I know the assistant.”

“Hmm, well that’s worked out. Lutz is an okay guy; well, so far he is,” I said.

“I saw from the log that you had a visit from your wife recently,” he said. He sounded a little—something—asking the question like he did. I knew that lawyers always checked the log when they visited, but his tone was somehow kinda—something. “But she was late in coming. Right?”

Okay, he sounded a bit off because he’d noticed the shortness of the visit.

“Yeah, she dumped me. She’s divorcing me. Tired of being married to a killer, I guess,” I said.

“That’s a true bummer. I know it happens to a lot of guys in here, but, well...”