Once again I sit here at the Village Inn drinking coffee, pad of paper on the table in front of me, Pilot G-2 pen in hand and wondering what kind of story to write. Unfortunately my mind is a total blank. Start young? Teenage? Married and settled? Single and looking? Work related? What the hell Robert; just do what you always do - start and let it come to you.

My name is Paul Camelot and I’m thirty years old and I had always considered myself a nice guy. Or at least I thought I was. Now? No so much. Actually now I think I’m an asshole. Why the sudden change? A woman of course. Not just a woman, but one hell of a woman. Five foot six, green eyes and red hair hanging down to the middle of her back and a body that came in at 36-22-36. If Helen of Troy’s face launched a thousand ships then Angel’s face would have caused ten thousand to put to sea.

Angelina, Angel for short, was the wife of Thomas Deerfield who was my main rival at ZYX Corporation. We started on the same day and it seemed like from day one we were both always going for the same promotions. I scored first when I got the assistant manager position in Quality Control. Soon after he became assistant manager of Purchasing. When the manager’s position in Shipping and Receiving came open we both went for it and Tom got it. A year later I got the manager’s position in Quality Control.

I knew his wife Angel from all of the company’s social functions and to say I lusted after her would be an understatement. I honestly believe that any man who even got a glimpse of her on her worst day would want her. But want or not Angel did not appear to play around and I wasn’t one to mess with another man’s woman anyway.

Then came the day I was in the right place at the right time. I’d gone to lunch with one of our suppliers at Red Lobster and after we ate we went our separate ways. The Red Lobster was right across the street from the Red Roof Inn and I was looking that way as I walked to my car and I saw Angelina Deerfield get out of a car with Amos Billings and walk toward one of the rooms. I took out my phone and recorded them going into room 117. I moved my car to where I could keep a close watch on the room (and get closer to get better video) and settled in to wait. When the two of them emerged two hours later I was even lucky enough to catch them kissing.

As they pulled out of the parking lot I was reviewing what I had on my phone. What I had was dynamite. Billings was vice-president of Operations at ZYX and the man who would be making the decision on who got the regional manager’s position that both Tom and I were going for. From what I’d just seen it appeared that Tom was going to be the new regional because I couldn’t offer Billings anything that could top Angel. I wondered what it was about the position that Tom would be willing to offer up Angel to get it. One thing I did know was that my hands off policy where Angel was concerned went into the trash can.

I decided to strike while the iron was hot so to speak. I knew that Angel worked from home doing billing for several doctors, dentists and small local businesses. On the off chance she went home from the Inn I called her home number.

“Hello?”

“Good afternoon Angel. Paul Camelot here. How are you this lovely afternoon?”

“I’m fine Paul, but Tom isn’t here yet.”

“I don’t want to talk to Paul. I’m more interested in talking to you. Any chance you could get loose and have dinner with me tonight?”

“Are you out of your mind? What in God’s name gave you the idea that you could call me and ask me that?”

“I don’t know if God had a hand in it, but if it wasn’t him it was fate that put me where I could see you and Amos Billings go into room 117 of the Red Roof Inn.”

“Are you on drugs? I’ve never been to a Red Roof Inn in my life!”

“Well while I’m talking to you I’m watching the video I shot with my phone and I’m willing to bet everything I have that it is you kissing Amos after coming out of room 117. But I do admit I’ve made a mistake or three in my life. I guess I’ll need to get a second opinion. You wouldn’t happen to have Billings’ home phone number would you? His wife doesn’t work and she should be home. I’ll get her opinion on whether or not it is Amos in the video. Never mind. I’m sure it is in the phone book. Sorry to have bothered you. Have a nice day” but before I could hang up I heard:

“Wait! What do you want?”

“I already told you. Dinner tonight.”

“What time and where?”

“How about the dining room at the Hilton at six?”

“All right.”

“See you there.”

I was smiling as I put down the phone. I wouldn’t get the regional manager’s job, but I was pretty sure I’d get Angel and of the two I was pretty sure I would enjoy Angel more that I would enjoy being a regional manager.

I walked into the dining room at the Hilton at five to six and found Angel already sitting there. As I joined her I said “I hope I didn’t keep you waiting for long.”

“I just got here.”

Just then the waitress showed up and took our drink order and when she left Angel asked “Now what is this all about?”

She wanted to go right at it so I did. Simple really. You fucked Billings to get Tom the regional manager’s job which means you fucked me out of it. I decided I needed a consolation prize. That would be you.”

“You can’t be serious!”

“Oh but I am. You know what you’ve got Angel and you know that every man who has ever glanced your way ended up with lustful thoughts about you. Just like them I have had lustful thoughts about you since the first time I laid eyes on you, buy I’m a nice guy, or I was, so I buried those thoughts. That has all changed. You fucked Amos which meant that you fucked me out of a job I wanted. I figure it is only fair that since you fucked me out of a job you should fuck me to make up for it.”

“You really are a piece of shit! What if I tell you to fuck off and die?”

“I go to the director of Human Relations, show him the video and claim I’m being cheated out of a fair shot at the promotion. I’m guessing the outcome will be Tom losing his job and Amos will be fired or demoted. It wouldn’t have bothered me if Tom had gotten the job fair and square, but to try and steal it using you just doesn’t set well with me.”

“Tom doesn’t know. I did it on my own.”

“You love him that much? You would go that far for your man?”

“Not hardly. I did it for me not Tom.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Alimony is based on the spouse’s wage. Tom gets the promotion and the raise that goes with it. As soon as he is in the job I’m filing for divorce. I’ve finally had it with his cheating on me.”

“He cheats on you? That doesn’t even make sense. If you were mine I’d chain you to the bed so you could never get away. Where in the hell would he even find something better that what he already has?”

The waitress came with our drinks and asked us if we were ready to order and Angel said “Why bother? Just get a room so we can get this over with.”

“I’ll have the sirloin, medium well, mashed potatoes and the glazed carrots.”

Angel gave me a look of disgust and then said “I’ll have the same.”

Once the waitress was gone Angel asked “What the hell are you doing? Why didn’t we just get a room and get this shit over with?”

“Did I not ask you to have dinner with me? We are having dinner.”

“Why? We both know what you really got me here or. Why the stall?”

“We both know what I had in mind when I sat down but things change. Now what I want is to sit her and drink in your beauty while cursing myself for not being the asshole I really wanted to be.”

“You aren’t making sense.”

“I know, but for a little while I can sit here and have you all to myself.”

“Still makes no sense to me. Fucking on a full stomach isn’t all that great.”

“Well, if it won’t be fun I guess I’ll have to take a pass on it.”

“You aren’t making a whole lot of sense here.”

“I know. One of my biggest faults. I’m told the Baked Alaska here is to die for.”

“Will you please tell me just what in the hell you are doing?”

“I told you. I’m sitting alone with you and drinking in your beauty and cursing myself for not being the asshole I wanted to be.”

“Look: I barely got out of high school Paul and I don’t have even an hour of college so you think maybe you can tell me in simple English just what is going on here?”

“Okay; straight up. I came here meaning to blackmail you into having sex with me. I thought Tom was using you to get the promotion and I decided you both were fucking me out of the promotion I’d fuck you behind Tom’s back as payback. Then I find out that Tom had nothing to do with it so I can’t be the asshole I was going to be.”

“But I still screwed you out of the promotion.”

“You have to understand that Tom and I have been rivals since the day we hired in at ZYX. As long as it was between me and Tom I could justify in my mind going after payback. It was just between us. Now I know he isn’t guilty so I have no reason to seek payback. Understand?”

“Kind of, but I’m here and I was going to do what you wanted. I was pissed at you for the way you set it up. I was pissed at myself for having to give into you. Now you are going to pass on it? All of a sudden my ego is screaming “How can that asshole walk away from this” and she indicated herself.

“I know and I’ll probably cry myself to sleep tonight for letting the chance of having you go. Sometimes it just sucks to be me.”

Our meals came then and we ate in silence. I asked her if she would like to try the Baked Alaska for dessert and she said no. I paid the bill and walked her to her car. I opened the door for her and said “Good night Mrs. Might Have Been” and she surprised me. She took my head in both of her hands and laid a kiss on me that left me weak in the knees. Then she got in her car and drove off.

I expected that to be the end of it, but of course it wasn’t. Two days later I was called into Billings’ office. He told me to have a seat.

“I received a phone call yesterday and was told I might have a potential problem with you.”

“I take it the call came from a lady named Angelina?

“It did.”

“I thought I’d put her mind to rest.”

“You did, but it was me she thought who might have a problem.”

“Not so. I can’t fault you for doing something that I would probably have done were I in your shoes. If something that nice came up to me I would probably bent over backwards to give her what she wanted.”

“She is something. No way on God’s green earth I could have said no to what she wanted given what he offered.”

“Rest easy. I’ve already destroyed the video.”

“I guess you should know that Deerfield was going to get the job anyway and that decision was made before Angelina came to see me. I guess I should be ashamed of taking advantage of her. Quite frankly you would have been wasted in that job. I gave it to Deerfield because I’m saving you for something else. Mattson is retiring in two months and I have already penciled you in as his replacement. That’s a secret by the way so let’s keep it just between us. Okay?”

“You got it.”

Tom got the promotion and six weeks later I was promoted into Mattson’s position.

Right about now you are asking yourself “What’s wrong with this guy? Thirty years old and single? Obviously he isn’t gay, at least you wouldn’t think so given the way he lusts after Angelina Deerfield. Well the sad truth is that while I like the ladies I don’t trust them. My distrust had its roots in high school.

I dated Brenda Stuart for three months before asking her to go steady with me. She said yes and two months later she dumped me for the football team’s quarterback. Next up was Linda Lewis. She dumped me for a guy whose father had just given him a Mustang convertible. Next on the hit parade was Helen Catron. We went steady for almost six months and I thought we were solid. Her eighteenth birthday was the day after mine and also was the day of the senior prom. We followed the unspoken tradition of exchanging cherries. A month later she was on the arm of the guy who up until then had been my best friend.

College was no different. Carol Meiss and Rachel Wallace in my freshman year. Marsha Loomis and Brianna Spencer in my sophomore year and Roberta Davis in my junior year. All dumped me for someone else or cheated on me with someone else and got caught.

The one who hurt the most was Elizabeth Martin. We met on the first day of our senior year and we clicked. It was like a bolt of lightning hit us and we both realized we were meant for each other. We were going steady by the second week of classes and were engaged to be married when spring break rolled around. Liz went to Panama City with some girlfriends, but I had to stay home because of some family commitments.

The week before graduation Liz came up to me and told me she was pregnant so naturally I told her we had to hurry up and get the wedding out of the way. Then she told me I wasn’t the father. I turned and walked away and never spoke to her again.

By the time I left college with my degree in hand I no longer trusted the female of the species. My sexual needs were taken care of by two young ladies who worked for an escort service. Given my background it was easy for me to be the asshole I was going to be with Angelina Deerfield.

Six months after that night I was still cursing myself for not following through on what I planned on doing. Not only that but it was costing me money. Having come so close to having Angel had me on a sexual high and I saw my two escort ladies more often.

A little over seven months had passed since I moved into Mattson’s job. It was around four-thirty on a Thursday when my secretary buzzed me on the intercom and told me there was a Miss Parker there to see me.

“She’s not on the appointment calendar, but she says it is important that she see you.”

“Send her in.”

The door opened and Angelina Deerfield walked in and closed the door behind her. I rose to greet her and said “Miss Parker?”

“I took my maiden name back when I divorced Tom.”

I pointed to a chair and said “Have a seat. Wanda tells me that you feel it important that you speak with me.”

“Well maybe not important to you, but it is to me.”

“Care to explain?”

“The last time we met you told me that I knew what I had and that every man who saw me wanted me.”

“I remember.”

“Well I sampled quite a few of those men before I married Tom and all of them turned out to be assholes. I thought I’d found a winner in Tom, but he was cheating on me before our second anniversary. I don’t know why I put up with it for as long as I did, but I finally got tired of it and decided to divorce him. That’s where you came in. You spoke your piece and I thought “Oh great! Another asshole to add to my long list of assholes. But then you threw me for a loop. You had me. I was ready to give you what you wanted, but all of a sudden you wouldn’t take it. Said it wouldn’t be right.

“I was shocked! There wasn’t a man I knew who would have walked away from me under those circumstances, but you did. A man with principals. Something I never knew existed. I remember you saying if I was yours you would chain me to the bed so I could never get away.”

“I recall all of that.”

“Did you mean it?”

“Of course I did.”

“Well I’m not quite ready to be chained to a bed, but I think I’d like to get to know a man like that a little better. Since your aren’t married and I’m no longer married I’m here to find out if there is any interest on your part in seeing if we could get to know each other better.”

The woman was so damned sexy looking that as I sat there listening to her I had one hell of a stiffie and by the time she got to the “Any interest on your part” I was ready to do her on my desk, but of course I didn’t. I did however say:

“I would very much like to get to know you better. Since you have taken the bull by the horns, so to speak, in coming her I assume you already have a first step in mind?”

“As a matter of fact I do. The company I’m now working for is having a banquet tomorrow night and I need an escort.”

“That’s tomorrow. What are you doing tonight?”

“I have no plans.”

“How about we have dinner, drinks and talk?”

“I’d like that. What time?”

I looked at my watch and said “It is quitting time for me so how about now?”

“Fine by me.”

“We can take my car and come back for yours after.”

“No need for that. I came here in an Uber.”

On the way to the restaurant we talked and I found out that while she had a car she rarely drove it.

“Parking sucks in the area of my job and there is a bus stop just down the street from me and a bus stop just outside of work so I use the bus mostly. Coming to see you today was spur of the moment so I called a Uber.”

Over dinner and drinks I learned she was an only child, had graduated for Metro State College with a degree in Business Management. I reminded her she had told me she didn’t have a day of college and told her I was shocked just shocked to find out she lied to me. She laughed and said I’d get over it. She had been married twice (Tom was her second) and had no kids.

“Maybe someday, but right now they would be too inconvenient where my life is concerned.”

Since the next day was a work day for both of us I had here home by eight and she gave me a kiss on the cheek. Not anything close to the steamer she gave me the last time we were together, but hopefully it was a sign of better things to come.

It turned out that the banquet was actually a combination farewell party for a guy who was retiring and a promotion party for his replacement. I knew of her company and I knew several people who worked there. About an hour after we got there one of them caught me in the men’s room.