Chapter 44: (Re)Connecting

January 14, 1981

The phone rang in the early evening. “Hey, Steve!”

“Hi, Mel. Everyone signed, so it’s official. Everyone welcome regardless of team and everyone pledges to not say anything to anyone for any reason.”

“It still makes us nervous, but ... we’re in. Sunday. Look, this is a really good thing. It’s just ... you know. The stakes.”

“I get it. Look, Mel? If anyone in the group were to blab, I promise that the rest of us would flat-out say they’re lying. I’d go as far with that as I needed to, including claiming being a boyfriend.”

She sniffled a bit. “That’s ... I believe you. I trust you. I ... thanks, Steve.”

“We’re going to give you as much cover as we possibly can.”

“This is ... it’s really good. It’s special. Also ... I checked. Andy’s in if we are, which, we are. Just him, no ... friend. Not yet. He needs ... cover ... even more than we do. I tried, but, again, what, go off the guest house and pretend? We tried it, but then we’d have to act all lovey-dovey. I could do that at a dance, no problem. But with friends? Friends who’d see through it? It got so he just couldn’t take it.”

“If he finds someone, hey, what’s weird about a couple guys joining a study group?”

“That’s going to mean a lot, Steve. Just. Fuck. Just being accepted.” She paused a little. “And, I mean, I know it was just an accident. But thank you for getting my head right about Janet.”

“Just luck.”

“Yeah. God. I thought I had her figured out. Throwing herself at guys, when she had Lizzie. It made me so damn mad. I should’ve ... I mean ... Lizzie would never put up with that. But she comes off as such a fucking airhead. I thought maybe Lizzie just wanted her body or whatever. She’s the nicest person, Steve. I apologized, and she just said, ‘Like, ohmigawd, you totally bought it! Radical! Means I still, like, got it!’”

I chuckled. “Sounds just like her.”

“See you Sunday, Steve. Well, I mean, I’ll see you at school. But ... you know what I mean.”

“I do. See you then, Mel.”

January 14, 1981

Cammie leaned over during Debate. “How’d you figure it out? We try really hard to keep it hidden. I need to know if we’re idiots and people can just tell.”

I shook my head. “I was shopping at the mall and saw you come out of a store. I figured I’d go say hi. Before I could even get moving, you caught up with Mel. And Andy, who I’d thought was on the outs with Mel. You know, kinda the blind date gone wrong thing? They were having a great time. Then Mel took your hand and brushed your hair back and the light went off. If I hadn’t had a lot of context, I’d have figured it was just girls being girls.”

Cammie sighed and smiled. “That’s a relief. I just. Um ... they’re really religious. My parents. It would go over like a lead balloon. I’d be sent somewhere where they try to ‘fix’ you, pretty sure. Maybe just grounded for life, but I think ... exile.”

“Gah! Like people need ‘fixing’. Sorry, I know you must love them, except for that, but...”

“Uh huh. This is ... Mel told me a lot of things. I’m blown away that you did all this.”

I shrugged. “Mel is good people. Really good people. Everything I know about you says you’re really good people. I want more good people in the group.”

She sighed. “I’m glad we’re becoming friends.”

“Me, too, Cammie.”

Mel turned up to study group along with Cammie. Both of them looked a little unsure. All the hugs helped with that. No one making a big deal over them beyond welcoming them helped, too.

Angie pulled out the rules and went over them. Mel signed right away, then Cammie followed. Once that was done, Cammie said, “OK, as the new girl ... um ... Mel’s been following the rules, I guess, so I know I’m missing something.”

I took it. It seemed to be my role. “Normally I’d have talked to you first, but then, I do that every day now.” A bunch more laughter. I pointed to the picture window. “See the pool house over there? It comes with a very nice guest room that people often visit for an hour or so, for a nap. And we’ve observed that, almost always, people who are in a relationship seem to enjoy napping together.”

Cammie blushed and giggled. “Oh! Oh my! Well, that explains that!” She hesitated. “So, you’re good with, um, us...”

“We’re good with you. Who cares? Love is love.”

“Can I ask about those naptime rules?”

“Sure. Ang?”

She smiled. “We draw straws at the start of each ... um ... cycle. Short straw goes first and so forth. Up to now, the girls have drawn; it makes sense to just have each couple designate someone. You can always pass — either not draw, or pass when it’s your turn. Swapping times is fine. We’re really good about trading. If you know one night is good, and another isn’t, just mention it; someone will swap. And of course, like I said, it’s a ‘nap’. It could be a polite conversation, it could be sleeping. Or maybe not? No one knows except the people involved and who they tell. Also, part of the ‘respect for each other’ rule is to remember your sex ed, or, if you don’t, study it. Another part is to clean up after yourself. There’s a washing machine; there are towels. Buy some sheets, use air freshener. Be polite.”

“That’s cool.” Cammie smiled. “OK, so, I agree. I’m happy to sign.”

Angie passed the sheet around and we all signed. If someone really blew up, it wouldn’t be worth the paper they printed it on, but at least now we had something to point to.

Early in the meeting, Cammie and Mel just sat close, working together on some homework. By the end they looked like most of the rest of us, the ones with girlfriends or boyfriends. Holding hands, flirting a bit.

Mel came over towards the end. “Hey, Steve.”

“Hey, Mel. It’s great to see you. It’s been a while, with the holidays and all.”

“And my ditching out.”

“I wouldn’t have said that.”

“Yeah, well, I am.” She sighed, sat down next to me. Then surprised me by snuggling right up against me. “I’m so sorry about Candice. I mean, whatever happened, it’s gotta suck for you.”

“It does. I think about her every day. Often. How she’s doing, if she’s OK. Stuff like that.”

“What happened?”

“Can’t say. Even if she never knew I’d said it, it’d hurt her, in a way. It’s deeply personal.”

Mel nodded, reached around and hugged me. “Damn. I’m so sorry.”

“Mel? Thanks for coming back.”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

She gave me another squeeze, then hopped up, went over, and smooched her girlfriend. They really were cute together.

10:30pm

My pink angel stretched out and rubbed noses with me. “Hey, big bro.”

“Hey, little sis.”

“Mel and Cammie are adorable. Thanks for getting them in the group.”

“They’re a cute couple, aren’t they? Cammie is a ton of help in debate, too.”

Angie sighed. “Young love. How did you figure it out?”

I related the little encounter at the mall. Angie was skeptical until I mentioned Mel’s previous encounters with Janet.

“What’s Janet got to do with it?”

“Janet’s debate partner is Lizzie Vinton.”

“Lizzie the Lezzie!” Angie’s eyes got a little wider.

“Yeah. One of the most ‘out’ people at school. She embraces ‘Lizzie’, knowing what people do with the name. She’s not trying to be Beth or Elizabeth or whatever. Anyway, debaters are good at respecting our own. Which is why I think Janet feels safe holding hands with Lizzie in class.”

“I ... wow. Well, there you go. Wait! Oh, my god!”

“What?”

“That’s what freaked Mel out!”

“Huh?” I was missing it. I knew I should see it.

“Janet Collins! Her whole freak-out! She thought Janet was picking up guys! And Janet’s with Lizzie! She thought Janet was cheating. I mean, cheating constantly.”

I slapped my forehead. “Damn, you’re right. I missed that. That’s why she felt so bad about it. She must have gotten pissed, and either said something or treated Janet badly. Or Lizzie. Or both. Wow.”

“You took a real risk on this, bro. You could’ve easily been without an Extemp tutor.”

“True. But now I’m with an ‘out’ Extemp tutor.”

She growled again. “You are too good at that! Why did I let you sign up for a class that’s all about words?”

“Because you love me.”

“You have a point.”

“Sleep well, sis.”

“Sleep well, big brother.”

The wiggle was a bit more pointed this time. But even with the wiggle ... no. My heart was far too raw for even fourteen-year-old hormones to take over.

January 20, 1981

Study group was great. Mel and Cammie dragged Andy back. Like them, he started off looking nervous, but when the girls hugged him and the guys shook his hand or clapped him on the back and asked how he’d been and made it clear we’d missed him, he got into the swing of things. No one said it out loud, of course, but he knew everyone knew. And that no one cared in the least.

Acceptance is a powerful thing for people who feel like they’re on the verge of being outcasts. Being different in who you love is a big reason for that. But so is being a different ethnicity. Or religion. Or being the fat kid. The shy kid. The nerd. Poor. Neglected. Unloved.

Some people in study group had led charmed lives. But even in the most charmed, everyone had a few clouds. A hint of worry.

Together, we were a clan. A family of choice. We could weather stresses.

Which is good, because there are always stresses, even in the closest of families.