Chapter 1

The date was January 1st 2000. It was the morning after all computers were supposed to crash. They didn’t. Since our new police chief believed that the patrol car was the real reason people obeyed the law, I had been assigned a stupid task. According to him it was the halo effect which made people obey the traffic laws. When people saw the police car they automatically became little angels. So, more cars on the road would result in lower crime. Maybe penny ante crime did fall, but serious crime became a higher percentage of all crimes.

Since it was New Years Day, I sat in the sector patrol car alone close to a high traffic intersection waiting for a call. I was working traffic on New Year day, because I had a recent civilian complaint. I probably deserved it, since I was caught on tape telling a black man to “Drop that gun, or I will blow your black ass away.”

I was back after a thirty day suspension for unprofessional conduct. That suspension joined my three commendation in last ten years. I explained to the board of inquiry that, “I simply made sure there would be no misunderstanding as to what I meant. After all I wouldn’t want his death on my conscience for not making myself clear. The community action committee just didn’t accept that answer. The ghetto residents could talk their trash to me, using the same works, but it was a major sin if I returned the same words at them.

What happened next I never was exactly sure. A sky blue van drove into the middle of the intersection where I was staked out. I was in a parking lot on one of the corners. It took me two days to remember any of what happened next. The van levitated for a split second then it disintegrated in a fire ball. That was all I ever remembered about the incident.

I’m not sure if the fireball reached me or not, but the shock wave sure as hell did. It turned my patrol car over, or so I was told later by witnesses. I didn’t hear the metallic rain storm descend on my new Ford cruiser. According to the fire department report, the windows in my cruiser disappeared and I lost consciousness.

The next thing I remember I was laying in the dark. My arms were tied to the bed and my eyes were at least covered. Okay I wasn’t that rational at the time, so I went back to sleep.

The world was still black when I heard a female voice. I recognized it, but it had been a long time since my wife had spoken to me in a pleasant voice. “I must be dead, since Marsha is speaking to me in a calm voice,” I whispered.

“Sarcastic as ever Merl,” her voice suggested.

“So how you feeling Merl​​?” a male voice asked.

“I don’t know. So who are you?” I asked weakly.

“I’m one of your doctors,” he voice replied.

“Then how about untying my hands so I can scratch my nose. I get it that I’m all fucked up,” I admitted.

“That’s a pretty good description,” Another female voice suggested.

I felt hands working on my hands. Pretty soon I had my hands free. “I won’t remember, but what all is wrong with me?” I asked.

“Pretty much half the bones in your body were compromised. Your jaw was broken, so you are going to be on baby food for a few weeks. Most of your injuries are crush injuries from supporting the patrol car with your body. Of course before it rolled over on you all the glass blew out and did a number on your face. Mostly the damage was to your left eye. It was compromised, but we think we can fix it. So do you want to know how?”

I shook my head. I knew that I wouldn’t understand anyway. “So I assume I’ll be helpless for a while,” I said.

“Yes, for a while. We need to make sure everything works before we discharge you,” the doctor said.

“So tell me Doc, do I look like an early Frankenstein experiment?” I asked.

“Maybe a little,” he said seriously.

“Okay, I’m tired now and I’m beginning to feel uncomfortable,” I said before he shot me with something in my IV port.

The nurses woke me a couple of times a day for the next few days. I was awake for only a few minutes at a time. Just time for me to realize that I wasn’t dead. Soft ice cream was the high point of those days. It took over two weeks for me to be released from the hospital to a rehab clinic. Since I had no living family I spent a lot of time alone. The clinic did have a small TV in every room, so I was able to at least hear the fake TV lives of other people. It might have kept be sane, or drove me to the edge.

The clinic personnel taught me how to walk even though I couldn’t see. I was transferred back to the hospital after a month of physical rehabilitation. It was on Valentines day that I checked into the hospital. Since I was back in the town where I had worked, people who knew me before visited the night before the surgery. The sergeants had mentioned it during roll call, so I got visitors. I hated that it was a treat, but I did resent that no one had come to visit me during the last six weeks.

I was still wallowing in the world of ‘poor me’ for sure. I didn’t even feel guilty when the therapist came by the room and offered to meet with me. I told her no thank you. It was my desire to feel depressed for a while longer. I couldn’t get to a pistol, so nothing was going to happen to me, I assured her.

It was early on a Monday morning when I was told that I qualified for the transplant. The one that would restore vision in my left eye. The doctors were hopeful, but refused to guarantee anything.

“It went fine Merl, with a little luck you should be able to see in the next few days,” the doctor said.