Unintended Consequences

by Banadin

Tags: Ma/Fa, Humor,

Desc: Humor Story: The unintended consequences of taking reader advice by a new author.

It started out with me writing a story. It was more for something to do, rather than ever be published. I was recently retired and wanted something to keep my mind active yet not that demanding. I had an idea that I thought would make a good story, but knew I didn't have the skills to write commercially so typed it out on my computer intending family only distribution.

I shared it with my eldest son; he suggested I post it on an online site. The story could be read for others for free and I might get some feedback. Though he did suggest I convert to Times New Roman font. I thanked him for his suggestions and made the font change. I didn't even mind the implied criticism.

I posted the story, it was a little out of place because the site specializes in erotica, but they allowed about anything legal to be posted.

It was up for less than eight hours and I started getting emails. Most were complimentary but several with some sincere criticism. I went back and did a thorough spell and punctuation check, and fixed some run on sentences, also paragraphs were too long. One person pointed out that I was being unrealistic on how long I was having my character hit a golf ball, the story was a fantasy but hey he was right about it being unrealistic, and he had brought it up politely so no reason not to make a change. After making those corrections I reposted the story awaiting further comments and hoping for a few compliments.

There were some attaboys and requests to keep writing, but another reader pointed out that my story would go better if it was a girl protagonist rather than a male, so Robert became Roberta and I reposted.

This was followed by a deluge of emails. I had forgotten to do a search and replace for; he, him, and his. I said a few choice words but made the corrections and reposted.

Again a few good comments but one really good thought. Golf though played by women is more of a man's game; I should have her play tennis instead. I thought about that and it seemed like a good idea so I rewrote the game, of course I now had to describe some tennis matches and delete the rounds of golf. After reposting I kicked the trash can in my office; that was frustrating work.

The next set of emails gleefully pointed out that I had neglected to change the locations where my story was taking place. Maybe I should change Augusta for Forest Lawn. Oh and yes Taylor Made is not in the tennis racket business, maybe I want to change that. Those changes obviously needed to be made so I did and reposted. I really didn't mean to knock the lamp off my desk and break it when I threw the trash can.

.... There is more of this story ...

The source of this story is Storiesonline

For the rest of this story you need to be logged in: Log In or Register for a Free account

Story tagged with:
Ma/Fa / Humor /