Clitoris, Genitals, Glans, Hymen, Labia, Mammary Glands, Penis, Phallus, Pubis mons, Scrotum, Testicles, Vagina, Vulva, Womb.
We were sitting at the kitchen table with our biology books open to the full color, translucent pages in the middle of the book that showed the human body in stages from the skeleton to skin. It was the last few weeks of our Advanced Biology class and we were studying the human reproductive system. We’d gone through the human body from Epidermal to Skeletal and were finally into something interesting. Reproduction, Procreation, Sex, Humping, Banging, Getting it On, Screwing, Fucking, Doing It.
My sister was reading the terms from the vocabulary while I scouted through the pages looking for the definitions. She would repeat the word then after I found the right description in the book we studied the colored images to identify that particular item of the body. Both Male and Female were represented with little arrows and notes describing and defining the body part illustrated. We’d spent the better part of Saturday afternoon doing our homework and even though we were looking at and talking about the most intimate parts and acts, there was absolutely no arousal factor, I just wanted to escape.
My sister is more than three years behind me in age but since she’s so scary smart she is taking advanced classes in school; that’s how we ended up doing the same homework. Regal is in two of my classes so sometimes we study Shakespeare together too. Now that’s really fucking boring and if it weren’t for my kid sister I’d be failing him with a double fucking F.
Regal, the brainy little geek girl, her IQ is about a billion. She already has a full scholarship to State University just because of her mind. Her name is Regal which mom thought was cool because it means royalty or something. Mostly I thought it meant she was a royal pain.
Sis says her name makes her sound geeky, but if you look up Geek in a dictionary you’ll see her picture. Not only does she have a geek name, she looked the part with thick framed, brown flecked tortoise shell glasses and mousy colored hair done up in two tight braids. Being a fifteen year old straight A+ senior who carries her books in the crook of her arm instead of a backpack didn’t downplay the nerd image either. She didn’t wear anything except dull colored, formless over-sized dresses almost to her ankles. She looked as if she bought from old lady thrift shops. My friends all kidded me about how my sister is some kind of brainiac, like MegaMind or something, I was kind of embarrassed of her sometimes. Regal says I have smarts too but if being smart or using them meant I had to look and act like her then I’d rather duck that responsibility thank you.
We were done with definitions so I closed the book, making ready to enjoy the rest of the afternoon with my skateboard and friends when Regal leaned back on her chair and looked at me with probing eyes, “Can I ask you something?” she began.
“You see boys in the gym showers after the games; do you guys all look like those pictures? I mean all people are made up the same way; do we all look the same?”
“Huh, what are you getting at? I guess we all have the same parts but you can see the differences, some people are skinny, fat, or totally buff. There are good looking people and some really dirt bag lookers. Some boys are hung, some not so much and lot of girls have big boobs while others have little ones. Of course we all look different.”
Regal came back at me “True, we all have the same physical make up but there are differences. I mean, take womens’ breasts; I know there are different sizes but do the nipples all look the same? Maybe some are fatter or longer or poke out in different ways and directions. Or a man’s penis. Are they all the same size? Does every man in the world have a six inch phallus?” My sister locked her brown eyes on mine “Have you seen a girls breasts?”
“Tits, Regal, in my language they are called tits, boobs, a rack, jugs, knockers, ta tas, or chest pillows. Breasts are what gorillas beat on.”
“What about the penis?”
“That can be a prick, cock, pecker, schlong, rod, wanker or be a name like Dick, Peter, Willie or Johnson.”
My sister flushed slightly red, “Where do you pick up vocabulary like that? I never hear that stuff.”
I stood up to leave, “You gotta have friends that talk like that, some that don’t have their noses stuck in a book twenty-four seven. Those three friends of yours are some of the weirdest kids on this planet and everybody I know thinks you’re weird too. Too much brain, not enough reality. Let’s face it Regal, if you want to learn about life, you won’t learn it from a book, you gotta get something stuffed up your twat.”
My sister was used to me riding her about being smart so she didn’t flinch, “Twat? I know that one and it will be a long time before I let some guy stuff a schlong into my twat.”
“You’d better make that a boner; a schlong would be too limp.”
The house geek ended the conversation by correcting me, “Flaccid, not limp.”
We tested on Monday and I scraped up a B while my sister topped the charts as usual. The rest of the week in Biology was spent on Reproduction which was fun because the guys in class were ragging on the girls constantly for examples and practice, the teacher was barely able to control the testosterone. The storm of innuendo and suggestions in the room inundated my young sister but failed to faze her. She studied and took copious notes while the rest of us whistled, cheered and flirted with the more brassy girls.
Copulation, Ejaculation, Fertilization, Gametes, Intercourse, Penetration, Procreation, Spermatozoa, Zygote; the list went on. That chapter in the book was very explicit in scientific terms, with full color images of sperm and egg reproduction. When we were done with the definitions Regal flipped the pages back to the picture that showed a cut away view of an erection inside a vagina with a cloud of semen around the end of it. It was like the pair having sex was split down the middle, kind of like a cut away view of an engine or something to see how the insides work. “That looks almost erotic except it would hurt be cut in half like that” mentioned my sister. I was thinking only a total nerd would find a science book erotic. She looked up at me, “You never answered my question last week, have you ever seen a woman’s breasts?”
She caught me off guard. I hesitated because I don’t normally talk about private stuff with my sister but I knew she was looking for knowledge, not gossip “Yeah, I’ve kinda played around with some girls that way.”
She didn’t ask who, but “What do they feel like, can you feel the lactic glands inside?”
“Glands no, I was feeling the nipples, those are the turn on, I didn’t want lunch, I was trying to get laid.”
“Did I what?”
“Did you copulate; get laid as you say in your gutter vernacular?”
“The word is ‘fuck’ Regal. Did I get fucked? Bugs copulate, maybe birds copulate but people fuck. When a guy sticks his hard-on into a girl they are bumping uglies. You just gotta get out of the library sometimes and join the real world. And yes, I’ve fucked some girls, seven of them in fact. Screwed, hammered, boffed, jumped and bounced. I don’t copulate, that doesn’t sound very fun.”
“Say it.” I demanded.
She cocked her head “Say what?”
“Say Fuck, Fucking, Fucked, Fucker, Fucks. Say them all, I want to hear you say something ghetto.”
Regal stood up as if to leave and faced me full frontal, “Kiss my ass; why don’t you go slurp up some cocksuckers cum from a fat assed bitch’s hard fucked cunt?” She smiled sweetly, big brown eyes twinkled happily behind the heavy framed glasses “Is that ghetto enough?” then she swept from the room surrounded by an air of satisfaction. I was stupefied.
The next weekend we were studying for our final tests in High School. The Graduate Dance was just hours away but my sister insisted on keeping up the ritual of two hours of homework every Saturday. I wanted to start gearing up for my date but Regal was adamant. “You will not graduate if you cannot interpret Shakespeare.”
“And I won’t get screwed if I don’t go to the dance with Marcie.”
Regal put her pencil down “What makes you think she will mate with you?”
“It’s the last Prom. It’s tradition. It’s natural, it’s expected. We dance, make out, then get it on in a car or even a bed if we’re lucky.”
“If it is tradition, how do you think the poor fathers of the girls feel, sending their virginal daughters into the night with bastards and fornicators?”
“Don’t you know Sis; every father in the world knows what goes on after the dance but each one of them holds on to the belief that his daughter is one of the few pure girls in the school. None of them want to believe their girl fucks like a bunny when she can.” I continued “There are only three fathers I know who can be sure their girls are behaving themselves.”
“Who?” asked Regal.
“Ours and your really weird friends’.”
.... There is more of this story ...