My cellphone rang. Generic ring this time. I have specific ringtones for most people I know. This wasn't one of them.
"This is Sam. Can I help you?"
The voice that answered was immediately recognizable, but wasn't one I'd heard recently. "Maybe you can."
Kayla. Niece of ex-wife. A blue-eyed brunette carrying fifty pounds more than those 'ideal weight' charts, a sharp mind and a sharper tongue, because she'd spent her life fending off those 'fat girl' comments. She was a college graduate, working in the medical field, on her own, and from every report I'd heard, which were few and far between, she was doing quite well.
"How'd you get my number?"
"Your ex. My aunt. Everybody has it. All I did was ask."
"Oooo-kay then. What's up?"
"I have to ask you something."
"Okay. I don't have to answer, but you can still ask."
She sighed as if she was trying to fortify herself, then took a breath. "How safe are you?"
"Safe? As in what? Nobody's trying to kill me, at least not since your aunt remarried."
"Safe. As in are you screwing lots of women, live-in girlfriend, somebody who has a claim on you. That kind of safe."
I was thinking 'strange question'. Well, she's not standing here in front of me, so answering won't cost me anything. "Safe. NO girlfriends. NO 'screwing', as you so delicately put it. Nobody has a claim on me. Why?"
"Me neither. I have a proposal."
"I'm listening." And wondering what the hell she was up to.
"You don't, like, find me totally disgusting, do you?"
"Uh, not totally. Why?"
"Well, I mean that last time you came over for the kids at our family Christmas party, you grabbed my ass."
I did. There's this switch in my head that flips when I see a young, rounded ass in jeans. That fifty pounds I mentioned before? Part of it was bent on turning out a fine, rounded ass. Everybody was in a good mood. I'd had a couple of glasses of wine. So had Kayla. She's squeezed by me, headed somewhere and my hand, acting almost on its own, just reached over and did a quick trace of a curvy cheek, then squeezed.
She wheeled around. As she turned, I thought I was getting ready to get slapped, but instead the blue eyes were twinkling and her hand grabbed the front of my trousers and squeezed down on a semi-erection. She stuck her tongue out through a smile and returned to her original path.
"I seem to remember that. I seem to remember a retaliation, too," I reminded her.
"Yeah. Exactly. Look, Sam. You know me. I don't get drunk or do drugs. I'm responsible. Right?"
"So I've heard. A little crazy."
"You may bump that 'crazy' number up some. I'm proposing a partnership."
"A partnership. As in work?"
"Definitely not work. How about companionship?"
"Me. You. A nice, neat, sane companionship thing."
"A companionship thing? What does that entail?"
"Occasional dinner and a movie. Lots of overnight stays."
"Okay. You're recording this and you want to see how much you can get to embarrass the shit out of me."
"Actually, no I'm NOT recording, and I'm parked on the side of the street looking at your house right now."
"And if I say 'no'?"
"Then I drive off. Sad. But I drive off. But I hope you'll say yes."
"Why me? I would imagine you could get any of a few dozen guys your age to buy into this."
"And I'd have to put up with the 'big pickup truck' shitkickers or the 'backwards cap' gamers or the 'latest fad' hipsters. I know you. You might have been boring to my aunt, but I kinda think you're safe."
I had a thousand thoughts spinning in a vortex in my head, but one of them made its way to the speech center of my mind and I said, "Come on in. Let's talk."
Three minutes and she knocked on the door. I let her in.
"I was gonna throw my arms around your neck and kiss you," she said, "but you said 'Let's talk.'. That's not the same as 'yes'."
She was still wearing a set of teal blue hospital scrubs. That plain monochrome cotton let her body tell its own tale. I'm looking. Damned right I'm looking, and I'm thinking of a Rubens painting. And thinking that Rubens guy has a good idea. The brown hair was short, sensible, low maintenance, clean, shiny. And the eyes were still blue like an autumn sky, and they looked a little apprehensive.
"Kay," I said, "I'm not into gratuitous sex."
"This is NOT gratuitous. This is me and you, in a mutually understood relationship."
"Open ended. As in not 'til death us do part'. That's sort of what got me married to your aunt. She wanted a few rolls in the hay. I wanted ... talked her into it. Thought she could make the change. Apparently the change didn't include me."
She looked sad. "I know the story. I know it really well. Details. Mom and your ex talk a lot. I overhead some of those conversations."
"Yeah," she said. She deepened her voice to imitate the ex. "He wants to spend the whole afternoon in bed, fooling around. He doesn't think he can go to sleep unless I let him get some. He likes to get sucked. It'll be a cold day in Hell before I let him shoot off in my mouth. He doesn't wanna fuck unless he eats me first."
"Gee. Some of that sounds familiar," I admitted. "I didn't realize I was a dud in the sack until her."
Those blue eyes fixed on me. "I don't think it sounds like a dud to me. After the Christmas party, I like to used up a set of batteries in my vibrator. You grabbed my butt and all I could think of was 'the whole afternoon in bed.' I saw your eyes. You didn't grab me by accident."
"No, it wasn't an accident," I admitted. "You're certainly attractive to me."
She twisted on the sofa, tucking one leg underneath her, leaning forward. The move emphasized the bulge of her bosom. Happily, she's not one of those fat women with the KK cups. Kay's ... Oh, shit! Now I'm imagining what her tits look like. And that imagination, well, good think I'm sitting down. I can move a leg and hide the change in my groin.
Dammit! She saw me move my leg. She ... the corners of her mouth turned up just a tiny bit.
"Look, Sammy," she said. She used 'Sammy' because she knew it aggravated me. "You. Me. I don't do anybody but you. You don't do anybody but me. You can hang out at my place, or I can hang out at yours. You own your stuff and I own my stuff. Like friends..." Her eyes sparkled. "With benefits."
"I hate that term."
"I know you do. But I just explained the parameters within which we operate. Some people would say that this is..." And damned if the thing didn't launch herself into my lap and kiss me.
Okay, I may have some high moral intentions but hey! I'm human. MALE human – the very WORST kind. And I like kissing. So I kissed back. I'd kissed Kayla before, the little kiss for a little girl from her uncle. Make no mistake – this wasn't one of those. Nor was the next one. And the one after that. And when it broke, all I could do was bury my face into the junction between her neck and shoulder and breathe in deeply the alluring whiff of perfume.
"So, you LIKE kissing," she said. "Not only that, you're GOOD at it."
"Mmmmmmm so are you," I said.
"Still need some time to think?" she asked as she repositioned herself on my lap.
"Think? What's this 'think' of which you speak," I questioned. She was close enough. Another kiss. I remember how much I loved kissing.
I also loved the feel of soft, very female flesh under that cotton fabric. I let my hands roam. I touched her sides, feeling the softness there. No, I couldn't feel ribs. Who wants to feel ribs, anyhow? And I received not the least negative indication when my hands ranged down her back to that sumptuous ass.
It's hard to complain when you're kissing. We stopped. I looked into her face. Kept my hands on her ass. Kneaded. Got a smile. And more kissing. Stopped long enough for her to rearrange herself. Instead of sitting sideways in my lap, now she was straddling me.
"That's pretty hard, isn't it," she said. She sort of ground down, pushing her soft pubic mound onto my erection. You'd think that between her clothes and my clothes, we'd be safe. I was way past safe.
"Do I need to ask the question again," she asked softly between kisses.
"I'm being horrible distracted."
"You're not the only one." Kiss.
"How many nights a week?"
"All of 'em. If I have something else to do, I tell you. If you have something to do, you tell me. Otherwise, you and me."
Another kiss. "We'll have to see how well we can sleep together in the same bed. Is that okay with you?"
"Does that mean yes?" Her head was bowed. Her yes turned up to see me. Expectant.
Squeal! Kiss. Wiggle.
I was about to come in my pants.
"If you touch me I'm gonna go off like a Roman candle, Sam."
"I know the feeling, Kay."
"You like oral sex. I know. I heard your ex, remember?"
"I do. Do you?"
She nodded vigorously. "Our first time. I'll do you and you do me?"
"I need to do you first," I warned. "The way that thing's acting, this orgasm may be my last conscious moment on the planet."
Giggle. "I hope you don' t mind juice. I get REALLY juicy. Turned one guy off."
"I don't think there IS such a thing as too juicy, Kay. Shall we find out?"
She got up and I stood with her. This time when we were standing in front of one another, I needed a kiss.
In the bedroom, she started to undress. "No, let me do that," I told her.
.... There is more of this story ...