Anne N. Mouse: Blog

I'm not particularly afraid of talking to crowds. But dealing with individual people sends me into a panic attack. I've listened to and made sure to erase the only two recordings of my voice that I'm aware of because I don't like my speaking voice. So I have a strange hesitance to attempt a podcast. Not that I'm well enough organized to do any sort of podcast. Conveying information in a coherent fashion obviously isn't my strong suite. And now it has been more than five years since I have posted any fiction because I don't want to do anything that isn't perfect... Nor do I want to start posting anything that I don't consider properly finished. And the weakest part of my writing is endings... Yet it is something I don't even know how to practice.

So I passed a story to a compatriot here and he kindly gave me some very good pointers.
Thus what is the problem?
I feel like the story struggles to even be two dimensional.
Maybe I'm too self-crirical? IDK? But I'm definitely having morecthan second thoughts about letting another badly constructed abd finished story out there.
Then there are my five or six horrifyingly flat, not frightening attempts to write a horror story.
How can wordsvseem compelling in my mind, but fall flat when I write them down?

I'm really trying to think of what would be a reasonable goal in overcoming at least one of my paranoias... Because, as I've often stated here, I dont have just one noid I have vast herds of noid. So, I'm doing my best to have what I will consider a complete short novel (60,000 words approximately) and put it on book appy and premium here...

Bleah! I had to wait 'til I was where I could access my lappy to edit this, because my phone loves to autocorrect everything I write... And if I don't watch carefully I can end up posting, or publishing outright nonsense.

To ask for a prereader or two for a possible Halloween contest story?

I don't understand patron. Not that I am nearly consistent enough in my output to have subscribers.

I don't trust PayPal. Or I suppose any other money transfer company. All of this (not counting the fact that I don't write regularly) makes working online pretty much a no go.

They don't have to be out to get you if your paranoia prevents you from moving... I know. Yet remain fixed in place.