Chapter 8

"Are you ready, Paulie!"

"I guess so!"

"You don't sound very sure!"

"I'm not! Are you?"

"Of course! You know I've wanted one for ages and now I'm old enough ... but if you don't want to come with me..."

Whether the sad look on her face was genuine or not, it didn't matter: she knew he hated to see it and would agree to virtually any­thing rather than have to.

Penny took his hand in hers; something else he didn't seem comfortable with anymore, so it was more like a limp handshake than a gesture of affection.

"What's wrong, Paulie? We've been holding hands since we were five, and now you don't want to." They knew each other so well, they were now acutely attuned to each other's emotional states.

" ... Is it Jimmy Roberts? You've been acting strangely ever since we started going out. Why don't you like him, he seems to like you!"

"There's nothing wrong, Pen, but we're getting older, things just change. You won't expect me to hold your hand when you're thirty, married, and with a couple of kids." She smiled.

"I would if my husband's gone off with some tart he'd met at work, or somewhere!"

"But what about my wife? She wouldn't like me holding hands with another woman." Penny just gripped his hand tighter and laughed.

" ... Then you'd better not get married, had you!"

It was the sort of silly conversation they always had ... and it was one of the reasons why he loved her. He probably had loved her ever since the day she'd moved in next door with her parents and older brother. It was no longer the mental agony of the crush that he'd had on her for so long: it was just the profound love that you feel for someone, just because they are around. But he knew, too, that they were no longer children; that any day, and in so many possible ways, something could, and probably would, change the nature of their relationship, fundamentally.

Take Jimmy Roberts, for example. Penny had met him at a party several weeks ago. She'd always flirted with other boys, but this time they clicked and they had been seeing each other regularly ever since. It was one of the very few things that Penny hadn't told him anything about, but Paul was pretty sure that they had slept together. He wasn't jealous; he wasn't her boyfriend and if it was what she wanted and it made her happy, he was glad. But he knew that it was possibly the first step of a journey with an inevitable outcome. In his own, inexperienced, clumsy way, he was trying to make a tactical withdrawal and put some necessary emotional distance between them. Paul knew it was something that he had to do: but there still seemed to this umbilical bungee cord between them, so that every time he backed away, it seemed to just pull her towards him again.

"Here we are!" she said, after they'd got off the bus and walked for several minutes. "You really do have to come in and hold my hand, Paulie!" She was right, he had to: although by rights, it probably should be Jimmy there instead of him.

"Hi! I came in the other day. I have an appointment at two, with Big John," Penny said.

"Did you decide which one you want, Love?" a young woman asked her. Penny took a piece of folded paper out of her pocket that Big John had given her of the tattoo she'd chosen.

"Nice!" the woman said, "Your first one?" Penny nodded.

" ... And maybe my only one!"

"Yeah, we all say that! But then we keep coming back for more!"

Penny was quite strong-willed, and once she'd made up her mind to do something, she rarely changed her mind. She was also up for new challenges and new experiences, and it had recently occurred to her that, having decided to get a tattoo done, she might like to get a piercing done at the same time.

"Do you mind if I ask you a personal question, she said to Big John's receptionist. "Do you have any piercings, I was thinking about getting one today as well."

"I have, where were you thinking about having one?"

"Well ... my clitoris, actually!"

"Oh, that's an easy one!" the young woman said, "And John did mine!"

"Er, I know it's going to hurt," Penny said, " ... but any tips!"

"Not really, Love! But don't be embarrassed if you feel like fainting or throwing up; big, strong men often do, too!"

" ... And I don't think I can do it unless my friend comes in with me and holds my hand, is that all right?" The young woman looked at the tall, good looking, eighteen year old male with Penny.

"I should think so! But if he changes his mind, he can always stay out here and hold my hand!"

Big John came out of his cubicle at the back of the shop, taking off his disposable latex gloves, like a surgeon after an operation. Despite having almost all of his exposed skin covered in coloured inks, he was not at all intimidating by nature.

"We've got a fainter, Sharon! Can you go and sit with him until he's ready to get up." He acknowledged Penny. "Hello, Love! You came back then! Sorry, but it'll be after two now, I'm afraid! Do you and your boyfriend want to go for a walk for half an hour?"

"All right!" Penny said, "Come on ... boyfriend!"

As soon as they were out of the tattoo parlour, Penny's hand found Paul's again. Habit, probably.

"That was a bit of an anti-climax, wasn't it! Buy me an ice cream, Paulie. And I should probably have a pee before we go back!" He bought two ice creams, and they found a bench to sit on, in the sunshine.

" ... Out of interest," Paul said, " ... why isn't Jimmy here with you?"

"Well, in the first place, I wanted you here with me, not him ... and in the second, I doubt if I could get him away from his beloved, bloody football!

" ... You know ... I think that woman in the tattoo place fancies you, Paulie! I bet she's got some interesting piercings, too! She'd probably show you if you asked her."

"I don't mind tattoos and piercings ... I don't want any, though ... but I think some people go to extremes. Have you seen the pictures of that guy in America, who's had extreme body modification and tattoos, so he looks like a cat! I think that's going too far!" Paul said.

As he would be in the tattoo parlour as long as Penny was, he went to the loo as well while she was in the ladies.

Penny climbed up onto Big John's couch. It was a hot, sunny day, so she was wearing a short, lightweight sun dress, which she unselfconsciously hoisted up past her waist, so that, apart from a tiny pair of knickers, she was bare from navel to ankles. Paulie sat on a chair next to the couch, resting his arm as he clasped Penny's hand.

She had chosen quite a pretty tattoo: a flower and butterfly design, which wasn't that large ... maybe not even the size of Penny's clenched hand ... but was quite intricate and employed four colours with subtle shading. During the process Penny never entirely got used to the needles, but it did get easier to bear. She didn't faint, like the previous customer, but she was quite pale by the end! After the protective dressing was put on, she was told how to look after it until it 'healed'.

"Do you still want the piercing, Love?" Big John asked her.

" ... Well ... I've come this far!"

She calmly took off her knickers and handed them to Paul. Big John raised the back of the couch, so that Penny could see what was going on. It was a very odd sensation: letting a man she hardly knew have access to such an intimate part of her body; but Penny was more interested in what was about to happen, than being embarrassed!

She flinched as the large piercing tool was inserted, but the whole thing took only a few minutes to complete.

"They tend to heal quite quickly," Big John said, "but to avoid infection, it's recommended that you don't wear underwear for a few days, to keep the area cool ... and of course, no sex with your boyfriend until it's fully healed! And if there's any prolonged soreness or signs of infection, get along to your doctor right away."

Penny stood up and pulled her short dress down and smoothed the creases with her hands. Going commando was no problem ... it actually felt quite nice ... and so as long as she was discreet, there would be no problems. So after handing over quite a lot of money, she and Paul walked out into the warm afternoon sunshine again.

"Come on!" Paul said, "I'll buy you a coffee!"

"What did the tattoo look like, Paulie; I couldn't really see while he was doing it."

"Well, you can't really tell until it settles down; but if it's as good as the picture, I think it'll look very pretty. And was it worth it?"

"At the moment, no ... but like you say, once it's settled down, I'm sure I'll forget it hurt so much."

They bought two coffees to go, then sat on the same bench where they'd had their ice cream earlier. They didn't talk much, but Penny sat with her head resting on Paul's shoulder.

"Are you out tonight, Paulie?"

"No, I don't think so. You?"

"Mmm. I'm supposed to go to Cassie's party, but I'm not sure that I'm up to it at the moment, but I might be later. Want to come ... Cassie likes you, she won't mind!"

"No thanks, maybe next time! Right ... ready for home?"

"A bit longer, eh! It's early yet," Penny said.

Paul was having breakfast in the kitchen the next morning, when Penny called in to see him.

"Tea, coffee, or juice?" he asked. "Up early, or just got home?"

"Orange juice, please! And I've just got home," she said, looking at him sheepishly.

"How is it this morning ... still sore?"

"A little, but not bad! What did you do last night?"

"Oh, not much! Did you go to Cassie's after all?"

"Mmm. She asked after you ... I think she really likes you! She isn't seeing anyone, why don't you ask her out; I'm sure she wants to!"

"There's not much point, is there, Pen. There's A-levels and then uni somewhere. I don't want to get involved with anyone. And Cassie's pretty, I'm sure she gets lots of offers."

"I forgot about uni: where are you applying to?"

"I'm not sure yet, there's still a few weeks to decide. I may even leave it a year ... try to work and save some money. How about you?"

"Same. I don't think you should go unless you really know what you want to do at the end of it. My mum and dad are keen, but they never went themselves, but they said it's my decision. Do you still want to do computing?"

"Yes, if I do anything, it'll be that, I suppose."

"Do you want to do something later on today?" Penny asked him.

"Anything in mind?"

"No, I can't swim with this dressing on ... just hang out, I guess!"

"Maybe! Give me a ring later."

Penny seemed reluctant to go home, so they just sat in the kitchen talking about anything that came to mind.

It was a week or so after Cassie's party and Paul's parents had gone away for the weekend, so he was fending for himself. At about 9:30 on Saturday evening, the front door rang. Penny stood on the doorstep; she'd been crying.

"What's the matter, Pen! What's happened?" She stepped into the hallway and put her arms around him.

"I've just broken up with Jimmy!"

"Okay, let's have a coffee and you can tell me about it! Do your mum and dad know you're here, he might come looking for you?"

"I don't want to see him any more, Paulie..."

"You say that now, because you're upset, but things might look differ­ent tomorrow." She shook her head.

" ... Don't think so."

He carried the coffees through to the sitting room, where he sat on the sofa and she sat close to him. She pulled his arm around her.

"He's jealous ... of you, Paulie! He said I care more about you, than him. I told him that I've known you since we were five and you're my best friend; and that I didn't expect him to give up his football, so why should I stop seeing you. Anyway, we said some other things and we kind of agreed it wasn't working and we should stop seeing each other."

"I still think you might feel differently tomorrow, Pen. But you can stay here for as long as you want, if you don't want to go home, but I'll walk you back, later, if you do." She snuggled up closer. They were still sitting there at nearly midnight.

"Do you want me to take you home now, Pen?"

"Not really ... can't we just stay like this?"

"No, not really, but you can stay here tonight, if you like!"

"Yes, please!"

When they got upstairs they both brushed their teeth, then they undressed and she lay in bed with his arm around her. Penny leaned in and kissed him and they went to sleep.

In the morning she woke up before Paul and slipped off of his arm, so that she could go to the bathroom. She took her phone with her and checked for messages. There was one from Jimmy, sent at 10:38 the previous night: I'm sorry, Penny! Forgive me. Can I see you tomorrow? She sent one back: Sorry, Jimmy ... it's over!

Then she went back to bed and lay on Paul's shoulder again. He opened his eyes.

"Go back to sleep," she whispered. He closed his arm around her and did just that.

Paul opened his eyes again. He could feel Penny's breath on his neck. It was strange ... not unpleasant, just strange. He raised his head to look at his alarm clock at the side of the bed.

"Penny," he said quietly, "Penny ... wake up!" She stirred and her eyes fluttered open.

"Morning, Paulie!"

"It's nearly lunchtime, Pen, are your mum and dad expecting you back; won't they be worried?"

She rolled over and fumbled for something on the floor next to the bed. Then she rolled back again, before turning on her phone. Ignoring the fact that she had a text message, she keyed something in and held the phone to her ear.

"Morning, Mum. I'm next door ... I broke up with Jimmy last night. Yes, I'm all right ... I'll be home in a little while. No, no messages. See you soon!" She rolled in towards Paul. "What time are your folks getting back today?"

"I'm not sure; it might be late. Why didn't you look at your text?"

"You know why! You know it's probably from Jimmy. Do you want to come over and eat with us, later?"

"No, thanks, Pen, Mum's left me cold meat in the fridge. But thanks for asking."

"Well, I suppose I ought to be getting home, then! I'll have a nice bath: I'm all hot and sweaty! But thanks anyway for the shoulder last night, Paulie ... shall I come back later?"

"Have you got anything you need to do for school tomorrow?"

"Yes, a bit, but I can bring it here and do it."

They both got off of the bed. Penny dressed and slipped on her shoes and tried to straighten her creased and rumpled clothing.

"See you later, then!" she said, before kissing him.

Some time has elapsed since Penny's break up with her boyfriend.

"Do you think he's given up, now, Pen?"

"I hope so!" she said, as they walked to the bus stop, on the morning journey to school. "I haven't been nasty, and I've replied to all the texts he sent. At least he never came to the school, or home, and it's been a week since the last one."

"But you two were pretty close, weren't you? You can't blame him for wanting to keep that going." Penny stopped dead.

"Paulie! You think that we ... We never did! I know he wanted to, and it got a bit 'steamy' sometimes, but I've never, not since Michael Stewart ... how could you think that?" He looked a bit shame-faced.

"I'm sorry, I just assumed ... After all, you're a beautiful, sexy woman, not a child, and you used to stay out all night. What man wouldn't want you in that way?"

" ... Well, you, apparently!" she said, a little huffily, "Come on!" She tugged on his hand, but never let go, " ... If we miss that bus..."

She didn't avoid him in school ... they never hung around each other all the time, anyway ... but she gave him some strange looks during the morning classes they shared. At lunchtime they usually wandered out of school, when Penny was mostly to be found in a little knot of girlfriends; but Paul would often go out alone. Today, however, he was caught up by his friend, who as usual slid her hand into his.

"Daft prat!" she said warmly, " ... So are you going to buy me some lunch, Paulie!"

That afternoon they sat together in the school library, looking at the current university admissions guide and the individual university prospec­tuses. Paul was looking at Computer Science, but Penny was interested in English and Economics.

"It's an odd combination, but I don't see why you can't do joint honours; or just one of them 'with' the other, if you want to," Paul said. [In the British system, English with Economics, for example, denotes a major and minor subject choice]

"Mmm, I know! But I've already decided: I'm only applying to the same places as you, Paulie; and if they don't offer us both a place, I don't want to go anywhere else!"

"That's not a very practical approach, is it! And, anyway, can I really put up with you for another three years at least?" he said, playfully. She looked at him and smiled sweetly.

" ... Well ... I'm afraid you don't have any say in the matter!"

So they only looked at universities that offered all those courses and they chose four: Durham, East Anglia, Manchester, and Sussex; and not even because of their reputations, but because they liked the look of the campuses and the places...

On Friday, on their way home from school, Penny said:

"It's Katy Cresswell's party tomorrow, are you taking me, Paulie?"

"Yes, I think so; I need a break from revision. What time does it start?"

"Eight o'clock, but that means we don't need to get there before nine. Come round about seven, though."

It was one of the advantages of living next door to your best friend. Two minutes before seven he called out:

"I'm not sure what time I'll be in, Mum ... so don't lock the door." Then he pulled the front door closed behind him and walked the few yards to Penny's house.

"Hello, Mrs Palmer ... I am expected."

"Hello. Paul! Yes, go up, Dear!"

Paul knocked politely, then went into the bedroom. Penny was sitting on the bed with a towel around her, drying her short hair, so Paul slouched down on the bed behind her, waiting for her to finish.

"I shouldn't be long, Paulie."

He knew her well enough not to wonder how long 'long' meant in actual time. Penny took a jar of white cream and began to rub it into her long, slender legs and then her arms and shoulders. She stood up and unwrapped the towel, then sat down again. With a handful of moisturiser in one hand, she passed the jar back to Paul, who took some of the cream and worked it into her back, while she did her belly and boobs; and finally, standing up again, her bum and thighs. She turned to face him.

"Look!" she said, indicating her flower and butterfly tattoo on her left hand hip and lower belly, "It looks really lovely with the moisturiser on it!"

"And how about this?" he said, lightly touching the small gold ring that passed through her clitoral hood.

"Oh, it's fine, now ... I quite forget it's there most of the time."

Taking fresh underwear out of a drawer she put it on, then a pair of minimal, denim shorts and a cotton top. Her outfit was completed with lightweight sandals.

"Come on! Don't sit around all night!" Penny said, holding out her hand to him.