Chapter 14

Beth Ann's eyes grew wide when I made my proclamation. There was a mixture of puzzlement, surprise and something else I couldn't identify in her eyes. I'd made a rookie mistake and knew it, instantly. Beth Ann was not as devoted to a life-long love affair with the person she thought was her son, nearly as much as I was devoted to being with her.

Everything takes time and I was seriously rushing her. It was time to back off and let it happen naturally. I was sure the sheen of new love, great sex and an attentive and devoted lover overwhelmed Beth Ann. Once reality set in, she probably was swimming in doubt.

To get back towards an even keel, I turned the conversation to the weekend. We had two days ahead of us, then Beth Ann would start her new job and I would begin my career back on minimum wage, at Mr. Bell's marina.

I wasn't frustrated about starting at the bottom, again. Even though I'd worked my way through this stage once, there was no getting around having to do it again. No sense fighting with myself and no sense allowing it to affect my attitude.

Now starting high school all over again did get me down. Try as I might, there was no way to look forward to insecure guys, trying to one up each other to get a girl's attention, crummy food in the cafeteria and untalented teachers attempting to put in their time until retirement. None of it appealed to me but the circumstances that saved me from dying in my Toyota landed me here and this was my life, so whining wouldn't change anything.

Beth Ann talked a little about her new job and the people she'd met, briefly, the other day. She was excited to be starting over, away from Bruce, without the old baggage and I appreciated where she was coming from, as I was starting completely over, too. Listening to Beth Ann anticipating the new job, responsibilities and challenges, I realized this was not only important but really good for her, too.

Change can be toxic, or invigorating. Beth Ann embraced change the way other people embrace dessert. She bubbled with enthusiasm about the things she could try and the ways to improve their customer's experience. If she was excited, then I was too.

We ate quickly and cuddled on the couch, watching a movie on HBO. By eleven thirty we were ready to crash and as fast as we cleaned up and got ready, we were cuddled up and dreaming about Monday and our new jobs.

Saturday was pretty laid back. We got up late, staggered around a while and then went out to find the marina and the best routes for Beth Ann to get to work. Colleen and Rebecca warned Beth Ann about the traffic on the strip, so she wanted to find alternative routes and memorize them all.

For about two hours we rode around downtown Branson, finding all the back ways to get from point A to point B and then decided to ride down to the lake and find a nice place for lunch, where we could sit and watch the water.

We chose an old fashioned restaurant, down by the beach that specialized in country style food and an unscheduled floor show. One of their servers thought he could really sing and at intervals, he would stand in the center of the dining room, strum a guitar and serenade everyone. The guy was quite a ham and ate up the applause when he finally quit. We enjoyed spending time without pressure and by late afternoon we were back home and in the hot tub.

Since it was Saturday, I didn't have to provide a sample for Rebecca and that made our time together more pleasant. Beth Ann discovered she could come from having me rub her clit at the same time I licked her rectum. I think that shocked her. We played around for a couple of hours, exhausted ourselves and took a little nap, waking after dark, disoriented and hungry.

While Beth Ann used the bathroom and cleaned up a little, I grilled us some sandwiches and had them by the bed when she came out. Supper conversation was all about Beth Ann. She was puzzled that she could get excited by having her bottom played with and wanted to talk about it and get my assurance I had no intention of taking her that way. "It was pleasant but that's all I want to have happen down there, got it," she asked, pointedly?

Of course we had to practice more extensively to be certain we knew where and what she wanted played with, and that took another couple of hours before we collapsed and slept straight through till morning. I like to think of our sexual exploration as strictly "scientific research." I'm pretty sure Beth Ann didn't believe me.

Her body was fascinating to me. We had developed a lack of modesty that allowed me access to her every way, anywhere and however I wanted. She touched herself when she got close but needed a little boost to get over the top. I rubbed my dick without fear of ridicule. We talked about trying new things and then tried most of them to see what there was to see, then talked about how it felt.

Beth Ann didn't seem to be holding back and I certainly was giving my all to our relationship.

Late Sunday afternoon, Beth Ann patted the couch next to her and drew me into a hug. She said, "I think I know what's going on here." That scared me. "You are like a different person - totally new - as if there is someone else in there, besides Brian. When you hit your head, I think some parts of your personality disappeared with your memory.

"I keep getting surprised when you say things that are totally out of character but you don't know what your character is, do you?

"My God that must be hard. I can't imagine how you're dealing with it so calmly. I think I'd be locked in a padded cell, wearing a strait jacket if I had to go through what you've just done. Brain, you are really something special and I am loving getting to know this version of you.

"I am afraid you are as attached to me as you are, because you're afraid and when that fear wears off, you won't want me nearly as much as you need me right now.

"Promise me you'll be honest when that time comes and not start sneaking around, like Bruce. Be a man and give me more courtesy than that. OK?" She had no idea. None.

'I know what I'm feeling is the real thing, Beth Ann." She started to interrupt so I hurried on. "You have given me more love, tenderness, affection and comfort in a week than most men get in a decade. Unless you are tired of me, I'm not going anywhere. Until and unless you say so, we are us. You and me.

"I guess my brain isn't fourteen, because what I feel for you is the thing most people dream of and never experience. Your smile is like a drug. I need it. Can you understand what I mean? I need your smile. It's that - I like seeing you smile. I need your smile to complete me.

"When you are in the other room, or another part of the house, I can't wait to come see what you're doing, just on the chance you will look up, see me and smile. And when you do? I feel it all over my body and can't wait to try and give you the joy you've been giving me.

"When I was licking your bottom yesterday and you asked me if that was gross, I told you no, because your body is this wonderful gift you're chosen to give me, so any part of your gift is beautiful, not gross and I am thrilled to touch, lick, rub, kiss, suck, and make love to all of it.

"Besides," I smiled. "It felt so naughty licking and sucking your bottom." She blushed and smiled at the same time. Mr. Johnson was ready for another round of Furry Friend Olympics but Beth Ann had another agenda.

"Brian, you say the most wonderful things. No fourteen year old boy knows how to seduce a woman like this. Tell me the truth. Where did all this confidence come from?"

I sighed. There had to be a way to put this particular question to bed, permanently and I had to find it. I gave her a sad look to make sure I had her attention and said, "Would you understand if I said, 'I don't know?

"There are so many things I don't know. It kind of drives me nuts, thinking about what I don't know and what I should know and when I will know and if I even ever will know.

"Last night, before I fell asleep, I was thinking about your furry friend and how your scent drives me completely crazy. Then I asked myself, 'how do I know how to make Beth Ann come like that?' Unless you're faking it, you come like crazy. It's the ultimate ego boost, for me.

"Watching your skin turn red, your eyes scrunch shut and your mouth open to moan, right before you come, makes me want to come without you even touching me. It's that intense and I love it but I don't know how I know I love it.

"Even though I want to answer your question, I don't know anything important except that I love you, right now and want to keep giving you the kinds of pleasure you are becoming accustomed to."