Chapter 1

"In my Father's house are many mansions. I go there now to prepare a place for you, that where I am, you may be also..."

An unseasonably hot wind blew across us as we stood before the grave of our beloved. My family closed ranks around Millie and Colleen as we gathered to say goodbye to Mr. Bell. It was on a hot day, during a hot week, at the end of a long, hot Indian Summer, that we came to this cemetery to say our last goodbyes.

His heart simply gave out, and no amount of emergency aid was enough. We had hired around the clock cardiologists and nurses specifically trained in caring for cardiac patients, and it bought him another six months, but in that time no compatible heart became available to be transplanted into his chest.

At the end he was perfectly at peace, giving me a long list of instructions on how he wanted to be mourned, remembered, and honored. Millie was devastated, but with the strength born into generations of American Pioneers, she stood tall and pretended to be brave for her daughter and grandchildren.

All three of them.

James Brian Nelson

Millicent Jane Nelson

David Gregory Nelson

My children were there beside me, in the loving care of Yolanda and Winnie.

We had climbed the hill to our family plot once before, two months ago, to say a sad goodbye to my one-time, true love, Rebecca Temple. She was felled by an undiagnosed bi-polar condition that made her take her life before any of our bodyguards could intervene. The pain of losing Rebecca so tragically, compounded the terrible pain of separation I was experiencing after losing Mr. Bell.

David Gregory Nelson surprised his mother, and then me, by being our child, not the son of some assistant manager, at some store in the mall. About a month before Rebecca took her own life, David was dropped off at our front gate. David's DNA tests, which we had done immediately, were conclusive. Rebecca must have know that when she abandoned him.

David was OUR child ... and just as strongly loved and cherished as Millie J. and Jimmy B. Colleen, and Winnie shared my feelings about our second son, and lavished all three of our children with love and loving attention.

Mr. Bell's brother Hank and his wife, JoAnna stood with us, along with Colleen's brother, Coulter, who refused to stand beside his mother for some unknown reason. Mr. Bell's dying hit Hank so hard he hadn't spoken a word since Tuesday when Winnie called and gave him the sad news.

'Where did you go, Rebecca?

'Are you there with Mr. Bell, today?

'Are you smiling again?

'Did the sickness relinquish its hold on you?

'Are you happy????'

The thoughts that tormented me were all about regrets.

What part did I play in causing Rebecca to go completely over the edge?

What could I have done differently to keep it from happening?

What should I have said, or not said, that contributed to her final, fatal, state of mind?

What was she thinking at the end?

Why did she hurt us so badly?

What did she gain by dying?

Why... ???????

Just why...

Why... ???????

Why indeed...

The Pastor from the Southern Baptist Church finished the interment ceremony, and we could mercifully take the family out of the sun and heat and inside where it was cool.

There are so few of us...

Our family was one fewer today, another one weaker, one man less, one life less.

Oh my God in Heaven - I HATED how sad I felt.

Dying was much easier than losing Mr. Bell.

Mr. Bell was the only man in my life I ever thought of as a father, and now the lessons he taught me had to last for the rest of my life.

We never got to talk again after he explained how he divided up his estate, to 'protect' Coulter by only permitting him access to fifty percent the income off his third of Mr. Bell's trust, for life. Colleen would manage the other two-thirds left to her and Millie.

Hank and JoAnna inherited a separate trust that had a little more than ten million dollars in it, plus they received Mr. Bell's portion of the marina.

Millie was devastated. Word reached me that Mr. Bell tried to put his arms around Millie, but collapsed and stopped breathing, instead. I ran to her and held her while she cried. "I lost the only man I ever truly knew," she cried against my chest, as Colleen held on to me from behind.

Eventually I got us all fixed so I had my arms around them both, and held them while we cried together.

Hank and JoAnna came as soon as they got word, followed by a steady stream of family, friends, and loved ones. The hospice physician arranged to have Mr. Bell picked up by the funeral home. Winnie, Yolanda, and I devoted ourselves to caring for Millie and Colleen, as well as taking special care of the children.

Winnie had the presence of mind to have our staff called in to handle the kitchen and bedrooms for those who would travel for the funeral. Jack took care of the gate and grounds, to make sure we were protected. I asked him to make the jet available to bring any of Mr. Bell's family to Branson, who lived away, though there didn't seem to be any.

Sandra arrived and took possession of Millie, caring for her like a beloved sister. Meghan arrived, and we put her to work handling the phones and emails, getting out a press release from the team, and keeping our businesses from intruding on our family.

Mr. J., Mason, Wayne, and a host of people from the big club were there for Mr. Bell's viewing and funeral service. His burial was private, just for us. Our property was large enough for us to create a family plot when Rebecca left us. Mr. Bell joined her behind the white metal gates.

Someday Millie, Colleen, and I would be buried there.

It was a long week.

For a while, either Colleen, or I would sit with Millie until she fell asleep. Her need to grieve was obvious and we wanted to be supportive in any way necessary. Those nights when it was my turn to sit beside Millie, we would chatter like a couple of high school girls, with no topic off limits.

It was during one of those bedtime chats that Millie talked about her first time. Mr. Bell had told Colleen, Rebecca and I his version of what transpired the evening after he proposed, and their sexual discoveries on the old couch, in her parents' basement. Millie's side of the story was much more descriptive, romantic, and all around sweet.

"Jim was totally smitten with me from the first time we met at the USO club. He found diabolical ways to get off base and come see me. Daddy was annoyed, but instead of scandalized, Mother seemed to just love him. They gave us lots of freedom to get to know each other, but I don't think they intended us to become quite as close as we did that night.

"I was home waiting for Jim. Daddy and Mother were out at Mother's sister's house, due to her having a new baby. Daddy did the driving in our house. Mother wouldn't think of driving in those days.

"I could tell something was on Jim's mind that night. He kept fidgeting and I started to fear he was being shipped out, so I gave him every signal a girl can give her boyfriend, to get on with the bad news, but he just kept looking at me with those big, blue eyes, and smiling at me.

"He looked so sexy in his uniform, and I could feel my self-control slipping to the back of my head, as we kissed, hugged, and softly talked. Finally Jim reached in his pocket and brought out this tiny, gold band, about the size of a piece of string. I knew he was proposing and I felt this rush of arousal in between my legs. I can tell you I never felt anything like THAT before.

"He looked at me with his silly, off balance smile, and said, "I don't want to spend another minute without you as my bride. Millicent will you marry me?"