Chapter 34

Have you ever seen a cat sleep upside down ... flat on their back? I've seen kittens do it. I've seen kittens sleep upside down with their rear paws crossed, their front paws crossed and even both front and rear paws crossed. I've even stuck a lily of the valley stalk in crossed front paws, took a picture of it and won a contest for a funeral home.

Doesn't She Look Natural?

The picture just after the flash was cute, too. That kitten had shredded lily everywhere. When I showed the after pic to the funeral director, he said, "We don't promise resurrection," he started laughing.

Imagine that ... a funeral director with a sense of humor.

Mom Bobcat was sleeping upside down ... while Grace played with her kits.

Kits ... with a K ... not what you pervs were thinking.

"I can't imagine the pure trust involved in that, Grace," I whispered.

Mom Bob started running in her sleep ... upside down. She yowled in her sleep and started sniffing the air ... still asleep.

"I think she's waking up," said Grace. "What did you do with the hamburger?"

I slapped myself on the forehead, "Shit!"

"David," said Grace, "Don't tell me you forgot it!"

"Ok."

"Ok, what?"

"Ok, I won't tell you I forgot it." I got up and fetched the packet from just outside the door.

"If you weren't my brother..." the rest was best left unsaid ... she did.

Grace gestured with her left-hand kit. "Sit," she said, "As soon as she's awake, I'll introduce you to Isabelle."

"Isabelle?"

"Isabelle."

Isabelle woke up.

Cats ... house cats ... tend to wake up like their pets ... slowly, stretching, yawning, washing eyes and seeking the morning pee.

Feral cats wake UP.

Mom Bob was an interesting combination of both. She was ready to fight... 'as soon as I get my feet under me.' There was the yawn and stretch but she was alert ... mostly. Then she did something I have always wished my cats would do ... she peed in the water ... Eww! But, fish do it. Then she noticed Grace and the lap full of kits.

Grace spoke a few words in Cat ... Mom Bob looked at me.

Grace said, "Isabelle. This is my brother, David. David, this is Isabelle." And, so help me ... Isabelle held out her right paw. We shook.

"Pleased to meet you, Isabelle."

"Murglefpt," said Isabelle. She showed her teeth ... I showed mine. She moved up and sniffed my breath and breathed on me. I sniffed hers ... EWW! Rotten fish! She bent her head.

"Bump heads, David," Grace said.

My sister has moments when I doubted her sanity ... this was one of them.

"Do it."

With a shrug, I bumped heads with a full grown mother Bobcat. There was a visible and audible spark. I sat back ... she sat back.

Hello, David.

Of course I wasn't buying that ... voices in my head ... especially from a cat. I'm just recycled not crazy.

And why not?

Then I was unimportant. Izzy had more important things that she needed to do ... like move her Kits back to the nest.

They objected. But ... MOM ... we like Grace.

I didn't think that was outrageous ... I like Grace, too.

"David?"

"Grace?"

"Come here. Touch heads." Ooo, that's lovely. Her eyes got huge ... she slapped me. I'm your sister, David. You shouldn't think like that.

"Grace ... you're my sister," I said, "All brothers think of their beautiful and built sisters like that ... and mothers ... Lucy Lou!! Ooo!"

That got me another slap.

By this time, Isabelle had reinstalled her kittens in the bags ... and again ... and again ... it was cute until the most adventurous fell in the slip. Mom just sat there. Grace just sat there.

I dropped my shorts and jumped in, rescued the little darling and adopted a bobcat ... that wasn't exactly what I had in mind. I don't know what I had in mind ... I just couldn't let the cutie drown.

Isabelle thought at me ... listen ... I know it doesn't work like that ... this isn't science fiction ... or magic ... well maybe a little magic ... OK OK Ok ... a lot of magic ... but telepathic bobcats? Come on! Get real! ... it's all in my head ... isn't it? Well ... isn't it?

Isabelle said in my head, She's your kit now. I wish you luck!

Mouth to mouth with a bobcat kit ... you should try it some time. It was interesting ... and disgusting ... she puked.