78: Commitments

I ran downstairs Saturday afternoon to answer the door. Mom and Dad were out and Brenda and I had been studying in my room after our very successful taping session. Yes, I mean studying. It had been harder lately to have Saturday study sessions with taping the show in the morning and trying to make the afternoon special for my dates. At least I felt like I was spending a little time with each of the girls who were important to me now. I still wasn't sure about this thing with Brenda. She seemed committed to Carl and Louise, but stubbornly committed to me as well.

The UPS guy had a package for me. I tried to remember if I'd ordered something, but the label set my mind at rest. It was from New York and clearly said 'Heaven.' I ran upstairs and quickly started to open the box.

"Ahem."

Brenda's voice got my attention and I looked up. She was sitting on the other side of my desk, right where I'd left her when the bell rang. Only now she was topless. Oh man, was she topless! I'd been naked with Brenda a few times and every time I was amazed at what I saw. They were big, but really not out of proportion for her body. I'd looked at 'men's magazines' at different times, mostly supplied by Carl's brother Bill. Some of the pictures are grotesque, like someone plastered huge melons on a little frame. Cartoonish. That wasn't the case with Brenda. She was about 5'4" and pretty broad across the shoulders. As a cheerleader she worked out a lot and her stomach was trim. Her breasts were soft and she'd never pass a pencil test, but you'd have to invent some sort of cantilevered or anti-gravity system to keep something that heavy from sagging a little. She had large, pale areolae and fat stubby nipples that were definitely asking for attention.

"Who is your package from?" she asked innocently.

"Uh..." My mouth was dry. "Heaven."

"Oh! New pictures? Let's see." See what? Oh, pictures. How could she take off her shirt and present those beautiful breasts to me and talk about pictures? I fumbled with the paper. Brenda just sat there smirking at me. I carefully removed several copies of what appeared to be the same magazine. It dawned on me that they were all the same issue of Vanity Fair that I'd picked up from a magazine rack in Seattle, but each magazine was in a different language. The face on the cover, though, was unmistakably Heaven. "How cool. She sent you all the different editions! Where do you keep all her pictures, Brian?"

"Last spring I bought a used file cabinet." I waved vaguely at the gray box in the corner of my room. "I've filed them by date." Brenda went to the cabinet and opened the middle drawer. There was nothing in it. "Only the bottom two drawers are full so far. I think these will about finish the space I've got in the second drawer."

"You have them all protected in plastic bags? This is the kind of collection that will be worth a fortune someday."

"I don't collect them to sell," I said. "It's the only link I have with her." I shuffled through the magazines and a slip of hotel letterhead fell out. I looked at it. Brian, I'm so sorry I missed you at Christmas. Got home to surprise Daddy late Christmas Eve and had to take off on Monday for a big New Year's party in New York. Sorry we couldn't get together. Life is exciting with one party after another, but I miss you and still regret ... Know that each picture I send is sent with my love. Heaven.

Brenda was reading over my shoulder. She wrapped her arms around me and pressed her breasts against my face.

"I see. How could you ever sell them?" she sighed. "I'm not Heaven, honey, but I'm here."

I turned in my chair, scooped Brenda up in my arms, and took her to my bed. As soon as I picked her up, she started kissing me and as soon as she was on the bed she pulled my hands to her breasts as she struggled to get my shirt unbuttoned. As soon as we had our bare chests together we were able to relax and take our time. We kissed more gently and explored each other more fully. Our hips were moving against each other, but we didn't make any move to take our jeans off or to use our hands on each other. It was just a really heavy-duty petting session as we were stretched out on the bed half-naked.

"See? Aren't they hot?" Carl said behind me. What the fuck? I jumped to turn and face him, but Brenda's hand grabbed at my ear and pulled my mouth back to hers. I was about to get killed and I couldn't even see him coming up behind me.

"I think it's sweet. I wasn't sure at first, but even I can see how excited Brenda is," Louise said. She was moving as she spoke and in a moment she appeared on the bed over Brenda's left shoulder. Carl sat on the edge of the bed behind her. Not behind me.

There was a lot of pain and angst last spring when Carl and Brenda broke up and he started seeing Louise. Brenda came running to me and established herself as one of my special girls, even after she and Carl got back together. With Louise, too. Louise was different than the rest of us in some ways. Her mother was from India and her father was English. Her mother was one of the most beautiful women I'd ever seen. She was from Northern India and had comparatively fair skin. With an English father, Louise was only slightly darker than most of the rest of us and was sometimes thought to be Hispanic. She'd gotten quite a reputation for playing around when we were in junior high and freshmen, but that had all died once she started dating Carl. This fall, while I was so absorbed in my misery with Rhonda, she'd quietly joined our table. In November, she was voted in as a member of our agreement along with Nicolette, even though it was obvious that Louise was only interested in Carl and Brenda and Nicki was only interested in me—and maybe not very interested at that.

The sum was that Louise was more exotic than pretty. Taller than me, her slightly darker complexion, modest breasts, and black hair were in high contrast with Carl's red hair and Brenda's blonde. To see her stretch out next to Brenda and put her hand over mine on Brenda's breast started short-circuiting my brain.

"Carl, I'm sorry..." I started. Louise reached over and lightly slapped my face. Carl grinned.

"If you say you are sorry to be giving my girlfriend pleasure, I'll murder you," she said. "He's giving you pleasure, isn't he, babe?" she whispered to Brenda.

"Oh yeah," Brenda sighed. "I'm so glad you two came to join us. It took a while to get him started, but he's a really dreamy kisser." Talk about dreamy kissing, Brenda turned her body slightly toward Louise and they shared an incredible kiss, right in front of my face, as Louise continued to hold my hand to Brenda's breast and interlace her fingers with mine. Carl shuffled closer to Louise and petted her hair, putting little kisses along her neck as she and Brenda kissed.

"Guys, I really don't understand what the fuck is going on. I like you all and I don't want to get in the middle of your relationship."

"Kind of more like on one side of it," Carl laughed. "Let me tell you that even though you and Doug are my best friends, I've got no interest in either of you sexually. These two are almost more than I can handle."

"That's why we all wanted to be here this afternoon, Brian," Brenda said, kissing me again. "It's not to trap you, but to talk in our natural environment. We want to be part of your life."

"You guys are a part of my life. Carl, you and Doug have been my best friends since fifth grade. I just don't want to screw that up," I said.

"Here's the thing, Brian," Carl said. "Ever since this babe invited us smelly guys to join her table at lunch in fifth grade, you've been the glue that held us together. Hell, Brenda and I broke up so loudly and completely so many times that some teachers demanded that we sit on opposite sides of the room. But each time it was you that brought us back together. It was because neither of us wanted to let go of our friendship with you."

"She might not have told you," Louise added, "but it was true even when Carl and I got together. You're like a magnet of some sort. Somebody gets stuck to you and then somebody else gets stuck to that person. As long as you're there, everybody else sticks together. Brenda told us when we all got together this summer and started to work out our relationship that she loved you and that you were going to be part of any relationship going forward."

"Louise, you and I have hardly gotten to know each other this year. I can't even contemplate having that kind of relationship with you yet."

"That's good. Like Carl, I like you but I don't really have any interest in being sexual with you." She leaned back and kissed Carl thoroughly. "Of course, if you and I happened to be going two-on-one with Brenda, you'd probably get confused at some point and feel me up. It would probably be my hand pointing your cock at her pussy. But that's not between you and me. It's between us and loving our girlfriend."

"Hey man," Carl said as he reached over and slapped my shoulder. "We've got a lot to work out as far as a relationship goes. We've got the agreement and we've actually been studying up on how polyamorous relationships work. We're not going to stick around this afternoon and try to figure out everything while you've got Brenda's awesome tits pressed up against you." His hand slid up Brenda's side and joined Louise and mine in stroking Brenda's breast. She moaned.

"Besides," Louise said, "I'm good with the way this is going but you're right. We haven't spent much time together and I'm not ready to get naked with you all yet. I think, though, that I might go get naked with Carl while you two continue what you were doing when we interrupted." She raised her hand from Brenda's breast to grab my cheek and shake it gently. "And you'd better be good to my babe."

Brenda rolled more fully toward Louise and they shared a deep kiss. Louise stood and Carl took her place. Brenda kissed him as thoroughly. He stood and put an arm around Louise.

"See you guys later," he said and they left. I heard the downstairs door close.

"Wow!"

That's all I could say. I lay on my back next to Brenda on my bed. We were both naked and had come a bucketload in each other's mouths. Now she was draped over me and continued to give little nibbles and kisses on my chest. She hadn't given me time to process what Carl and Louise had said when they left, but went pretty damned wild on me. I found that she was dripping wet when she put her pussy on my mouth and swallowed my cock. And I mean swallowed it. She must have been working out with Carl because she took me right down her throat and licked the base of my cock with her tongue and lips.

"Feeling overwhelmed, lover?" Brenda asked.

"Um ... yeah. A little."

"Don't worry. It will work out. I know that it's harder to work out a relationship where there are multiple men than it is to work out one with multiple women. I think it's the way we're wired, for the most part. And it's not unusual for there to be a chain relationship where there is one group and within that group one person has a relationship with someone outside that group. Right now, that's where we are. Believe me when I say I've always loved Carl and I've fallen ass-over-teacup for Louise. When you actually see her, you'll discover how incredibly beautiful she is. But the thing is that this isn't where it's likely to end. You know from being with both of us that Rose and me like sharing you together. I think she's turned me on a little ever since I met her and we started cheering. That's when I first discovered that I might like girls a little, too."

"So you think Rose will want to be part of this thing?"

"I don't think Rose has any interest in either Carl or Louise at all. She might be okay if they were in the same room making love while the three of us were making love, but she'd never go with them any more than they'd welcome you to be with them without me. It's a weird dynamic."

"Yeah. It sure is."

"Don't think it's over. We really opened Pandora's box when we made that agreement as freshmen."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that both Doreen and Rachel want to be with you."

"But they've been with Doug forever. I mean, Doreen's his fucking sister!"

"That's just it. They're not fucking. No matter how much they love each other, I don't think they'll ever cross that last line. They fool around. They get naked together. They even get each other off. But I don't think Doug's cock will ever get in that pussy again."

"Again?"

"Said too much."

"But Doug's not seventeen yet."

"Long before the agreement."

"Oh."

"All I can say is to try to be open with your lovers and let it flow. You know Liz is crazy about you and has no desire to be with any woman at all. I mean, not even in the same bed with a guy. On the other hand, she daydreams about Lionel. I'm not saying there will ever be anything between them, but there could be. And believe me, she'd pass up that opportunity if it meant she couldn't be with you."

"Wow!"

"You know you're committed now and I won't let you out of it?" Nicolette said as we sat together on Monday. She'd been out of school for over a week, but somehow she'd managed to complete and pass all her finals. I'd welcomed her back to school and she actually gave me a hug after class as we walked to the cafeteria.

"What did I commit to, Nicki?" I was a little wary. Did she think that because I rode to the hospital and stayed with her until she was settled meant I was committed? She pushed a folded piece of paper at me. I looked at it and peeked inside. It was a solid black and white rendition of a rose.

"When we're eighteen and can legally get a tattoo, we're going to hold each other's hand while some strange dude with a ponytail and a missing tooth makes us bare our chests so he can tattoo a black rose on them."

"Um..."

"It's what saved me when I went whacko. You told me we still hadn't done that. It brought me back from that drug-induced hysteria and gave me a reason to be here. Thank you, Brian."

"Nicki, I'm not sure what to say."

"Don't worry. I'm not going to make you get one. You are just going to have to hold my hand and stare at my tits while the tattoo guy feels me up in the name of putting the tattoo on. Then you'll probably have to take me somewhere and fuck me to settle me down. I promise it won't be too bad."

"Nicolette..." Christ! What was I supposed to say?

"Brian. Lighten up. My drugs are back in balance and I have a little bit of a sense of humor. I just want you to know that ... what you did ... that was a lot more than a friend would do. I know you'd do it for any person sitting at this table. It's just that even after signing the agreement, I didn't really think of myself as one of your girlfriends. I didn't think I'd mean that much to you. Um ... thank you." I reached out and squeezed her hand and people started filling in the spaces around us, laughing, talking, and welcoming Nicolette back to school.

Doug got my attention just before basketball practice and asked me to wait for him after and he'd give me a lift. That wasn't particularly unusual. We hadn't organized anything this week, but often gave each other lifts after practice. I wasn't expecting Rachel to meet me when I walked out of the locker room. We laughed about strangers in strange places and pretty soon Doug came out and we headed for his car. Only it was Doreen driving tonight. Doug slid into the front seat and gave his sister a kiss. Rachel waited for me to hold the back door open for her and only moved half way across the seat when she got in.

"I told your mom you were being kidnapped tonight, so she isn't waiting dinner for you," Doreen said. We headed for Azar's Big Boy. It struck me that we had a lot of burger joints around our town and that we sort of moved from one to another. For a while we'd all end up at the White Spot or the Diner or now at Azar's. As weather started to get warmer, we'd hit Dairy Queen or Dog 'n Suds. On the way to the restaurant, Rachel reached over and took my hand. Uh-oh. Brenda had warned me. We got to the restaurant and she didn't let go as we were being led to our seats. Doreen and Doug held hands as well.

"So what's the occasion for kidnapping me?" I asked. "Not that I'm objecting. We don't get to spend anywhere near as much time together as I'd like except in basketball practice."

"Yeah. And with you and your TV show, we haven't even gotten Saturday study sessions lately."

"Maybe we could start getting together on Sunday afternoon if people want to," I suggested.

"That would be fun," Rachel said.

"Might as well get down to it," Doreen said. "All he can do is run screaming out the door." I looked at her. Rachel still had a near death-grip on my hand.